Why I will never go to Australia!

Heineken Helen

markymark550 wrote:

Didn't know that it was 8 of the top 10. :eek:

In that case, check your shoes before putting them on and double the amount of spider spray

SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! :cool:

well Jeanie, we'll just have to get you over here

where it IS actually perfectly safe

I bet you know SOMEONE who was killed by a spider or a snake or a crocodile or something

Jeanie

eMMI wrote:

I'm not panicking.

aww, thankies lady.

Can't wait to see you!

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! :cool:

well Jeanie, we'll just have to get you over here

where it IS actually perfectly safe

I bet you know SOMEONE who was killed by a spider or a snake or a crocodile or something

Oh for goodness sake!!!

The only person I know that was killed by a creature was Steve Irwin!!

Of course, I'd love to come over there for a visit, but I'm a bit worried about the leprechauns!!

Not to mention all that scary shit at the airports about how if I leave my bags unattended they'll take them out and explode them! :eek:

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

Oh for goodness sake!!!

The only person I know that was killed by a creature was Steve Irwin!!

Of course, I'd love to come over there for a visit, but I'm a bit worried about the leprechauns!!

Not to mention all that scary shit at the airports about how if I leave my bags unattended they'll take them out and explode them! :eek:

See... you DO know somebody

Ah don't worry about the leprechauns... if you catch them, they have to give you a pot of gold... hardly similar to a spider that can kill ya in 15 minutes :eek:

And just keep your bag ON you and they'll be fine

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

See... you DO know somebody

Ah don't worry about the leprechauns... if you catch them, they have to give you a pot of gold... hardly similar to a spider that can kill ya in 15 minutes :eek:

And just keep your bag ON you and they'll be fine

Oh yeah, I forgot about how Steve used to drop in for a barbie every other weekend!!! :rolleyes:

Well the little people, they only give you gold if they like you don't they?
I've heard they can be scary if they don't!! :eek:

I live 5 minutes from a major hospital, which would have anti venom, not to mention that I'm a qualified 1st Aider, just supposing by some miniscule chance that there was even a poisonous spider in the backyard and it managed to hunt you down and bite you!!

It's not my bag I worry about Hels!!! :eek:
Mine would have to be pried from my fingers by Arnold Schwarzenegger!
It's those other folks with the dodgy bags.

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

Oh yeah, I forgot about how Steve used to drop in for a barbie every other weekend!!! :rolleyes:

Well the little people, they only give you gold if they like you don't they?
I've heard they can be scary if they don't!! :eek:

I live 5 minutes from a major hospital, which would have anti venom, not to mention that I'm a qualified 1st Aider, just supposing by some miniscule chance that there was even a poisonous spider in the backyard and it managed to hunt you down and bite you!!

It's not my bag I worry about Hels!!! :eek:
Mine would have to be pried from my fingers by Arnold Schwarzenegger!
It's those other folks with the dodgy bags.

well isn't it the same in EVERY airport? There's way less security in Dublin airport than in teh UK airports.

The leprechauns will try to con you but if you're clever, you get the money

Well it DID show on the documentary what to do if you're bitten which was clever, by putting a bandage tight around the area... or was that with a snake

catefrances

Jeanie wrote:

Oh for goodness sake!!!

The only person I know that was killed by a creature was Steve Irwin!!

Of course, I'd love to come over there for a visit, but I'm a bit worried about the leprechauns!!

Not to mention all that scary shit at the airports about how if I leave my bags unattended they'll take them out and explode them! :eek:

don't forget jeanie eevry now and again a tourist gets eaten by a crocodile. sharks will take a nibble out of you and in most cases spit you out cause you taste fuuny. or they think you're a seal cause you're stupid enough to wear a black wetsuit. we have those stone fish as well that unsuspecting people step on and die. and those pretty blue ringed octopuses. that are just begging for you to touch them so they can poison you. and then there's the cassowary. shall i go on?

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

well isn't it the same in EVERY airport? There's way less security in Dublin airport than in teh UK airports.

The leprechauns will try to con you but if you're clever, you get the money

Well it DID show on the documentary what to do if you're bitten which was clever, by putting a bandage tight around the area... or was that with a snake

Yeah, probably Hels. It's been a really long time since I was at Heathrow.
And I caught the ferry in and out of Ireland, so never saw your airports.

Hmm....tricky little fellas these leprechauns, might need your help!
I'll split it with ya!!

Yeah, depends on the bite, but pressure bandage and immobilize the area, tends to be the best thing, then seek medical attention.
To be honest, I've NEVER had to use my training for a bite!
What does that tell ya???

Jeanie

catefrances wrote:

don't forget jeanie eevry now and again a tourist gets eaten by a crocodile. sharks will take a nibble out of you and in most cases spit you out cause you taste fuuny. or they think you're a seal cause you're stupid enough to wear a black wetsuit. we have those stone fish as well that unsuspecting people step on and die. and those pretty blue ringed octopuses. that are just begging for you to touch them so they can poison you. and then there's the cassowary. shall i go on?

OMG Cate!! You are undoing all my good work!!!

I reckon I almost had her thinking she'd come to visit!!!

How bout we tell her the real dangers??

Like how sorry her head will be if she drinks too much Bundy!

Or how to make sure she doesn't end up with some drunken yobbo on her way home from the pub?

Or the dangers of biting into a hot pie!

Now those are some of the real menaces she'd face!!!

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

To be honest, I've NEVER had to use my training for a bite!
What does that tell ya???

That you're lying?

Lol, don't worry, I can handle the drink stuff . I'm Irish for fuck sake

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

That you're lying?

hehe!! Nope!!! Brownie's honor!!!

Heineken Helen wrote:

Lol, don't worry, I can handle the drink stuff . I'm Irish for fuck sake

Yes I figured you'd handle the drinking!!
I mean it's been genetically bred into us here from our Irish ancestors!!!

bostonlou

Heineken Helen wrote:

Hmm... why did that sound like famous last words?

Emmi??? :eek: GIANT MOTHS???????? :eek: Nobody told me about that :eek: Nope... that's that then!

Lol BL try it sober... below the equator sometime

is jamaica below the equator?

i'm planning on having the spins.... i'll be sure to report back

catefrances

bostonlou wrote:

is jamaica below the equator?

i'm planning on having the spins.... i'll be sure to report back

only if you're standing on your head lou.

thatirwinfella

forget the drop bears, it's the bundy bears you have to look out for. they're ten times the size and lure you with their sweet sugar juice.

The next morning, you wake up next to what looks like roadkill, with a throat that feels like something out of the burke and wills story, and a headache so bad any whisper is like a wail from jimmy barnes.




Any if you can understand that, you must be australian.

Oh yeah, watch out for the bogans, they travel in packs and wear flannel.

i like matt.c

thatirwinfella wrote:

Oh yeah, watch out for the bogans, they travel in packs and wear flannel.

They are definately what you have to look out for. They walk past my house on a regular basis. They also have a unique language..."Howsitgoinmate?"

yellowled24

um....I know we're all trying to convince HH to come over here, and teach her that Aust. is a safe place, but let me add this

almost every day, i find a White Tip spider in my washing basket. And im a clean woman who does atleast one load of washing a day, so its not like its a spider magnet of filth.....it really freaks me out, coz ive heard that if your bitten by one of these mongrels your arm will decay and rot off. :eek:

catefrances

yellowled24 wrote:

um....I know we're all trying to convince HH to come over here, and teach her that Aust. is a safe place, but let me add this

almost every day, i find a White Tip spider in my washing basket. And im a clean woman who does atleast one load of washing a day, so its not like its a spider magnet of filth.....it really freaks me out, coz ive heard that if your bitten by one of these mongrels your arm will decay and rot off. :eek:

ooh yeah those white tipped spiders are nasty.

Heineken Helen

yellowled24 wrote:

um....I know we're all trying to convince HH to come over here, and teach her that Aust. is a safe place, but let me add this

almost every day, i find a White Tip spider in my washing basket. And im a clean woman who does atleast one load of washing a day, so its not like its a spider magnet of filth.....it really freaks me out, coz ive heard that if your bitten by one of these mongrels your arm will decay and rot off. :eek:

:eek: ewwwwwwwww . Trust me, I imagine Australia to be absolutely beautiful and I've met enough Aussies in my lifetime to know they're pretty cool... but I would just be way too paranoid

catefrances

Heineken Helen wrote:

:eek: ewwwwwwwww . Trust me, I imagine Australia to be absolutely beautiful and I've met enough Aussies in my lifetime to know they're pretty cool... but I would just be way too paranoid

you know helen, we actually have cities where you wouldn't see one creature except maybe pigeons and seagulls. and though they may poop on your head, it's highly unlikely.

Heineken Helen

catefrances wrote:

you know helen, we actually have cities where you wouldn't see one creature except maybe pigeons and seagulls. and though they may poop on your head, it's highly unlikely.

yeh but I can see cities here... I wouldn't travel to the other side of the world to visit cities cos a city is a city IMO... there may be different things to see or do in each one but I prefer to find the essence of a country and you can't do that in a city.

catefrances

Heineken Helen wrote:

yeh but I can see cities here... I wouldn't travel to the other side of the world to visit cities cos a city is a city IMO... there may be different things to see or do in each one but I prefer to find the essence of a country and you can't do that in a city.

helen. sydney is not just any city. though i do understand what you're saying. australia is one of the most urbanised societies in the world so you probably would get some essence.
if i told you in all my 42 years in australia ive not been bitten by anything other than my niece when she was 9 months old,(oh and mozzies, but they hardly count) would that ease your concern?

Heineken Helen

catefrances wrote:

helen. sydney is not just any city. though i do understand what you're saying. australia is one of the most urbanised societies in the world so you probably would get some essence.
if i told you in all my 42 years in australia ive not been bitten by anything other than my niece when she was 9 months old,(oh and mozzies, but they hardly count) would that ease your concern?

yes, it would. I'm not a big fan of mozzies either though

catefrances

Heineken Helen wrote:

yes, it would. I'm not a big fan of mozzies either though

well who is?

Collin

How many dangerous spider bites occur in Australia each year? Has anyone died from a bite recently?

There have been no deaths in Australia from a confirmed spider bite since 1979. An effective antivenom for Redback Spiders was introduced in 1956, and one for funnel-web spiders in 1980. These are the only two spiders that have caused deaths in Australia in the past.

A spider bite is not a notifiable medical emergency, so there are no Australia-wide statistics, but the following figures give an idea of the incidence of reported bites in recent years.

Approximately 2000 people are bitten each year by Redback Spiders

Funnel-web spider antivenom has been given to at least 100 patients since 1980. Antivenom is given only when signs of serious envenomation are observed. Many spider bites are 'blank', which means that no venom has been injected.

During 2000 the New South Wales Poisons Information Centre received 4,200 calls about spiders. However not all of these would have involved actual bites. Many reported bites are not able to be identified as definitely being from a spider, and it is nearly impossible to work out what species has caused a bite without seeing a specimen of the spider responsible.

http://www.amonline.net.au/spiders/resources/general.htm#died

Approximately 2000 people, that's like 0.0096% of the people.

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

I like Australians, I love the Ozzies on the board here, I'm sure it's a wonderful beautiful country full of all things... great! But here's the thing, I hate spiders, little ones, big ones, whatever! But here they can't kill ya

I watched a documentary last night called 'backyard killers' about all the stuff in Oz that can kill ya funnel web spiders, snakes, crocodiles, even BEES and I didn't watch the rest. Anyway those spiders fucking freaked me out. It was like watching a horror film as the woman took the clothes off the line, put them in the basket, then it showed the spider crawl down into the clothes, she brought the basket into the house and threw the clothes on the floor as most people don't do. It then showed the spider crawl out of the clothes and into the little girls boot . Then she put her foot in and I'm screaming at the telly 'somebody tell her'. But it's ok, they called someone to sort it out: a spider expert whose job it is to remove the venom... so it zoomed in on the spider as he prodded it with tweezers to get it angry... and it JUMPED up with its fangs in the air FANGS .

Any country where the spiders have fangs, I'm sorry, but it's just not for me

Hels! Not a spider I know, but I did wander out the back last week and discover this green grocer cicada on the side of the house.
Now I snapped away planning to share the pics with you but seems my camera couldn't cope with the dark and just didn't do him justice. Plus I didn't wanna get too close in case he jumped into my face or hair or something equally scream worthy. :eek: Anyhoo, he was this beautiful vibrant sparkling green color and about the length of a standard bic cigarette lighter and probably twice as wide. Anyway, here's the pic I took AND a link to a better pic so you get a better idea. He was pretty and completely non threatening. So we do have lovely bugs here too!

http://s163.photobucket.com/albums/t312/Piesnsauce/?action=view&current=100_1726.jpg

http://s163.photobucket.com/albums/t312/Piesnsauce/?action=view&current=100_1730.jpg

http://www.anhs.com.au/cicada.htm

GreenTeaDisease

hey, when I was in Ireland a SNAIL went in my shoe and then I put my foot in there. that was no picnic either!

vital5

Heineken Helen wrote:

I like Australians, I love the Ozzies on the board here, I'm sure it's a wonderful beautiful country full of all things... great! But here's the thing, I hate spiders, little ones, big ones, whatever! But here they can't kill ya

I watched a documentary last night called 'backyard killers' about all the stuff in Oz that can kill ya funnel web spiders, snakes, crocodiles, even BEES :eek: and I didn't watch the rest. Anyway those spiders fucking freaked me out. It was like watching a horror film as the woman took the clothes off the line, put them in the basket, then it showed the spider crawl down into the clothes, she brought the basket into the house and threw the clothes on the floor as most people don't do. It then showed the spider crawl out of the clothes and into the little girls boot . Then she put her foot in and I'm screaming at the telly 'somebody tell her' . But it's ok, they called someone to sort it out: a spider expert whose job it is to remove the venom... so it zoomed in on the spider as he prodded it with tweezers to get it angry... and it JUMPED up with its fangs in the air FANGS .

Any country where the spiders have fangs, I'm sorry, but it's just not for me

Pussy!... I had been warned by a housemate not to go outside with bare feet recently because they killed a funnel web... fuck that... caution helps... Just don't stick ur hand in a dark dingey place covered in cobwebs and you'll be fine.... come on over.. the waters fine! oh and apparantly some people don't like us Aussies on the boards

vital5

yellowled24 wrote:

um....I know we're all trying to convince HH to come over here, and teach her that Aust. is a safe place, but let me add this

almost every day, i find a White Tip spider in my washing basket. And im a clean woman who does atleast one load of washing a day, so its not like its a spider magnet of filth.....it really freaks me out, coz ive heard that if your bitten by one of these mongrels your arm will decay and rot off. :eek:

only if you are allergic to their venom

vital5

Heineken Helen wrote:

:eek: Shite, I forgot about those



Ooohh yeh, you got great whites too although I like them... but seen enough episodes of home & away to know they kill

Great Whites are rather friendly in fact.. you just gotta rub them in the right spot.... :eek:

I think Steve Irwin said that....

Cree Nations

There are two things....only two things in this world I am scared.
1 zombies
2 spiders