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I'm thinking about buying a cannon

harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
edited February 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
What does everyone think? One of the ones they have at the top of Windsor Castle.. then I can pistol whip anyone who crosses my path.. and PJ haters.
'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

- the great Sir Leo Harrison
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • Brain of J.LoBrain of J.Lo Posts: 3,259
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    What does everyone think? One of the ones they have at the top of Windsor Castle.. then I can pistol whip anyone who crosses my path.. and PJ haters.

    I think it's a great idea. Canons don't kill people. People kill people.
  • brainofPJbrainofPJ Posts: 2,361
    haha, pistol whip with a cannon....cannon whip.

    or could launch junk at your neighbors house...


    Esther's here and she's sick?

    hi Esther, now we are all going to be sick, thanks
  • urbanhippieurbanhippie Posts: 3,007
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    What does everyone think? One of the ones they have at the top of Windsor Castle.. then I can pistol whip anyone who crosses my path.. and PJ haters.
    Is that a cannon in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me? ;)
    A human being that was given to fly.

    Wembley 18/06/07

    If there was a reason, it was you.

    O2 Arena 18/09/09
  • pjoasisrulepjoasisrule Posts: 3,412
    Lmao
    Alpine Valley 2000
    Summerfest 2006

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  • drtyfrnk29drtyfrnk29 Posts: 846
    You bastard. You beat me to it. I was gonna start one entitled

    Thinking of buying some C-4

    Oh, how I will miss days like today on here
    I'm so dangerous I smoke dynamite.

  • tybirdtybird Posts: 17,388
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    What does everyone think? One of the ones they have at the top of Windsor Castle.. then I can pistol whip anyone who crosses my path.. and PJ haters.
    If you can pistol whip someone with a cannon....why do you need the cannon??? Distance??? :D
    All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a thousand enemies, and whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you, digger, listener, runner, prince with the swift warning. Be cunning and full of tricks and your people shall never be destroyed.
  • mookie9999mookie9999 Posts: 4,677
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    What does everyone think? One of the ones they have at the top of Windsor Castle.. then I can pistol whip anyone who crosses my path.. and PJ haters.

    I think it's a grand idea! There is an inactive cannon that could be restored stationed at Governor's Island which is just south of Manhattan. It is pointed directly at the ilsand of Manhattan. The island is only accessible in the summer, I'm sure I could arrange a deal where you could take posession in the winter months. Let me know if you're interested.
    "The leads are weak!"

    "The leads are weak? Fuckin' leads are weak? You're Weak! I've Been in this business 15 years"

    "What's your name?"

    "FUCK YOU! THAT"S MY NAME!"
  • GraySaturdayGraySaturday Posts: 2,878
    I love a man with a cannon.. ;)

    Even better when its a massive cannon.. get a massive cannon to make the ladies swoon
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    What does everyone think? One of the ones they have at the top of Windsor Castle.. then I can pistol whip anyone who crosses my path.. and PJ haters.

    You are much more of a bad-ass than I was led to believe if you can pistol whip someone with a cannon.
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    mookie9999 wrote:
    I think it's a grand idea! There is an inactive cannon that could be restored stationed at Governor's Island which is just south of Manhattan. It is pointed directly at the ilsand of Manhattan. The island is only accessible in the summer, I'm sure I could arrange a deal where you could take posession in the winter months. Let me know if you're interested.

    Fuck yeah.... Can we cover it up with PJ posters?
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • drtyfrnk29drtyfrnk29 Posts: 846
    GraySaturday wrote:
    I love a man with a cannon.. ;)
    Like Dan Marino?
    I'm so dangerous I smoke dynamite.

  • Vedderlution_BabyVedderlution_Baby Posts: 2,535
    Dudes, I'm fucking telling you go to http://listverse.com/crime/25-methods-for-killing-with-your-bare-hands/

    Anyone can blowed someone up. Or pistol whip them with a cannon but takin em down with your bare hands! That's living. And be honest, you gotta be tired of all the "Well this dude broke into my house so I loaded up the 12-pounder Napoleon and blewed him away". Now a "Then i made him a Russian Omelet"...that's a fucking story.
  • harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    eyedclaar wrote:
    You are much more of a bad-ass than I was led to believe if you can pistol whip someone with a cannon.

    Who led you to believe that I wasn't bad-ass? They're the first person who will be pistol whipped.
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Posts: 12,223
    Humpty Dumpty was a cannon used to defend St Mary's at the Wall, a Cavalier stronghold, from the Roundhead siege of Colchester. The Roundheads blasted the Wall sometime in July 1648, and the cannon fell. All the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't put humpty together again.

    What do you want one of those fakkers for? They break like dogshit in a heatwave.
  • harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    FinsburyParkCarrots wrote:
    Humpty Dumpty was a cannon used to defend St Mary's at the Wall, a Cavalier stronghold, from the Roundhead siege of Colchester. The Roundheads blasted the Wall sometime in July 1648, and the cannon fell. All the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't put humpty together again.

    What do you want one of those fakkers for? They break like dogshit in a heatwave.

    I haven't laughed at a post that hard all day. Thanks. :D It was masterful.
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • Vedderlution_BabyVedderlution_Baby Posts: 2,535
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    Who led you to believe that I wasn't bad-ass? They're the first person who will be pistol whipped.


    Dude, epiphany about the cannon.
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    A machine gun would be fine. How are you going to keep a cannon in your bedside drawer? (Or a machine gun). :confused::p
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    Who led you to believe that I wasn't bad-ass? They're the first person who will be pistol whipped.

    After seeing you slam dunk the moon through the rings round Saturn, I certainly never doubted your abiliy to pistol whip someone with a cannon. I think it was Dunk or Mookie...
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

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  • normnorm Posts: 31,146
    you do mean this, right? :p:D
  • harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    MattCameronKicksButt wrote:
    A machine gun would be fine. How are you going to keep a cannon in your bedside drawer? (Or a machine gun). :confused::p

    Noooo don't be silly, you can't put a cannon in a drawer. :rolleyes:

    I'm gonna put it on my wheelchair.
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • tybirdtybird Posts: 17,388
    cutback wrote:
    you do mean this, right? :p:D
    Zing!!!!!!
    All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a thousand enemies, and whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you, digger, listener, runner, prince with the swift warning. Be cunning and full of tricks and your people shall never be destroyed.
  • harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    OK... so from now on, the rest of the thread is dedicated to jokes about pistol whipping with a cannon. Get it out of your fucking systems. :D
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • MattCameronKicksButtMattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    Noooo don't be silly, you can't put a cannon in a drawer. :rolleyes:

    I'm gonna put it on my wheelchair.

    Now THAT'S a good idea! I'm sorry I misunderstood. ;)
  • Vedderlution_BabyVedderlution_Baby Posts: 2,535
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    Noooo don't be silly, you can't put a cannon in a drawer. :rolleyes:

    I'm gonna put it on my wheelchair.


    Dude, if you put that fucking cannon on your wheelchair that would the most badass fucking thing fucking ever. You could get around to place is NO TIME. just aim the cannon the opposite direction you want to go, put on your helmet and earplugs (if you're a pussy) and FIRE! Bam! You're fucking there!
  • urbanhippieurbanhippie Posts: 3,007
    Vedderlution_Baby! wrote:
    Dude, if you put that fucking cannon on your wheelchair that would the most badass fucking thing fucking ever. You could get around to place is NO TIME. just aim the cannon the opposite direction you want to go, put on your helmet and earplugs (if you're a pussy) and FIRE! Bam! You're fucking there!
    LMFAO :D
    A human being that was given to fly.

    Wembley 18/06/07

    If there was a reason, it was you.

    O2 Arena 18/09/09
  • harmless_little_f***harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    My new advertising slogan:

    Harmless: the most badass fucking thing fucking ever
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • tybirdtybird Posts: 17,388
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    My new advertising slogan:

    Harmless: the most badass fucking thing fucking ever
    Shouldn't you add ", bitch!!" to the end of the slogan????
    All the world will be your enemy, Prince with a thousand enemies, and whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you, digger, listener, runner, prince with the swift warning. Be cunning and full of tricks and your people shall never be destroyed.
  • Vedderlution_BabyVedderlution_Baby Posts: 2,535
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    My new advertising slogan:

    Harmless: the most badass fucking thing fucking ever


    I swear I'm adding that to my sig right now.
  • failedpersephonefailedpersephone Posts: 3,424
    FinsburyParkCarrots wrote:
    Humpty Dumpty was a cannon used to defend St Mary's at the Wall, a Cavalier stronghold, from the Roundhead siege of Colchester. The Roundheads blasted the Wall sometime in July 1648, and the cannon fell. All the King's horses and all the King's men couldn't put humpty together again.

    What do you want one of those fakkers for? They break like dogshit in a heatwave.
    this made me laugh.

    thank you.
    IF YOU WANT A PLATE OF MY BEEF SWELLINGTON, YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE COVERCHARGE.
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    harmless_little_f*** wrote:
    My new advertising slogan:

    Harmless: the most badass fucking thing fucking ever

    Ha! You may want to adopt a song my band wrote for your theme music. It was called, "Fuck All You MotherFuckin' Fuckers." Yeah, it was written for the children of the world, but you are welcome to it.
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

    Please Support My Writing Habit By Purchasing A Book:

    https://www.createspace.com/3437020

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