"Bullied"

BamaPJFan

I noticed another thread on this forum discussing whether or not being gay is genetic, a choice, or possibly a combination of both. The organization where I work has just co-produced and released a documentary about a landmark, pioneering case on gay bullying in schools. It is being premiered in Washington D.C. at an event in early October. Prior to this premiere, it will be shown in a limited release (August 25-August 31) in Los Angeles at The Landmark theatre on W. Pico Boulevard.

My office watched the film, along with the real life subject of the film, Jamie Nabozny, on Tuesday of this week here in Montgomery, Alabama. Jamie spoke to us when the film was over. Bill Brummel, the documentary's producer, was in town as well with Jamie.

Some of you might be familiar with Ben Harper. Harper was the supporting act for Pearl Jam for several dates last fall in North America and in Australia. Ben lended us his song called "I'll Rise" for this film. Ben actually came to our office earlier this summer to learn more about the film and to give us his blessing with the song.

http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/n ... in-schools

fife

BamaPJFan wrote:

I noticed another thread on this forum discussing whether or not being gay is genetic, a choice, or possibly a combination of both. The organization where I work has just co-produced and released a documentary about a landmark, pioneering case on gay bullying in schools. It is being premiered in Washington D.C. at an event in early October. Prior to this premiere, it will be shown in a limited release (August 25-August 31) in Los Angeles at The Landmark theatre on W. Pico Boulevard.

My office watched the film, along with the real life subject of the film, Jamie Nabozny, on Tuesday of this week here in Montgomery, Alabama. Jamie spoke to us when the film was over. Bill Brummel, the documentary's producer, was in town as well with Jamie.

Some of you might be familiar with Ben Harper. Harper was the supporting act for Pearl Jam for several dates last fall in North America and in Australia. Ben lended us his song called "I'll Rise" for this film. Ben actually came to our office earlier this summer to learn more about the film and to give us his blessing with the song.

http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/n ... in-schools

to this day, i still believe that bully based on sexual preference should be considered a hate crime.

gimmesometruth27

fife wrote:

BamaPJFan wrote:

I noticed another thread on this forum discussing whether or not being gay is genetic, a choice, or possibly a combination of both. The organization where I work has just co-produced and released a documentary about a landmark, pioneering case on gay bullying in schools. It is being premiered in Washington D.C. at an event in early October. Prior to this premiere, it will be shown in a limited release (August 25-August 31) in Los Angeles at The Landmark theatre on W. Pico Boulevard.

My office watched the film, along with the real life subject of the film, Jamie Nabozny, on Tuesday of this week here in Montgomery, Alabama. Jamie spoke to us when the film was over. Bill Brummel, the documentary's producer, was in town as well with Jamie.

Some of you might be familiar with Ben Harper. Harper was the supporting act for Pearl Jam for several dates last fall in North America and in Australia. Ben lended us his song called "I'll Rise" for this film. Ben actually came to our office earlier this summer to learn more about the film and to give us his blessing with the song.

http://www.splcenter.org/get-informed/n ... in-schools

to this day, i still believe that bully based on sexual preference should be considered a hate crime.

violent crime against gays, lesbians, and transsexuals is a hate crime. depending on the severity of the bullying it can easily be prosecuted as a hate crime in addition to the other charges of battery, assault, etc.

haffajappa

There have been a few really publicized hate crimes here - though people have tried to debate whether or not they classify as such, which in my mind there is absolutely no doubt that they ARE hate crimes.

one incident involved 2 men holding hands walking downtown when some guy yelled obsceneties from across the street and then ended up crossing and sucker punching one of the men holding hands...
http://www.cbc.ca/canada/british-columb ... ml?ref=rss

another man was in a bar playing pool when a guy hit him over the head with an object because he "apparently" came on to him but witness said the gay guy was just minding his own business playing pool. he suffered permanent brain damage
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/nat ... le1669511/

if those aren't hate crimes i don't know what is.

chadwick

i remember in 7th grade some dude called me a fagget.
we fought on the stairs.
i got in many fights in school.
lots of bullies, lots of stupid shits, lots of i don't fuck around, lots of im an idiot.

good stuff.

justam

I think it's hate too.

I wonder how long it's going to take for people to wake up about this issue? Homosexuals have been treated as second class (or lower) citizens for far too long.

Blockhead

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

justam

Just because "bullying has been going on since forever" does not mean it needs to continue. It's ugly in all it's forms.

Why don't you feel compassion for people who are treated badly?

Blockhead

justam wrote:

Just because "bullying has been going on since forever" does not mean it needs to continue. It's ugly in all it's forms.

Why don't you feel compassion for people who are treated badly?

I do feel compassion for people who are treated badly, but being bullied is pretty simplistic. Its a growing pain that almost all kids experience. I know i did...

Hugh Freaking Dillon

if that's your attitude on it, then no, in fact, you didn't experience it.

HeidiJam wrote:

justam wrote:

Just because "bullying has been going on since forever" does not mean it needs to continue. It's ugly in all it's forms.

Why don't you feel compassion for people who are treated badly?

I do feel compassion for people who are treated badly, but being bullied is pretty simplistic. Its a growing pain that almost all kids experience. I know i did...

Hugh Freaking Dillon

so has racism. should we just ignore that too since it's just a minority's right of passage or something?

HeidiJam wrote:

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

BamaPJFan

HeidiJam wrote:

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

It's a chronic problem that has gone ignored for far too long. I remember how it adversely affected a few classmates of mine and how it probably haunts them to this day. Bullying won't be entirely stopped, but there must be be proactive measures in place (namely in the home where parents are doing a sorry job in today's society) to mitigate the damages as much as possible.

haffajappa

HeidiJam wrote:

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

Who said everyone is a victim?
Victims of bullying are victims... I don't see how anyone can disagree.

So if your kids come home with black eyes or broken bones from a bully, I'm assuming you'd be okay with that.

that's messed up...

haffajappa

Paul David wrote:

if that's your attitude on it, then no, in fact, you didn't experience it.

HeidiJam wrote:

justam wrote:

Just because "bullying has been going on since forever" does not mean it needs to continue. It's ugly in all it's forms.

Why don't you feel compassion for people who are treated badly?

I do feel compassion for people who are treated badly, but being bullied is pretty simplistic. Its a growing pain that almost all kids experience. I know i did...

I don't think they would have experienced it either.
At least not to the extent that some people do.

Blockhead

haffajappa wrote:

HeidiJam wrote:

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

Who said everyone is a victim?
Victims of bullying are victims... I don't see how anyone can disagree.

So if your kids come home with black eyes or broken bones from a bully, I'm assuming you'd be okay with that.

that's messed up...

Dude, you are a clown...
if you knew anything about parenting or being a parent, you wouldn't make such a stupid comment.
If you are involved in your child's life, you will not have children coming home with black eyes or broken bones out of nowhere. Bullying is a progressive thing, and if you had a clue on being a parent you would/should know when and how to prevent further bullying. Its alot apart our evolutions as children, call it survival of the fittest aif you will. We all have probably experienced bullying in some stage, it happens to all of us.. Its acutally a good character builder and offers the first stages where you stand up for your self or beliefs. THere are extremes in all cases, but bullying is almost unavoidable. Its a part of childhood development. People need to quit making it a bigger issue than it is. Bullying would also be ineffective if parents were move involved in the daily lives of their children, its not hard to tell when something is wrong with your kid...
Quit being such a pusscake.

catefrances

HeidiJam wrote:

haffajappa wrote:

HeidiJam wrote:

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

Who said everyone is a victim?
Victims of bullying are victims... I don't see how anyone can disagree.

So if your kids come home with black eyes or broken bones from a bully, I'm assuming you'd be okay with that.

that's messed up...

Dude, you are a clown...
if you knew anything about parenting or being a parent, you wouldn't make such a stupid comment.
If you are involved in your child's life, you will not have children coming home with black eyes or broken bones out of nowhere. Bullying is a progressive thing, and if you had a clue on being a parent you would/should know when and how to prevent further bullying. Its alot apart our evolutions as children, call it survival of the fittest aif you will. We all have probably experienced bullying in some stage, it happens to all of us.. Its acutally a good character builder and offers the first stages where you stand up for your self or beliefs. THere are extremes in all cases, but bullying is almost unavoidable. Its a part of childhood development. People need to quit making it a bigger issue than it is. Bullying would also be ineffective if parents were move involved in the daily lives of their children, its not hard to tell when something is wrong with your kid...
Quit being such a pusscake.

i have never experienced bullying in my life. my character was built quite solid without it. and for you to say that bullying is a good character builder is just insane. to my mind you are saying children who are bullied... who 'allow' themselves to be bullied are weak and have no character(whatever the hell that means). and that is just not the case.

bullying is never okay, be in in the playground or the office and it should never be seen as just a part of growing up. this just keeps the cycle going.

DreamOfAngels

HeidiJam wrote:

Bullying is a progressive thing, and if you had a clue on being a parent you would/should know when and how to prevent further bullying. Its alot apart our evolutions as children, call it survival of the fittest aif you will. We all have probably experienced bullying in some stage, it happens to all of us.. Its acutally a good character builder and offers the first stages where you stand up for your self or beliefs. THere are extremes in all cases, but bullying is almost unavoidable. Its a part of childhood development. People need to quit making it a bigger issue than it is. Bullying would also be ineffective if parents were move involved in the daily lives of their children, its not hard to tell when something is wrong with your kid...
Quit being such a pusscake.

Wow. It absolutely is something that can be addressed and should be. I am shocked you actually say "survival of the fittest" or it's a "good charcter builder". It's absolutely unnecessary. It messes people up for the rest of their lives and leads some to commit suicide. It's disrespectful.

So, you say if I have a clue as a parent I should know when and how to prevent further bullying? A child at school follows my daughter, stares at her non-stop with these evil eyes that can pierce your soul, intimidates her on the play ground, pretends to be a road block between my child and any playground equipment. My child wants her to stop this behavior. The teachers are told. The principal is told. They assure us they will watch but since she isn't actually hurting anyone they won't do anything. A month later at the pool - the bully swam under water grabbed my childs ankle and pulled her under and wouldn't let go. My child was apologizing later for kicking this girl but she couldn't breath! I don't encourage treating people disrespectfully in return for their behavior but I did tell her that if someone is trying to drown her she should kick as hard as she can to survive. Hmmph... The other parents were told about this. Nothing changed. How am I to prevent it in the future? If the girl would not have let go and my child died, is that appropriate? She just wasn't fit to survive?

Teaching my child to grow elephant skin so she won't hurt anymore really isn't what life should be about. Granted, we can't make people be nice but there can be incentives to encourage that behavior (hence the reason the punishment is greater for driving intoxicated than it is for littering a piece of chewed gum).

Wow. I can let a lot of posts go but this one hit me. Hopefully I'm reading it all wrong. Please let me know.

catefrances

DreamOfAngels wrote:

Wow. It absolutely is something that can be addressed and should be. I am shocked you actually say "survival of the fittest" or it's a "good charcter builder". It's absolutely unnecessary. It messes people up for the rest of their lives and leads some to commit suicide. It's disrespectful.

So, you say if I have a clue as a parent I should know when and how to prevent further bullying? A child at school follows my daughter, stares at her non-stop with these evil eyes that can pierce your soul, intimidates her on the play ground, pretends to be a road block between my child and any playground equipment. My child wants her to stop this behavior. The teachers are told. The principal is told. They assure us they will watch but since she isn't actually hurting anyone they won't do anything. A month later at the pool - the bully swam under water grabbed my childs ankle and pulled her under and wouldn't let go. My child was apologizing later for kicking this girl but she couldn't breath! I don't encourage treating people disrespectfully in return for their behavior but I did tell her that if someone is trying to drown her she should kick as hard as she can to survive. Hmmph... The other parents were told about this. Nothing changed. How am I to prevent it in the future? If the girl would not have let go and my child died, is that appropriate? She just wasn't fit to survive?

Teaching my child to grow elephant skin so she won't hurt anymore really isn't what life should be about. Granted, we can't make people be nice but there can be incentives to encourage that behavior (hence the reason the punishment is greater for driving intoxicated than it is for littering a piece of chewed gum).

Wow. I can let a lot of posts go but this one hit me. Hopefully I'm reading it all wrong. Please let me know.

did you child apologise on her own volition? or was it coerced from her by some clueless adult???

no way in hell would i have supported an apologise to this bully who tried to drown my child.

Blockhead

#1. Staring at a kid is not a crime, just because you use the term evil eyes pericing her soul, does not matter... Just because someone does something that annoyies you, does not give you permission to cast them out as evil or to tell the authorities. Its an inconveneince.
#2. If the school chose not to do anything (which was the correct decision) then you as a parent should have taken it upon your self talk to the other childs parents. I am not saying that is the end all be all of solutions, but if your child is unable to diffuse the situation, then you need to, even if that means being a "bully" your self.
Bullying will always happens because kids don't know how to act towards different things...
And please don't be the one blaming suicide on Bullying.

TriumphantAngel

HeidiJam wrote:

haffajappa wrote:

HeidiJam wrote:

When are we going to get out of this "everybody is a victim" area? Bullying has been going on since forever.
Is it a "hate" crime if a boy picks on a girl or vice versa??? Quit labeling things...

Who said everyone is a victim?
Victims of bullying are victims... I don't see how anyone can disagree.

So if your kids come home with black eyes or broken bones from a bully, I'm assuming you'd be okay with that.

that's messed up...

Dude, you are a clown...
if you knew anything about parenting or being a parent, you wouldn't make such a stupid comment.
If you are involved in your child's life, you will not have children coming home with black eyes or broken bones out of nowhere. Bullying is a progressive thing, and if you had a clue on being a parent you would/should know when and how to prevent further bullying. Its alot apart our evolutions as children, call it survival of the fittest aif you will. We all have probably experienced bullying in some stage, it happens to all of us.. Its acutally a good character builder and offers the first stages where you stand up for your self or beliefs. THere are extremes in all cases, but bullying is almost unavoidable. Its a part of childhood development. People need to quit making it a bigger issue than it is. Bullying would also be ineffective if parents were move involved in the daily lives of their children, its not hard to tell when something is wrong with your kid...
Quit being such a pusscake.

the Father of the year award goes to..

not you.

considering 8% of all kids who are bullied try to commit suicide, i'd say it is a big issue.

good charachter builder you say? try telling that to the dead kids.

Blockhead

catefrances wrote:

i have never experienced bullying in my life. my character was built quite solid without it. and for you to say that bullying is a good character builder is just insane. to my mind you are saying children who are bullied... who 'allow' themselves to be bullied are weak and have no character(whatever the hell that means). and that is just not the case.

bullying is never okay, be in in the playground or the office and it should never be seen as just a part of growing up. this just keeps the cycle going.

I never said you HAVE to experience bullying to build character, But it is fairly common.
I never said bullying is Okay, I said it is inevitable, it will always happen because kids aren't mature about differences and catagorize themselves.
If you are an adult and you allow your self to be bullied then yes your are weak...