Why I will never go to Australia!

eMMI

Jeanie wrote:

DO NOT PANIC eMMI!!!

We'll protect you!!!

Not that there's anything to protect you from.

I'm not panicking.

aww, thankies lady.

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

the water goes the wrong way... below the equator. I've seen it with my own eyes in South Africa and it's actually pathetically cool

Oh!! I remember now!

You mean the toilet swirls the right way here, and swirls the wrong way there???

I can't believe you went to South Africa, but you're frightened of little old Oz!
Isn't somewhere in South Africa the murder capital of the world???
Seriously Helen, I'd love to know what this bloody tv show is. A few other people have mentioned they watched it the last few weeks and completely freaked out about all the scary shit we supposedly have here.

I don't do creepy crawlies, I don't play with sharks, or stingrays, or dingoes, or any other icky scary thing. I never see them.

The scariest thing we got going on here is the PM's evil head flashing on the tv too often!!

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

Oh!! I remember now!

You mean the toilet swirls the right way here, and swirls the wrong way there???

I can't believe you went to South Africa, but you're frightened of little old Oz!
Isn't somewhere in South Africa the murder capital of the world???
Seriously Helen, I'd love to know what this bloody tv show is. A few other people have mentioned they watched it the last few weeks and completely freaked out about all the scary shit we supposedly have here.

I don't do creepy crawlies, I don't play with sharks, or stingrays, or dingoes, or any other icky scary thing. I never see them.

The scariest thing we got going on here is the PM's evil head flashing on the tv too often!!

Well for some reason I never thought about it at ALL when I went to SA . I dunno, my head just associates deadly crawly stuff with Australia and that's it. I know there's stuff all over the place (apart from Ireland which is why I'm happy here ) that can kill but I dunno, I think of deadly spiders, I think of Oz.

Yep, Johannesburg's the murder capital of the world... or Mexico city or something! But I can handle people they don't scare me

It was called 'backyard killers' but I think it had an Irish voiceover. I've seen a few documentaries of the likes though

markymark550

The only thing I would really worry about in Australia is the Fierce snake, the most poisonous snake on the planet. They are native to Australia, but tend to stay away from cities I believe. So I think you'd be safe from them unless you went to the outback or whatever it's called.

Just step on the spiders if they freak you out....or get some spider spray to take with you.

norm

Heineken Helen wrote:

I like Australians, I love the Ozzies on the board here, I'm sure it's a wonderful beautiful country full of all things... great! But here's the thing, I hate spiders, little ones, big ones, whatever! But here they can't kill ya

I watched a documentary last night called 'backyard killers' about all the stuff in Oz that can kill ya funnel web spiders, snakes, crocodiles, even BEES :eek: and I didn't watch the rest. Anyway those spiders fucking freaked me out. It was like watching a horror film as the woman took the clothes off the line, put them in the basket, then it showed the spider crawl down into the clothes, she brought the basket into the house and threw the clothes on the floor as most people don't do. It then showed the spider crawl out of the clothes and into the little girls boot :eek: . Then she put her foot in and I'm screaming at the telly 'somebody tell her' :eek: . But it's ok, they called someone to sort it out: a spider expert whose job it is to remove the venom... so it zoomed in on the spider as he prodded it with tweezers to get it angry... and it JUMPED up with its fangs in the air :eek: FANGS :eek: .

Any country where the spiders have fangs, I'm sorry, but it's just not for me

stop watching docs about things that kill..............prob solved........:D:D

Heineken Helen

markymark550 wrote:

The only thing I would really worry about in Australia is the Fierce snake, the most poisonous snake on the planet. They are native to Australia, but tend to stay away from cities I believe. So I think you'd be safe from them unless you went to the outback or whatever it's called.

Just step on the spiders if they freak you out....or get some spider spray to take with you.

But that's only if you see them :eek: I heard 8 out of the 10 deadliest spiders live in Oz

markymark550

Heineken Helen wrote:

But that's only if you see them :eek: I heard 8 out of the 10 deadliest spiders live in Oz

Didn't know that it was 8 of the top 10. :eek:

In that case, check your shoes before putting them on and double the amount of spider spray

libragirl

Yeah spiders are scary but I think I'd be willing to brave it out. Austraila looks beautiful I would like to visit someday.

Heineken Helen

cutback wrote:

stop watching docs about things that kill..............prob solved........:D:D

yah, but then I wouldn't know what could kill me

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

Well for some reason I never thought about it at ALL when I went to SA . I dunno, my head just associates deadly crawly stuff with Australia and that's it. I know there's stuff all over the place (apart from Ireland which is why I'm happy here ) that can kill but I dunno, I think of deadly spiders, I think of Oz.

Yep, Johannesburg's the murder capital of the world... or Mexico city or something! But I can handle people they don't scare me

It was called 'backyard killers' but I think it had an Irish voiceover. I've seen a few documentaries of the likes though

Well it's a shame girl. Because we'd love you to come visit, and bring eMMI with you!

I think I know the doco you mean, and I refuse to watch it!
It's hideous!! :eek:

I reckon the insects I see the most here in suburbia are snails and flies.
And in the Summer mozzies.

Otherwise, it's all pretty mundane love. Perfectly safe.

Heineken Helen

markymark550 wrote:

Didn't know that it was 8 of the top 10. :eek:

In that case, check your shoes before putting them on and double the amount of spider spray

SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! :cool:

well Jeanie, we'll just have to get you over here

where it IS actually perfectly safe

I bet you know SOMEONE who was killed by a spider or a snake or a crocodile or something

Jeanie

eMMI wrote:

I'm not panicking.

aww, thankies lady.

Can't wait to see you!

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! :cool:

well Jeanie, we'll just have to get you over here

where it IS actually perfectly safe

I bet you know SOMEONE who was killed by a spider or a snake or a crocodile or something

Oh for goodness sake!!!

The only person I know that was killed by a creature was Steve Irwin!!

Of course, I'd love to come over there for a visit, but I'm a bit worried about the leprechauns!!

Not to mention all that scary shit at the airports about how if I leave my bags unattended they'll take them out and explode them! :eek:

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

Oh for goodness sake!!!

The only person I know that was killed by a creature was Steve Irwin!!

Of course, I'd love to come over there for a visit, but I'm a bit worried about the leprechauns!!

Not to mention all that scary shit at the airports about how if I leave my bags unattended they'll take them out and explode them! :eek:

See... you DO know somebody

Ah don't worry about the leprechauns... if you catch them, they have to give you a pot of gold... hardly similar to a spider that can kill ya in 15 minutes :eek:

And just keep your bag ON you and they'll be fine

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

See... you DO know somebody

Ah don't worry about the leprechauns... if you catch them, they have to give you a pot of gold... hardly similar to a spider that can kill ya in 15 minutes :eek:

And just keep your bag ON you and they'll be fine

Oh yeah, I forgot about how Steve used to drop in for a barbie every other weekend!!! :rolleyes:

Well the little people, they only give you gold if they like you don't they?
I've heard they can be scary if they don't!! :eek:

I live 5 minutes from a major hospital, which would have anti venom, not to mention that I'm a qualified 1st Aider, just supposing by some miniscule chance that there was even a poisonous spider in the backyard and it managed to hunt you down and bite you!!

It's not my bag I worry about Hels!!! :eek:
Mine would have to be pried from my fingers by Arnold Schwarzenegger!
It's those other folks with the dodgy bags.

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

Oh yeah, I forgot about how Steve used to drop in for a barbie every other weekend!!! :rolleyes:

Well the little people, they only give you gold if they like you don't they?
I've heard they can be scary if they don't!! :eek:

I live 5 minutes from a major hospital, which would have anti venom, not to mention that I'm a qualified 1st Aider, just supposing by some miniscule chance that there was even a poisonous spider in the backyard and it managed to hunt you down and bite you!!

It's not my bag I worry about Hels!!! :eek:
Mine would have to be pried from my fingers by Arnold Schwarzenegger!
It's those other folks with the dodgy bags.

well isn't it the same in EVERY airport? There's way less security in Dublin airport than in teh UK airports.

The leprechauns will try to con you but if you're clever, you get the money

Well it DID show on the documentary what to do if you're bitten which was clever, by putting a bandage tight around the area... or was that with a snake

catefrances

Jeanie wrote:

Oh for goodness sake!!!

The only person I know that was killed by a creature was Steve Irwin!!

Of course, I'd love to come over there for a visit, but I'm a bit worried about the leprechauns!!

Not to mention all that scary shit at the airports about how if I leave my bags unattended they'll take them out and explode them! :eek:

don't forget jeanie eevry now and again a tourist gets eaten by a crocodile. sharks will take a nibble out of you and in most cases spit you out cause you taste fuuny. or they think you're a seal cause you're stupid enough to wear a black wetsuit. we have those stone fish as well that unsuspecting people step on and die. and those pretty blue ringed octopuses. that are just begging for you to touch them so they can poison you. and then there's the cassowary. shall i go on?

Jeanie

Heineken Helen wrote:

well isn't it the same in EVERY airport? There's way less security in Dublin airport than in teh UK airports.

The leprechauns will try to con you but if you're clever, you get the money

Well it DID show on the documentary what to do if you're bitten which was clever, by putting a bandage tight around the area... or was that with a snake

Yeah, probably Hels. It's been a really long time since I was at Heathrow.
And I caught the ferry in and out of Ireland, so never saw your airports.

Hmm....tricky little fellas these leprechauns, might need your help!
I'll split it with ya!!

Yeah, depends on the bite, but pressure bandage and immobilize the area, tends to be the best thing, then seek medical attention.
To be honest, I've NEVER had to use my training for a bite!
What does that tell ya???

Jeanie

catefrances wrote:

don't forget jeanie eevry now and again a tourist gets eaten by a crocodile. sharks will take a nibble out of you and in most cases spit you out cause you taste fuuny. or they think you're a seal cause you're stupid enough to wear a black wetsuit. we have those stone fish as well that unsuspecting people step on and die. and those pretty blue ringed octopuses. that are just begging for you to touch them so they can poison you. and then there's the cassowary. shall i go on?

OMG Cate!! You are undoing all my good work!!!

I reckon I almost had her thinking she'd come to visit!!!

How bout we tell her the real dangers??

Like how sorry her head will be if she drinks too much Bundy!

Or how to make sure she doesn't end up with some drunken yobbo on her way home from the pub?

Or the dangers of biting into a hot pie!

Now those are some of the real menaces she'd face!!!

Heineken Helen

Jeanie wrote:

To be honest, I've NEVER had to use my training for a bite!
What does that tell ya???

That you're lying?

Lol, don't worry, I can handle the drink stuff . I'm Irish for fuck sake