"...Dimitri...He talks to me...'.."The Ghost of Greece..".
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
I don't post here often anymore, but seeing this post made me want to share this cover I recorded last year and my message with everyone here. https://soundcloud.com/ryanlandron/mind-riot
I enjoyed your cover, I liked the pace and the mood. Your voice reminds me Brandon Boyd from Incubus.
I wrote the following piece for Red Mosquito and wanted to share it here as well.
Like most (white) American men of a certain age, grunge was my formative musical experience, and the music resonated with incredible power. Even my lesser lights in the big 6 grunge bands (I always included STP and the Pumpkins alongside the Seattle groups-it feels right spiritually, if not geographically) were still tremendous talents, and it seemed impossible that this much amazing music could come out of one brief moment in time (one I assumed would extend on into forever). 1991-1996 saw Ten, Nevermind, Gish, Badmotorfinger, Core, Dirt, Vs, Siamese Dream, In Utero, Jar of Flies, Vitalogy, Purple, Mellon Collie…, No Code, Tiny Music…, Alice in Chains, Down on the Upside. 6 bands. 5 years. 17 classic albums. Four genre-defining singers coming out of the same god damned town. What a time to find yourself first opening up to music. This became the benchmark against which we all came to measure what music could do. Even as we left these songs behind we expected new music to make us feel the same way.
During those formative years, struggling with the transition into adulthood, I found the darkness and the bleakness in grunge utterly compelling. It felt true, in a way that joy and light and peace and acceptance never did – at least not without being earned, purified through suffering. But one of the things that spoke to me the most about Pearl Jam, which I wasn't able to articulate until I was a bit older and started writing and talking about them in a systemic way, was the optimism that lay beneath the music, though you’d miss it on a superficial listen. Grunge reflected a lost soul searching for a companion to walk with them down a long, dark, lonely, road. In Pearl Jam's music, that ultimately lead someplace better, even if it lay someplace beyond the limits of your current vision. But for Kurt Cobain, Layne Staley, Scott Weiland, and now Chris Cornell, there was no way out. The road itself was the final destination.
Cornell's story is really striking in this regard. He's someone who seemed to make it out, and maybe he did, but the darkness and the demons stayed with him. Even if they were under control, all it takes is that one slip, that one bad night, that one mistake. And his death, or really what his death demonstrated, has made the music more vital. As I've grown up, started a family, a career, and have generally lived a very happy life there's a way in which the grunge themes that seemed so powerful became, if not nostalgic, at least historical. Something you interacted with from a distance and as memory. These songs were still great, but I had to remind myself that they were great. They were no longer living truths. As a result, I had a tendency to become ever so slightly dismissive of them. A little overwrought and over the top. Music for white suburban kids struggling with first world problems. Music for teenagers that play an important part in your transition to adulthood, but that are best left behind afterwards. Fondly recalled, but lacking the same fierce commitment and deadly seriousness.
I love Pearl Jam in part because their music grew past those themes. Themes of alienation became social and political, or personal in a way that reflects a life being lived. When there was a grievance it was a legit grievance with a world that failed to live up to its promise, rather than sullen personal, static, experience. And the best songs were inspirational - reflecting a desire to be a better person, to live a better life. They were written from a place of wisdom and experience - from someone who completed their journey and made it out alive, rather than from someone still stuck on the long, lonely road. And even if I preferred the songs written on the road, I was glad that they moved past it. The fact that they grew, that they weren't stuck in that moment, made those earlier moments feel more authentic - an important part of a larger, more vivid picture. A central chapter in a complex and moving arc, rather than the story in its entirety. It's why a middle aged album like Lightning Bolt, filled with middle aged themes like love, fear of loss, the inadequacy of what we leave behind, both resonant with me and make the earlier work simultaneously more vital.
It’s my experience, but it comes from a place of satisfaction, of having lived, thus far anyway, a good life. Pearl Jam speaks to my experiences. Chris Cornell's tragic death has been a stark and powerful reminder that not everyone escapes, or that you can escape and find yourself wandering back in a loop that feels closed, even if it isn't. That these songs no longer speak to my direct experience doesn't mean they have nothing to say. And in the last few days I find these lonelier, angrier, more hopeless and nihilistic songs have recaptured much of the dark power and terrible beauty lost with age and experience.
Chris Cornell was not one of my favorites in the grunge pantheon, but he was still in the pantheon. I was drawn more to Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and Alice in Chains. But there were no shortage of his songs that I adored, and Soundgarden was my younger brother’s first favorite band. I have vivid memories of him listening to my copy of Superunknown on my Sony discman on long driving vacations with my parents, and feeling proud of my work as a big brother. And given the place that grunge holds in the formation of my identity during those critical years, and Chris’s place within that story, his death hurts, and hurts more for seeing how raw that wound is for so many other people.
I have also received enough 'Eddie is the last man standing' texts from my friends that I find myself incredibly grateful for the fact that he is, especially since, 20+ years ago, he seemed the person the most likely to go first. Some fans have bemoaned the celebratory atmosphere that defines the modern Pearl Jam concert experience. But maybe we should be celebrating the vanquishing of our demons, and finding passage into safer harbors. I had the following thought watching the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremony on my bootleg periscope feed - especially with the Alive - Given to Fly - Betterman run of songs.
In the story of grunge Eddie was cast as a martyr. That mystique was one of the things that drew us to him, and to the music. The scene was full of them. But what makes Pearl Jam's story special, possibly even unique, is that this messiah didn't have to die to liberate his followers. Instead it was the followers who helped saved the messiah. The night of the Hall of Fame I was so incredibly grateful for that as much as the music and the history. And that's why songs like Alive or Betterman can have their meaning almost entirely inverted from the original intent, and feel as powerful as ever. Maybe even more.
In the face of the alternative that is, I think, something to celebrate
I wrote the following piece for Red Mosquito and wanted to share it here as well.
Like most (white) American men of a certain age, grunge was my formative musical experience, and the music resonated with incredible power. Even my lesser lights in the big 6 grunge bands (I always included STP and the Pumpkins alongside the Seattle groups-it feels right spiritually, if not geographically) were still tremendous talents, and it seemed impossible that this much amazing music could come out of one brief moment in time (one I assumed would extend on into forever). 1991-1996 saw Ten, Nevermind, Gish, Badmotorfinger, Core, Dirt, Vs, Siamese Dream, In Utero, Jar of Flies, Vitalogy, Purple, Mellon Collie…, No Code, Tiny Music…, Alice in Chains, Down on the Upside. 6 bands. 5 years. 17 classic albums. Four genre-defining singers coming out of the same god damned town. What a time to find yourself first opening up to music. This became the benchmark against which we all came to measure what music could do. Even as we left these songs behind we expected new music to make us feel the same way.
During those formative years, struggling with the transition into adulthood, I found the darkness and the bleakness in grunge utterly compelling. It felt true, in a way that joy and light and peace and acceptance never did – at least not without being earned, purified through suffering. But one of the things that spoke to me the most about Pearl Jam, which I wasn't able to articulate until I was a bit older and started writing and talking about them in a systemic way, was the optimism that lay beneath the music, though you’d miss it on a superficial listen. Grunge reflected a lost soul searching for a companion to walk with them down a long, dark, lonely, road. In Pearl Jam's music, that ultimately lead someplace better, even if it lay someplace beyond the limits of your current vision. But for Kurt Cobain, Layne Staley, Scott Weiland, and now Chris Cornell, there was no way out. The road itself was the final destination.
Cornell's story is really striking in this regard. He's someone who seemed to make it out, and maybe he did, but the darkness and the demons stayed with him. Even if they were under control, all it takes is that one slip, that one bad night, that one mistake. And his death, or really what his death demonstrated, has made the music more vital. As I've grown up, started a family, a career, and have generally lived a very happy life there's a way in which the grunge themes that seemed so powerful became, if not nostalgic, at least historical. Something you interacted with from a distance and as memory. These songs were still great, but I had to remind myself that they were great. They were no longer living truths. As a result, I had a tendency to become ever so slightly dismissive of them. A little overwrought and over the top. Music for white suburban kids struggling with first world problems. Music for teenagers that play an important part in your transition to adulthood, but that are best left behind afterwards. Fondly recalled, but lacking the same fierce commitment and deadly seriousness.
I love Pearl Jam in part because their music grew past those themes. Themes of alienation became social and political, or personal in a way that reflects a life being lived. When there was a grievance it was a legit grievance with a world that failed to live up to its promise, rather than sullen personal, static, experience. And the best songs were inspirational - reflecting a desire to be a better person, to live a better life. They were written from a place of wisdom and experience - from someone who completed their journey and made it out alive, rather than from someone still stuck on the long, lonely road. And even if I preferred the songs written on the road, I was glad that they moved past it. The fact that they grew, that they weren't stuck in that moment, made those earlier moments feel more authentic - an important part of a larger, more vivid picture. A central chapter in a complex and moving arc, rather than the story in its entirety. It's why a middle aged album like Lightning Bolt, filled with middle aged themes like love, fear of loss, the inadequacy of what we leave behind, both resonant with me and make the earlier work simultaneously more vital.
It’s my experience, but it comes from a place of satisfaction, of having lived, thus far anyway, a good life. Pearl Jam speaks to my experiences. Chris Cornell's tragic death has been a stark and powerful reminder that not everyone escapes, or that you can escape and find yourself wandering back in a loop that feels closed, even if it isn't. That these songs no longer speak to my direct experience doesn't mean they have nothing to say. And in the last few days I find these lonelier, angrier, more hopeless and nihilistic songs have recaptured much of the dark power and terrible beauty lost with age and experience.
Chris Cornell was not one of my favorites in the grunge pantheon, but he was still in the pantheon. I was drawn more to Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and Alice in Chains. But there were no shortage of his songs that I adored, and Soundgarden was my younger brother’s first favorite band. I have vivid memories of him listening to my copy of Superunknown on my Sony discman on long driving vacations with my parents, and feeling proud of my work as a big brother. And given the place that grunge holds in the formation of my identity during those critical years, and Chris’s place within that story, his death hurts, and hurts more for seeing how raw that wound is for so many other people.
I have also received enough 'Eddie is the last man standing' texts from my friends that I find myself incredibly grateful for the fact that he is, especially since, 20+ years ago, he seemed the person the most likely to go first. Some fans have bemoaned the celebratory atmosphere that defines the modern Pearl Jam concert experience. But maybe we should be celebrating the vanquishing of our demons, and finding passage into safer harbors. I had the following thought watching the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremony on my bootleg periscope feed - especially with the Alive - Given to Fly - Betterman run of songs.
In the story of grunge Eddie was cast as a martyr. That mystique was one of the things that drew us to him, and to the music. The scene was full of them. But what makes Pearl Jam's story special, possibly even unique, is that this messiah didn't have to die to liberate his followers. Instead it was the followers who helped saved the messiah. The night of the Hall of Fame I was so incredibly grateful for that as much as the music and the history. And that's why songs like Alive or Betterman can have their meaning almost entirely inverted from the original intent, and feel as powerful as ever. Maybe even more.
In the face of the alternative that is, I think, something to celebrate
One that I don't feel is Chris not being one of his favorites. He was one of my favorites. Soundgarden is my #2 and he produced lots of great stuff on his own and with Audioslave. This is without a doubt the worst celebrity death ever for me. From a purely selfish standpoint, I feel a loss here that I did not feel with the others. This was in part because I was counting on more opportunities to see Soundgarden, his acoustic shows, and maybe even Audioslave. In part simply because I was a bigger fan of his than the others. And in part because I thought he was beyond the angst, chemicals, etc. that brought some of the others down...not be be insensitive, but Weiland outlived my expectations, Layne was in rough shape, and Kobain had a rough life compounded by chemical use. I knew Chris had his ups and downs but I had the impression he was in a good place. I feel like this is the one that shouldn't have happened. When a celebrity dies, you can feel bad for their family...but this is the one for which I feel most bad for "me." Selfish? Yes...but he's the one that most impacted me and who's talent I most admired.
I was five days removed from seeing Soundgarden live when I heard the news. It was a festival (i.e., short setlist, idiot drunks, shit show all the way) but I am very glad I had that one last chance.
1995 Milwaukee 1998 Alpine, Alpine 2003 Albany, Boston, Boston, Boston 2004 Boston, Boston 2006 Hartford, St. Paul (Petty), St. Paul (Petty) 2011 Alpine, Alpine 2013 Wrigley 2014 St. Paul 2016 Fenway, Fenway, Wrigley, Wrigley 2018 Missoula, Wrigley, Wrigley 2021 Asbury Park 2022 St Louis 2023 Austin, Austin
I am worried about Ed - he must feel so lonely. Being the only singer left...it must feel overwhelming. I hope he has people around him that love him.
the media are the only ones that think Ed is the only one left. he has loads of contemporaries, peers, and friends in the business, he is not limited to the "big four".
I am worried about Ed - he must feel so lonely. Being the only singer left...it must feel overwhelming. I hope he has people around him that love him.
the media are the only ones that think Ed is the only one left. he has loads of contemporaries, peers, and friends in the business, he is not limited to the "big four".
I know, but at some point it has to feel alienating. Or maybe that's not the right word. When you see what the pressure has done to the others who were in similar shoes. I hope I'm wrong. Just want him to be ok.
"This is without a doubt the worst celebrity death ever for me. " Me too brother...1 day at a time. People always feel like with celebrity death, I didn't know these guys REALLY, so why should it effect me? But man has it...I dont think an hour goes by I dont think about it. Ive been lucky enough to see Soundgarden and Chris solo alot of times, maybe 2 dozen or something from 92-now...it feels like my youth has died and is now gone forever.
People who arent as big fans as us dont get it, we follow these guys around the world, we feel like they are ours, our friends, our brothers...
I hope to be able to get thru some of the music without crying soon.
"This is without a doubt the worst celebrity death ever for me. " Me too brother...1 day at a time. People always feel like with celebrity death, I didn't know these guys REALLY, so why should it effect me? But man has it...I dont think an hour goes by I dont think about it. Ive been lucky enough to see Soundgarden and Chris solo alot of times, maybe 2 dozen or something from 92-now...it feels like my youth has died and is now gone forever.
People who arent as big fans as us dont get it, we follow these guys around the world, we feel like they are ours, our friends, our brothers...
I hope to be able to get thru some of the music without crying soon.
yeah I was so excited when Soundgarden reunited. I thought King Animal was a great album....compare it to Lightning Bolt and it's hard to say it doesn't blow it away. I would catch Cornell when he had solo shows but I never was a huge Audioslave fan. I am a huge RATM fan and obviously a big SG fan but it just didn't do much for me.
I saw Soundgarden at the Palace in Louisville after King Animal came out. Just awesome....then we saw them again with Nine Inch Nails in Michigan at an outdoor venue. That was the last time I saw them until they played Indy two weeks ago....a week later Chris was dead.
I'm guessing they have some recorded material for a new album that will be released at some point.
Remember the Thomas Nine !! (10/02/2018) The Golden Age is 2 months away. And guess what….. you’re gonna love it! (teskeinc 11.19.24)
1998: Noblesville; 2003: Noblesville; 2009: EV Nashville, Chicago, Chicago 2010: St Louis, Columbus, Noblesville; 2011: EV Chicago, East Troy, East Troy 2013: London ON, Wrigley; 2014: Cincy, St Louis, Moline (NO CODE) 2016: Lexington, Wrigley #1; 2018: Wrigley, Wrigley, Boston, Boston 2020: Oakland, Oakland:2021: EV Ohana, Ohana, Ohana, Ohana 2022: Oakland, Oakland, Nashville, Louisville; 2023: Chicago, Chicago, Noblesville 2024: Noblesville, Wrigley, Wrigley, Ohana, Ohana
The profile pics of Chris Cornell, Soundgarden, Temple of the Dog and Audioslave have been changed: they are black now.
Fell on Black Days just keeps playing in my head. The themes I had always implied to myself in that song are reality now (How could I know this would be my fate?)... very sad time all around.
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
Awesome analogy. I turn to sports radio lately to try to just not hear any of it.
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
Awesome analogy. I turn to sports radio lately to try to just not hear any of it.
Thank you. I, like you, have definitely been avoiding listening to many things; the tributes just bring on tears. Such a heavy time, and such a surprise. I said earlier that I keep searching for answers, when I know there will be none, because nobody knows but him. What a ripple has been created here - one soul affecting so many- the same in life as in death.
The profile pics of Chris Cornell, Soundgarden, Temple of the Dog and Audioslave have been changed: they are black now.
Fell on Black Days just keeps playing in my head. The themes I had always implied to myself in that song are reality now (How could I know this would be my fate?)... very sad time all around.
Yeah, that's the song that has been in my head the most, too. But then I listen to "The Day I Tried to Live" and it gives hope.
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
For sure..... Although has anyone heard Chris's brother sing? Peter Cornell is also a singer and he sounds almost exactly like Chris. Of course I'm not suggesting that is a replacement for Chris or anything, but ... just sayin'. I had no clue until the other day that Chris had a brother who sings at all, let alone one whose voice sounds almost just like his.
Post edited by PJ_Soul on
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
For sure..... Although has anyone heard Chris's brother sing? Peter Cornell is also a singer and he sounds almost exactly like Chris. Of course I'm not suggesting that is a replacement for Chris or anything, but ... just sayin'. I had no clue until the other day that Chris had a brother sings at all, let alone one whose voice sounds almost just like his.
I had no idea...could be a great solution if Soundgarden gets into the RRHOF.
1995 Milwaukee 1998 Alpine, Alpine 2003 Albany, Boston, Boston, Boston 2004 Boston, Boston 2006 Hartford, St. Paul (Petty), St. Paul (Petty) 2011 Alpine, Alpine 2013 Wrigley 2014 St. Paul 2016 Fenway, Fenway, Wrigley, Wrigley 2018 Missoula, Wrigley, Wrigley 2021 Asbury Park 2022 St Louis 2023 Austin, Austin
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
For sure..... Although has anyone heard Chris's brother sing? Peter Cornell is also a singer and he sounds almost exactly like Chris. Of course I'm not suggesting that is a replacement for Chris or anything, but ... just sayin'. I had no clue until the other day that Chris had a brother sings at all, let alone one whose voice sounds almost just like his.
I found out a few years back when a video was posted online of Chris bringing his brother out on stage to sing something with him. Can't recall what it was, but was eye opening.
He was the wise sage of the 4 to me. Ed right behind him.
I'm in the same line of thinking that something went very wrong (2 pills on an empty stomach after an exhausting show). And that he was completely out of his mind with no prior thoughts. Thats my hope anyway.
All speculation but i will participate..2 ativan for a grown man that has been on the meds regularly im not sure would send a man to these lengths. I dont know MG of the drug but i would expect there is more than 2 Ativan.
Fuuuuuck man...ya know it would be better if this stuff didnt come out for the world to know and then judge. "In my time of dying, I want nobody to mourn / All I want for you to do is take my body home."
Daily Mail credibility = ZERO. Worse than TMZ. I would hesitate to start spreading this stuff until multiple confirmatory articles have been released.
Mansfield 06.28.2008 | Boston 05.17.2010 | Boston 06.19.2011 EV solo | Wrigley Field 07.19.2013 | Worcester 10.15.2013 | Worcester 10.16.2013 | Hartford 10.25.2013
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This is a very difficult time and while it’s understandable to look for answers to make sense of this tragedy please be mindful of what you post. Respectfully, please leave gossip where it belongs (not here). Thank you.
Daily Mail credibility = ZERO. Worse than TMZ. I would hesitate to start spreading this stuff until multiple confirmatory articles have been released.
TMZ initially reported it - Daily Mail simply picked it up from them. And actually, TMZ is very rarely wrong (and if they are, they retract/correct. Whatever other issues people have with them, they are actually very careful about accuracy. There is no actual reason to assume TMZ is reporting garbage, aside from the fact that they focus on celebrity news). Anyway, yeah, they're just citing a source close to the investigation, so there is still some wait and see about it, as with all breaking stories. Only toxicology reports will give definite answers, as TMZ acknowledged. In any case, the truth is the truth. The truth is not offensive and it does not set out to hurt anybody. The truth will set you free, or so they say.
Post edited by PJ_Soul on
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
Daily Mail credibility = ZERO. Worse than TMZ. I would hesitate to start spreading this stuff until multiple confirmatory articles have been released.
TMZ is reporting it too - Daily Mail simply picked it up from them. And actually, TMZ is very rarely wrong (and if they are, they retract/correct. Whatever other issues people have with them, they are actually very careful about accuracy. There is no actual reason to assume TMZ is reporting garbage, aside from the fact that they focus on celebrity news). Anyway, yeah, they're just citing a source close to the investigation, so there is still some wait and see about it, as with all breaking stories. In any case, the truth is the truth. The truth is not offensive and it does not set out to hurt anybody. The truth will set you free, or so they say.
I agree. For me IF this turns out to be verified, doesnt change the sadness of it for all involved but as humans its our nature to look till things make sense. The original facts didnt make sense. Again, a terrible loss for his family.
Comments
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
PJ - Auckland 2009; Alpine Valley1&2 2011; Man1, Am'dam1&2, Berlin1&2, Stockholm, Oslo & Copenhagen 2012; LA, Oakland, Portland, Spokane, Calgary, Vancouver, Seattle 2013; Auckland 2014, Auckland1&2 2024
EV - Canberra, Newcastle & Sydney 1&2 2011
Like most (white) American men of a certain age, grunge was my formative musical experience, and the music resonated with incredible power. Even my lesser lights in the big 6 grunge bands (I always included STP and the Pumpkins alongside the Seattle groups-it feels right spiritually, if not geographically) were still tremendous talents, and it seemed impossible that this much amazing music could come out of one brief moment in time (one I assumed would extend on into forever). 1991-1996 saw Ten, Nevermind, Gish, Badmotorfinger, Core, Dirt, Vs, Siamese Dream, In Utero, Jar of Flies, Vitalogy, Purple, Mellon Collie…, No Code, Tiny Music…, Alice in Chains, Down on the Upside. 6 bands. 5 years. 17 classic albums. Four genre-defining singers coming out of the same god damned town. What a time to find yourself first opening up to music. This became the benchmark against which we all came to measure what music could do. Even as we left these songs behind we expected new music to make us feel the same way.
During those formative years, struggling with the transition into adulthood, I found the darkness and the bleakness in grunge utterly compelling. It felt true, in a way that joy and light and peace and acceptance never did – at least not without being earned, purified through suffering. But one of the things that spoke to me the most about Pearl Jam, which I wasn't able to articulate until I was a bit older and started writing and talking about them in a systemic way, was the optimism that lay beneath the music, though you’d miss it on a superficial listen. Grunge reflected a lost soul searching for a companion to walk with them down a long, dark, lonely, road. In Pearl Jam's music, that ultimately lead someplace better, even if it lay someplace beyond the limits of your current vision. But for Kurt Cobain, Layne Staley, Scott Weiland, and now Chris Cornell, there was no way out. The road itself was the final destination.
Cornell's story is really striking in this regard. He's someone who seemed to make it out, and maybe he did, but the darkness and the demons stayed with him. Even if they were under control, all it takes is that one slip, that one bad night, that one mistake. And his death, or really what his death demonstrated, has made the music more vital. As I've grown up, started a family, a career, and have generally lived a very happy life there's a way in which the grunge themes that seemed so powerful became, if not nostalgic, at least historical. Something you interacted with from a distance and as memory. These songs were still great, but I had to remind myself that they were great. They were no longer living truths. As a result, I had a tendency to become ever so slightly dismissive of them. A little overwrought and over the top. Music for white suburban kids struggling with first world problems. Music for teenagers that play an important part in your transition to adulthood, but that are best left behind afterwards. Fondly recalled, but lacking the same fierce commitment and deadly seriousness.
I love Pearl Jam in part because their music grew past those themes. Themes of alienation became social and political, or personal in a way that reflects a life being lived. When there was a grievance it was a legit grievance with a world that failed to live up to its promise, rather than sullen personal, static, experience. And the best songs were inspirational - reflecting a desire to be a better person, to live a better life. They were written from a place of wisdom and experience - from someone who completed their journey and made it out alive, rather than from someone still stuck on the long, lonely road. And even if I preferred the songs written on the road, I was glad that they moved past it. The fact that they grew, that they weren't stuck in that moment, made those earlier moments feel more authentic - an important part of a larger, more vivid picture. A central chapter in a complex and moving arc, rather than the story in its entirety. It's why a middle aged album like Lightning Bolt, filled with middle aged themes like love, fear of loss, the inadequacy of what we leave behind, both resonant with me and make the earlier work simultaneously more vital.
It’s my experience, but it comes from a place of satisfaction, of having lived, thus far anyway, a good life. Pearl Jam speaks to my experiences. Chris Cornell's tragic death has been a stark and powerful reminder that not everyone escapes, or that you can escape and find yourself wandering back in a loop that feels closed, even if it isn't. That these songs no longer speak to my direct experience doesn't mean they have nothing to say. And in the last few days I find these lonelier, angrier, more hopeless and nihilistic songs have recaptured much of the dark power and terrible beauty lost with age and experience.
Chris Cornell was not one of my favorites in the grunge pantheon, but he was still in the pantheon. I was drawn more to Pearl Jam, Nirvana, and Alice in Chains. But there were no shortage of his songs that I adored, and Soundgarden was my younger brother’s first favorite band. I have vivid memories of him listening to my copy of Superunknown on my Sony discman on long driving vacations with my parents, and feeling proud of my work as a big brother. And given the place that grunge holds in the formation of my identity during those critical years, and Chris’s place within that story, his death hurts, and hurts more for seeing how raw that wound is for so many other people.
I have also received enough 'Eddie is the last man standing' texts from my friends that I find myself incredibly grateful for the fact that he is, especially since, 20+ years ago, he seemed the person the most likely to go first. Some fans have bemoaned the celebratory atmosphere that defines the modern Pearl Jam concert experience. But maybe we should be celebrating the vanquishing of our demons, and finding passage into safer harbors. I had the following thought watching the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame ceremony on my bootleg periscope feed - especially with the Alive - Given to Fly - Betterman run of songs.
In the story of grunge Eddie was cast as a martyr. That mystique was one of the things that drew us to him, and to the music. The scene was full of them. But what makes Pearl Jam's story special, possibly even unique, is that this messiah didn't have to die to liberate his followers. Instead it was the followers who helped saved the messiah. The night of the Hall of Fame I was so incredibly grateful for that as much as the music and the history. And that's why songs like Alive or Betterman can have their meaning almost entirely inverted from the original intent, and feel as powerful as ever. Maybe even more.
In the face of the alternative that is, I think, something to celebrate
One that I don't feel is Chris not being one of his favorites. He was one of my favorites. Soundgarden is my #2 and he produced lots of great stuff on his own and with Audioslave. This is without a doubt the worst celebrity death ever for me. From a purely selfish standpoint, I feel a loss here that I did not feel with the others. This was in part because I was counting on more opportunities to see Soundgarden, his acoustic shows, and maybe even Audioslave. In part simply because I was a bigger fan of his than the others. And in part because I thought he was beyond the angst, chemicals, etc. that brought some of the others down...not be be insensitive, but Weiland outlived my expectations, Layne was in rough shape, and Kobain had a rough life compounded by chemical use. I knew Chris had his ups and downs but I had the impression he was in a good place. I feel like this is the one that shouldn't have happened. When a celebrity dies, you can feel bad for their family...but this is the one for which I feel most bad for "me." Selfish? Yes...but he's the one that most impacted me and who's talent I most admired.
I was five days removed from seeing Soundgarden live when I heard the news. It was a festival (i.e., short setlist, idiot drunks, shit show all the way) but I am very glad I had that one last chance.
2013 Wrigley 2014 St. Paul 2016 Fenway, Fenway, Wrigley, Wrigley 2018 Missoula, Wrigley, Wrigley 2021 Asbury Park 2022 St Louis 2023 Austin, Austin
www.headstonesband.com
People always feel like with celebrity death, I didn't know these guys REALLY, so why should it effect me?
But man has it...I dont think an hour goes by I dont think about it. Ive been lucky enough to see Soundgarden and Chris solo alot of times, maybe 2 dozen or something from 92-now...it feels like my youth has died and is now gone forever.
People who arent as big fans as us dont get it, we follow these guys around the world, we feel like they are ours, our friends, our brothers...
I hope to be able to get thru some of the music without crying soon.
I saw Soundgarden at the Palace in Louisville after King Animal came out. Just awesome....then we saw them again with Nine Inch Nails in Michigan at an outdoor venue. That was the last time I saw them until they played Indy two weeks ago....a week later Chris was dead.
I'm guessing they have some recorded material for a new album that will be released at some point.
The Golden Age is 2 months away. And guess what….. you’re gonna love it! (teskeinc 11.19.24)
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2016: Lexington, Wrigley #1; 2018: Wrigley, Wrigley, Boston, Boston
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2022: Oakland, Oakland, Nashville, Louisville; 2023: Chicago, Chicago, Noblesville
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Fell on Black Days just keeps playing in my head. The themes I had always implied to myself in that song are reality now (How could I know this would be my fate?)... very sad time all around.
and no one ever will again... there are so many lyrics that he wrote that have been just ringing out in my mind for the past week. Little light bulbs I wish I could turn off.
Thank you. I, like you, have definitely been avoiding listening to many things; the tributes just bring on tears. Such a heavy time, and such a surprise. I said earlier that I keep searching for answers, when I know there will be none, because nobody knows but him. What a ripple has been created here - one soul affecting so many- the same in life as in death.
2013 Wrigley 2014 St. Paul 2016 Fenway, Fenway, Wrigley, Wrigley 2018 Missoula, Wrigley, Wrigley 2021 Asbury Park 2022 St Louis 2023 Austin, Austin
www.headstonesband.com
www.headstonesband.com
"In my time of dying, I want nobody to mourn / All I want for you to do is take my body home."
I would hesitate to start spreading this stuff until multiple confirmatory articles have been released.
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