this is the common knowledge I was talking about. EVERYONE knows that if you quit today your baby will be healthier. No one is disputing that. Also, moms are encouraged to cut down as much as possible….I think if you’re smoking a pack a day, you’re not making much of an effort, and are likely using the advice as an excuse.
…would you rather take the opinion of two OB/GYN’s and a family practitioner, or a mid-wife/pre-natal teacher? I don’t think it’s a myth, and like I said…if it’s not based in science (which it may be), it’s focused on harm reduction. That probably means they’ve looked at the relapse factor, the affects of trying to quit and failing, the relationship tension between spouses, the guilt, etc etc, and determined that if sneaking the odd smoke helps to reduce the stress of those situations, it's less harmful.
Yes, it’s a choice. You’ve got to realize overcoming a dependancy is not as easy as choosing to do so. Do you have any idea how smug ‘What’s the problem? Just quit!” sounds to an addict? No, smokers wouldn’t die without smokes. Would they be stressed? I bet they would.... Disease or no, making it a choice not to smoke doesn't give a person relief from withdrawl.
After experiencing the birth of 2 kids (I'm a guy BTW so I was the support not the person who did the actual work) I would 100% take the word of a mid-wife over a family practitioner regarding birthing and babies health and I would have serious reservations about taking the advice of an OB-GYN over that of a mid-wife. Maybe it's different where you live but where I live the mid-wives we used are amazing and birthing babies is what they know.
I don't care how smug it is to say just quit. It is what it is. Just do it. I probably have a handful of smokes a year which I enjoy while drinking. It's a great vice but it sure tastes and smells awful the next day.
1/12/1879, 4/8/1156, 2/6/1977, who gives a shit, ...
This whole thing is making me sick to my stomach. She goes into the bathroom to smoke, she knows I know. she hides them in there and I count how many she is having....15 today......this is causing me major anxiety where I can barely sleep. It's all I think about all day. I read more stuff online about it which causes me panic. I just don't know how I can feel at peace with all of this. Can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with this. Her first kid she smoked with...who is 15 now is ok so it almost seems like she believes because that kid is fine, this one will be too. The fact that her smoking can be hurting my child is extremely upsetting and not to mention damaging to the relationship. If something bad were to happen how can I get over something like this. This is the reason I wanted her to stop smoking first than get pregnant...that is why we PLANNED the pregnancy. I knew emotionally I couldn't handle her smoking while pregnant with my baby.
I have been actually picturing the baby suffering in the womb and I get fucking hot flashes through my whole body. I knew I couldn't handle this bullshit.
I have been actually picturing the baby suffering in the womb and I get fucking hot flashes through my whole body. I knew I couldn't handle this bullshit.
OK... this is going to sound harsh and you may think I'm a bitch but you are a bit of a drama queen here and it seems you need as much help as she does (but in different ways). This thread is full of advice, thoughts and experiences. Work with it. She has an addiction issue (physical and psychological) that she needs to sort out WITH HELP. Shoving her face in it will not help as she already knows it's not right (she is hiding to smoke). She knows you are checking on her behind her back and that doesn't help to open communication lines to try and sort out this problem. Just looking at your last two posts seem to suggest you are concerned about YOUR feelings and wallowing in your misery... 'causing ME panic', 'causing ME major anxiety' 'making ME sick', 'I couldn't handle', etc. Snap out of it and think about her feelings/what she is going through. Hormones are all over the place, pregnancy is not something women sail through automatically. If everytime you 'talk' about it you are being judgemental, confrontational and expressing how YOU feel and how she is wrong and being a bad mother to be, it's not going to give her the support she needs to quit or reduce her smoking. A bit of empathy would go a long way...
All of the replies I've read seem to deal with whether a woman should smoke or not. If quitting is too overwhelming, how about convincing her to remove all other toxins the foetus might be exposed to? For example, not eating processed/genetically engineered food. Not taking alcohol and caffeine. Not consuming preservatives, artificial sweeteners, colourings, flavourings, etc. Limiting exposure to magnetic fields and electronics like computers, big screen TVs and mobile phones. Using a reverse-osmosis filter to remove chlorine and fluoride from the water.
I've heard that some cigarettes claim to be made only of tobacco. They do not contain additives like benzene, arsenic, and whatnot. That could be worth looking into. (When I enjoyed the hobby of smoking, I used a common brand-name. So I have no experience with any other cigarette.)
Oh, don't forget the great things a woman can add: Western populations are severely deficient in omega-3 fatty acids. Flax/linseed is the best mercury-free source of these. Natural sunlight is the best source of vitamin D, and walking outdoors in the fresh air is one of the safest aerobic exercises. All three (Omega-3s, sunlight, and walking) are often considered natural cures for depression.
If she is considering taking a flu shot, go to http://www.fda.gov and read the package inserts for the various vaccines offered this year. They are labelled as Pregnancy Category C! They have never been tested on pregnant women or unborn children or nursing mothers. Here are direct quotes from the insert for Sanofi Pasteur's Fluzone and its Influenza A H1N1 2009 monovalent: " have not been evaluated for carcinogenic or mutagenic potential, or for impairment of fertility."
"It is not known whether these vaccines can cause fetal harm when administered to a pregnant woman or can affect reproductive capacity."
do you guys have a good relationshiop? ... i didn't read anything but maybe her smoking is really her way of getting back at you for something ... just something to consider ...
the problems with smoking manifests itself in many ways - it's not just the obvious ... if you're dating a smoker - you have to accept all that comes with that ... some people really have no interest in quitting ...
I have been actually picturing the baby suffering in the womb and I get fucking hot flashes through my whole body. I knew I couldn't handle this bullshit.
OK... this is going to sound harsh and you may think I'm a bitch but you are a bit of a drama queen here and it seems you need as much help as she does (but in different ways). This thread is full of advice, thoughts and experiences. Work with it. She has an addiction issue (physical and psychological) that she needs to sort out WITH HELP. Shoving her face in it will not help as she already knows it's not right (she is hiding to smoke). She knows you are checking on her behind her back and that doesn't help to open communication lines to try and sort out this problem. Just looking at your last two posts seem to suggest you are concerned about YOUR feelings and wallowing in your misery... 'causing ME panic', 'causing ME major anxiety' 'making ME sick', 'I couldn't handle', etc. Snap out of it and think about her feelings/what she is going through. Hormones are all over the place, pregnancy is not something women sail through automatically. If everytime you 'talk' about it you are being judgemental, confrontational and expressing how YOU feel and how she is wrong and being a bad mother to be, it's not going to give her the support she needs to quit or reduce her smoking. A bit of empathy would go a long way...
Now I will wait for people to throw things at me.
Well not me- I totally agree and my post pages back brings empathy to this young pregnant woman. Maybe thru support and not disapproval she can cut back, maybe not quit but cut back. She and the father to be can be a united loving unit which is the best for the unborn child.
After experiencing the birth of 2 kids (I'm a guy BTW so I was the support not the person who did the actual work) I would 100% take the word of a mid-wife over a family practitioner regarding birthing and babies health and I would have serious reservations about taking the advice of an OB-GYN over that of a mid-wife. Maybe it's different where you live but where I live the mid-wives we used are amazing and birthing babies is what they know.
I don't care how smug it is to say just quit. It is what it is. Just do it. I probably have a handful of smokes a year which I enjoy while drinking. It's a great vice but it sure tastes and smells awful the next day.
I’m not normally one to take a doctors’ advice as gospel, I was just pointing out that this was not some made-up excuse that smoking moms use. You sound like the kind of person that really drives a smoker nuts – a preachy weekend smoker. If you can smoke that lightly, do you really understand the addiction? I’m guessing not.
I have been actually picturing the baby suffering in the womb and I get fucking hot flashes through my whole body. I knew I couldn't handle this bullshit.
OK... this is going to sound harsh and you may think I'm a bitch but you are a bit of a drama queen here and it seems you need as much help as she does (but in different ways). This thread is full of advice, thoughts and experiences. Work with it. She has an addiction issue (physical and psychological) that she needs to sort out WITH HELP. Shoving her face in it will not help as she already knows it's not right (she is hiding to smoke). She knows you are checking on her behind her back and that doesn't help to open communication lines to try and sort out this problem. Just looking at your last two posts seem to suggest you are concerned about YOUR feelings and wallowing in your misery... 'causing ME panic', 'causing ME major anxiety' 'making ME sick', 'I couldn't handle', etc. Snap out of it and think about her feelings/what she is going through. Hormones are all over the place, pregnancy is not something women sail through automatically. If everytime you 'talk' about it you are being judgemental, confrontational and expressing how YOU feel and how she is wrong and being a bad mother to be, it's not going to give her the support she needs to quit or reduce her smoking. A bit of empathy would go a long way...
Now I will wait for people to throw things at me.
I’ll throw a compliment at ya…great post! How novel; proactive advice…….and empathy? Sounds like you’re asking a bit much from much of this crowd. There really has been some great advice in this thread, it sucks that it’s being overshadowed by this blanket condemnation….telling the OP that his wife is a horrible person and confirming what he already knows (smoking = bad) doesn’t help the situation at all. I also agree that the OP needs to be more supportive and less dramatic. Chill the fuck out and TALK to your wife…civilly and openly. You’re in this together…butting heads and trying to ‘win’ is going to make it all worse.
TravisTheSky offers some great advice as well. I hope people in this thread would take ALL of that advice before passing judgement. Cause smoking is not the only common habit that can detrimentally affect a babies’ health. It’s just the easiest one to condemn. Whatever makes a person feel better about themselves, right? I’d be willing to bet that a good chunk of the people that cast judgement on smokers are obese fast food junkies, or pop anti-depressants like candy, or have some other vice that is more socially acceptable, yet just as harmful. But hey, fuck those leper smokers and their baby abusing ways. :roll:
Oh boo hoo.....poor girl......blah blah blah.....
She just needs to grow some fucking balls and QUIT! :x
That’s some great advice ziggy, I’m sure they never thought of that....You probably walk around telling homeless people to get jobs too, don't ya? tough love, right? :roll:
All of the replies I've read seem to deal with whether a woman should smoke or not. If quitting is too overwhelming, how about convincing her to remove all other toxins the foetus might be exposed to? For example, not eating processed/genetically engineered food. Not taking alcohol and caffeine. Not consuming preservatives, artificial sweeteners, colourings, flavourings, etc. Limiting exposure to magnetic fields and electronics like computers, big screen TVs and mobile phones. Using a reverse-osmosis filter to remove chlorine and fluoride from the water.
I've heard that some cigarettes claim to be made only of tobacco. They do not contain additives like benzene, arsenic, and whatnot. That could be worth looking into. (When I enjoyed the hobby of smoking, I used a common brand-name. So I have no experience with any other cigarette.)
Oh, don't forget the great things a woman can add: Western populations are severely deficient in omega-3 fatty acids. Flax/linseed is the best mercury-free source of these. Natural sunlight is the best source of vitamin D, and walking outdoors in the fresh air is one of the safest aerobic exercises. All three (Omega-3s, sunlight, and walking) are often considered natural cures for depression.
If she is considering taking a flu shot, go to http://www.fda.gov and read the package inserts for the various vaccines offered this year. They are labelled as Pregnancy Category C! They have never been tested on pregnant women or unborn children or nursing mothers. Here are direct quotes from the insert for Sanofi Pasteur's Fluzone and its Influenza A H1N1 2009 monovalent: " have not been evaluated for carcinogenic or mutagenic potential, or for impairment of fertility."
"It is not known whether these vaccines can cause fetal harm when administered to a pregnant woman or can affect reproductive capacity."
Excellent post... I'm impressed
Ironically, if she knows how much it stresses the op (which she must do), that would put MORE pressure and stress on her to quit.. which would make it almost impossible.
OP if you smother her with kindness, I guarantee that will make her feel 10x more guilty than ANY lecture you could imagine. Smoking is generally a result of boredom/stress... take away these factors and it makes it much easier to give up.
She may well be thinking 'why should I make MY pregnancy easier on HIM?'. Are you being supportive or are you constantly nagging? Please consider this!
The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
After experiencing the birth of 2 kids (I'm a guy BTW so I was the support not the person who did the actual work) I would 100% take the word of a mid-wife over a family practitioner regarding birthing and babies health and I would have serious reservations about taking the advice of an OB-GYN over that of a mid-wife. Maybe it's different where you live but where I live the mid-wives we used are amazing and birthing babies is what they know.
I don't care how smug it is to say just quit. It is what it is. Just do it. I probably have a handful of smokes a year which I enjoy while drinking. It's a great vice but it sure tastes and smells awful the next day.
I’m not normally one to take a doctors’ advice as gospel, I was just pointing out that this was not some made-up excuse that smoking moms use. You sound like the kind of person that really drives a smoker nuts – a preachy weekend smoker. If you can smoke that lightly, do you really understand the addiction? I’m guessing not.
Not sure how you point out that stress is not simply an excuse that smoking moms use -- I'm pretty sure that's exactly what it is.
I'm not preachy either though on a message board I may come across that way -- I really couldn't care less if people smoke regularly (pregnant or otherwise).
I never claimed to understand the addiction -- in fact from my experience I would say that the addiction is bullshit -- another excuse to justify regular smoking. Not sure why people don't just admit that they smoke because they like to. I'm also not even a weekend smoker -- I'm much lighter than that -- I enjoy a couple of smokes maybe once or twice a year.
1/12/1879, 4/8/1156, 2/6/1977, who gives a shit, ...
exellent post about being healthier overall but you don't address one of the major concerns.... oxygen loss.
A woman I used to work with couldn't quit while pregnant. Her doc gave her the go-ahead to smoke 3 cigs a day and to space them out; morning, afternoon, evening.
Strangely enough, after the baby was born, she quit. Mabe once the pregnancy becomes more real (when movement is felt), she will lay off or cut waaaaaaaaay back.
I really hope she can be honest with her doc and follow the instructions given to her.
Probably the stress the pregnant woman feels from her partner constantly harping on her over her bad habits is worse for everyone involved than the secret cigarette she sneaks here and there.
I've heard that stress during a pregnancy can result in a colicky baby.
I hope it's not true because otherwise I'm in store for some serious misery after my baby is born.
Do you think the chick who is smoking while pregnant would care if someone inhaled on a cigarette, walked up to her newborn baby, pressed their lips to the baby's lips and blew straight into the baby's mouth?
Bet she'd fucking go off her head if someone did that...........yet it's not far different from what she's doing now!
Not sure how you point out that stress is not simply an excuse that smoking moms use -- I'm pretty sure that's exactly what it is.
I'm not preachy either though on a message board I may come across that way -- I really couldn't care less if people smoke regularly (pregnant or otherwise).
I never claimed to understand the addiction -- in fact from my experience I would say that the addiction is bullshit -- another excuse to justify regular smoking. Not sure why people don't just admit that they smoke because they like to. I'm also not even a weekend smoker -- I'm much lighter than that -- I enjoy a couple of smokes maybe once or twice a year.
No, it's an excuse given to them by a trusted medical professional. That's what I've been trying to point out.
man, I hated smoking for most of the 20-some years I did it...I really did. I just hated the feeling of trying to quit more. It's really, really hard to quit when it's a near life long habit. But If you don't believe in addiction, I guess there is no convincing you of that.
Do you think the chick who is smoking while pregnant would care if someone inhaled on a cigarette, walked up to her newborn baby, pressed their lips to the baby's lips and blew straight into the baby's mouth?
Bet she'd fucking go off her head if someone did that...........yet it's not far different from what she's doing now!
we get it, she's a horrible, horrible person and shouldn't be reproducing.
Do you think the chick who is smoking while pregnant would care if someone inhaled on a cigarette, walked up to her newborn baby, pressed their lips to the baby's lips and blew straight into the baby's mouth?
Bet she'd fucking go off her head if someone did that...........yet it's not far different from what she's doing now!
we get it, she's a horrible, horrible person and shouldn't be reproducing.
This whole thing is making me sick to my stomach. She goes into the bathroom to smoke, she knows I know. she hides them in there and I count how many she is having....15 today......this is causing me major anxiety where I can barely sleep. It's all I think about all day. I read more stuff online about it which causes me panic. I just don't know how I can feel at peace with all of this. Can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with this. Her first kid she smoked with...who is 15 now is ok so it almost seems like she believes because that kid is fine, this one will be too. The fact that her smoking can be hurting my child is extremely upsetting and not to mention damaging to the relationship. If something bad were to happen how can I get over something like this. This is the reason I wanted her to stop smoking first than get pregnant...that is why we PLANNED the pregnancy. I knew emotionally I couldn't handle her smoking while pregnant with my baby.
smoking in the house is a VERY bad thing. 2nd hand smoke is WORSE than what she's inhaling first-hand.
are you going to be OK with her bouncing JR. on her knee with a cig hanging out of her mouth?
If it's bothering you this much now, I can't imagine how you're going to feel later on. Maybe you should consult with a lawyer and start documenting everything.
Not sure how you point out that stress is not simply an excuse that smoking moms use -- I'm pretty sure that's exactly what it is.
I'm not preachy either though on a message board I may come across that way -- I really couldn't care less if people smoke regularly (pregnant or otherwise).
I never claimed to understand the addiction -- in fact from my experience I would say that the addiction is bullshit -- another excuse to justify regular smoking. Not sure why people don't just admit that they smoke because they like to. I'm also not even a weekend smoker -- I'm much lighter than that -- I enjoy a couple of smokes maybe once or twice a year.
No, it's an excuse given to them by a trusted medical professional. That's what I've been trying to point out.
man, I hated smoking for most of the 20-some years I did it...I really did. I just hated the feeling of trying to quit more. It's really, really hard to quit when it's a near life long habit. But If you don't believe in addiction, I guess there is no convincing you of that.
I wasn't going to mention it but she's probably just as stressed when she smokes. Some say "the stress of quitting is worse than smoking..." I don't believe it either. I was stressed and felt guilty when I COULD smoke without harming anyone but myself. Which is why, after 22 years of smoking, I finally quit.
2 years on Halloween!!!!!
I said "why do I dislike myself so much? why do I do something that is KNOWN to be nothing but harmful and will most likely kill me?'
Do you think the chick who is smoking while pregnant would care if someone inhaled on a cigarette, walked up to her newborn baby, pressed their lips to the baby's lips and blew straight into the baby's mouth?
Bet she'd fucking go off her head if someone did that...........yet it's not far different from what she's doing now!
we get it, she's a horrible, horrible person and shouldn't be reproducing.
Settle down....
you make up a scenario that would never in a million years happen.. he calls you out on your sarcasm and you tell him to settle down! LMAO! You're a peach!
Do you think the chick who is smoking while pregnant would care if someone inhaled on a cigarette, walked up to her newborn baby, pressed their lips to the baby's lips and blew straight into the baby's mouth?
Bet she'd fucking go off her head if someone did that...........yet it's not far different from what she's doing now!
we get it, she's a horrible, horrible person and shouldn't be reproducing.
you make up a scenario that would never in a million years happen.. he calls you out on your sarcasm and you tell him to settle down! LMAO! You're a peach!
No I'm not.....I'm an apple!
And I said settle down because where did I say she's a horrible, horrible person who shouldn't be reproducing?!
I wasn't going to mention it but she's probably just as stressed when she smokes. Some say "the stress of quitting is worse than smoking..." I don't believe it either. I was stressed and felt guilty when I COULD smoke without harming anyone but myself. Which is why, after 22 years of smoking, I finally quit.
2 years on Halloween!!!!!
I said "why do I dislike myself so much? why do I do something that is KNOWN to be nothing but harmful and will most likely kill me?'
You're right that they probably feel guilty and stressed while smoking...I'm just amazed that some people think that laying a guilt trip on her, and telling her the stress is phony will help her stop doing it. I'm no shrink, but this makes no sense to me.
My daughter stopped thru her entire pregnancy and within 20 minutes of delivery snuck outside and smoked. She still is smoking, the baby is almost a year old, sher smokes outside.
I agree with whoever suggested punching her in the throat. Not that I advocate violence towards women, by all means.
You’re a fucking douche bag. Not that I advocate calling people names by any means.
Wow dude. You seriously need to take a pill, or 5000. It was an off cuff remark in reference to one made at the beginning of the thread. But in all seriousness, I am a former smoker and I have a hard time sympathizing with people that continue to smoke knowing full well that their actions may have repercussions on their unborn baby. I personally know a girl who got preggers out of high school by mistake, and then tried to force a miscarriage by smoking and drinking. She didn't have a miscarriage, but her baby was born a premie and had multiple problems. I'm not saying the OP's girl is doing that on purpose, but still, how can you defend the undefensable? She just needs to stop. Period. It's not that freaking hard, I don't care what people say.. I've done it! I know!
Make your life a mission - not an intermission. - Arnold Gasglow
Comments
I don't care how smug it is to say just quit. It is what it is. Just do it. I probably have a handful of smokes a year which I enjoy while drinking. It's a great vice but it sure tastes and smells awful the next day.
plus red bull gives you wings.. and who doesnt want to fly??
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
OK... this is going to sound harsh and you may think I'm a bitch but you are a bit of a drama queen here and it seems you need as much help as she does (but in different ways). This thread is full of advice, thoughts and experiences. Work with it. She has an addiction issue (physical and psychological) that she needs to sort out WITH HELP. Shoving her face in it will not help as she already knows it's not right (she is hiding to smoke). She knows you are checking on her behind her back and that doesn't help to open communication lines to try and sort out this problem. Just looking at your last two posts seem to suggest you are concerned about YOUR feelings and wallowing in your misery... 'causing ME panic', 'causing ME major anxiety' 'making ME sick', 'I couldn't handle', etc. Snap out of it and think about her feelings/what she is going through. Hormones are all over the place, pregnancy is not something women sail through automatically. If everytime you 'talk' about it you are being judgemental, confrontational and expressing how YOU feel and how she is wrong and being a bad mother to be, it's not going to give her the support she needs to quit or reduce her smoking. A bit of empathy would go a long way...
Now I will wait for people to throw things at me.
I've heard that some cigarettes claim to be made only of tobacco. They do not contain additives like benzene, arsenic, and whatnot. That could be worth looking into. (When I enjoyed the hobby of smoking, I used a common brand-name. So I have no experience with any other cigarette.)
Oh, don't forget the great things a woman can add: Western populations are severely deficient in omega-3 fatty acids. Flax/linseed is the best mercury-free source of these. Natural sunlight is the best source of vitamin D, and walking outdoors in the fresh air is one of the safest aerobic exercises. All three (Omega-3s, sunlight, and walking) are often considered natural cures for depression.
If she is considering taking a flu shot, go to http://www.fda.gov and read the package inserts for the various vaccines offered this year. They are labelled as Pregnancy Category C! They have never been tested on pregnant women or unborn children or nursing mothers. Here are direct quotes from the insert for Sanofi Pasteur's Fluzone and its Influenza A H1N1 2009 monovalent: " have not been evaluated for carcinogenic or mutagenic potential, or for impairment of fertility."
"It is not known whether these vaccines can cause fetal harm when administered to a pregnant woman or can affect reproductive capacity."
the problems with smoking manifests itself in many ways - it's not just the obvious ... if you're dating a smoker - you have to accept all that comes with that ... some people really have no interest in quitting ...
Make your life a mission - not an intermission. - Arnold Gasglow
the newborn will not develop lung cancer from mommie smoking...which is why i say they are the same.
I’ll throw a compliment at ya…great post! How novel; proactive advice…….and empathy? Sounds like you’re asking a bit much from much of this crowd. There really has been some great advice in this thread, it sucks that it’s being overshadowed by this blanket condemnation….telling the OP that his wife is a horrible person and confirming what he already knows (smoking = bad) doesn’t help the situation at all. I also agree that the OP needs to be more supportive and less dramatic. Chill the fuck out and TALK to your wife…civilly and openly. You’re in this together…butting heads and trying to ‘win’ is going to make it all worse.
TravisTheSky offers some great advice as well. I hope people in this thread would take ALL of that advice before passing judgement. Cause smoking is not the only common habit that can detrimentally affect a babies’ health. It’s just the easiest one to condemn. Whatever makes a person feel better about themselves, right? I’d be willing to bet that a good chunk of the people that cast judgement on smokers are obese fast food junkies, or pop anti-depressants like candy, or have some other vice that is more socially acceptable, yet just as harmful. But hey, fuck those leper smokers and their baby abusing ways. :roll:
That’s some great advice ziggy, I’m sure they never thought of that....You probably walk around telling homeless people to get jobs too, don't ya? tough love, right? :roll:
You’re a fucking douche bag. Not that I advocate calling people names by any means.
Ironically, if she knows how much it stresses the op (which she must do), that would put MORE pressure and stress on her to quit.. which would make it almost impossible.
OP if you smother her with kindness, I guarantee that will make her feel 10x more guilty than ANY lecture you could imagine. Smoking is generally a result of boredom/stress... take away these factors and it makes it much easier to give up.
She may well be thinking 'why should I make MY pregnancy easier on HIM?'. Are you being supportive or are you constantly nagging? Please consider this!
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
Not sure how you point out that stress is not simply an excuse that smoking moms use -- I'm pretty sure that's exactly what it is.
I'm not preachy either though on a message board I may come across that way -- I really couldn't care less if people smoke regularly (pregnant or otherwise).
I never claimed to understand the addiction -- in fact from my experience I would say that the addiction is bullshit -- another excuse to justify regular smoking. Not sure why people don't just admit that they smoke because they like to. I'm also not even a weekend smoker -- I'm much lighter than that -- I enjoy a couple of smokes maybe once or twice a year.
I've heard that stress during a pregnancy can result in a colicky baby.
I hope it's not true because otherwise I'm in store for some serious misery after my baby is born.
next time you might want to elaborate at the time to avoid misinterpretation.
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
Bet she'd fucking go off her head if someone did that...........yet it's not far different from what she's doing now!
★ 2009 - Sydney, Brisbane, Auckland, Christchurch ★
★ 2011 - EV Newcastle, Melbourne 1, Melbourne 2 ★
man, I hated smoking for most of the 20-some years I did it...I really did. I just hated the feeling of trying to quit more. It's really, really hard to quit when it's a near life long habit. But If you don't believe in addiction, I guess there is no convincing you of that.
Settle down....
★ 2009 - Sydney, Brisbane, Auckland, Christchurch ★
★ 2011 - EV Newcastle, Melbourne 1, Melbourne 2 ★
smoking in the house is a VERY bad thing. 2nd hand smoke is WORSE than what she's inhaling first-hand.
are you going to be OK with her bouncing JR. on her knee with a cig hanging out of her mouth?
If it's bothering you this much now, I can't imagine how you're going to feel later on. Maybe you should consult with a lawyer and start documenting everything.
I wasn't going to mention it but she's probably just as stressed when she smokes. Some say "the stress of quitting is worse than smoking..." I don't believe it either. I was stressed and felt guilty when I COULD smoke without harming anyone but myself. Which is why, after 22 years of smoking, I finally quit.
2 years on Halloween!!!!!
I said "why do I dislike myself so much? why do I do something that is KNOWN to be nothing but harmful and will most likely kill me?'
you make up a scenario that would never in a million years happen.. he calls you out on your sarcasm and you tell him to settle down! LMAO! You're a peach!
:thumbup:
No I'm not.....I'm an apple!
And I said settle down because where did I say she's a horrible, horrible person who shouldn't be reproducing?!
★ 2009 - Sydney, Brisbane, Auckland, Christchurch ★
★ 2011 - EV Newcastle, Melbourne 1, Melbourne 2 ★
You're right that they probably feel guilty and stressed while smoking...I'm just amazed that some people think that laying a guilt trip on her, and telling her the stress is phony will help her stop doing it. I'm no shrink, but this makes no sense to me.
What are you going to fucking do about it?!
★ 2009 - Sydney, Brisbane, Auckland, Christchurch ★
★ 2011 - EV Newcastle, Melbourne 1, Melbourne 2 ★
Make your life a mission - not an intermission. - Arnold Gasglow