Degenerates Unite!! Must be on the list to enter and 18!

Empty Glass

I'm sure empty combat rolled and is ok.

Wife made a shit ton of baked beans, I was already ripe today from last nights shenanigans...I'll be setting off my own fireworks once I get to bed around 2

Amongst the Ani

My brother also made my wife a new bumper sticker. She was pissed at me and is threatening to withhold my real fireworks tonight when she saw it. Some crap about her polish family freaking out at her when they don't understand it is a joke and that she didn't go bi (nothing wrong with that of course, they are just traditional catholic). My reponse, they are polish. Like they would understand that. Anyways, if anyone wants one of these send me a PM with your address and I will mail you one after I see my brother next.

SD48277

My thoughts go out to Mrs. Empty, and hope she survives tonight.

Empty Glass

Amongst the Ani

If my wife only knew what my idea was for her new bumper sticker:

"My other ride is a big black dildo" with a picture underneath of a big black schlong. Insult to me yes, but funny none the less. I got to get me one of those special printers for bumper stickers and mugs. He also made me a mug for my boss that has the Cardinals logo and has the word Cheaters underneath. My boss is from St Louis and loves his Cardinals so it should win me some bonus points at raise and bonus time. I am a massochist yes.

I went to a specialty wine/beer store and got some imported German Heffeweizens. I got my wife some wine imported from England so we can celebrate our greatest military victories for the holiday and get fucked up. I am about to go pull the grill out front and get this party started. She is off getting rid of our free loader for good (thank fucking god) and should be feeling randy later. My wife doesn't realize I know how to get my fireworks. A bottle of wine, I take my shirt off revealing all my hard work at the gym and the panties will drop. This should be a very memmoarble 4th. Beer, steak, shit being blown up, awesome fireworks and then different awesome fireworks to cap the night. Hope yours is going great as well.

Empty Glass

" A bottle of wine, I take my shirt off revealing all my hard work at the gym and the panties will drop. "

Fucking line reads like Hemingway...beautiful

Empty Glass

This Dead show is about to start...time to get the fire rolling

RKCNDY

I read that as "so far I've blown up 3 kids" ...

Amongst the Ani

Enjoy the Dead show. I have some Avengened Sevenfold blaring. Grill is out front warming up. Cooler is soaking in bleach (kids used it last and it has a funky smell). Beers should be cracked in 15 minutes.

I have a Facebook account just for my Marine buddies as they set up a page for everyone to keep in touch. My wife is a friend on mine of course. I posted her car with the bumper sticker with the pic going to friends of friends so all her friends and her Mother will see it. I'm hoping she doesn't notice until tomorrow or I may have to go Defcom 3 for my fireworks and talk sexy to her later. Either that or pull out the tequila. Tequila might work better.

Amongst the Ani

Shit, wife saw the post. Came over and called me an asshole. I assume that is why. Who the fuck really knows with women though. Going to cut up some lemons now for the tequila shots. Getting dark soon. First batch of fireworks to start shortly. To top it off spell check isnt turned on for my new laptop. Pint number 3 about to be cracked. If there are any more posts be ready for some gibbersh.

I hope the final dead show is kicking ass.

Empty Glass

Great show tonight, not the last show though. I'll do this one more time tomorrow night. Monday should suck.

Have fun blowing shit up. Sneak up behind your wife and kiss her on the neck. Whisper something kinky

F Me In The Brain

Sounds like a kickass AZ party! Tell her you could put one on your car that reads I love baseball but that doesn't mean you are a baseball player. I also love carpet munching.
My other ride is a bbd is a great idea....my wife would kick my balls in if I put that on her car. Would be worth it. If you make one of those I would do it!

oftenreading

Well, we can certainly tell who's been drinking tonight, can't we? Good luck later tonight, Ani! I also love how your spelling has markedly deteriorated today.

By the way, my Canadian 4th of July bbq went fantastic, not that anyone's asking.

Empty Glass

I'm almost certain Arizona has been blown off the map.

Amongst the Ani

Holy shit I am fucked up. Pint number 6 just went down the hatch along with a few shots. The one stingy neighbor at the end of the street threatened to call the cops. Bitch. We just moved further down the court as she was worried about her precoius car. Fuck her. She could have simply asked for a cease fire to move it into the god damn garage rather than threaten cops. The wife is walking the f'ing dog for me. Fucking Boomer got his revenge for all the fireworks by locking me out when I didnt have the keys to the house on me. He jumped at the front door and locked it. I had to scale the house to get in through the second floor balcony. Thank god that door was unlocked or I would have had to resort to breaking a window. God damnit Boomer. I even feed him steak tonight. He wasnt freaked out at all. He wanted to come join the party. Degenerite dog so I should have known.

The wife is not nearly drunk enough so it may be a sad disapointment to the end of my night. She got mad when I wouldn't come in at 10. More tequila shots for the bar! Who wants a tequila shot with an Ani? And I tried hard to not misspell anything so please mock my drunk ass for what I missed as it all looks good to me right now. Then again Betty White would look good right now. Beer goggles are on and in full effect.

Happy 4th you degenrites!. May freedom ring across the globe.

Glad the Dead show rocked.

deadendp

I don't suspect we'll be hearing from Ani until far later in the day.

whispering hands

Amongst the Ani said:

Sorry empty, little emptys shoot didn't open all the way so he didn't make it. He was a causlty of war and broke his neck upon landing. The two ISIS paratroopers did have their shoots open all the way and decended back to earth beautifully. Fucking ISIS.

So far I have blown up 3 of the kids toys with M80's. One of the neighbors is having a party and some middle aged hag tried to come out and yell at me for the noise. She got a very nice response of "cant wait to see you out tonight when the whole court is setting this stuff off' response. I then proceeded to blast 10 M80's and a handful of firecrackers off as fast as I could to piss her off. That neighbor is actually really cool (she comes and smokes pot with us, gets really wasted at the block parties) so not worried about it. If the kids were not with me I would have had another response for her that started with the middle finger and would have ended with a fuck you.

Seriously need to be your designated driver at a show one day!! Lol

SD48277

Boomer locked you out? Aaahhahaha! And I totally would have done a shot with you if I was awake then. Next time.

Empty Glass

Amongst the Ani

Why am I awake and I feel like hell. My house is dead quiet. Even Boomer is sleeping still yet I lay here hungover by my loneseome self. Donuts sound good. Dunkin Donuts is calling and that call must be answered.

Wobbie

imalive said:

"100 new"??????

tomorrow I catch up and defend myself over that crocs w/socks photo.

another 38 behind (on top of 100) and still no time to deal with you degerenerates. As soon as I finish this beer, it's off to yet another function. it has been a very degenerate weekend.

Empty Glass

imalive said:

imalive said:

"100 new"??????

tomorrow I catch up and defend myself over that crocs w/socks photo.

another 38 behind (on top of 100) and still no time to deal with you degerenerates. As soon as I finish this beer, it's off to yet another function. it has been a very degenerate weekend.

All you need to know is Ani's wife is a carpet muncher

Amongst the Ani

And empty ate too many beans.

Empty Glass

Amongst the Ani said:

And empty ate too many beans.

I prefer carpet

Wobbie

deadendp said:

Yes we did. Because I feel bad to leave the boys out, here is the story behind said poop story:

A lil background. We're a two building gallery but of course, the public bathroom is in our building. (Can I tell you the joy that brings me? ) The building I'm in is a converted house. What serves as the public bathroom is a half bath in the middle of the downstairs main room. It is also our box storage area.

Chick comes in and asks where the bathroom is. (She was in her 20's.) She goes, she does her thing. I'm at the front counter doing some other things and a stench hits me. They call me super sniffer at work because I have an amazingly strong sense of smell. Perfumes give me an instant headache, but I work with a girl who will vomit at the smell of such bodily functions that was offending me at that moment. She was in the front room with the pooper, so I went to check the situation out.

There it was. Clearly a double flusher that had been ignored. Door wide open. Fan turned off. The whole gallery was starting to experience the scent of what that chick laid down in there.

I might add, it was a bit offensive. I applaud her for being so willing to deposit such wreckage in a public loo, but could bitch slap her for leaving it for the rest of us to experience. It's not just leaving it in an employee bathroom as a joke. She left it so that the ENTIRE store smelled of her shit. Oh yes she did. And I might add, she seemed not aware or rather uncaring of the green fog that was quickly permeating the rooms.

I resorted to dances with poop spray. I do believe we're running with Red Honeysuckle or some such sort. I can't actually leave the can behind for the public to use. They overuse and run me out by using 1/2 a can for one lil trip. So I tripped through. I killed the odor. I obviously flushed again (within earshot), closed the door (they could hear), and remedied the situation before Toni started dry heaving.

I battled the public poo-ing and I won!

catching up....good story. 100x better than last's vacation slides and sore feet.

Wobbie

northerndragon said:

Here we see the middleagus crocwearingus, an elusive species rarely seen out side of their habitat "The Suburbs". Luckily we were able to tag this one and we can now track their movements.

Otherwise known as who let Rob out?

ha ha. very. fucking. funny.

couldn't be me because.....1) I have hair and scrapes all over my legs and 2) I wear my crocs "straps up"

so, ha fucking ha.

Wobbie

RKCNDY said:

21 then...that includes the extra point.

wow

Wobbie

whispering hands said:

Found this book at work today.. About pissed myself laughing.. No one else understood. My boss now thinks I'm crazy!

"I went to prison and now my ani's raw"

Wobbie

deadendp said:

F Me In The Brain said:

I couldn't imagine marrying someone that was so much like me -- I am an opposites person. My buddies are similar; never dated any women for any time that were similar. I would expect her to score lower.
Like her just the way she is.
Actually it wouldn't hurt my feelings if I could bump up her score by adding #1 and #4.
Would be mighty strange if she could sing 'You've Got Another Thing Coming' or 'War Pigs' word for word with me.

And RK, that bug needs to be alive, girl!

why do we abbreviate rick and cindy as RK? shouldnt it be RC?

northerndragon

imalive said:

northerndragon said:

Here we see the middleagus crocwearingus, an elusive species rarely seen out side of their habitat "The Suburbs". Luckily we were able to tag this one and we can now track their movements.

Otherwise known as who let Rob out?

ha ha. very. fucking. funny.

couldn't be me because.....1) I have hair and scrapes all over my legs and 2) I wear my crocs "straps up"

so, ha fucking ha.

This does not help your cause. If it's not you do you recognize him as one of your herd?