Why do people get jealous?

Heineken Helen · February 2008

elmer wrote:

yay, but "just don't like them" without any good reason? Whats the underlying factor there? Could say their just "not my type of person-(don't mean you specifically) and be done with them.

I'll give you a specific example. There was a friend of my sisters who turned out to be a complete psycho, single white female kinda person towards my sister. She was simply freaky some of the stuff which I won't get into. My sister 'slowly' ditched her... cos this girl seemed to be jealous of everything my sister had and made it her mission to GET all of it... but better! Yet, this girl used to go on about how everyone's jealous of HER :rolleyes: which couldn't be further from the truth.

I have no problem admitting I don't like someone... in fact I never pretend to like someone I don't. BUT if I don't like them there are plenty of reasons... none of them need be underlying... and NONE of them are jealousy

elmer · February 2008

Heineken Helen wrote:

Then there are other people who are fake, say what they think certain people want them to say and what they think certain other people would disagree with. I don't like fake people... it's pretty simple.

Then you have good reason for disliking them.

I can't have a big argument with someone and continue as before usually, though rather than pretending just to keep the peace I'm fine ignoring them totally even if it's in a workplace. It's happened a couple times actually, even going back to the schoolyard there were those who I practically grew up around yet we never exchanged any words cos of some dispute as 8years olds.

mookie9999 · February 2008

dunkman wrote:

thats a daily routine for me

It gets tiresome after awhile, no? I know it does for me!

Rygar · February 2008

dunkman wrote:

wouldnt that interfere with your haircut schedule?

haha, gold by page 2

Heineken Helen · February 2008

elmer wrote:

Then you have good reason for disliking them.

I can't have a big argument with someone and continue as before usually, though rather than pretending just to keep the peace I'm fine ignoring them totally even if it's in a workplace. It's happened a couple times actually, even going back to the schoolyard there were those who I practically grew up around yet we never exchanged any words cos of some dispute as 8years olds.

oh yes, I don't just dislike people for no reason... sorry if I gave that impression. I meant that, instead of telling themselves that they're disliked because people are jealous, perhaps they should think twice about that. People who 'have it all' are usually quite popular

whether it's the literal or the emotional 'have it all'. So if you're generally unpopular, it's not cos people are jealous... I can't tell ya why it is without knowing ya but maybe you should look into it.

I generally need a cooling off period to ignore somebody when I'm mad at them... but I always come around... sometimes the length of time differs though

but I rarely fall out with someone because of one argument... it usually takes a good bit for me to write somebody off... but when I DO write them off, there's no going back.

small town beck · February 2008

Heineken Helen wrote:

Becks is already well loved... if you're talking about the OTHER kind of love... no doubt about it. She's fantastic : )

Ahhh thanks

Very sweet of you to say.

elmer · February 2008

Heineken Helen wrote:

So if you're generally unpopular, it's not cos people are jealous... I can't tell ya why it is without knowing ya but maybe you should look into it.

nah, I wasn't stating that I have any issues relating to this topic. Think my clashes with people aren't much different from the norm.

Although If I am generally unpopular, it's gotta be jealousy!! Nope, it's gotta be!!

Heineken Helen · February 2008

elmer wrote:

nah, I wasn't stating that I have any issues relating to this topic. Think my clashes with people aren't much different from the norm.

Although If I am generally unpopular, it's gotta be jealousy!! Nope, it's gotta be!!

hahahaha... of course it is

JaneNY · February 2008

Without reading all the other responses, I think jealousy can come in when someone feels that the other person isn't really entitled to what they have, or that the one who is jealous is 'just as good' as the other person, so why don't they have the same thing. However those feelings are perceptions and not necessarily based on reality.

Dustin51 · February 2008

Without reading all responses...I think its biological. We all get jealous. Some of us just handle it better than others.

SENROCK · February 2008

Heineken Helen wrote:

Then there are other people who are fake, say what they think certain people want them to say and what they think certain other people would disagree with. I don't like fake people... it's pretty simple.

dammit helen. this is why i dig you! im in full on AGREEANCE!!!!

Heineken Helen · February 2008

SENROCK! wrote:

dammit helen. this is why i dig you! im in full on AGREEANCE!!!!

well I knew YOU would!

It's a big problem I have with people. How can you be friends with someone if you're not sure they're being themselves or if everything they say is what they think you want to hear. I'll never understand why some people just can't be themselves... and always look for approval. If you live your life that way, you'll never be happy :(

Odin · February 2008

in_hiding79 wrote:

Makes good sense actually!

There's no way you read that entire post and responded in one minute. Nice try.

in_hiding79 · February 2008

Odin wrote:

There's no way you read that entire post and responded in one minute. Nice try.

Umm, it isn't really hard there dude...:)

Jeanie · February 2008

Dustin51 wrote:

Without reading all responses...I think its biological. We all get jealous. Some of us just handle it better than others.

I'd agree with that. It's one of a range of human emotions that we all have. Some emotions are more prevelent in some people than in others and yes some people do handle their negative emotions better than others.

I just cannot imagine EVERYONE ALWAYS going through their lives and NEVER EVER feeling a pang of jealousy. But then I can't understand people getting stuck in their jealousy either and making it their only reason to get up in the morning.

rarghrargh-brownstar · February 2008

in_hiding79 wrote:

Seriously, I was brought up to NEVER to be jealous of anyone...I guess my mom and dad wanted their kids to know that no one is better then us and that we are not better then anyone! Although some people get jealous of someone and to tell you the truth, I only get jealous of people who win the lottery....I don't wish I were someone else EVER, but I do wish I could win some big money. It sure would be nice..

edit: sorry everyone, it was so nice and quiet last night. I thought I'd just be the rambling crazy Aunt that no one listens to. Thats what I try to go for sometimes. :rolleyes: Its not a big deal...its just the responsibility you feel when someone talks behind others backs. They can say whatever they want about me. but its still frustrating when youve been there for them and helped them with their crap. wtf?

why did i waste my time??... God I feel like I am in JHigh over here. didnt mean to be petty....how do you deal with this stuff online?

I appreciate the concern.

Thank-you.

also, good lord. not jelous of me. probably about the other (their "close" online jamperson friends) they talk crap about. I think i just needed a place to vent really. Sorry for being silly...gotta get back to work. Have a good Friday all. :cool:

in_hiding79 · February 2008

rarghrargh-brownstar wrote:

"I only get jealous of people who win the lottery."

you are you so cute! your parents seem cool to have acknowledged this. compare yourself to yourself- maybe it really IS that easy.

I dont feel like getting into complexities about control issues and insecurity- I'll just let someone more intelligent write about that. I aint jelous of the supersmartypants.

And stop the GOSSIP. Seriously....this is a message board, so we're pretty much all equal. This goes out to no one in particular *cough coug I dont mean to be negative, but there really is no need for that- there's greater crap going on in the world. edit: I just assumed this type of behaviour is tied to jelousy somehow. Just one individual who does this- and its embarassing. I hope they find the need to stop. check the want ads or go and volunteer.

I really need to stop typing when the tv is on, but it helps the flow...happy weekend all. some may say jelousy is natural, but I dont think that means it cant be controlled? ( I mean actions of course)...does anyone else watch intense tv plot-lines while typing crap on here? I could give my full attention out of respect- but then I would have NO time here. Cant have that... :rolleyes:

Happy Weekend again, though. :cool: I didnt get a chance to read what everyone else wrote btw. I am sure there must be some interesting responses- as always.

Sometimes I leave the laptop on this page and when it seems I'm online I'm actually not!! Most of the time I watch TV while online though!!

Did that make any sense? Have a good weekend too!!

TrixieCat · February 2008

rarghrargh-brownstar wrote:

"I only get jealous of people who win the lottery."

you are you so cute! your parents seem cool to have acknowledged this. compare yourself to yourself- maybe it really IS that easy.

I dont feel like getting into complexities about control issues and insecurity- I'll just let someone more intelligent write about that. I aint jelous of the supersmartypants.

And stop the GOSSIP. Seriously....this is a message board, so we're pretty much all equal. This goes out to no one in particular *cough cough* I dont mean to be negative, but there really is no need for that- there's greater crap going on in the world. edit: I just assumed this type of behaviour is tied to jelousy somehow. Just one individual who does this- and its embarassing. I hope they find the need to stop. check the want ads or go and volunteer.

I really need to stop typing when the tv is on, but it helps the flow...happy weekend all. some may say jelousy is natural, but I dont think that means it cant be controlled? ( I mean actions of course)...does anyone else watch intense tv plot-lines while typing crap on here? I could give my full attention out of respect- but then I would have NO time here. Cant have that... :rolleyes:

Happy Weekend again, though. :cool: I didnt get a chance to read what everyone else wrote btw. I am sure there must be some interesting responses- as always.

Check the want ads or go volunteer....rotflmao

I am pretty shocked someone is having a go at you...you have got to be the friendliest person here. Me on the other hand...maybe I have something they want. I am sorry you are being gossiped about. But you know, you are awesome.

Heineken Helen · February 2008

TrixieCat wrote:

Check the want ads or go volunteer....rotflmao

I am pretty shocked someone is having a go at you...you have got to be the friendliest person here. Me on the other hand...maybe I have something they want. I am sorry you are being gossiped about. But you know, you are awesome.

something who wants? :(

Do you get people being jealous too?

TrixieCat · February 2008

Heineken Helen wrote:

something who wants? :(

Do you get people being jealous too?

This is not an "I am soooo popular people are sooooo jealous of me" whine. It really isn't. I promise. I know my shit stinks and I am not everyone's cup of tea. I just wish people that don't know me would leave me alone. You know?
People that are just snarky and mean and you want to give a Glasgow kiss to.

I am sure you get it alot..you know everyone. You seem to be well liked here and people go out on a limb for you. I am sure you have been the victim of a drive by jealousy streak.

Why do people get jealous?

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