TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
Stars walk the red carpet because they're famous - I walk the toilet paper because im the shit.
Chuck Norris lives in California.........goddammit :mad:
May you all have rectal exams performed by a doctor with hands large enough to palm the Earth.
Here's our first Southener.
Cory, thankyou for having the sense of humour we thought you guys would have!! Champion you get first dibs at getting us back.
and I just realized, that Aussies get shit hung on them all the time... we dont really care, but where and who does most of it come from? We must nail those motherfuckers with a top 10.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. for the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have fucking Electricity down there.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. for the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have fucking Electricity down there.
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH[\b]
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. for the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have fucking Electricity down there.
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible North/South border.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
just trying to keep this moving along 100 is toooo much!
*Official Marker in the Sand Fan Club Junkie*
Member # 0004
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead
decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter
he grew a beard.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
I like our socks. I hear we make a fine sock. I always say, You might not love our records, but I think you'll like our socks. - Stoney G.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
66. While rocking back and forth on the porch, Ma and Pa heard that Ed was going to bring a case of wine, and not the Spirit of the South - Jack Daniels. They re-loaded their shotguns, and wait.....
Stars walk the red carpet because they're famous - I walk the toilet paper because im the shit.
You Aussies are becoming my favorite people on here. You're currently edging out my former favorites......Bostonians. But let's face it, their accent is weird;)
TOP 100 REASONS WHY PEARL JAM DIDN'T PLAY THE SOUTH
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
66. While rocking back and forth on the porch, Ma and Pa heard that Ed was going to bring a case of wine, and not the Spirit of the South - Jack Daniels. They re-loaded their shotguns, and wait.....
67. Frankly my dears.... They don't give a damn!!
You Aussies are becoming my favorite people on here. You're currently edging out my former favorites......Bostonians. But let's face it, their accent is weird;)
awww shucks Cor...
their accent is weird? You have heard us talk havent you!!
Comments
May you all have rectal exams performed by a doctor with hands large enough to palm the Earth.
Why would you start was has no end?
"She fell funny"
"Klaus Daimler, 40, engineer, calm, collected, German"
We move at a different pace down here. And some of us have to keep our vermin extermination blog updated with our colossal failures.
Cute thread though. If it were a person, I would have kicked it in the neck long ago.
Why would you start was has no end?
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
Here's our first Southener.
Cory, thankyou for having the sense of humour we thought you guys would have!! Champion
and I just realized, that Aussies get shit hung on them all the time... we dont really care, but where and who does most of it come from? We must nail those motherfuckers with a top 10.
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. for the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have fucking Electricity down there.
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. for the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have fucking Electricity down there.
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. for the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have fucking Electricity down there.
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted.
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible North/South border.
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
just trying to keep this moving along 100 is toooo much!
Member # 0004
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead
decided to punch his way out of his mother's womb. Shortly thereafter
he grew a beard.
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
we'll be there before we know it!!!
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
http://www.myspace.com/ozbeachbum
7/11/06 - Sydney 1
18/11/06 - Sydney 3
19/11/06 - Newcastle Baby!
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
Why would you start was has no end?
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
66. While rocking back and forth on the porch, Ma and Pa heard that Ed was going to bring a case of wine, and not the Spirit of the South - Jack Daniels. They re-loaded their shotguns, and wait.....
GO CORY!!!!
You Aussies are becoming my favorite people on here. You're currently edging out my former favorites......Bostonians. But let's face it, their accent is weird;)
Why would you start was has no end?
1. Ed prefers wine rather than moonshine
2. Just Because .....
3. They thought "The South" meant "The Southern Hemisphere" so they went to Australia instead
4. 'Cos he dunna likey dayut Bush Feller.. *Cleatus laugh*
5. Pearl Jam are against the dirty art of in-breeding
6. Because Ed, Stone, Jeff and Mike don't know how to play the Banjo yet
7. No venue carparks were big enough to accommodate all the trailers
8. Pearl Jam saw the Pauly Shore Movie.. Son in Law, and were afraid they'd be attacked by "Inbreeeeders" with pitch forks!
9. Because they don't like Grits
10. The South blows!
11. Pearl Jam DID play there but those darn southern yokels couldn't read the announcement
12. The boys had to wrestle Jethro from the Beverly Hillbillies before they could even book a venue... They declined!
13. They had communication problems with venue managers as they couldnt understand what they were saying except for every second word being 'like'
14. They saw that old movie where the man was made to get down on all fours and squeal like a pig and it terrified them
15. They couldn't take their loved ones to the concerts as the venues had a 'no animal policy' so there was a lack of demand
16. "My Name is Earl" does not rate high in all the other US states so Pearl Jam made their decision based on that
17. Pearl Jam wouldn't allow those with two heads to be facilitated on the 1 ticket, and unfortunately those people couldn't afford 2 tickets on their welfare payouts
18. They are waiting untill they release their "Crunk" album next year.
19. Ed wants to teach himself to play the washboard while blowing into the harmonica first
20. The South wants no part in the preservation of Mr. Leatherback's family
21. Because the south think 'conservation' is all about the art of making jam/jelly
22. The South was billed to be on the 1st Leg of the US tour but the locals thought that because it was on Leg 1, then only amputees could attend, so demand wasn't sufficient enough to play
23. dont even get me started.....
24. They wanted to see how many reasons we could come up with before admin stepped in
25. Because they absolutely hate petitions to play in places
26. 'Cos Mike's moisturising cream melts in their climate
27. Because the humidity turns Ed and Boom's hair turn into afros
28. Stone may get mistaken for a wild animal during his duck walk and may be hunted
29. They felt they did their part by playing at the Hurricane Katrina Benefit so in their eyes they didn't owe The South anything
30. Because after the Bush Mask fiasco in 2003 Ed was told he wouldn't be allowed to wear his Ku Klux Klan suit
31. Because there's shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo, pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried, there's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.
32. Because the band were disappointed after learning that their idol Britney Spears is a product of Louisiana trailer trash
33. They realised that their hillbilly rock wasn't quite up to par
34. Because they are waiting for Road House 3 to be finished and will perform a week at the Double Deuce.
35. It's Stone's fault... he's allergic to being that much closer to the Equator..
36. Because Mike refuses to learn how to play the Fiddle
37. Southern Fried Chicken is very oily and bad for them
38. They were going to tour there so they could meet Colonel Sanders but found out he died in 1980, so they cancelled
39. Ed was informed that a 'mullet' was essential if they were gonna play the south and he wasn't prepared to make that commitment
40. The South wasn't big enough for both Pearl Jam and Chuck Norris
41. Eddie can't wear flannel in that climate
42. Kid Rock has the monopoly on music in The South
43. Because no-one down there can ever spell Mississippi right
44. Mmmm.....Arkansas or Athens? That's a hard choice to make
45. Because Tom Sawyer and Gone With the Wind are both over-rated
46. Intimidated by the live shows of the Drive By Truckers
47. They wern't to happy about serving raccoon on a stick for pre-show munchies
48. They're waiting until Ed grows his beard long enough to look like Billy Gibbons of ZZTop
49. They'd only get Trailer Trash Groupies
50. There are no 10C members as Southerners refused to buy membership as there was no discount for producing their Social Security Cards
51. For the same reason they never play Tasmania, they don't have Electricity down there
52. Because they couldnt get overalls embroided with the Pearl Jam logo ready in time to sell at the merch vans
53. They couldn't find BumFuckIdaho on the map
54. Because Ed's angry baritone does not go well with Gospel music
55. Because they knew if they all didnt stand very still during their set the audience would get excited thinking they were performing 'un-natural acts' with their instruments
56. The tour bus is still in the shop having 'The Duke's of Hazard' Air-Horns fitted
57. Because the band thought "I Wish I Was in Dixie" was the title of a porn movie.
58. The Northern states were all out of Confederate Flags, which are required by law, to be flown from aerials on vehicles before crossing over the invisible Southern border.
59. The band is still pissed about the Civil War
60. They cant let the audience join in the chants because they insist on putting "y'all" in front of every line
61. Because they were fuckin scared!!
62. Because they didnt want their tour stickers to read "Ditch The Drummer - We're Goin Huntin!!!"
63. Because their fan base is too stupid to even play the TOP 10 game right!
64. Because they're too scared of being eaten by giant snakes! http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=244951
65. They wanted to avoid the customary tradition of having to fuck their own sisters.
66. While rocking back and forth on the porch, Ma and Pa heard that Ed was going to bring a case of wine, and not the Spirit of the South - Jack Daniels. They re-loaded their shotguns, and wait.....
67. Frankly my dears.... They don't give a damn!!
awww shucks Cor...
their accent is weird? You have heard us talk havent you!!