Assaulted

PJ_Soul

badbrains said:

brianlux said:

I'd like to clear up the race issue business here quick like. When I posted my story here my intent was to tell the story honestly. In my initial post, I described the young men as "black" the way I described the color of their vehicle. It's my habit as a writer and former teacher to add detail when writing. But as I wrote this it occurred to me that someone might think that by saying they were black that I might have a problem with black people which I don't. So when I mentioned the fact that the guys working in the store were black I thought maybe if I pointed out that these guys were really cool, which they were, would clear up that issue. I probably shouldn't have made either description which would have prevented this from being an issue at all and, besides, any of you who know even a little about me know I am not a bigot. If there was ANY prejudice involved here at all the only thing that might be a factor is that maybe the guy who punched me doesn't like white people in his neighborhood but I don't know if that is so and I did not make that claim. I think it's more likely that he has a problem with female canines because it is the word "bitch" that he spewed at me. As for my biases I will say this: I have a big problem with people who threaten and/or do harm to others for no reason whatsoever.

PLEASE, let's not make this a race issue thread.

Wow, brian, dnt even sweat it bro. NO ONE here at all thinks that you're racist or a bigot. I would've described it the same exact way as you. You have no issue here with it being a race "thing". That's the last thing that should be on your mind buddy.

No, of course in don't think you're a bigot Brian. I was more thinking about the general issue in the US and the culture of racial tension, insomuch that anyone in your situation might have found that their mind went in that direction in some way, however unintentional. I realize now that it was an issue that shouldn't have been brought up at that moment - I am guilty of bad timing (at best). I'm sorry about that.

PJ_Soul

brianlux said:

Doc says head seems to be ok and seems confident it's so. Now if I could just chase away the spin cycle thinking. I'm growing impatient with my mind that way. Just want to move on. Well, at least no major injuries- I'm glad for that.

Brian, you could be suffering from kind of PTSD (understandably - you were attacked and your family was threatened!) .... Perhaps talking to a counselor or going to a victims of violence group could really help you get through this? I know doing something like that isn't always the easiest thing, but I know for a fact that it can really help even when you think it won't.

Halifax2TheMax

Ah, excuse me Mr. Lux? Perhaps a sojourn over to the lounge car is in order?

Peace.

brianlux

PJ_Soul said:

badbrains said:

brianlux said:

I'd like to clear up the race issue business here quick like. When I posted my story here my intent was to tell the story honestly. In my initial post, I described the young men as "black" the way I described the color of their vehicle. It's my habit as a writer and former teacher to add detail when writing. But as I wrote this it occurred to me that someone might think that by saying they were black that I might have a problem with black people which I don't. So when I mentioned the fact that the guys working in the store were black I thought maybe if I pointed out that these guys were really cool, which they were, would clear up that issue. I probably shouldn't have made either description which would have prevented this from being an issue at all and, besides, any of you who know even a little about me know I am not a bigot. If there was ANY prejudice involved here at all the only thing that might be a factor is that maybe the guy who punched me doesn't like white people in his neighborhood but I don't know if that is so and I did not make that claim. I think it's more likely that he has a problem with female canines because it is the word "bitch" that he spewed at me. As for my biases I will say this: I have a big problem with people who threaten and/or do harm to others for no reason whatsoever.

PLEASE, let's not make this a race issue thread.

Wow, brian, dnt even sweat it bro. NO ONE here at all thinks that you're racist or a bigot. I would've described it the same exact way as you. You have no issue here with it being a race "thing". That's the last thing that should be on your mind buddy.

No, of course in don't think you're a bigot Brian. I was more thinking about the general issue in the US and the culture of racial tension, insomuch that anyone in your situation might have found that their mind went in that direction in some way, however unintentional. I realize now that it was an issue that shouldn't have been brought up at that moment - I am guilty of bad timing (at best). I'm sorry about that.

No worries, PJ_Soul. It's a huge issue and one well worth discussing- maybe on AMT? I'm not upset that you brought it up. And yes, a little counseling (as opposed to ongoing "Hollywood" counseling in which the same issue is discussed over and over with no action taken) is always a good idea but because I trained students in counseling I would probably spend too much of the time critiquing their work, LOL. My main issue right now is stopping the spin cycle and dealing with the anger- not killing the anger- just trying to turn it into something useful and non-destructive. Listening to New York Dolls seems to help. Weird, I know- they just seem to be my on sound track this week.

OMGkatwoman

You have every right to feel angry Brian, most of us were po'd that this happened when we heard about it and it's a perfectly normal reaction. It's also good to hear that your ok and everything checked out good at the doctors.

hedonist

brianlux said:

No worries, PJ_Soul. It's a huge issue and one well worth discussing- maybe on AMT? I'm not upset that you brought it up. And yes, a little counseling (as opposed to ongoing "Hollywood" counseling in which the same issue is discussed over and over with no action taken) is always a good idea but because I trained students in counseling I would probably spend too much of the time critiquing their work, LOL. My main issue right now is stopping the spin cycle and dealing with the anger- not killing the anger- just trying to turn it into something useful and non-destructive. Listening to New York Dolls seems to help. Weird, I know- they just seem to be my on sound track this week.

I hope you can not only deal with the anger, but release it too.

Sounds like you're getting there, little by little, and I'm glad music is helping.

Hell, do whatever you must!

I was gonna suggest visiting a local animal shelter if there's one near you. I always find it healing, those interactions, and it gets me outside of myself for awhile, if that makes sense.

badbrains

hedonist said:

brianlux said:

No worries, PJ_Soul. It's a huge issue and one well worth discussing- maybe on AMT? I'm not upset that you brought it up. And yes, a little counseling (as opposed to ongoing "Hollywood" counseling in which the same issue is discussed over and over with no action taken) is always a good idea but because I trained students in counseling I would probably spend too much of the time critiquing their work, LOL. My main issue right now is stopping the spin cycle and dealing with the anger- not killing the anger- just trying to turn it into something useful and non-destructive. Listening to New York Dolls seems to help. Weird, I know- they just seem to be my on sound track this week.

I hope you can not only deal with the anger, but release it too.

Sounds like you're getting there, little by little, and I'm glad music is helping.

Hell, do whatever you must!

I was gonna suggest visiting a local animal shelter if there's one near you. I always find it healing, those interactions, and it gets me outside of myself for awhile, if that makes sense.

Dude, hedonist's local animal shelter is dead on! Awesome suggestion. Love going and visiting cats in the shelters.

brianlux

Great idea, though I must say my home is my animal shelter. Annie the (a rescue cat) has been amazing. She has always been a bit of a wild thing (which actually is quite cool) but ever since we got home Early Sunday morning she as been right there with us in such amazing ways. Had to work today so right now home sound sooooo good. Only an hour then we go home and will be smothered by love and a few stray black cat hairs. :-)

Thanks again everyone. Hope you're all doing well.

njnancy

I'm so glad you followed up with your neurologist and even gladder that he said you weren't injured badly.
I think it's natural to go over the incident and the why's and what if's and to feel anger, especially since it just happened. I tend to dwell in my head on things, despite advice to the contrary. i never really come to conclusions; just relive things over and over and wind up feeling angry, sad or worst of all, betrayed. So it is a constant mind fuck with no useful outcome. I don't know if you meditate or do any kind of exercise or yoga - but meditation can quiet and focus your thoughts and stop the spinning for a short time at least. Putting on headphones and blasting whatever music quiets my mind helps too. Don't over think it - do as i say, not as i do. Thanks for the updates. >-

hedonist

brianlux said:

Great idea, though I must say my home is my animal shelter. Annie the (a rescue cat) has been amazing. She has always been a bit of a wild thing (which actually is quite cool) but ever since we got home Early Sunday morning she as been right there with us in such amazing ways. Had to work today so right now home sound sooooo good. Only an hour then we go home and will be smothered by love and a few stray black cat hairs. :-)

Thanks again everyone. Hope you're all doing well.

Yeah, I hear you. Home is sanctuary and cliched or not, where the heart is - along with the animals. Our two are the best therapy sometimes. Just thought the shelter thing would be good for you AND the cats and dogs...but you do what you gotta do

Asterisk on the Street

Brian,
Glad to hear your neurologist said you are ok. I have been thinking of you and your family. Hope you are doing better each day and the spin cycle fades away.

brianlux

Thanks, Asterisk. Yeah, things are settling down. Kind of trashed our vacation plans but we're all doing well enough. It's actually good to have some down time at home.