Teenagers make me sad!

redrock

GreenTeaDisease wrote:

yeah but these kids are just little. once they get older, some of them will realize that being like auntie isn't what they want for themselves. When I was very little, I only knew about traditional "women's" jobs- I wanted to be a secretary like my mum or a nurse. Once you get exposed to more as you get older, that will change for SOME. It takes a lot of open-mindedness to break out. Those will be the lucky kids.

Absolutely. This is where schools, etc. can help. Obviously it is a lot more difficult for the young person to break through if the support is not there at home. If like HH, all you here is 'that's nice' with nothing else, it's not easy.

Heineken Helen

redrock wrote:

That's the responsibility of all parents and thus the background of the parents make a huge difference as to how the child behaves and perceives the world.

absolutely... although I know many people who found their inspiration elsewhere... a teacher, a family friend, somebody in the community.

wash_

redrock wrote:

I was just about to ask you where you teach? The schools I worked at (and the ones my daughter went to), the majority of the children were from a decent socio-economic class - various cultures and ethnic groups, but largely what the french would call 'bourgeois' families. That does make a difference in aspirations.

I work in low socio economic school. With this comes foreign languages, bad behaviour and laziness. It's hard to have an affect when that's what you're faced with (I exclude children who have English as a second language as their parents have moved to England for a better life and have a decent work ethic).

I do feel that if I worked in a middle class school my opinions would be different. But I still feel thats something is amiss in children these days.

dunkman

GreenTeaDisease wrote:

see dunk, I like you, I don't have any beef...but this attitude isn't being an adult, it is being selfish. You have a lot to offer people outside of your family.

i am selfish... i know that.. and i'm ok with that

redrock

Personally, I think for every crappy teen around, there is a shitload of them with inspiration and drive. Maybe I'm too optimistic, but what I see around me is not that bad at all.

Heineken Helen

redrock wrote:

Absolutely. This is where schools, etc. can help. Obviously it is a lot more difficult for the young person to break through if the support is not there at home. If like HH, all you here is 'that's nice' with nothing else, it's not easy.

there wasn't more support at school either, they just came to simply teach and not inspire. There was one teacher though, who left when I was in third year, who opened my mind to a lot of stuff and I always left his class feeling that the world really was there for the taking . I often wonder if things could be different were he to remain for my final two years.

Heineken Helen

redrock wrote:

Personally, I think for every crappy teen around, there is a shitload of them with inspiration and drive. Maybe I'm too optimistic, but what I see around me is not that bad at all.

that's good though... I suppose the only interaction I seem to have with teens these days is when they're hanging around the shop and asking me to buy cigarettes for them :rolleyes: . I just wanna shake them and somehow inspire them... but how do ya do that? Books? What? We studied to kill a mockingbird, romeo and juliet, the plough and the stars, wuthering heights in school... and, while all great books, none really give you that kick up the arse that makes you wanna just get out there and live.

wash_

dunkman wrote:

my daughter is 6 and she wants to grow up to be a teacher... my youngest is 4 and she wants to be Sonic The Hedgehog... (she even wears wee white gloves all day cos thats what Sonic wears)


to be a shop assistant at TK Max when your aged 7 seems quite cool.. . if that was their job aspirations at aged 14 i'd be concerned... but at age 7 they think its like a scene from a Mary-Kate and Ashley film... girls trying on clothes and puttingon make-up.. at age 7 kids shouldnt be asked what they want to be when they grow up anyway.. why make them think about a fucking job... let them play for a while... the responsibilities come later.. we try and age our kids too soon these days...

I agree that children should focus on being children. It's something that is lacking these days, they want to grow up more quickly. When I was 7 I wanted to be a vet. I wasn't allowed to wear make up till I was at least 12.
Aspirations to be a shop assistant at 7 might be cool but there is a cycle to these things, I hope that they realise they want more for themselves and their future than a shopping mall. Their environment dictates what they will become and if its shopping malls at 7 I doubt it'll change.

surfanddestroy

Heineken Helen wrote:

that's good though... I suppose the only interaction I seem to have with teens these days is when they're hanging around the shop and asking me to buy cigarettes for them :rolleyes: . I just wanna shake them and somehow inspire them... but how do ya do that? Books? What? We studied to kill a mockingbird, romeo and juliet, the plough and the stars, wuthering heights in school... and, while all great books, none really give you that kick up the arse that makes you wanna just get out there and live.

They are young, let them have some fun, they will grow up and learn in their own time.

wash_

Heineken Helen wrote:

that's good though... I suppose the only interaction I seem to have with teens these days is when they're hanging around the shop and asking me to buy cigarettes for them :rolleyes: . I just wanna shake them and somehow inspire them... but how do ya do that? Books? What? We studied to kill a mockingbird, romeo and juliet, the plough and the stars, wuthering heights in school... and, while all great books, none really give you that kick up the arse that makes you wanna just get out there and live.

I say get secondary schools to read Ishmael myself. That book may have flaws but it has a type of urgency and inspiration that could spark in the minds of a 15 year old.

Heineken Helen

surfanddestroy wrote:

They are young, let them have some fun, they will grow up and learn in their own time.

I have to disagree with ya... this is probably the most important time for them (and I don't mean it's the time when they should be pushed... but it's the time when they're mind's the most open to outside influences so we should try and make sure those influences are the best possible)

Heineken Helen

wash_ wrote:

I say get secondary schools to read Ishmael myself. That book may have flaws but it has a type of urgency and inspiration that could spark in the minds of a 15 year old.

I would absolutely 100% agree with you there and it was my first thought when I finished reading the book... why aren't they making kids read this? It's probably wasted on someone of my age but if it got me when I still believed I could make a difference... maybe I could have made a difference

wash_

Heineken Helen wrote:

I would absolutely 100% agree with you there and it was my first thought when I finished reading the book... why aren't they making kids read this? It's probably wasted on someone of my age but if it got me when I still believed I could make a difference... maybe I could have made a difference

That's excatly what I thought when I read it.

redrock wrote:

Personally, I think for every crappy teen around, there is a shitload of them with inspiration and drive. Maybe I'm too optimistic, but what I see around me is not that bad at all.

I believe this too. A fighting hope but a hope nonetheless!!!

soulsinging

gobrowns19 wrote:

I think teenage rebellion starts at adolescence, when you're going through puberty and mood swings as it is. Then it starts. Family, friends of family, every single family member, teachers, tell you what to do, how to act, what do you like, what don't you like, well why don't you know? And it happens, from 12-18, 6 years of people talking to you like you're too young or too old. Fuck, I don't need to wait until i'm 30 to really be able to understand some things. Sure, experience and age brings a lot, but I know at 19, hell i knew at 10 some things that people claim you need to be a parent to know. It's just years and years of 'you're too young to do this but you're old enough to get these responsibilities.' Rebellion comes from just not being able to fucking take it anymore.

Granted I feel i don't 'have' to be as rebellious as I once did, but it feels good to break those chains all the time, even if it's doing something small and stupid to 'fuck' with normal society like wear shorts in winter or a coat in summer. Anything to make people be like 'wow that kid is weird you're not *supposed* to do that.' Why are you *supposed* to do a lot of things? Some things are understandable, but why am I *supposed* to do some things? I'll do whatever it takes to set my self away from those people who think they are *supposed* to spend every minute at work, buy the biggest house, buy the biggest car, and die.

Sure some teens rebel for no reason, but not all of them.

1. i agree we send way too many mixed messages to teens expecting them to act like adults and treating them like kids.

2. that's the lamest rebellion i ever heard dude people don't look at you and think "wow, he's unique and he's really telling the system to fuck itself and i don't think he's supposed to do that!" they're saying "it's 96 degrees and humid as shit and that guy's got a winter coat on... what is he a fucking idiot or something? i'm sweating my balls off just looking at him." if that's what you've got to do to get the validation you need to feel different, you might want to rethink a few things.

3. we are materialistic workaholics. it's quite sick.

gobrowns19

soulsinging wrote:

1. i agree we send way too many mixed messages to teens expecting them to act like adults and treating them like kids.

2. that's the lamest rebellion i ever heard dude people don't look at you and think "wow, he's unique and he's really telling the system to fuck itself and i don't think he's supposed to do that!" they're saying "it's 96 degrees and humid as shit and that guy's got a winter coat on... what is he a fucking idiot or something? i'm sweating my balls off just looking at him." if that's what you've got to do to get the validation you need to feel different, you might want to rethink a few things.

3. we are materialistic workaholics. it's quite sick.

Lol. No i was uh, talking about a friend of mine. No really, I just remember it would be December and some kid would be walking in shorts and my dad would just go crazy and I loved it. I'm too much of a baby and i'm dressed for winter starting at the end of October. And i'm in shorts usually by May too. It was just an example. I need to keep my tough guy appearance going here.

soulsinging

gobrowns19 wrote:

Lol. No i was uh, talking about a friend of mine. No really, I just remember it would be December and some kid would be walking in shorts and my dad would just go crazy and I loved it. I'm too much of a baby and i'm dressed for winter starting at the end of October. And i'm in shorts usually by May too. It was just an example. I need to keep my tough guy appearance going here.

gotcha. i look like the little brother from 'a christmas story' for most of the chicago winter. im told i have the ugliest winter coat they've ever seen by 95% of the people who have ever seen it. 2 girlfriends in a row have begged me to get rid of it, but it's warm as shit. i dont fuck around with my comfort, hehe.

mdigenakis

Heineken Helen wrote:

First sign of independence, they wanna rebel... it comes naturally... cos humans aren't meant to be caged. The poor fuckers don't realise that we (society) will do whatever it takes to brainwash them to our way of thinking and put them in their box... boot camp, military school, therapy, jail... whatever it takes! :mad:

We WILL make the poor fuckers conform to normality. Authority seems to be the only reality these days... and freedom only exists in our minds :( sad sad sad state of affairs.

You would hate my job.

Heineken Helen

mdigenakis wrote:

You would hate my job.

I hate most jobs