Maddening Malapropisms

PJ_Soul

hedonist said:

SD48277 said:

I have a friend who says "ax" instead of "ask," as in: "I ax him what he was doing."
Makes my eyes twitch every time she says it.

Drives me crazy - like "libary". How are you missing a key letter?!

I actually just assume that anyone who says "libary" is downright stupid. Can't help it. I judge immediately. :P I even have an issue with "Febuary"... but I don't think that means people are stupid... but only because it's so normalized. It's February, dammit!! (and yes, dammit is in the dictionary )

Wobbie

HesCalledDyer said:

imalive said:

HesCalledDyer said:

My last name... four simple letters... easy to say.

90% of the time I get Dwyer or Dryer. Aggravates the living piss out of me! I don't understand why it's so difficult to get it correct.

how the hell did you make those letters RED????????

Simple html code:
text goes here

simple HTML code is an oxymoron. simple? really?

SD48277

imalive said:

SD48277 said:

I have a friend who says "ax" instead of "ask," as in: "I ax him what he was doing."
Makes my eyes twitch every time she says it.

"Go ax your mother"

My eyes just twitched.

ldent42

I say Ice coffee. About 3-4 years ago I got corrected (for the first time in my life, mind you) which was when I learned you're supposed to pronounce the D.
I've decided I don't give a shit, and I continue to enjoy my ice coffee during the warmer months.

Wobbie

ldent42 said:

I say Ice coffee. About 3-4 years ago I got corrected (for the first time in my life, mind you) which was when I learned you're supposed to pronounce the D.
I've decided I don't give a shit, and I continue to enjoy my ice coffee during the warmer months.

Ice-T agrees.

lazloblue

I work with a lady that says "Pass the Puck". I told her the proper expression is "Pass the Buck" she says...Well I never heard it that way....Makes me nuts!!!

florence151

Hate to hear when someone sasy he is going to have a prostrate exam.
Prostate!

Hobbes

florence151 said:

Hate to hear when someone sasy he is going to have a prostrate exam.
Prostate!

Who Princess

florence151 said:

Hate to hear when someone sasy he is going to have a prostrate exam.
Prostate!

Do you have to be prostrate to have one?

whispering hands

lazloblue said:

I work with a lady that says "Pass the Puck". I told her the proper expression is "Pass the Buck" she says...Well I never heard it that way....Makes me nuts!!!

lol me being me, I actually know the history behind this saying if you ever want to shut her up! Lol

Amongst the Ani

Hobbes said:

imalive said:

I hate when people say "if I'm the NBA" "if I'm congress" " if I'm San Antonio" etc.

If I'm the 10c....

Does 'If I'm Rob work

Who Princess said:

florence151 said:

Hate to hear when someone sasy he is going to have a prostrate exam.
Prostate!

Do you have to be prostrate to have one?

If a man ever sees his prostate doctor more than once a year it counts as an affair.

Last-12-Exit

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

whispering hands

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

Yeah irregardless is a one word oxymoron!! It's not even a real word!! That bugs me too, even though it took me years to figure out, it was simply, regardless.

HesCalledDyer

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

A friend of mine says this ALL the time. I correct him EVERY time. He still continues to say it incorrectly. The dialog always goes like this:

Him: "Irregardless, blah blah blah."
Me: "Ahem, regardless."
Him: "Ok. Regardless, blah blah blah. Whatever."

And the next time he says it, he goes right back to irregardless again.

Amongst the Ani

Can we rename this title as Elitist Bitch Department. My god, listen to yourselves. Irregardless (spell check says its a word so screw you all) of what you think your degenerate cards are being reviewed. If H2TM is retiring from his perch we will need a new leader and you all are disqualified.

SD48277

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

Yes!! Huge pet peeve of mine.

PJ_Soul

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

That one's so common it was added to the dictionary some time ago (Merriam-Webster and Oxford), so we can't hate on that one anymore.... The evolution of language is sometimes sad.

jeffbr

PJ_Soul said:

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

That one's so common it was added to the dictionary some time ago (Merriam-Webster and Oxford), so we can't hate on that one anymore.... The evolution of language is sometimes sad.

I was just going to mention that it had been added as a word due to common usage. That pisses me off even more than the non-word itself. Words should have meaning. Words DO have meaning. How can a word mean one thing when it is constructed to mean exactly the opposite? That would be like saying empty now means full because 1,000,000 idiots started saying empty every time they meant full. Good gods.

SD48277

PJ_Soul said:

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

That one's so common it was added to the dictionary some time ago (Merriam-Webster and Oxford), so we can't hate on that one anymore.... The evolution of language is sometimes sad.

It's been added to the dictionary? Regardless, I'm still going to hate on it.

PJ_Soul

jeffbr said:

PJ_Soul said:

Last-12-Exit said:

Irregardless bugs the shit out of me. Why can't you just say regardless?

That one's so common it was added to the dictionary some time ago (Merriam-Webster and Oxford), so we can't hate on that one anymore.... The evolution of language is sometimes sad.

I was just going to mention that it had been added as a word due to common usage. That pisses me off even more than the non-word itself. Words should have meaning. Words DO have meaning. How can a word mean one thing when it is constructed to mean exactly the opposite? That would be like saying empty now means full because 1,000,000 idiots started saying empty every time they meant full. Good gods.

Totally! I'm surprised that could and couldn't haven't been made into the same word in the dictionary, given how many people say "I could care less."
Oh really? You could??

whispering hands

Lmao! Wow.. I had no idea that irregardless was now a word.. This actually saddens me almost as much as L.A. Making a plea to the CSBOE, to make Ebonics Acceptable as it was so widely recognized by children of the inner city. Even the adult parents that SPOKEebonics too shot that one down!!

Another sad day in the word of language...

Wobbie

cdysinge said:

Hobbes said:

imalive said:

I hate when people say "if I'm the NBA" "if I'm congress" " if I'm San Antonio" etc.

If I'm the 10c....

Does 'If I'm Rob work

that absolutely works (you should be so lucky)....you can be another person (singular); you can't be a country, a basketball team, a government agency, etc.

Wobbie

Who Princess said:

florence151 said:

Hate to hear when someone sasy he is going to have a prostrate exam.
Prostate!

Do you have to be prostrate to have one?

naw, you just lean forward

HesCalledDyer

Bullshit. Irregardless is not a word. I don't care what the dictionary says. We KNOW it's not. I'm not gonna stand by idly and accept this.

Amongst the Ani

Merriams doesn't seem to happy to have it listed:

Definition of IRREGARDLESS
nonstandard
: regardless
Usage Discussion of IRREGARDLESS
Irregardless originated in dialectal American speech in the early 20th century. Its fairly widespread use in speech called it to the attention of usage commentators as early as 1927. The most frequently repeated remark about it is that “there is no such word.” There is such a word, however. It is still used primarily in speech, although it can be found from time to time in edited prose. Its reputation has not risen over the years, and it is still a long way from general acceptance. Use regardless instead

merriam-webster.com/dictionary/irregardless

Word is my dictionary. If spell check will pick it up and correct it that is a word.

brianlux

davidtrios said:

I used to work with a guy, who aside from being dumb, used these often. Two examples are: you're the goat between for go between. Another, he who laughs first, laughs last.

These really grind my gears.

A common mistake but I do like this version:

"He who laughs first
Didn't get the Joke."
-Paul Westerberg

florence151

LOL

Typo king!

Hobbes said:

florence151 said:

Hate to hear when someone sasy he is going to have a prostrate exam.
Prostate!

oftenreading

HesCalledDyer said:

Could/should/would/might/must OF... drives me up a mother fucking wall!

It's HAVE for fuck's sake! Or, at the very least, ~'ve. The sad part is I see adults type 'of' all the time now. I mean, when did everyone over the age of 18 suddenly forget what they were taught in 1st grade English class? And furthermore, why aren't teachers correcting everyone under the age of 18 when they get it incorrect?

You wouldn't type "I of left" so why in holy hell would you say "I should of left"??

/end rant

So - a creative example on the Porch today - "would of have..."

Last-12-Exit

I dont give much credence to the Webster dictionary since it added ain't. Unless I'm playing scrabble.

HesCalledDyer

"For Pete/Christ sakes."

It's "For Pete's/Christ's sake."