Assholes: A Theory

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  • Last-12-Exit
    Last-12-Exit Charleston, SC Posts: 8,661
    I drive really slow in the ultra fast lane, while people behind me are going insane. I use public toilets and piss on the seat, I walk around in the summertime sayin how about this heat.

    http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=UrgpZ0fUixs
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Last-12-Exit wrote:
    I drive really slow in the ultra fast lane, while people behind me are going insane. I use public toilets and piss on the seat, I walk around in the summertime sayin how about this heat.

    http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=UrgpZ0fUixs
    hedonist wrote:
    Also, I'm surprised no one's posted Denis Leary's Asshole video - good shit! I would, but we've got some other music going here at the moment.

    Good thread :thumbup:
    :mrgreen:
  • Last-12-Exit
    Last-12-Exit Charleston, SC Posts: 8,661
    hedonist wrote:
    Last-12-Exit wrote:
    I drive really slow in the ultra fast lane, while people behind me are going insane. I use public toilets and piss on the seat, I walk around in the summertime sayin how about this heat.

    http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=UrgpZ0fUixs
    hedonist wrote:
    Also, I'm surprised no one's posted Denis Leary's Asshole video - good shit! I would, but we've got some other music going here at the moment.

    Good thread :thumbup:
    :mrgreen:
    Lol. I skimmed thru to see if it was mentioned. I didn't see your post. I guess that makes me an asshole!
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    chadwick wrote:
    Thirty Bills Unpaid wrote:
    Attending concerts... one is immersed among assholes.

    From one of the very first experiences attending a concert- trying to attain one of the limited edition concert posters- one comes across assholes from all categories. The one in particular that irritates the hell out of me is the Category 3 that you make the mistake of getting behind in the merch mob. After you finally get a sniff of the counter... you sit there and have to watch the poster stack dwindle down as the Category 3 Asshole hums and haws about whether or not to go with option #6 t-shirt or option #11 t-shirt. She will text images to her friends- awaiting their opinion and she will engage the seemingly eager merch person in meaningless dialogue before she finally decides to go with option #4.

    After selecting option #4... then the Category 3 asshole will deliberate between a large size or an XL size. Trying both on and texting the 'look' to her friends... she will await a response before deciding to purchase.

    Things don't end as she is advised to get the XXL. The Cat 3 asshole then loudly provides a play-by-play as she fumbles with the debit machine: usually forgetting her password twice... sometimes getting declined- to which the Cat 3 will cuss at the machine, the merch worker, and the bank as she fumbles through her purse diggin for another card (starting the entire process again!).

    Right around this time, the stack of posters has dwindled to a slim thickness and one begins to do a head count, estimated time of arriving at service, and an approximation of the remaining stock. This is about the time when frustration can rear its head and... if patience is worn and liquor is present... comments may begin. Remember... for effectively dealing with a Category 3 Asshole... one is highly advised to ignore at all costs. The consequences of not doing so can be drastic.

    It should be noted that the moment I discover I have gotten myself stuck behind a Cat 3... I try and act as if I have been bumped into the next stream that leads to another spot at the counter. There are times when this subtle maneuver will pay off for a guy... but sometimes the herd is thick and the opportunity will not prevent itself without becoming a Cat 3 myself.

    good story & writing. this example of assholes made me feel terrible for common sense carrying people. this short description of concert going actually had suicidal thoughts flashing in my head as being one of the herd is a ...........

    fuck.

    some times why can't a guy slap the fuck out of someone? im not saying lay hands on a woman. no.

    but one should be fully able to say, "look, you're a fucking dumb fucking prick, now get your fucking shit & move on" & "texting your dumb ass friends is bullshit in this merchandise purchasing line with 900 fuckers behind you, you fucking no brain having piece of "

    Some of us actually go out of our way to be courteous... yet others simply either: couldn't give a shit or do not understand the concept. Both of these scenarios leave much to be desired.

    And people wonder why they get punched out sometimes?
    "My brain's a good brain!"

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