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ever do something drunk you really regret?

Jeremy1012Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
edited October 2012 in All Encompassing Trip
This thread is done :)


Lock it someone?
"I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
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  • The ChampThe Champ Posts: 4,063
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    last night I was at a friend's house with her and two other friends. we were having a good time, I'd had a few drinks and usual I was all relaxed and happy with everyone. me and one of my friends were sat on a sofa and were all cuddling and stuff.

    Now I should make it clear that, while I do find her attractive and she is one of my closest friends, she is a no-go. She has been in a relationship with one of my friends for about 2 years. after a while we were getting more drunk (but not so drunk that I wasn't in control of myself) and when the two other friends left the room for a bit we kissed. unfortunately it wasn't just a quick thing we could brush off because it happened several times and I certainly made no attempt to stop it. I was thinking at the time that it was wrong, that I should stop and just make a joke out of it (and to be honest it was just a bit of fun between close friends).

    This morning (I slept alone by the way :D) things were a little awkward which I later found out was because she was feeling guilty about her boyfriend. Both of us are well aware that it meant nothing and we are just good friends who are comfortable in each others company. however, she felt that she had to tell her boyfriend what happened. she told a variation of the truth that made it seem like an accident and he accepted it now. the thing is, I like the guy a lot and even though it was just a kiss and meant nothing, I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eye from now on knowing that we are both kind of lying to him. at the same time, I can't now tell the actual truth because that will make it seem like it was a big enough deal to have to cover it up. I don't really know what to do. any advice?

    No big deal buddy. Find yourself a girlfriend and stop kissing someone else's..
    'I want to hurry home to you
    put on a slow, dumb show for you
    and crack you up
    so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
    god I'm very, very frightening
    and I'll overdo it'
  • seagoat2seagoat2 Posts: 241
    Maybe you should apologize to him personally & let him know that it wasn't a big deal to you & that you don't have any designs on his girl....?
  • intodeepintodeep Posts: 7,228
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    last night I was at a friend's house with her and two other friends. we were having a good time, I'd had a few drinks and usual I was all relaxed and happy with everyone. me and one of my friends were sat on a sofa and were all cuddling and stuff.

    Now I should make it clear that, while I do find her attractive and she is one of my closest friends, she is a no-go. She has been in a relationship with one of my friends for about 2 years. after a while we were getting more drunk (but not so drunk that I wasn't in control of myself) and when the two other friends left the room for a bit we kissed. unfortunately it wasn't just a quick thing we could brush off because it happened several times and I certainly made no attempt to stop it. I was thinking at the time that it was wrong, that I should stop and just make a joke out of it (and to be honest it was just a bit of fun between close friends).

    This morning (I slept alone by the way :D) things were a little awkward which I later found out was because she was feeling guilty about her boyfriend. Both of us are well aware that it meant nothing and we are just good friends who are comfortable in each others company. however, she felt that she had to tell her boyfriend what happened. she told a variation of the truth that made it seem like an accident and he accepted it now. the thing is, I like the guy a lot and even though it was just a kiss and meant nothing, I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eye from now on knowing that we are both kind of lying to him. at the same time, I can't now tell the actual truth because that will make it seem like it was a big enough deal to have to cover it up. I don't really know what to do. any advice?

    That sucks. I was in a similar situation but i cut it off before we kissed thankfully.

    don't know what to tell ya man that is tough. In my situation we never talked about it and pretended like it never happened.
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  • Jeremy1012Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    The Champ wrote:
    No big deal buddy. Find yourself a girlfriend and stop kissing someone else's..
    thats very helpful. thanks a bunch.

    My lack of a girlfriend was really not a factor in this. it was more being very close to someone and getting into a situation where neither of us was completely in charge of ourselves.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • Jeremy1012Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    seagoat2 wrote:
    Maybe you should apologize to him personally & let him know that it wasn't a big deal to you & that you don't have any designs on his girl....?
    well I told her to say that to him but I think she is just going to leave it as it is... which is fine other than the fact that I DO still feel guilty as hell, not because it meant anything but because they are both important to me and I woud hate to cause any problems between them.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • HawkshoreHawkshore Posts: 2,153
    What is the sense of telling him if she wasn't going to tell the truth???
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  • senninsennin Posts: 2,146
    Hawkshore wrote:
    What is the sense of telling him if she wasn't going to tell the truth???

    damm good question!
  • mdigenakismdigenakis Posts: 1,337
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    last night I was at a friend's house with her and two other friends. we were having a good time, I'd had a few drinks and usual I was all relaxed and happy with everyone. me and one of my friends were sat on a sofa and were all cuddling and stuff.

    Now I should make it clear that, while I do find her attractive and she is one of my closest friends, she is a no-go. She has been in a relationship with one of my friends for about 2 years. after a while we were getting more drunk (but not so drunk that I wasn't in control of myself) and when the two other friends left the room for a bit we kissed. unfortunately it wasn't just a quick thing we could brush off because it happened several times and I certainly made no attempt to stop it. I was thinking at the time that it was wrong, that I should stop and just make a joke out of it (and to be honest it was just a bit of fun between close friends).

    This morning (I slept alone by the way :D) things were a little awkward which I later found out was because she was feeling guilty about her boyfriend. Both of us are well aware that it meant nothing and we are just good friends who are comfortable in each others company. however, she felt that she had to tell her boyfriend what happened. she told a variation of the truth that made it seem like an accident and he accepted it now. the thing is, I like the guy a lot and even though it was just a kiss and meant nothing, I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eye from now on knowing that we are both kind of lying to him. at the same time, I can't now tell the actual truth because that will make it seem like it was a big enough deal to have to cover it up. I don't really know what to do. any advice?

    show this to him^
    he'll be pissed in all likelyhood, but you and your friend are guilt free.
    "Don't let the darkness eat you up..."

    -Greg Dulli

  • Jeremy1012Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    Hawkshore wrote:
    What is the sense of telling him if she wasn't going to tell the truth???
    she thinks that he might be upset by it and since it really meant nothing she thinks it would be stupid to cause problems because of it. she didn't exactly lie to him, just told him that she went to kiss me on the cheek, missed and then, because we were drunk, we kissed.
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • Jeremy1012Jeremy1012 Posts: 7,170
    mdigenakis wrote:
    show this to him^
    he'll be pissed in all likelyhood, but you and your friend are guilt free.
    Well thats absolutely not what I want. I'm not so selfish that I'd rather he was pissed and I had a clear conscience. I brought this on myself. I just wish I'd thought about it :)
    "I remember one night at Muzdalifa with nothing but the sky overhead, I lay awake amid sleeping Muslim brothers and I learned that pilgrims from every land — every colour, and class, and rank; high officials and the beggar alike — all snored in the same language"
  • CJMST3KCJMST3K Posts: 9,722
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    last night I was at a friend's house with her and two other friends. we were having a good time, I'd had a few drinks and usual I was all relaxed and happy with everyone. me and one of my friends were sat on a sofa and were all cuddling and stuff.

    Now I should make it clear that, while I do find her attractive and she is one of my closest friends, she is a no-go. She has been in a relationship with one of my friends for about 2 years. after a while we were getting more drunk (but not so drunk that I wasn't in control of myself) and when the two other friends left the room for a bit we kissed. unfortunately it wasn't just a quick thing we could brush off because it happened several times and I certainly made no attempt to stop it. I was thinking at the time that it was wrong, that I should stop and just make a joke out of it (and to be honest it was just a bit of fun between close friends).

    This morning (I slept alone by the way :D) things were a little awkward which I later found out was because she was feeling guilty about her boyfriend. Both of us are well aware that it meant nothing and we are just good friends who are comfortable in each others company. however, she felt that she had to tell her boyfriend what happened. she told a variation of the truth that made it seem like an accident and he accepted it now. the thing is, I like the guy a lot and even though it was just a kiss and meant nothing, I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eye from now on knowing that we are both kind of lying to him. at the same time, I can't now tell the actual truth because that will make it seem like it was a big enough deal to have to cover it up. I don't really know what to do. any advice?

    Get him a present - like a good $20-$30 present of something he'd really like. When he asks was it's for, say you're feeling really sorry for kissing his girlfriend, and don't know what to do about it. He'll probably understand that you're really trying to make amends, even more than just quick words.
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  • HawkshoreHawkshore Posts: 2,153
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    she thinks that he might be upset by it and since it really meant nothing she thinks it would be stupid to cause problems because of it. she didn't exactly lie to him, just told him that she went to kiss me on the cheek, missed and then, because we were drunk, we kissed.

    See the problem I have with this is if she is not going to tell the truth the only reason to tell him at all is to make herself feel better about it and that is pretty selfish in my book.
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  • soulsingingsoulsinging Posts: 13,202
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    last night I was at a friend's house with her and two other friends. we were having a good time, I'd had a few drinks and usual I was all relaxed and happy with everyone. me and one of my friends were sat on a sofa and were all cuddling and stuff.

    Now I should make it clear that, while I do find her attractive and she is one of my closest friends, she is a no-go. She has been in a relationship with one of my friends for about 2 years. after a while we were getting more drunk (but not so drunk that I wasn't in control of myself) and when the two other friends left the room for a bit we kissed. unfortunately it wasn't just a quick thing we could brush off because it happened several times and I certainly made no attempt to stop it. I was thinking at the time that it was wrong, that I should stop and just make a joke out of it (and to be honest it was just a bit of fun between close friends).

    This morning (I slept alone by the way :D) things were a little awkward which I later found out was because she was feeling guilty about her boyfriend. Both of us are well aware that it meant nothing and we are just good friends who are comfortable in each others company. however, she felt that she had to tell her boyfriend what happened. she told a variation of the truth that made it seem like an accident and he accepted it now. the thing is, I like the guy a lot and even though it was just a kiss and meant nothing, I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eye from now on knowing that we are both kind of lying to him. at the same time, I can't now tell the actual truth because that will make it seem like it was a big enough deal to have to cover it up. I don't really know what to do. any advice?

    how is it not the truth? it sounds like she told him it was harmless and you say it was harmless. it was only a kiss, dont beat yourself up over it.

    new year's eve a few years ago i took some lsd and down about a dozen shots of vodka, all while smoking copius amounts of pot. i had a gf who was out of town. i met a girl at a party, gave her a fake name, took her to my gf's apt so she couldnt find me later, and fucked her on the couch before dropping her back off at the party. i didnt even know her name and i never said a word about it to my gf. this is one of my milder regrets.

    so yeah, we've all done things we regret while wasted. if this is the worst you ever do, consider yourself lucky.
  • mdigenakismdigenakis Posts: 1,337
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    Well thats absolutely not what I want. I'm not so selfish that I'd rather he was pissed and I had a clear conscience. I brought this on myself. I just wish I'd thought about it :)

    It is a selfish act, yes, but it is the best thing to do if your friends with both parties. If there love ( or whereever they are in their relationship) is strong enough then they'll be fine and so will you. If not, then you and your friend fucked up and you probably need to have a little ( and by little i mean long) discussion. But hey what do i know. Good luck though.
    "Don't let the darkness eat you up..."

    -Greg Dulli

  • mca47mca47 Posts: 13,280
    soulsinging wrote:
    how is it not the truth? it sounds like she told him it was harmless and you say it was harmless. it was only a kiss, dont beat yourself up over it.

    new year's eve a few years ago i took some lsd and down about a dozen shots of vodka, all while smoking copius amounts of pot. i had a gf who was out of town. i met a girl at a party, gave her a fake name, took her to my gf's apt so she couldnt find me later, and fucked her on the couch before dropping her back off at the party. i didnt even know her name and i never said a word about it to my gf. this is one of my milder regrets.

    so yeah, we've all done things we regret while wasted. if this is the worst you ever do, consider yourself lucky.


    LOL!!!

    I've had a few stories myself that def. make the kissing story look a bit "tame".

    I might drink too much...but it's all fun! :)
  • FinsburyParkCarrotsFinsburyParkCarrots Posts: 12,223
    Nope, but I regret a lot of the sober shit.
  • EarthgirlEarthgirl Posts: 695
    yes.. I got behind the wheel of my 4x4 truck with my best friend in the passenger seat after I had been out drinking the night before.. this was at 6am.. thought I was sober enough... she was sleeping in the passenger seat.. I fell asleep at the wheel, when I woke up we were heading for a telephone pole... I over corrected the steering wheel and we went off a cliff on the other side of the road.................................... :(
  • mca47mca47 Posts: 13,280
    Earthgirl wrote:
    yes.. I got behind the wheel of my 4x4 truck with my best friend in the passenger seat after I had been out drinking the night before.. this was at 6am.. thought I was sober enough... she was sleeping in the passenger seat.. I fell asleep at the wheel, when I woke up we were heading for a telephone pole... I over corrected the steering wheel and we went off a cliff on the other side of the road.................................... :(

    You went off a cliff? :eek:
    How big was the cliff?
  • CJMST3KCJMST3K Posts: 9,722
    Earthgirl wrote:
    yes.. I got behind the wheel of my 4x4 truck with my best friend in the passenger seat after I had been out drinking the night before.. this was at 6am.. thought I was sober enough... she was sleeping in the passenger seat.. I fell asleep at the wheel, when I woke up we were heading for a telephone pole... I over corrected the steering wheel and we went off a cliff on the other side of the road.................................... :(

    uhhh..... no wink?
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  • The ChampThe Champ Posts: 4,063
    soulsinging wrote:
    new year's eve a few years ago i took some lsd and down about a dozen shots of vodka, all while smoking copius amounts of pot. i had a gf who was out of town. i met a girl at a party, gave her a fake name, took her to my gf's apt so she couldnt find me later, and fucked her on the couch before dropping her back off at the party. i didnt even know her name and i never said a word about it to my gf. this is one of my milder regrets.

    so yeah, we've all done things we regret while wasted. if this is the worst you ever do, consider yourself lucky.

    What I meant by "no big deal buddy"..
    'I want to hurry home to you
    put on a slow, dumb show for you
    and crack you up
    so you can put a blue ribbon on my brain
    god I'm very, very frightening
    and I'll overdo it'
  • taratara Posts: 293
    seagoat2 wrote:
    Maybe you should apologize to him personally & let him know that it wasn't a big deal to you & that you don't have any designs on his girl....?


    NO NO NO!! bad idea, it was a mistake, the bf doesn't need to know, it will needlessly complicate things. you'll start by saying 'it didn't mean anything', and you will be sincere, but how could he not be upset? everyone always talks about honesty being the best policy, but i'm not sure that it is. oh, and i've done the same shit that you did, and i've now made it a rule to never hook up with someone that i know is involved, i know that it's not your responsibility, but it's still on your conscience.

    oh, and was this the girl that got you the cool xmas gift?
    No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it.
    Albert Einstein
  • taratara Posts: 293
    mdigenakis wrote:
    show this to him^
    he'll be pissed in all likelyhood, but you and your friend are guilt free.
    you'll be guilt free, but the bf will be tormented, i think it's now your responsibility to deal with the guilt. you can't expect to kiss someone's gf, AND rid yourself of the guilt, it doesn't work that way.

    on a different note, back 6 yrs ago, i hooked up with this guy that i knew was sort of dating someone ('i'm going to break up with her any day now'), the girl found out, we were at a party, she threw her beer at me, i went home with said guy. we both broke it off with him the next week.

    she is now my best friend, and has been for about 5 years now.
    No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it.
    Albert Einstein
  • coco buttercoco butter Posts: 1,459
    Is she hot? If she is... give him props for having such a hot girl friend and give him a high five! Success!
    Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked... in the head... with an iron boot? Of course you don't, no one does. It never happens. Sorry, Ted, that's a dumb question... skip that.
  • bostonloubostonlou Posts: 2,849
    coco butter wrote:
    Is she hot? If she is... give him props for having such a hot girl friend and give him a high five! Success!
    great post... i don't laugh out loud much :)



    i say

    1) the guy hasn't "accepted" it.... how can you "accidentally" hook up?

    2) he's going to punch you in the face


    so after he punches you... offer him to sniff your finger
    Don't Believe Everything You Think
  • Low_Light03Low_Light03 Posts: 1,227
    I was too drunk to remember to go inside the Forum in LA for Eddie's preset in July. I missed an acoustic version of Porch.


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  • EarthgirlEarthgirl Posts: 695
    mca47 wrote:
    You went off a cliff? :eek:
    How big was the cliff?


    big enough to go end over end about 10x. It was in British Columbia on mountain road... around where I grew up. Kimberley BC... near there.
  • ByrnzieByrnzie Posts: 21,037
    Snog him aswell so that he doesn't feel left out! :cool:
  • taratara Posts: 293
    Earthgirl wrote:
    big enough to go end over end about 10x. It was in British Columbia on mountain road... around where I grew up. Kimberley BC... near there.

    dude, you're the luckiest woman alive. did your friend survive?
    i'm so sorry that happened to you.
    i still have friends who drink and drive, it's one of the few things that gets me in a rage, i asked this guy to promise me he'd never do it again (he's one of those suburban boys in a tricked out car that blasts his stereo to nickleback and other crap), and he said that he couldn't do that. he knows he's going to have to drive home, why does he have to drink, i don't understand what the problem is.
    your case is different though, it's usually safe to assume that you're sober the next day.
    No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it.
    Albert Einstein
  • satansbedbugssatansbedbugs On Tour Posts: 2,412
    Jeremy1012 wrote:
    last night I was at a friend's house with her and two other friends. we were having a good time, I'd had a few drinks and usual I was all relaxed and happy with everyone. me and one of my friends were sat on a sofa and were all cuddling and stuff.

    Now I should make it clear that, while I do find her attractive and she is one of my closest friends, she is a no-go. She has been in a relationship with one of my friends for about 2 years. after a while we were getting more drunk (but not so drunk that I wasn't in control of myself) and when the two other friends left the room for a bit we kissed. unfortunately it wasn't just a quick thing we could brush off because it happened several times and I certainly made no attempt to stop it. I was thinking at the time that it was wrong, that I should stop and just make a joke out of it (and to be honest it was just a bit of fun between close friends).

    This morning (I slept alone by the way :D) things were a little awkward which I later found out was because she was feeling guilty about her boyfriend. Both of us are well aware that it meant nothing and we are just good friends who are comfortable in each others company. however, she felt that she had to tell her boyfriend what happened. she told a variation of the truth that made it seem like an accident and he accepted it now. the thing is, I like the guy a lot and even though it was just a kiss and meant nothing, I don't think I'm going to be able to look him in the eye from now on knowing that we are both kind of lying to him. at the same time, I can't now tell the actual truth because that will make it seem like it was a big enough deal to have to cover it up. I don't really know what to do. any advice?


    I did the same thing only it went all the way to the bedroom. alcohol is the devil.. oh, and her boyfriend never found out. just swept it under the rug...sbb
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  • V VV V Posts: 5,191
    only had a couple of snogs while very drunk with a friend , that was along time ago now ! i'm a good married girl :)
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