how do you find yourself?

chadwick

LUV2ROCK wrote:

Listen to lots of STRYPER

yikes...runs run and run
or

stomping a hole in your speakers will help you find yourself

acoustic guy

Everytime I find myself, I run away again.
My whole life is hide and go seek with myself.
Sorry, just trying to lighten this place up a little

CHANGEinWAVES

acoustic guy wrote:

Everytime I find myself, I run away again.
My whole life is hide and go seek with myself.
Sorry, just trying to lighten this place up a little

I think I've been avoiding myself maybe cause I just don't like me:)

Or maybe I've found myself and everyone I'm with just haven't found themselves!

comebackwoman

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

I think I've been avoiding myself maybe cause I just don't like me:)

Or maybe I've found myself and everyone I'm with just haven't found themselves!

you don't like you? or you don't like the you that you've seen reflected in your ex's eyes? In which case all you have to do is start using a different mirror

Indian Summer

It's a state of mind. When you're comfortable in your own skin, not afraid to be yourself.

CHANGEinWAVES

Indian Summer wrote:

It's a state of mind. When you're comfortable in your own skin, not afraid to be yourself.

i've never been afraid to be myself...it seems as though others are afraid to accept me for myself.

Indian Summer

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

i've never been afraid to be myself...it seems as though others are afraid to accept me for myself.

You say you're not afraid, but do you really know what its like? When I was younger I used to say stuff like "I don't care what anyone thinks about me".....but it wasn't until the past few years that I found out that I'm just now not caring what others think of me.

There's more to it than that too. It's about knowing what you want out of life. Once you know that, you're "found yourself".

CHANGEinWAVES

Indian Summer wrote:

You say you're not afraid, but do you really know what its like? When I was younger I used to say stuff like "I don't care what anyone thinks about me".....but it wasn't until the past few years that I found out that I'm just now not caring what others think of me.

There's more to it than that too. It's about knowing what you want out of life. Once you know that, you're "found yourself".

ok that's fair enough. i see your point.

writersu

Indian Summer wrote:

You say you're not afraid, but do you really know what its like? When I was younger I used to say stuff like "I don't care what anyone thinks about me".....but it wasn't until the past few years that I found out that I'm just now not caring what others think of me.

There's more to it than that too. It's about knowing what you want out of life. Once you know that, you're "found yourself".

I know I teeter back and forth here, so I have a journey yet to go to as well, but you know, I think that if we live by our own values and virtues, then that is a good start on truly believing in ourselves. When I look back, I find the times I most hated me was when I was just doing what others thought right, not exactly right maybe but controlling and not really fair.

CHANGEinWAVES

writersu wrote:

When I look back, I find the times I most hated me was when I was just doing what others thought right, not exactly right maybe but controlling and not really fair.

i can see these moments in my life as well...there are more of them then i'm proud to admit.

writersu

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

That's the thing...I don't feel like I settled. Everything I've done I've wanted...but it was taken from me.the reality I see and the reality I live are 2 different things. Neither what I want, but more so what was forced upon me.

right there with you dear. I know, believe me I know. But it is weird when
you see that you have people in your life that truly like you and those who are suppose to be the key people in your life are not very supportive at all, i.e., spouse, family etc.
it kind of makes you wonder if the key people are really the right ones to give that power to.
that is a power I have given over as well as you have and it sounds easy and it is not, I know, but to take that power back is a step in the right direction.

you know?

CHANGEinWAVES

writersu wrote:

right there with you dear. I know, believe me I know. But it is weird when
you see that you have people in your life that truly like you and those who are suppose to be the key people in your life are not very supportive at all, i.e., spouse, family etc.
it kind of makes you wonder if the key people are really the right ones to give that power to.
that is a power I have given over as well as you have and it sounds easy and it is not, I know, but to take that power back is a step in the right direction.

you know?

i know....i just don't know how...i seem to always give that power over. I have to learn how to keep it for myself.

writersu

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

i can see these moments in my life as well...there are more of them then i'm proud to admit.

yeah, but you know we will never ever change unless the things that are triggering the changes are so damn uncomfortable that we take all we have in ourselves and make it happen.
even bad things get comfortable because they are easy.
I once described being depressed to someone as laying on this big comfortable couch that just is familar and you go back to it because as much as it stinks, it is familiar.

CHANGEinWAVES

writersu wrote:

yeah, but you know we will never ever change unless the things that are triggering the changes are so damn uncomfortable that we take all we have in ourselves and make it happen.
even bad things get comfortable because they are easy.
I once described being depressed to someone as laying on this big comfortable couch that just is familar and you go back to it because as much as it stinks, it is familiar.

i understand this....i actually missed my "husband" this week, after all he's done to me....but only because i was sick and upset...and wanted something familiar.

writersu

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

i understand this....i actually missed my "husband" this week, after all he's done to me....but only because i was sick and upset...and wanted something familiar.

yes, and a bad relationship is like a bad parental relationship; we keep going back thinking; maybe they will be nice to me now.......

in al-anon they said the definition of insanity is when you keep doing the same thing and expecting new results. that is about the best thing I learned from them, other than, "why am I going to meetings to learn to adjust to this fucked up person?"
didn't like the concept although the people were sweet.

CHANGEinWAVES

writersu wrote:

yes, and a bad relationship is like a bad parental relationship; we keep going back thinking; maybe they will be nice to me now.......

in al-anon they said the definition of insanity is when you keep doing the same thing and expecting new results. that is about the best thing I learned from them, other than, "why am I going to meetings to learn to adjust to this fucked up person?"
didn't like the concept although the people were sweet.

i did one al-anon meeting....never went back. I've found more comfort and support on here, and less judgement.

writersu

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

i did one al-anon meeting....never went back. I've found more comfort and support on here, and less judgement.

yeah, I kind of resented learning how to train myself to fit in the alcoholic's life. it was a bit too much even for me. hey we got that much going for us; we knew that was a bit of bs.

CHANGEinWAVES

writersu wrote:

yeah, I kind of resented learning how to train myself to fit in the alcoholic's life. it was a bit too much even for me. hey we got that much going for us; we knew that was a bit of bs.

i appreciated what they were saying but it was an odd situation for me since he had left me...i felt they couldn't relate.

writersu

CHANGEinWAVES wrote:

i appreciated what they were saying but it was an odd situation for me since he had left me...i felt they couldn't relate.

wow, he left you........that blows. maybe he figured you were no easy mark any longer?

CHANGEinWAVES

writersu wrote:

wow, he left you........that blows. maybe he figured you were no easy mark any longer?

he blames me for the drugs...says being with me makes him want to use...talk about making someone feel shitty!