Creative cursing, swearing - all for fun

rollings

Listen here, Mr. or Ms. sh*t-your-drawers-all-day-long-at-work-and-then-at-the-train-station-too..

if I wanted any brown crap from you, I'd wipe it off your refrigerator door handle. or television set. or your whatever collection

goodnight now,

I SAID GOODNIGHT NOW,

P.S. your oven mitts are shitty

rollings

homo genius

evsgjamm

You ravenous Pudding Knuckle! The amount of time I would have to invest to get you to understand the ABC's of creative cursing is an unfathomable quantum leap.

You spaghetti hammer.

rollings

evsgjamm said:

You ravenous Pudding Knuckle! The amount of time I would have to invest to get you to understand the ABC's of creative cursing is an unfathomable quantum leap.

You spaghetti hammer.

I am crying because you are so right. ravenous pudding knuckle . I fathomenly vehemonently cave. how'd you freakin know is all I ask as I crawl away, you pumpernickel toiletpaper wannabe toad smeller

evsgjamm

TOAD SMELLER!!!!

I can't even begin to donkey puke on your ear ya hella smella planetary yella fella.

rollings

you cant even begin? you mean, you can't even, not really?
that's what I thought, hog sloth. that's right,
beat em off, slow pee and bed whiz

evsgjamm

bed whiz!!!!!

You flat-faced owl.

You fish-eyed flamingo.

You old poop stain.

Eat a fly-infested macaroni salad ya strung-out pug. I've seen sturgeon quicker than you, ya pickly-minded sub-particulate skunk scum. Your back hair is worth more than your bank account ya bare-balled goat head.. ya turkey-necked toe jammin whale blubbin pork spore. Take a bath!

rollings

my mother didn't raise me to be no pork spore, i can tell you that much, embroidered bumpy pile munch

evsgjamm

you Towel faced slug, how dare we bring the mothers into this amputated conversation of the shit mites. I've got more vitamin C than you do, ya scurvy boned tooth decayed mud flap.

rollings

....beats a toilet-paper encrusted face and nose that you then have to scrape off using your shitty and ugly spatula.
that's right. your shitty and ugly spatula has gas and is covered in toilet paper from your face

Pap

You're more mixed-up than a feather in a whirlwind. ~ Foghorn Leghorn

evsgjamm

My butt smells better than your face ya butt head. And I'll mix you up like a lemonade stand ya frog-faced phlegm-eater.

evsgjamm

You Creationist trout hole blasters! Swear unto you in this dire time of needed gaping pleasures!! you must undo yourselves into the skies of strife and trouble! Your gator faced uncle is snoozing under a blanketed steaming pile of shoe laces and face packs. Take a nail and shove it under your bedside table! You curtain dump! Youuuuu tickle trunks!!! YOUUUU flipper skunks!!!!

evsgjamm

Stinky breathed humpface!!!!! (welcoming all patrons from my rant in the Porch about MFC's new single "Time Can't Wait." Hello. Creatively curse away please, ya tied down waffle bangers)

evsgjamm

Ok, listen up you frogs knobs.
It's been over 2 stink-ass years since any of you mal-faced piglets commented your egg-brained spew.

Proceed with fuckery, ya snot guzzling parasites.

1ThoughtKnown

mcgavinj said:

I mutter "well fuck me in a goats ass!" No idea why

This is from Adam Sandler’s second album. The goat is tied to a truck with a “two foot fucking rope” and the kids are going to the “ragoo festival”
https://www.google.ca/amp/s/amp.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/9ryzuz/adam_sandler_the_goat_i_loved_this_whole_cd_when/

1ThoughtKnown

@evsgjamm 😂
You are creative man.

I liked the one I used to yell from the bench at hit and turtle guys like Matt Tkachuk. “Hey _________ You’re half the man your mother was!”

No swearing but it is creative lol

evsgjamm

LOL good one!
Love it, ya wet-faced salad painter.

rollings

Hey yo-- out of my way, mullet humper.

Looks like your dogs were using your lips for their back yard again....how many times do I have to tell you that the toilet is not your interactive scratch and sniff plaything?

Anyway, while you're down there, do give my regards to your mom 

blacknblu

evsgjamm said:

Humorous curses: Get creative, show us your favorite "weird" curses either you've created or heard someone else say - GO! .... You flat-faced owl.

My Dad: That guy is dumber than a sack of hammers
Me as a Dad: That guy is an asshat
Me: Fuckity fuck mcfuckerson

evsgjamm

That's crapfully creative ya boiling pool of ball sweat 

evsgjamm

@rollings

The level of garbage in your pickle hole is equaled only by the staunchy stench in your crammed cornhole.

blacknblu

Advice passed down from my Grandfather: Never get mad at a man if your wife cheats. Give him $5 to complete the transaction.

rollings

mr. jamm 

you seem to have a penchant for pickles and pickly thing. I think it's because you are  green, curved, and bumpy and were left in a whiskey incubator.

stuckinline

This is a great thread! Thanks to all.

evsgjamm

@rollings lol

@stuckinline welcome to the party ya scum-cunt!

tempo_n_groove

Here is my addition to the thread.

When shit gets really hairy it is no longer called Tom Foolery but Phineas Fuckery...

Thank you...

evsgjamm

lol

Good one, ya hairy nut

evsgjamm

rollings said:

 P.S. your oven mitts are shitty

This makes my rock-filled head laugh a lot. 
It's also the dumbest thing I've ever heard, you leather-sucking pig licker.

rollings

Your oven mitts are shitty and you dance like a prone cow

So keep your hands on the wheel instead of your shitty dance moves.