Repellent 9-Year-Old Crushed At Suspension Of Favorite Baseball Player A-Rod
SPORTS NEWS IN BRIEF • Sports • Baseball • ISSUE 49•32 • Aug 6, 2013
NEW YORK—Following Major League Baseball’s decision to suspend the Yankees third baseman for 211 games, 9-year-old Alex Rodriguez fan and utterly repellent little asshole David Polaski expressed his heartbreak Tuesday that he won’t be able to see his favorite player in action until 2015. “I love A-Rod—he’s the best, and now I don’t get to watch him at all,” said the insufferable and entitled little prick, who sources confirmed has absolutely no friends and is hated by virtually everyone who knows or has ever met him. “The MLB is stupid. A-Rod’s the most awesome player ever. This sucks.” The repulsive, self-absorbed brat added that he’s just glad he can still watch his second-favorite player, Yankees relief pitcher Joba Chamberlain.
Repellent 9-Year-Old Crushed At Suspension Of Favorite Baseball Player A-Rod
SPORTS NEWS IN BRIEF • Sports • Baseball • ISSUE 49•32 • Aug 6, 2013
NEW YORK—Following Major League Baseball’s decision to suspend the Yankees third baseman for 211 games, 9-year-old Alex Rodriguez fan and utterly repellent little asshole David Polaski expressed his heartbreak Tuesday that he won’t be able to see his favorite player in action until 2015. “I love A-Rod—he’s the best, and now I don’t get to watch him at all,” said the insufferable and entitled little prick, who sources confirmed has absolutely no friends and is hated by virtually everyone who knows or has ever met him. “The MLB is stupid. A-Rod’s the most awesome player ever. This sucks.” The repulsive, self-absorbed brat added that he’s just glad he can still watch his second-favorite player, Yankees relief pitcher Joba Chamberlain.
Alex Rodriguez may not be the most hated person in his camp anymore. The New York Post's Page Six gossip column is reporting that A-Rod has added criminal defense attorney Joe Tacopina to his legal team, a guy that has been called "the most hated lawyer in New York."
Rodriguez, of course, is staring at a possible 211-game suspension from Major League Baseball in connection to the Biogenesis scandal, a suspension he's assembling an all-star legal team to help him appeal. A-Rod already retained David Cornwell, who led Ryan Braun's successful appeal against an MLB suspension in 2012.
Now A-Rod has reportedly added Tacopina, who has famously defended an accused rapist (Kenneth Moreno) and an accused cop killer (Lillo Brancato), among others in New York. And let's not forget the ever-notorious Joran van der Sloot. You remember him from the Natalee Halloway case.
Here's more on the reported A-Rod-Tacopina marriage from The Post:
Tacopina, who relishes a high-profile case and has defended the likes of acquitted ex-NYPD officer Kenneth Morenoand and Hiram Monserrate, has joined Rodriguez’s team and is expected to make a series of media appearances — including interviews with ESPN and the morning shows — to defend A-Rod next week. A source close to the slugger’s camp told us, “Joe is a fighter, and that is what Alex needs right now. He has been brought on to reinforce the trial team, there’s a possibility this could go all the way to federal court."
No doubt A-Rod needs a bulldog in his corner, and Tacopina is the doesn't-give-a-damn-what-you-think-about-him criminal defense attorney who can wage war on Rodriguez's behalf.
In a 2011 profile of Tacopina by the New York Post, one prosecutor said, "He's slick, he's got a big ego, and he'll represent any scumbag." The Post's profile of the attorney continues:
To his critics, Tacopina is the devil's advocate, an Italian-American version of Johnnie Cochran, down to the flashy style. He wears window-pane suits and a $6,500 Panerai watch. He's on TV more than Jeff Probst. He loves Italian soccer. He drives a Maserati. He sails his own 49-foot yacht.
And why not? To the victor go the spoils.
"If you look at the scorecard, I don't think anyone's had as many wins as I've had over the last three years," said Tacopina, who charges $750 an hour. "I don't ever quit."
When A-Rod's camp said it would "pursue all legal remedies available to Alex" after his suspension, they weren't just talking. They went out and, apparently, got a shark.
Comments
I think the list will be getting shorter tomorrow.
Repellent 9-Year-Old Crushed At Suspension Of Favorite Baseball Player A-Rod
SPORTS NEWS IN BRIEF • Sports • Baseball • ISSUE 49•32 • Aug 6, 2013
NEW YORK—Following Major League Baseball’s decision to suspend the Yankees third baseman for 211 games, 9-year-old Alex Rodriguez fan and utterly repellent little asshole David Polaski expressed his heartbreak Tuesday that he won’t be able to see his favorite player in action until 2015. “I love A-Rod—he’s the best, and now I don’t get to watch him at all,” said the insufferable and entitled little prick, who sources confirmed has absolutely no friends and is hated by virtually everyone who knows or has ever met him. “The MLB is stupid. A-Rod’s the most awesome player ever. This sucks.” The repulsive, self-absorbed brat added that he’s just glad he can still watch his second-favorite player, Yankees relief pitcher Joba Chamberlain.
http://ca.sports.yahoo.com/blogs/mlb-bi ... 16017.html
Alex Rodriguez may not be the most hated person in his camp anymore. The New York Post's Page Six gossip column is reporting that A-Rod has added criminal defense attorney Joe Tacopina to his legal team, a guy that has been called "the most hated lawyer in New York."
Rodriguez, of course, is staring at a possible 211-game suspension from Major League Baseball in connection to the Biogenesis scandal, a suspension he's assembling an all-star legal team to help him appeal. A-Rod already retained David Cornwell, who led Ryan Braun's successful appeal against an MLB suspension in 2012.
Now A-Rod has reportedly added Tacopina, who has famously defended an accused rapist (Kenneth Moreno) and an accused cop killer (Lillo Brancato), among others in New York. And let's not forget the ever-notorious Joran van der Sloot. You remember him from the Natalee Halloway case.
Here's more on the reported A-Rod-Tacopina marriage from The Post:
Tacopina, who relishes a high-profile case and has defended the likes of acquitted ex-NYPD officer Kenneth Morenoand and Hiram Monserrate, has joined Rodriguez’s team and is expected to make a series of media appearances — including interviews with ESPN and the morning shows — to defend A-Rod next week. A source close to the slugger’s camp told us, “Joe is a fighter, and that is what Alex needs right now. He has been brought on to reinforce the trial team, there’s a possibility this could go all the way to federal court."
No doubt A-Rod needs a bulldog in his corner, and Tacopina is the doesn't-give-a-damn-what-you-think-about-him criminal defense attorney who can wage war on Rodriguez's behalf.
In a 2011 profile of Tacopina by the New York Post, one prosecutor said, "He's slick, he's got a big ego, and he'll represent any scumbag." The Post's profile of the attorney continues:
To his critics, Tacopina is the devil's advocate, an Italian-American version of Johnnie Cochran, down to the flashy style. He wears window-pane suits and a $6,500 Panerai watch. He's on TV more than Jeff Probst. He loves Italian soccer. He drives a Maserati. He sails his own 49-foot yacht.
And why not? To the victor go the spoils.
"If you look at the scorecard, I don't think anyone's had as many wins as I've had over the last three years," said Tacopina, who charges $750 an hour. "I don't ever quit."
When A-Rod's camp said it would "pursue all legal remedies available to Alex" after his suspension, they weren't just talking. They went out and, apparently, got a shark.