Should I ask Agnes out on a date?

Spiritual_Chaos said:

Meltdown99 said:

Spiritual_Chaos said:

My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".

Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  

Cool and cool.... I feel pressure to turn gay.

Are you serious?

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Forgot to add,
When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 

Words of wisdom.

Never let bullshit societal norms or the desires of others force you into something you don't truly want for yourself.

Won't happen.
What is starting to get to me is people questioning my unemployed status. Is it a societal norm to work? 

Uh, well no, I wouldn't say that. I mean, yeah, people normally work which makes it normal in society. But people have to work to support themselves, feed themselves, clothe themselves, etc. But FYI, being a full time student is considered a job. It is very very normal for a full time student not to work. That's why student loans are so high, lol. So just tell people that when they ask about your unemployment status. If you stop being a full time student and still don't have a job, then you'll just be someone who doesn't support himself.

People are like 'well I went through university and held a part time job bla bla"
Psychology is so competitive that you need a very high GPA to get accepted into postgraduate degrees.
If that wasn't the case I'd work part time and study full time. I need to dedicate 100% of my time to my current degree to have a chance at postgraduate.

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Forgot to add,
When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 

Words of wisdom.

Never let bullshit societal norms or the desires of others force you into something you don't truly want for yourself.

Won't happen.
What is starting to get to me is people questioning my unemployed status. Is it a societal norm to work? 

Uh, well no, I wouldn't say that. I mean, yeah, people normally work which makes it normal in society. But people have to work to support themselves, feed themselves, clothe themselves, etc. But FYI, being a full time student is considered a job. It is very very normal for a full time student not to work. That's why student loans are so high, lol. So just tell people that when they ask about your unemployment status. If you stop being a full time student and still don't have a job, then you'll just be someone who doesn't support himself.

People are like 'well I went through university and held a part time job bla bla"
Psychology is so competitive that you need a very high GPA to get accepted into postgraduate degrees.
If that wasn't the case I'd work part time and study full time. I need to dedicate 100% of my time to my current degree to have a chance at postgraduate.

Ya, well some people are jerks, lol. I actually worked part time all through full time university myself, but man, it sure would have been nice to not have, lol. I chose to move out from my parents' house early so had to work to support myself without screwing myself with too many loans... but that is just one of the legit options. Dude, stop caring so much about what other people think about your choices. I feel like you haven't had the greatest epiphany of adulthood: who cares what other people think???? Fuck 'em!!

I feel great shame when people ask me what I do with myself and I say I'm a full time student rather than giving an occupation.
I don't even know what I want to do after university. I feel like a lost soul in this world.
Thought I wanted to be a clinical psychologist when I went back to uni, now I am not sure it's for me. Plus I have my own shit that is unresolved. Not exactly the ideal practitioner. Not sure if academia/research is my thing either. I was thinking maybe social work but my fucking passion is art (even though I have been lost for painting ideas the past 3 weeks and have done nothing).

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Forgot to add,
When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 

Words of wisdom.

Never let bullshit societal norms or the desires of others force you into something you don't truly want for yourself.

Won't happen.
What is starting to get to me is people questioning my unemployed status. Is it a societal norm to work? 

Uh, well no, I wouldn't say that. I mean, yeah, people normally work which makes it normal in society. But people have to work to support themselves, feed themselves, clothe themselves, etc. But FYI, being a full time student is considered a job. It is very very normal for a full time student not to work. That's why student loans are so high, lol. So just tell people that when they ask about your unemployment status. If you stop being a full time student and still don't have a job, then you'll just be someone who doesn't support himself.

People are like 'well I went through university and held a part time job bla bla"
Psychology is so competitive that you need a very high GPA to get accepted into postgraduate degrees.
If that wasn't the case I'd work part time and study full time. I need to dedicate 100% of my time to my current degree to have a chance at postgraduate.

Ya, well some people are jerks, lol. I actually worked part time all through full time university myself, but man, it sure would have been nice to not have, lol. I chose to move out from my parents' house early so had to work to support myself without screwing myself with too many loans... but that is just one of the legit options. Dude, stop caring so much about what other people think about your choices. I feel like you haven't had the greatest epiphany of adulthood: who cares what other people think???? Fuck 'em!!

Had to work to support your partying ways...lol

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

PJ_Soul said:

oftenreading said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Forgot to add,
When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 

Words of wisdom.

Never let bullshit societal norms or the desires of others force you into something you don't truly want for yourself.

Won't happen.
What is starting to get to me is people questioning my unemployed status. Is it a societal norm to work? 

Uh, well no, I wouldn't say that. I mean, yeah, people normally work which makes it normal in society. But people have to work to support themselves, feed themselves, clothe themselves, etc. But FYI, being a full time student is considered a job. It is very very normal for a full time student not to work. That's why student loans are so high, lol. So just tell people that when they ask about your unemployment status. If you stop being a full time student and still don't have a job, then you'll just be someone who doesn't support himself.

People are like 'well I went through university and held a part time job bla bla"
Psychology is so competitive that you need a very high GPA to get accepted into postgraduate degrees.
If that wasn't the case I'd work part time and study full time. I need to dedicate 100% of my time to my current degree to have a chance at postgraduate.

Ya, well some people are jerks, lol. I actually worked part time all through full time university myself, but man, it sure would have been nice to not have, lol. I chose to move out from my parents' house early so had to work to support myself without screwing myself with too many loans... but that is just one of the legit options. Dude, stop caring so much about what other people think about your choices. I feel like you haven't had the greatest epiphany of adulthood: who cares what other people think???? Fuck 'em!!

I feel great shame when people ask me what I do with myself and I say I'm a full time student rather than giving an occupation.
I don't even know what I want to do after university. I feel like a lost soul in this world.
Thought I wanted to be a clinical psychologist when I went back to uni, now I am not sure it's for me. Plus I have my own shit that is unresolved. Not exactly the ideal practitioner. Not sure if academia/research is my thing either. I was thinking maybe social work but my fucking passion is art (even though I have been lost for painting ideas the past 3 weeks and have done nothing).

everyone is fucked up to a degree. psychologists are no different. I once read a psychologist say that they can be some of the MOST fucked up people! LOL

I'm 44. have a decent job, but it's not my passion. I just kind of lucked into it through working at the same place since I was 23 when I started in security.

when i was younger I always thought I was going to be a cop. Then in high school I thought I'd be a good accountant.

You know what I really want to be when I grow up? HAPPY. that's what. 

I like the people I work with, my job isn't stressful, the benefits/pension are out of this world, it puts food on the table and my girls in dance and me at concerts and my wife out for dinner and drinks with friends. I've come to appreciate this. People may think I have "settled" and I'm wasting my potential. I say "fuck you" to anyone that thinks they know what I want/need. it took me a long time to realize I need to stop giving a shit what people think. satisfying others will NEVER make you happy. it doesn't matter if it's a spouse, a friend, a peer, a parent. 

a guy I'm friends with once said to me "why don't you go back to school so you can make more money? don't you want your kids to want for nothing?". why, so they can see their dad miserable and non-engaging because he's too stressed out/busy with work like my dad was? yeah, no thanks. I'd rather play board games with my kids. 

what opened my eyes? a guy i went to high school with, I saw years later through work. He was an accountant. i asked him how he liked it. He said "I fucking hate it. I only do it because that's what my parents wanted me to do". 

I often see people I used to work with. They look at me with shock (and seeming disdain) when I tell them I still work there. Then I get the "lifer, eh?" comments, like it's something to be embarassed about. you know how I respond? "yep. why would I leave? it's a great place to work". if you respond to people like that with unapologetic, positive confidence, it shuts them down/up immediately. you simply cannot make fun of someone's happiness. 

if you are confident in the choices you've made for yourself then project that. 

I was thinking about the cycle of parents sacrificing for their kids.  If that was the goal then only kids have fun and adults keep on sacrificing.  

Hugh - people are obsessed with work defining their lives.  You let your personal life define you and that is about as much as you can ask for or want.   

Any time I see an adult with a Mohawk or dressing differently than the societal norm I tell other adults who laugh at them that I am jealous of those people who as adults can just wear what they want without fear of a business partner or customer seeing them out in Public with “gasp” a Nine Inch Nails shirt.

HughFreakingDillon said:

bootlegger10 said:

I was thinking about the cycle of parents sacrificing for their kids.  If that was the goal then only kids have fun and adults keep on sacrificing.  

Hugh - people are obsessed with work defining their lives.  You let your personal life define you and that is about as much as you can ask for or want.   

Any time I see an adult with a Mohawk or dressing differently than the societal norm I tell other adults who laugh at them that I am jealous of those people who as adults can just wear what they want without fear of a business partner or customer seeing them out in Public with “gasp” a Nine Inch Nails shirt.

yeah, this is exactly where I'm at. my kids have enough (they honestly have too much). the only thing we might want is a bigger house, but not too much bigger, but that will come soon enough anyway. if I wanted to bust my ass for 8 years of schooling just so my kids could go to mexico every winter, I'd see that as a total waste. my dad busted his ass his whole working life and we never went anywhere. And I couldn't give a shit. I have gone places as an adult. My kids are fortunate as hell that they got to go to Mexico once and swim with fucking turtles in an underground reservoir. And spend 4 nights on a houseboat in the Canadian rockies. so we're obviously not doing too bad. 

I'm low enough on the ladder that there is literally no expectation of any kind of professionalism outside of work. Everyone knows me as the "rock star" who frequents heavy rock concerts and enjoys whiskey and weed. And I honestly don't give AF who knows, from the mail room to the president, as I have zero interest in "moving up" in the corporation. 

some of my best friends are very professionally driven, and that's great for them. whatever works for you, do it. 

The houseboat in the Rockies is that like a rental company.  That would be sweet.  Love the Rockies.  Growing all our family could afford vacation wise was a couple weeks camping up in Northern Ontario...loved it.

Are there ridiculously  cheery pearl jam fans?

lastexitlondon said:

Are there ridiculously  cheery pearl jam fans?

That was my exact same thought.