Should I ask Agnes out on a date?

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  • dankinddankind I am not your foot. Posts: 20,827
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • OffSheGoes35OffSheGoes35 Posts: 3,487
    edited December 2018
    No
    Yeah, I think we can pretty much end the thread here, because it doesn't get any better than this. Nick Drake and Meat Loaf, who knew that would be an unbeatable combination??? :lol:
    Post edited by OffSheGoes35 on
  • No
    I actually do have one more nomination...Thoughts_Arrive and jnimhaoileoin.
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    My mum assumes, as do others, that I am closeted gay because of my situation.
    You should bring home a friend they've never met and introduce him as your boyfriend...might as well have a little fun with their fears...
    I've always thought of doing that. But my mum tends to keep believing me after I've said I was joking.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    My mum assumes, as do others, that I am closeted gay because of my situation.
    You should bring home a friend they've never met and introduce him as your boyfriend...might as well have a little fun with their fears...
    Who said anything about fears?
    I thought I had. They're both very homophobic. 
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    PJ_Soul said:

    For the single people...Do any of you plan on staying single by choice?  My Dad had 2 cousins who choose to be single.  One did eventually marry, in his 70's, he died about 2 years later...  
    I crave love. But then I feel like I don't want a relationship. I'd like companionship but not the arguments, having to fit in with her family and social group who I may not like etc.
    Have you tried sped dating?  Many places arrange speed dating for free, check out the community news.  No idea how you avoid conflict/argument, it's part of life ... it's more important how you handle conflict, unfortunately, most people have never been taught good conflict resolution skills.  Your last sentence is normal fears.  Just be yourself.  You do not want someone who can not except you, as you.  
    I've considered it as I refuse to try online dating. Not just the acceptance of me as me but the having to put up with people I don't like.
    Plus seeing how my two sisters' marriages have turned to shit has left me feeling less than optimistic about marriages.
    As well as what I learned at university, passion fades over time, we habituate to our partner and that is why people break up or cheat.

    That why I suggested speed dating.  Do like playing cards/board games ... some community centres host things like this.    Have you tried meetup.com?  Sadly, lots and lots of marriage's turn to shit these days.  And lots and lots of marriages are going to turn to shit.  It is true, with some the passion fades.  Some it's a mid-life crisis that ends the marriage, affairs, spouse wants a different life...whatever it is.  My Mom who was married to my Dad for over 50 years until she passed, always said people need to learn forgiveness to have successful marriages.
    I thought about speed dating and it's probably the only way I'll try to find love.
    Haven't tried meetup.com, a psychologist I used to see kept suggesting it to me as a way to make friends. I didn't know meetup.com is for dating? I don't know how to play card games lol, never been into them. Board games I never play.

    Meetup.com is probably your best option specifically because it's not actually for dating, per se. But lots of people use it just to get out there and do stuff with other people, hoping that maybe they'll more naturally form a connection with people they end up meeting. It's apparently very effective, and FAR less pressure that actual dating apps and whatnot. And if you don't meet someone to date, you still go out and enjoy other people's company, maybe make some new friends. Win-win. I've suggested you try this at least a couple times before. You came up with lame reasons why you didn't want to try, as usual.
    I just don't feel comfortable meeting new people. It makes me feel like more of a loser to 'want to make new friends'. Been let down by so many people I find it hard to put my trust in people. Sorry for not wanting to try. If my psychologist couldn't get me to do it noone can.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    PJ_Soul said:
    Forgot to add,
    When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

    Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 
    Words of wisdom.
    Never let bullshit societal norms or the desires of others force you into something you don't truly want for yourself.
    Won't happen.
    What is starting to get to me is people questioning my unemployed status. Is it a societal norm to work? 
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    PJ_Soul said:
    Forgot to add,
    When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

    Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 
    Yep, my folks learned to stop bringing it up years ago. I got hounded all thru my 20s about “When are we getting grandkids?” It took a few hundred times of answering “From me, never.” before they finally got the picture.
    I'm lucky. My parents don't give a shit about this at all. My dad actually thinks not having kids was the best decision I ever made. :lol: I think if he could do it all over, he'd make the same decision (kind of an insult to me and my sister, but whatever, hahaha). My mom doesn't mind either, although maybe she would if my sister didn't have two kids. But even if she hadn't, there is no way my mother would ever think to bug me about doing something I don't want to do just because she would like grandchildren. My mom's good that way! She has always said that all she wants for me is to be happy and content with whatever I choose to do with my life, and she's always afforded me the freedom to do what I want, even when I was a kid. She never tried to force me to do shit I wasn't into or try to steer me in a direction I didn't really want to go. Parental pressures were simply not something I ever experienced.
    You are so lucky and I hope you know it.
    My parents look at me with disappointment and pity for my single status. 
    All their friends do to.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    Pork roll, egg, and cheese on an everything bagel. That's a quality breakfast right there. 

    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    I actually do have one more nomination...Thoughts_Arrive and jnimhaoileoin.
    She's willing to stay single plus I told her something bad which got me suspended haha.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • No
    I actually do have one more nomination...Thoughts_Arrive and jnimhaoileoin.
    She's willing to stay single plus I told her something bad which got me suspended haha.
    Everybody is willing to stay single until you convince them otherwise. How badly did you screw up on a scale of 1-10?
  • Thoughts_ArriveThoughts_Arrive Melbourne, Australia Posts: 15,165
    Yes
    I actually do have one more nomination...Thoughts_Arrive and jnimhaoileoin.
    She's willing to stay single plus I told her something bad which got me suspended haha.
    Everybody is willing to stay single until you convince them otherwise. How badly did you screw up on a scale of 1-10?
    10. Sorry, long distance relationships is a no go for me.
    Adelaide 17/11/2009, Melbourne 20/11/2009, Sydney 22/11/2009, Melbourne (Big Day Out Festival) 24/01/2014
  • No
    Okay then. I tried. 
  • bootlegger10bootlegger10 Posts: 15,490
    Yes
    Okay then. I tried. 
    And tried and tried and tried.
  • No
    Okay then. I tried. 
    And tried and tried and tried.
    And failed and failed and failed.I think I'm going to play the Meat Loaf video again to console myself.
  • Meltdown99Meltdown99 None Of Your Business... Posts: 10,739
    Yes
    My mum assumes, as do others, that I am closeted gay because of my situation.
    You should bring home a friend they've never met and introduce him as your boyfriend...might as well have a little fun with their fears...
    Who said anything about fears?
    I thought I had. They're both very homophobic. 
    Thank you.  I knew what you meant,  
    Give Peas A Chance…
  • AnnafalkAnnafalk Sweden Posts: 4,004
  • MalrothMalroth broken down chevrolet Posts: 2,483
    No
    I actually do have one more nomination...Thoughts_Arrive and jnimhaoileoin.
    She's willing to stay single plus I told her something bad which got me suspended haha.
    Everybody is willing to stay single until you convince them otherwise. How badly did you screw up on a scale of 1-10?
    10. Sorry, long distance relationships is a no go for me.

    10 on this scale is deviant sexual behavior. Do you want to lower that number to a 7 or 8?
    The worst of times..they don't phase me,
    even if I look and act really crazy.
  • No
    Annafalk said:
    Thank you. You're very kind. 


  • PJ_SoulPJ_Soul Vancouver, BC Posts: 49,473
    edited December 2018
    Yes
    PJ_Soul said:
    Forgot to add,
    When my mum mentions my future children I tell her that it won't happen and she gets all sad and scared. 

    Having children just because your mother wants grandchildren is one of the worst reasons to have children. They aren't accessories. 
    Words of wisdom.
    Never let bullshit societal norms or the desires of others force you into something you don't truly want for yourself.
    Won't happen.
    What is starting to get to me is people questioning my unemployed status. Is it a societal norm to work? 
    Uh, well no, I wouldn't say that. I mean, yeah, people normally work which makes it normal in society. But people have to work to support themselves, feed themselves, clothe themselves, etc. But FYI, being a full time student is considered a job. It is very very normal for a full time student not to work. That's why student loans are so high, lol. So just tell people that when they ask about your unemployment status. If you stop being a full time student and still don't have a job, then you'll just be someone who doesn't support himself.
    Post edited by PJ_Soul on
    With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
  • Meltdown99Meltdown99 None Of Your Business... Posts: 10,739
    Yes
    My mum assumes, as do others, that I am closeted gay because of my situation.
    You should bring home a friend they've never met and introduce him as your boyfriend...might as well have a little fun with their fears...
    I've always thought of doing that. But my mum tends to keep believing me after I've said I was joking.
    That might not go so well...
    Give Peas A Chance…
  • dankinddankind I am not your foot. Posts: 20,827
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    "Mostly I think that people react sensitively because they know you’ve got a point"
  • Meltdown99Meltdown99 None Of Your Business... Posts: 10,739
    Yes
    My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  
    Give Peas A Chance…
  • 23scidoo23scidoo Thessaloniki,Greece Posts: 18,414
    My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  
    Swedish..
    Athens 2006. Dusseldorf 2007. Berlin 2009. Venice 2010. Amsterdam 1 2012. Amsterdam 1+2 2014. Buenos Aires 2015.
    Prague Krakow Berlin 2018. Berlin 2022
    EV, Taormina 1+2 2017.

    I wish i was the souvenir you kept your house key on..
  • My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  
    Cool and cool.... I feel pressure to turn gay.
    "Mostly I think that people react sensitively because they know you’ve got a point"
  • dankinddankind I am not your foot. Posts: 20,827
    Yes
    My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  
    Cool and cool.... I feel pressure to turn gay.
    If only it were that simple. Stupid biology.
    I SAW PEARL JAM
  • Meltdown99Meltdown99 None Of Your Business... Posts: 10,739
    Yes
    My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  
    Cool and cool.... I feel pressure to turn gay.
    That's your choice.  Discuss this with Agnus.  
    Give Peas A Chance…
  • No
    23scidoo said:
    My mom thinks it's weird that no one out of her 4 chilren is gay. I even noticed during our teens that she very deliberately talked about homosexuality in a way to make us feel "it was a-okey".
    Sounds like you have a really cool mother with a very open mind.  Unfortunately, not all people have Mother's like that.  
    Swedish..
    What are Greek mothers like?
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