Cancer, and me.

F Me In The Brain

You got this!

GlowGirl

You are one strong women!! I know you can do this. Quitting smoking is not easy, but I know you can do it. How are you feeling otherwise?

hedonist

GlowGirl said:

You are one strong women!! I know you can do this. Quitting smoking is not easy, but I know you can do it. How are you feeling otherwise?

Thanks for asking; I’m a bit nervous and my throat hurts more each day. “It’ll get
worse before it gets better.”  I know, I know! This is good practice, in a way. 

SPEEDY MCCREADY

hedonist I sent u a private message. 
At least i think i did. 

hedonist

SPEEDY MCCREADY said:

hedonist I sent u a private message. 
At least i think i did. 

On my wall It is appreciated, Speedy.  

SPEEDY MCCREADY

hedonist said:

SPEEDY MCCREADY said:

hedonist I sent u a private message. 
At least i think i did. 

On my wall It is appreciated, Speedy.  

  

xavier mcdaniel

hedonist said:

I wanted to share this here, as I've come to know and grow fond of some of you over these many years.

So, I recently found out I have it.

It's stage 2 or 3 throat cancer (upcoming PET scan will determine its "class" and whether it's spread beyond the lymph nodes in my throat).  I know this is part of life; I'm not so special to think I would be passed by...if that makes sense.

Because of the cirrhosis, we're hesitant to go the surgery/radiation route (plus I'd much prefer to keep my lymph nodes along with other body parts), which would mean radiation five times a week for eight weeks, along with low-dose chemo.  Should be starting in the next couple of weeks.

It's funny, I'm nervous but not.  I know that after the past almost-five years and how far I've come since, I can handle this next step on my journey to....?  Well, I will handle it.  I'm fortunate to have a rock of a husband and great team of doctors.  I've also had wonderful examples of grace under this kind of pressure from people I know/knew and admire, from my late father and cousin, to another cousin, and our very own Wob.

So, that's it for now

good luck with everything. hope it turns out well for you.

hedonist

Thanks, xavier. Me too!

PureandEasy

hedonist said:

On day 4 of no more smoking. Probably not the best timing stress-wise, but sure is a test of my will. After forty years and the slap of cancer, I’d say it’s time, no?

I’m proud of myself for doing this, no matter how late in the game. It is SO goddamn hard though. I did not expect the extreme mood swings and how difficult it is riding out each urge. But I have to do this, for myself.  

Not giving up cannabis — fuck knows I’m gonna really need it in the next few months — though most likely going with edibles and tinctures. 

I was a 40+ year smoker too and it will be 3 years January 4, 2022 since my last cigarette.  I am using Juul though, it is just the nicotine; no more tar or tobacco.  But with your situation, I don't know if that is an option for you.  But even if you just took a hit once in a while to satisfy the craving . . . I don't know.  All I know, is it has worked for me 100%.  The danger of cigs is the carcinogens not necessarily the nicotine.  I was told by a doctor that nicotine addiction is the same as caffeine addiction and probably 50+% of the world have that addiction.  But with your throat cancer, not sure you should be doing anything like that at all.  Have you tried Nicorette?  All I know is my lungs are much better, I lost my smokers cough w/i a month or two. I'm flabbergasted, never thought I could do it.

GlowGirl

hedonist said:

GlowGirl said:

You are one strong women!! I know you can do this. Quitting smoking is not easy, but I know you can do it. How are you feeling otherwise?

Thanks for asking; I’m a bit nervous and my throat hurts more each day. “It’ll get
worse before it gets better.”  I know, I know! This is good practice, in a way. 

I am sorry your throat is in pain. I am sure that the stress of all this is making it even harder to quit smoking. Are you using the patch or gum to help you out. I will say it again, your attitude is stellar. 

hedonist

GlowGirl said:

hedonist said:

GlowGirl said:

You are one strong women!! I know you can do this. Quitting smoking is not easy, but I know you can do it. How are you feeling otherwise?

Thanks for asking; I’m a bit nervous and my throat hurts more each day. “It’ll get
worse before it gets better.”  I know, I know! This is good practice, in a way. 

I am sorry your throat is in pain. I am sure that the stress of all this is making it even harder to quit smoking. Are you using the patch or gum to help you out. I will say it again, your attitude is stellar. 

GG, no patch or anything — straight quitting, baby! I don’t even drink anything caffeinated so don’t want something putting nicotine in my body. I tell ya though, I haven’t been this tired since I first got sick more than four years ago. 

P&E, good on ya! I’m using a vape for cannabis but will be switching to non-smoking methods. It’s just too hard on my throat…although while I’m able, light vape hits for much better walks/workouts. 

Meltdown99

Cancer sucks.   Best wishes for good treatment and speedy recovery..

hedonist

Meltdown99 said:

Cancer sucks.   Best wishes for good treatment and speedy recovery..

Thanks. I bought a small “fuck cancer” sticker (among others) for my cane. 

cblock4life

Don’t know if it’s an option for you but Wellbutrin worked unbelievably well for me and gave me energy plus took the edge off the mood swings and cravings to the point of almost none.  Been over three years for me and still take it for the energy and mood enhancer due to medical issues.  Thinking bout you…..keep us posted. 

Wobbie

good (((((vibes)))), hedo!

Meltdown99

hedonist said:

Meltdown99 said:

Cancer sucks.   Best wishes for good treatment and speedy recovery..

Thanks. I bought a small “fuck cancer” sticker (among others) for my cane. 

You got a great attitude.  You got this…

hedonist

cblock4life said:

Don’t know if it’s an option for you but Wellbutrin worked unbelievably well for me and gave me energy plus took the edge off the mood swings and cravings to the point of almost none.  Been over three years for me and still take it for the energy and mood enhancer due to medical issues.  Thinking bout you…..keep us posted. 

Thank you! Three years — that’s impressive.  I’m determined to do this without any kind of supplements. Been six days

Wob, you know I’ll take them! Today I find out about this asshole’s stage, the treatment plans, and when I start.

GlowGirl

hedonist said:

cblock4life said:

Don’t know if it’s an option for you but Wellbutrin worked unbelievably well for me and gave me energy plus took the edge off the mood swings and cravings to the point of almost none.  Been over three years for me and still take it for the energy and mood enhancer due to medical issues.  Thinking bout you…..keep us posted. 

Thank you! Three years — that’s impressive.  I’m determined to do this without any kind of supplements. Been six days

Wob, you know I’ll take them! Today I find out about this asshole’s stage, the treatment plans, and when I start.

Good luck with your appointment today, and the treatment plan. I will be thinking of you!

Spunkie

How long will it take for you to kick that c@nt to the curb?

hedonist

You know what the little fucker hasn’t done? Metastasized!

It’ll take five days a week for seven weeks, plus some low-dose chemo, starting the week of new year’s.

I’m warning you all now: I’m gonna be looking real purdy