i had blocked out past memories of a former girlfriend of mine that suffered from manic depression. this has brought it all back. she suffered tremendously every day even while trying to put up a brave front. it reached a point unfortunately where i could not help her even though i tried to get her the best professional help i could. she tried to commit suicide in my home by taking an overdose of pills. luckily she didn't .we split up not long after that and within a couple of years she ended up dying by depriving herself of day to day essentials. this is not about doing something to hurt someone. it is about inner pain and suffering. maybe he just couldn't take it any more . we will never know for sure. i have someone now who works for me that suffers from some form of depression. i always tell her that she is working in a safe place and we have lots of laughs. just try to do what you can for those that need just a hello.
0
KV4053
Mike's side, crushed up against the stage Posts: 1,504
edited May 2017
It was May 2017. Until now, I didn't know how to open up here regarding Chris' passing. I put on Higher Truth today, for perhaps only the second time. I don't even know. Music has a strange place in my life. I can't live without it, but I tend to run through the usual suspects, mostly electric and harder. Unless I'm in a darker place. Then I listen to more acoustic stuff. Mood music. Though, for reasons unknown, Chris' solo albums, have not been in the rotation. Why? I don't know. But today is dark. Very dark. And not just today. But the last few. So I turned to Higher Truth. And I'm in a better place. Less dark. So, like you, I've been overcome by Chris' passing. So I share the story of the first time my best friend, who was taken by cancer a few years ago, and I saw Pearl Jam and Soundgarden.
It was October 1991. Ten was released. Free promo copy from the record store I worked at. Work? That wasn't work. Paid to play. Throw Ten into my CD player on the way home. WTF!! (or whatever the equivalent was in 1991). Return to the store the next day. Find my co-worker. What was his name? He shared with me his wisdom. The history of the Pacific Northwest Music Scene. End the day. Arms full of CDs. Soundgarden dominating the take.
It was April 1992. My friend and I saw Soundgarden at a small place in Houston
called the Unicorn. It was a hollowed out grocery store. Converted into a rock club. Hallowed ground. We were there to see Pearl Jam. But. Unbeknownst to me. At the time. A forever memory. Pearl Jam and Soundgarden.
We were so excited. We arrived real early. Snuck in for
Soundgarden’s soundcheck. Hung around after. See Kim Thayil getting
food from the buffet with the road crew. There’s video somewhere with my friend on MTV with Duff, an MTV VJ. I hid from the MTV cameras,
but he jumped right in. Concert starts. We are first row. Crushed up against the stage. Mike's side. (hence the location in my signature). My friend lasts until half way through PJ's set. Crowd surging forward. Crushing us up against the stage. These were the days when there was no barrier or security between you and the band. Ed dove into the crowd. Crowd shifted. My friend escapes the front of the stage. My hero, even then, sailing above my outstretched arms. An amazing place to be. An amazing time to...be. Then came the headliner. Mesmerized by Chris' vocals. Matt's drums. Kim's guitar. I have no idea what they played that night. But remember it being an amazing set. Wishing they played Big Dumb Sex. My girlfriend at the time loved that song....or loved teasing me with it. Either way. A great song. Soundgarden played like the Rock Gods that they were and are. Until.
It was May 2017. That night in April 1992 is my greatest music memory. I saw Soundgarden several times afterwards including Lolla 92, opening for GnR, etc. But. Nothing will top that night in April 1992. Youth. You will be missed. Chris. You will be missed more.
"On what tomorrow holds for you. I’ll be waiting. At the end of every road you choose."
Post edited by KV4053 on
I know I was born and I know that I'll die. The in between is mine.
I still can't bring myself to listen to any of his music -- that wound is way too fresh. The Singles deluxe edition is sitting shrink-wrapped on my coffee table. The fact that some of my favorite songs -- ones that got me through some very hard times and have continued to be a vital outlet -- will take on irrevocable double-meanings is difficult to swallow.
As it's always been, Pearl Jam's music has been a godsend in these times -- and I can't help but find that some of Eddie's lyrics carry a new weight in the wake of last week's tragedy. The "snowflake falls in May" line in Man of the Hour has come out of my speakers countless times and has never evoked much of a reaction from me previously. When it happened on my commute this morning, it seared.
Absolutely devastated, and I'm beyond heartbroken for his family and friends. My favorite voice is gone and nothing will ever be the same again. The amount of love being shown on these forums is a lone bright spot. We'll all get through this together.
Bristow, VA 5/13/2010
Baltimore, MD 10/27/2013 Fort Lauderdale, FL 4/8/2016 Miami, FL 4/9/2016 Tampa, FL 4/11/2016 Temple of the Dog - Philadelphia, PA 11/4/2016 Seattle, WA 8/8/2018 & 8/10/2018 Boston, MA 9/2/2018 Nashville, TN 9/16/2022
It was May 2017. Until now, I didn't know how to open up here regarding Chris' passing. I put on Higher Truth today, for perhaps only the second time. I don't even know. Music has a strange place in my life. I can't live without it, but I tend to run through the usual suspects, mostly electric and harder. Unless I'm in a darker place. Then I listen to more acoustic stuff. Mood music. Though, for reasons unknown, Chris' solo albums, have not been in the rotation. Why? I don't know. But today is dark. Very dark. And not just today. But the last few. So I turned to Higher Truth. And I'm in a better place. Less dark. So, like you, I've been overcome by Chris' passing. So I share the story of the first time my best friend, who was taken by cancer a few years ago, and I saw Pearl Jam and Soundgarden.
It was October 1991. Ten was released. Free promo copy from the record store I worked at. Work? That wasn't work. Paid to play. Throw Ten into my CD player on the way home. WTF!! (or whatever the equivalent was in 1991). Return to the store the next day. Find my co-worker. What was his name? He shared with me his wisdom. The history of the Pacific Northwest Music Scene. End the day. Arms full of CDs. Soundgarden dominating the take.
It was April 1992. My friend and I saw Soundgarden at a small place in Houston
called the Unicorn. It was a hollowed out grocery store. Converted into a rock club. Hallowed ground. We were there to see Pearl Jam. But. Unbeknownst to me. At the time. A forever memory. Pearl Jam and Soundgarden.
We were so excited. We arrived real early. Snuck in for
Soundgarden’s soundcheck. Hung around after. See Kim Thayil getting
food from the buffet with the road crew. There’s video somewhere with my friend on MTV with Duff, an MTV VJ. I hid from the MTV cameras,
but he jumped right in. Concert starts. We are first row. Crushed up against the stage. Mike's side. (hence the location in my signature). My friend lasts until half way through PJ's set. Crowd surging forward. Crushing us up against the stage. These were the days when there was no barrier or security between you and the band. Ed dove into the crowd. Crowd shifted. My friend escapes the front of the stage. My hero, even then, sailing above my outstretched arms. An amazing place to be. An amazing time to...be. Then came the headliner. Mesmerized by Chris' vocals. Matt's drums. Kim's guitar. I have no idea what they played that night. But remember it being an amazing set. Wishing they played Big Dumb Sex. My girlfriend at the time loved that song....or loved teasing me with it. Either way. A great song. Soundgarden played like the Rock Gods that they were and are. Until.
It was May 2017. That night in April 1992 is my greatest music memory. I saw Soundgarden several times afterwards including Lolla 92, opening for GnR, etc. But. Nothing will top that night in April 1992. Youth. You will be missed. Chris. You will be missed more.
"On what tomorrow holds for you. I’ll be waiting. At the end of every road you choose."
You know, I am 27. I am the kind of guy who usually thinks "fuck, I should have been born 10 years before in another country" (a little bit stupid actually, anyway...) and each time I watch and "old" (for me) movie, or gig on youtube, I do envy those guys who were part of it.
I really envy your memory, it's beautiful. At least, I like how i felt as I read it. I could almost roll the movie in my head. It's a nice pride you have and thank you for sharing it here.
I don't wanna sound too much pop but this people are never going to die. They are gonna live for ever. I mean, I put some Cornell stuff today and it just fills the room. And that will never stop.
It feels so surreal that I shouldn’t be typing this. I
shouldn’t be home. At this very moment I
should be downtown at the Fillmore listening to Chris’s voice belting out an encore
of Rusty Cage or maybe Jesus Christ Pose. I wear scrubs to work but took my “going
to a concert after work clothes” with me today. Kind of stupid but I guess that’s
a part of the denial stage. Also in a little denial I drove by the Fillmore tonight after work. It was, very appropriately,
raining like crazy but there were a few brave gentle souls camped out holding a
vigil in front a of the venue with several bouquets of flowers tied to the
fence. That’s when I really lost it. Gutted…
This bullshit in Manchester tonight made me think about a lot of things, but it also gave me another reason to miss Chris. Chris was a voice of reason and sense. He struck me as being altruistic in word and deed. He had good observations. He also had a platform, where good observations could be shared and spread. We live in a world where a suicide bomber targets adolescent girls. We live in a world where the immediate response of some is to condemn an entire religion, or an entire geographic region. I can't help but think that we could use more voices of reason and sense.
I posted this yesterday, but in the wrong thread. Sorry for reposting, but I thought I'd put it here and leave it alone. I'm an old guy, was in college in 1991 when Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and Soundgarden all happened at once. Lots has happened to me since then, and I wrote about it. I'm really grateful for the example of Eddie Vedder and Chris Cornell. Unless something changes, the last real rock stars.
By the way, I have more than passing experience with ativan addiction. It's horrible, scary, deadly stuff. I write under my real name, lots of what I know is protected by anonymity, and I'd rather not share more than I did. But all I can say is that I have huge compassion for Chris. Thanks folks, peace. Here is the link: http://bit.ly/2rOX6jN
Doing mindless busy work today I found myself wondering what it must have been like for him trapped in that room and walking around looking for something to kill himself with. Did he plan it? Did he just hang up the phone and say thats it, now how am I going to do this? Or did he pack the exercise band knowing what he was going to do, but not sure when? My head is so fucked up with trying to wrap my head around what the fuck happened. His personality gave us these all these amazing songs and all of these beautiful feelings. And now its gone.
One thing about life, it never stays the same. The "galaxy of impermanence" which I just read about tells me to let the things that should come to me come and the things i don't need go. The problem with this situation is I was not ready for that bright light to go, hence the dark thoughts and feeling of sadness and even anger that this has happened "to me". As we know nothing has happened to me that hasn't just happened to all of us. But it's personal.
People mentioned Kurt. Sad yes. Was I surprised? No. This took me by total surprise. Shit, I'm crying again....
(((())))
5/3/92 Omaha, NE
6/19/95 Red Rocks
9/11/98 MSG
11/19/12 EV solo Tulsa
7/19/13 Wrigley 10/19/13 Brooklyn 2 10/21/13 Philly 1 10/22/13 Philly 2 10/25/13 Hartford
10/08/14 Tulsa 10/09/14 Lincoln
9/26/15 NYC Global Citizen
4/16/16 Greenville 4/28/16 Philly 1 4/29/16 Philly 2 5/1/16 MSG 1 5/2/16 MSG 2 8/7/16 Fenway 2 8/20/16 Wrigley 1 4/7/17 RRHOF New York City 9/2/18 Fenway 1 9/4/2018 Fenway 2 9/18/21 Asbury Park 2/4/22 EV Earthlings NYC 2/6/22 EV Earthlings Newark 9/11/22 MSG 9/14/22 Camden 9/3/24 MSG 1 9/4/24 MSG 2 9/7/24 Philly 1 9/9/24 Philly 2
Took this tragedy to finally get a few more solo albums I've been meaning to get.. one being Songbook. Looked for it on vinyl, was selling 5 days ago for $35, now its $135. I saw a rumor they are being repressed, anyone know if that is true? Got a digital version, and am kicking myself not not listening to it for the last 5 years.
You should track down the live in sweden bootleg. It was an acoustic radio station set that cornell did, that was broadcast on FM radio in Sweden. It basically jumpstarted that solo acoustic touring career that soundbook came from. It's an amazing recording and is widely circulated.
Thanks, will look for it. Was never a big fan of AS, loved his voice on the songs, but I just didn't like a lot of the music behind it. I found the AS covers on Songbook were so much better than the studio AS versions. Even the SG covers were amazing, and I love SG, but the covers on SG sounded so different and simplified you could enjoy it at a while different level.
I hope the police check his computer for a suicide note/letter, since this still makes no sense. I'm forced to look for clues in his song lyrics. Is it ironic or foreshadowing that he had a song titled Pretty Noose and has a noose around his neck in his last video?
"When you find your way then you see it disappear, it's alright....."
Bridge Benefit 1994, San Francisco 1995, San Diego 1995 1 & 2, Missoula 1998, Los Angeles 2000, San Diego 2000, Eddie Vedder/Beck 2/26/2002, Santa Barbara 2003, Irvine 2003, San Diego 2003, Vancouver 2005, Gorge 2005, San Diego 2006, Los Angeles 2006 1 & 2, Santa Barbara 2006, Eddie Vedder 4/10/08, Eddie Vedder 4/12/08, Eddie Vedder 4/15/08, 7/12/2008, SF 8/28/09, LA 9/30/09, LA 10/1/09, LA 10/06/09, LA 10/07/09, San Diego 10/09/09, Eddie Vedder 7/6/2011, Eddie Vedder 7/8/2011, PJ20 9/3/2011, PJ20 9/4/2011, Vancouver 9/25/2011, San Diego 11/21/13, LA 11/24/13, Ohana 9/25/21, Ohana 9/26/21, Ohana 10/1/21, EV 2/17/22, LA Forum 5/6/22, LA Forum 5/7/22, EV 10/1/22, EV 9/30/23
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
Beavis: All my friends are brown and red? What does that mean?
Butthead: It means that his friends are like turds and that they like suck.
Beavis: Heh heh. Oh yeah. Yeah! Get those spoons out of my face before I shove them up your butt!
Butthead: Huh huh.
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
Chris's death was WAY more shocking than any of the other lead singers (Kurt, Layne, Shannon, Scott, Andy, et al), because Chris seemed to be healthy and stable compared to the rest of them. All the others were totally messed up on drugs and were generally in a pretty public downward spiral, so I didn't feel any surprise at all with those guys (and I wasn't that huge a Nirvana fan at the time anyway. Shannon Hoon's death was the one that upset me the most, even though it still didn't really shock me - he was totally messed up by then). Not so with Chris. It felt completely out of the blue. Total shock to me. But I'm moving on here. I am very sad about the whole thing and will always feel like it was a shock.... Having not known Chris, though, I am not going to pretend that I'm feeling devastated. I feel like it is a great loss for those who did know him, and I feel awful for all of those people, more than anything. I will mourn and remember and appreciate him by enjoying his music for the rest of my life, just like I have been doing since I was about 13 years old.
Post edited by PJ_Soul on
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
well they are really different feelings. Yes Chris' is more shocking because of the circumstances and the fact that he had literally just played a show and seemed to be in a good place. Kurt's death wasn't shocking as their had been close calls before but you have to remember Kurt was the biggest rock star on the planet at the time. It was a blow because the world lost someone in the midst of their fame and was a much bigger news story. It was literally everywhere and at every news source.
I also think as we age death hits us in a different way. As we start to realize our own mortality more a life ended like Chris' and at his age and what he seemingly had to live for hits us closer to home. when people around your age start to die it gives you more pause as you get older. at least for me it gives me more perspective to enjoy what i have in the now. Not saying death doesn't hit younger ones hard it's just...different.
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
I used to listen SG, Chris Cornell and Audioslave for 25 years now and it came out of nowhere. When Kurt died they were known for 3 years and there had been some serious alerts regarding Kurt. It feels different in many ways. I still avoid some footage about Kurt though. (Such as montage of heck and the conspiracy trash with Courtney Love by the way)
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
I used to listen SG, Chris Cornell and Audioslave for 25 years now and it came out of nowhere. When Kurt died they were known for 3 years and there had been some serious alerts regarding Kurt. It feels different in many ways. I still avoid some footage about Kurt though. (Such as montage of heck and the conspiracy trash with Courtney Love by the way)
Why Montage of Heck?
"Mostly I think that people react sensitively because they know you’ve got a point"
Kurt died 2 days before my first PJ show on 4/10/94. We were literally loading up the car for a road trip when we heard the news. Being a teenager, it was sad, but not unexpected as he was fairly deep into the H at this point. We just hoped our show would go on...it of course was epic.
Chris being the rock star I grew up with, now older and feeling closer to his age....its just much more upsetting.
I feel like the past 25 years I've grown to know these guys...for me it feels like the end of an era, and that's really sad.
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
I used to listen SG, Chris Cornell and Audioslave for 25 years now and it came out of nowhere. When Kurt died they were known for 3 years and there had been some serious alerts regarding Kurt. It feels different in many ways. I still avoid some footage about Kurt though. (Such as montage of heck and the conspiracy trash with Courtney Love by the way)
Why Montage of Heck?
Painful I guess. Bought it when it went out but didn't find the courage to watch it yet.
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
Cobain wasn't a surprise. There were rumors from a month before that he had died, and most if not everyone knew how unstable he was.
I was only 17, and as much as it sucked, it wasn't a surprise.
The news about Cornell was out of nowhere & hit me like a Mack Truck.
The only celebrity death I can compare Cornell to was Mark Sandman of Morphine, whom I had just seen 1 month prior.
Edit: on second though, there is one creepy similarity for me personally. I saw both Cobain & Cornell in concert the November before each died (Nirvana, Springfield, MA 1993, TOTD, Philly I, 2016)
I'm glad I got to see each of those bands live, but I would trade either / both show(s) to have them still with us.
I am really saddened by the loss of Chris! My thoughts and prayers go out to his family and friends! I am 45 years old, so Chris's voice has been a huge part of the soundtrack to my life! Rest easy Chris Cornell....you will forever be missed and your music will live forever!
Agree with what everyone has said, this just came out of nowhere. Kurt had been travelling a downward spiral, and had always been very uncomfortable with his celebrity status. I remember receiving news of Kurt's death vividly. I had just seen Nirvana for the first time a few months earlier at their last Canadian show, January 4 1994. Despite all the rumours and drug addiction surrounding Kurt, they put on a phenomenal show. They had been rumoured to be playing Lollapalooza that coming summer, so I was optimistic that he had taken a turn for the better, so in that sense there was some surprise. I was told by a friend during our Grade 8 science fair, and was so upset that I just left and went home crying my eyes out. I isolated myself for weeks. Like Tristelune, I still find it very difficult to listen to the music or watch anything about Nirvana.
Having said that, this is still way more of a shock. While I had been a fan of Nirvana for maybe 3 years, Chris's music has been a big part of my life for over 25 years. I first saw SG in 1992, and though I only saw maybe 4 shows in the 90's, I think I've seen Chris at least 10 times since 2010 in SG, solo, ToTD, and Mad Season. In every instance he seemed so positive, so full of life. He exuded such an appreciation for all the things he had in his life, especially his family. I felt like he had grown healthier and wiser with time. He was such a great story teller, and a hilarious showman, much in the same vein of EV and Bruce...like an elder statesmen who had fought through past issues and had come out stronger because of it. His presence and ability to engage the crowd was amazing. By all outward actions, he seemed to be working hard, enjoying life, and at peace with himself. For that reason, I'm still at such a loss. I don't think this will heal with time, it just makes no sense at all. My thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends.
1992-07-21 Vancouver
1993-9-4 Vancouver
1996-9-16 Seattle
1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
2000-11-6 Seattle
2001-10-22 Seattle
2002 -12-09 Seattle
2009-8-17 Manchester, 9-25 Vancouver
2011-6-16 Seattle (EV), 9-3/4 PJ20, 9-25 Vancouver
2012-6-27 Amsterdam (#2!)
2013-11-29 Portland, 12-4 Vancouver, 12-6 Seattle
2014-AUS - 1-26 Sydney, 1-31 Adelaide, 2-11/12 EV Sydney State Theatre, 2-13 EV Opera House
2014 - USA - Memphis, Detroit, MOLINE, St. Paul, MILWAUKEE, Denver, 25/26 Bridge School
2016 - Lexington, Philly x 2, MSG x 2, Quebec City, Ottawa, Toronto x 2, Pemberton, Fenway x 2, Wrigley x 2 2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
For Kurt and Chris, the level of shock is not that different for me, but how I've been processing their losses is completely different. With Kurt, I was 19 and I was angry at him for a long time. With Chris the primary emotions are sadness and confusion.
"Goddamn Romans. Sure know how to make a ... drum room." --Matt Cameron
The band pretty reckless nailed like a stone .at Rock on The range and she the lead singer has a bueatiful voice
Post edited by trees on
PJ Cuyahoga Flalls OH 8/26/1998 PJ Noblesviile IN 8/18/2000 PJ Cincinnatti OH 8/20/2000 PJ Columbus OH 8/21/2000 PJ Columbus OH 6/24/2003 PJ Hamilton Ontario 9/13/2005 PJ Phiadelphia PA 10/3/2005 PJ Cleveland OH 5/20/2006 PJ Columbia SC 6/16/2008..... e.V Chicago IL 8/21/2008 e.V Philly PA 6/11/2009 e.V Bailtimore MD 6/14/2009... PJ Chicago IL 8/23/2009 .PJ...Philly PA 10/27/2009 PJ.Philadephia PA 10/28/2009. PJ Columbus OH 5/6/2010 PJ Cleveland OH 5/9/2010. BRAD Columbus OH 10/5/2010 e.V St.Louis MO 7/1/2011 .PJ.. East Troy WI 9/3/2011..PJ..East Troy WI 9/4/2011 Neil Young & Crazy Horse Cleveland OH 10/8/2012 RNDM Chicago IL11/13/2012 Alice In Chains/SoundGarden Columbus OH 5/19/2013 AIC Fort Wayne IN 5/21/2013 PJ Pittsburgh PA 10/11/2013 AIC Cincinnati OH 5/17/2014 AIC Cleveland OH 5/19/2014 AIC Indianapolis IN 8/19/2014 PJ Cincinnati OH 10/1/2014 AIC Cincinnati OH 8/06/2015 RNDM Chicago IL 3/15/2016 PJ Columbia SC 4\21\2016 PJ Lexington KY 4/26/2016 PJ Chicago IL 8/20/2016 Soundgarden Columbus OH 5/20/2017 Canceled RIP Chris AIC Columbus OH 5/18/2018 PJ Chicago IL 8/18/2018 PJ Chicago IL 8/20/2018 PJ St Louis Missouri 9/18/2022 AIC Cuyohoga falls Oh. 8/16/2019 SHAWNSMITH Rip 2019Mark Lanegan Band 5/18/19
I just read this article regarding Chris' apparent state of mind during Soundgarden's last show. Sure doesn't sound suicidal to me.
"Chris Cornell was fully anticipating Soundgarden's next concert stop after Detroit ... and shared his feelings with the crowd Wednesday night.
In the footage ... Chris and the band were about to start an encore, and he gushed about how awesome Detroit fans had been, saying, "I feel a little bit sorry for the next f***ing place we play."
They were set to play Friday in Columbus, Ohio and Chris joked he'll have to tell fans there, "You should have been at that Detroit show. That crowd was something."
The Fox Theatre crowd ate it up, but this clearly shows Chris was in great spirits, and already thinking beyond Wednesday night. TMZ broke the story ... Chris' wife, Vicky, said he showed no signs of depression or being suicidal in the hours before he was found dead."
for anyone who can remember what it was like when Cobain passed, how does Cornell's passing compare? were you more shocked at Cornell? not to undermine either, but I just feel like Cornell's was completely more shocking. given i was too young to remember Cobain's so i was wondering how everyone else felt.
Both were great musicians who brought so much life back into rock but Chris seemed like a much more together person to me. Losing Kurt was terribly sad but not a total shock. Losing Chris was like having the ground pulled out from under you and left you falling for... well, still, really.
"Don't give in to the lies. Don't give in to the fear. Hold on to the truth. And to hope."
Comments
It was May 2017. Until now, I didn't know how to open up here regarding Chris' passing. I put on Higher Truth today, for perhaps only the second time. I don't even know. Music has a strange place in my life. I can't live without it, but I tend to run through the usual suspects, mostly electric and harder. Unless I'm in a darker place. Then I listen to more acoustic stuff. Mood music. Though, for reasons unknown, Chris' solo albums, have not been in the rotation. Why? I don't know. But today is dark. Very dark. And not just today. But the last few. So I turned to Higher Truth. And I'm in a better place. Less dark. So, like you, I've been overcome by Chris' passing. So I share the story of the first time my best friend, who was taken by cancer a few years ago, and I saw Pearl Jam and Soundgarden.
It was October 1991. Ten was released. Free promo copy from the record store I worked at. Work? That wasn't work. Paid to play. Throw Ten into my CD player on the way home. WTF!! (or whatever the equivalent was in 1991). Return to the store the next day. Find my co-worker. What was his name? He shared with me his wisdom. The history of the Pacific Northwest Music Scene. End the day. Arms full of CDs. Soundgarden dominating the take.
It was April 1992. My friend and I saw Soundgarden at a small place in Houston called the Unicorn. It was a hollowed out grocery store. Converted into a rock club. Hallowed ground. We were there to see Pearl Jam. But. Unbeknownst to me. At the time. A forever memory. Pearl Jam and Soundgarden. We were so excited. We arrived real early. Snuck in for Soundgarden’s soundcheck. Hung around after. See Kim Thayil getting food from the buffet with the road crew. There’s video somewhere with my friend on MTV with Duff, an MTV VJ. I hid from the MTV cameras, but he jumped right in. Concert starts. We are first row. Crushed up against the stage. Mike's side. (hence the location in my signature). My friend lasts until half way through PJ's set. Crowd surging forward. Crushing us up against the stage. These were the days when there was no barrier or security between you and the band. Ed dove into the crowd. Crowd shifted. My friend escapes the front of the stage. My hero, even then, sailing above my outstretched arms. An amazing place to be. An amazing time to...be. Then came the headliner. Mesmerized by Chris' vocals. Matt's drums. Kim's guitar. I have no idea what they played that night. But remember it being an amazing set. Wishing they played Big Dumb Sex. My girlfriend at the time loved that song....or loved teasing me with it. Either way. A great song. Soundgarden played like the Rock Gods that they were and are. Until.
It was May 2017. That night in April 1992 is my greatest music memory. I saw Soundgarden several times afterwards including Lolla 92, opening for GnR, etc. But. Nothing will top that night in April 1992. Youth. You will be missed. Chris. You will be missed more.
"On what tomorrow holds for you. I’ll be waiting. At the end of every road you choose."
As it's always been, Pearl Jam's music has been a godsend in these times -- and I can't help but find that some of Eddie's lyrics carry a new weight in the wake of last week's tragedy. The "snowflake falls in May" line in Man of the Hour has come out of my speakers countless times and has never evoked much of a reaction from me previously. When it happened on my commute this morning, it seared.
Absolutely devastated, and I'm beyond heartbroken for his family and friends. My favorite voice is gone and nothing will ever be the same again. The amount of love being shown on these forums is a lone bright spot. We'll all get through this together.
Baltimore, MD 10/27/2013
Fort Lauderdale, FL 4/8/2016
Miami, FL 4/9/2016
Tampa, FL 4/11/2016
Temple of the Dog - Philadelphia, PA 11/4/2016
Seattle, WA 8/8/2018 & 8/10/2018
Boston, MA 9/2/2018
Nashville, TN 9/16/2022
I really envy your memory, it's beautiful. At least, I like how i felt as I read it. I could almost roll the movie in my head. It's a nice pride you have and thank you for sharing it here.
I don't wanna sound too much pop but this people are never going to die. They are gonna live for ever. I mean, I put some Cornell stuff today and it just fills the room. And that will never stop.
It feels so surreal that I shouldn’t be typing this. I shouldn’t be home. At this very moment I should be downtown at the Fillmore listening to Chris’s voice belting out an encore of Rusty Cage or maybe Jesus Christ Pose. I wear scrubs to work but took my “going to a concert after work clothes” with me today. Kind of stupid but I guess that’s a part of the denial stage. Also in a little denial I drove by the Fillmore tonight after work. It was, very appropriately, raining like crazy but there were a few brave gentle souls camped out holding a vigil in front a of the venue with several bouquets of flowers tied to the fence. That’s when I really lost it. Gutted…
Chris was a voice of reason and sense. He struck me as being altruistic in word and deed. He had good observations. He also had a platform, where good observations could be shared and spread.
We live in a world where a suicide bomber targets adolescent girls. We live in a world where the immediate response of some is to condemn an entire religion, or an entire geographic region. I can't help but think that we could use more voices of reason and sense.
http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/news/ativan-what-you-need-to-know-about-anxiety-pills-w483638
This has information I wasn't aware of...scary shit...
By the way, I have more than passing experience with ativan addiction. It's horrible, scary, deadly stuff. I write under my real name, lots of what I know is protected by anonymity, and I'd rather not share more than I did. But all I can say is that I have huge compassion for Chris. Thanks folks, peace. Here is the link: http://bit.ly/2rOX6jN
Columbia, SC
6/19/95 Red Rocks
9/11/98 MSG
11/19/12 EV solo Tulsa
7/19/13 Wrigley 10/19/13 Brooklyn 2 10/21/13 Philly 1 10/22/13 Philly 2 10/25/13 Hartford
10/08/14 Tulsa 10/09/14 Lincoln
9/26/15 NYC Global Citizen
4/16/16 Greenville 4/28/16 Philly 1 4/29/16 Philly 2 5/1/16 MSG 1 5/2/16 MSG 2 8/7/16 Fenway 2 8/20/16 Wrigley 1
4/7/17 RRHOF New York City
9/2/18 Fenway 1 9/4/2018 Fenway 2
9/18/21 Asbury Park
2/4/22 EV Earthlings NYC 2/6/22 EV Earthlings Newark 9/11/22 MSG 9/14/22 Camden
9/3/24 MSG 1 9/4/24 MSG 2 9/7/24 Philly 1 9/9/24 Philly 2
Even the SG covers were amazing, and I love SG, but the covers on SG sounded so different and simplified you could enjoy it at a while different level.
"When you find your way then you see it disappear, it's alright....."
Butthead: It means that his friends are like turds and that they like suck.
Beavis: Heh heh. Oh yeah. Yeah! Get those spoons out of my face before I shove them up your butt!
Butthead: Huh huh.
But I'm moving on here. I am very sad about the whole thing and will always feel like it was a shock.... Having not known Chris, though, I am not going to pretend that I'm feeling devastated. I feel like it is a great loss for those who did know him, and I feel awful for all of those people, more than anything. I will mourn and remember and appreciate him by enjoying his music for the rest of my life, just like I have been doing since I was about 13 years old.
I also think as we age death hits us in a different way. As we start to realize our own mortality more a life ended like Chris' and at his age and what he seemingly had to live for hits us closer to home. when people around your age start to die it gives you more pause as you get older. at least for me it gives me more perspective to enjoy what i have in the now. Not saying death doesn't hit younger ones hard it's just...different.
I used to listen SG, Chris Cornell and Audioslave for 25 years now and it came out of nowhere. When Kurt died they were known for 3 years and there had been some serious alerts regarding Kurt. It feels different in many ways. I still avoid some footage about Kurt though. (Such as montage of heck and the conspiracy trash with Courtney Love by the way)
Chris being the rock star I grew up with, now older and feeling closer to his age....its just much more upsetting.
I feel like the past 25 years I've grown to know these guys...for me it feels like the end of an era, and that's really sad.
Cobain wasn't a surprise. There were rumors from a month before that he had died, and most if not everyone knew how unstable he was.
I was only 17, and as much as it sucked, it wasn't a surprise.
The news about Cornell was out of nowhere & hit me like a Mack Truck.
The only celebrity death I can compare Cornell to was Mark Sandman of Morphine, whom I had just seen 1 month prior.
Edit: on second though, there is one creepy similarity for me personally. I saw both Cobain & Cornell in concert the November before each died (Nirvana, Springfield, MA 1993, TOTD, Philly I, 2016)
I'm glad I got to see each of those bands live, but I would trade either / both show(s) to have them still with us.
- Mitch Hedberg
Having said that, this is still way more of a shock. While I had been a fan of Nirvana for maybe 3 years, Chris's music has been a big part of my life for over 25 years. I first saw SG in 1992, and though I only saw maybe 4 shows in the 90's, I think I've seen Chris at least 10 times since 2010 in SG, solo, ToTD, and Mad Season. In every instance he seemed so positive, so full of life. He exuded such an appreciation for all the things he had in his life, especially his family. I felt like he had grown healthier and wiser with time. He was such a great story teller, and a hilarious showman, much in the same vein of EV and Bruce...like an elder statesmen who had fought through past issues and had come out stronger because of it. His presence and ability to engage the crowd was amazing. By all outward actions, he seemed to be working hard, enjoying life, and at peace with himself. For that reason, I'm still at such a loss. I don't think this will heal with time, it just makes no sense at all. My thoughts and prayers are with his family and friends.
1993-9-4 Vancouver
1996-9-16 Seattle
1998-7-19 Vancouver, 7-21 Seattle, Memorial Stadium
2000-11-6 Seattle
2001-10-22 Seattle
2002 -12-09 Seattle
2009-8-17 Manchester, 9-25 Vancouver
2011-6-16 Seattle (EV), 9-3/4 PJ20, 9-25 Vancouver
2012-6-27 Amsterdam (#2!)
2013-11-29 Portland, 12-4 Vancouver, 12-6 Seattle
2014-AUS - 1-26 Sydney, 1-31 Adelaide, 2-11/12 EV Sydney State Theatre, 2-13 EV Opera House
2014 - USA - Memphis, Detroit, MOLINE, St. Paul, MILWAUKEE, Denver, 25/26 Bridge School
2016 - Lexington, Philly x 2, MSG x 2, Quebec City, Ottawa, Toronto x 2, Pemberton, Fenway x 2, Wrigley x 2
2018 - Seattle x 2, Missoula, Fenway x 2
For Kurt and Chris, the level of shock is not that different for me, but how I've been processing their losses is completely different. With Kurt, I was 19 and I was angry at him for a long time. With Chris the primary emotions are sadness and confusion.
PJ Cuyahoga Flalls OH 8/26/1998
PJ Noblesviile IN 8/18/2000
PJ Cincinnatti OH 8/20/2000
PJ Columbus OH 8/21/2000
PJ Columbus OH 6/24/2003
PJ Hamilton Ontario 9/13/2005
PJ Phiadelphia PA 10/3/2005
PJ Cleveland OH 5/20/2006
PJ Columbia SC 6/16/2008.....
e.V Chicago IL 8/21/2008
e.V Philly PA 6/11/2009
e.V Bailtimore MD 6/14/2009...
PJ Chicago IL 8/23/2009
.PJ...Philly PA 10/27/2009 PJ.Philadephia PA 10/28/2009.
PJ Columbus OH 5/6/2010
PJ Cleveland OH 5/9/2010.
BRAD Columbus OH 10/5/2010
e.V St.Louis MO 7/1/2011
.PJ.. East Troy WI 9/3/2011..PJ..East Troy WI 9/4/2011
Neil Young & Crazy Horse Cleveland OH 10/8/2012
RNDM Chicago IL11/13/2012
Alice In Chains/SoundGarden Columbus OH 5/19/2013
AIC Fort Wayne IN 5/21/2013
PJ Pittsburgh PA 10/11/2013
AIC Cincinnati OH 5/17/2014
AIC Cleveland OH 5/19/2014
AIC Indianapolis IN 8/19/2014
PJ Cincinnati OH 10/1/2014
AIC Cincinnati OH 8/06/2015
RNDM Chicago IL 3/15/2016
PJ Columbia SC 4\21\2016
PJ Lexington KY 4/26/2016
PJ Chicago IL 8/20/2016
Soundgarden Columbus OH 5/20/2017 Canceled RIP Chris
AIC Columbus OH 5/18/2018
PJ Chicago IL 8/18/2018 PJ Chicago IL 8/20/2018
PJ St Louis Missouri 9/18/2022
AIC Cuyohoga falls Oh. 8/16/2019
SHAWNSMITH Rip 2019Mark Lanegan Band 5/18/19
Sure doesn't sound suicidal to me.