The Idiot Thread

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  • Drowned Out
    Drowned Out Posts: 6,056
    haha.....that is pretty much the same story, too funny.
    Ya, I can't even imagine the shit I'd have been in if everyone had a video camera in their pocket.
    Nothing scares me more about being a parent than remembering stories like the one above. Hopefully my kids are not as idiotic as I was. I can think of two other times I nearly died of exposure in my teens due to being a drunken idiot.
    Come to think of it....in both situations, a phone would have prevented the crisis, so maybe they're not all bad.
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    callen said:

    Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

    I sky dived once. I think back on it and without question... I was an idiot.

    Just as I was about to jump, I resigned myself to death. I literally thought to myself, "You fukin idiot. What are you doing? If I die... I deserve it. This is stupid."

    Those days, they pulled the chute for you as you jumped from the plane. Thank God because I'm not sure I would have been able to gather my wits and pull it myself.

    Being on the ground was a great feeling.

    Thirty you conquered fear. Most don't have the fortitude.
    That's one way of looking at it I guess. Thanks.

    The funniest thing about the whole experience was when I kept questioning why the radios were one way radios (base to sky). I was saying, "This makes no sense. I could look up at a chute malfunction and tell you what I see: a streamer, a tangle, whatever!"

    The slides of the potential problems were awful looking knowing you were going to be leaping from a plane and hoping for a well-packed chute.

    After I jumped, I immediately knew why the radios were one way: first time jumpers are not capable of saying anything intelligible at all as they plummet towards Earth.

    An idiot I tell you. An idiot.
    "My brain's a good brain!"
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    paulonious said:

    Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

    I just remembered a time in my youth:

    My father, uncle and friends took my cousin and I on an overnight snowmobiling and ice fishing trip when we were about 8 years old.

    The men left us at the cabin during the days to go do serious sledding while my cousin and I amused ourselves at camp. We climbed up on the roof and began to jump off the roof into the abundant snowfall at the base of the cabin- making our way around always jumping into the deep, fresh snow. Of course, as luck would have it... on my 6th or 7th jump, I landed squarely on a picnic table with about 3 inches of snow. I slammed my head on my knees and cried for a while- it could have been worse.

    That Russian dude is lucky there wasn't anything buried beneath the snow. Landing on a stake or something else wouldn't have felt that good.

    and nowadays such a thing would be a crime!

    Sad but true.

    My cousin and I had quite a bit of independence and freedom at very early ages. We got into all kinds of trouble with such- nothing bad... just good, innocent stuff.

    The same trip, with the adults off drinking whisky and sledding, Trevor and I made a course through the trees at the other side of the lake. Then we tried to scare each other having them ride as the passenger. He scared me pretty good. Then I went nuts trying to scare him.

    I flew out of the track at one point and was blitzing down the hill through a heavily wooded area. Of course, we nailed a tree dead on. Both of us went flying. We got up and Trevor was pissed with me. We had a huge problem.

    The skis were on either side of the tree and the hill was too steep to pull the skidoo away from the tree to free it. We had to hike back to Trevor's sled at the cabin, grab an axe, and chop the tree down. No shit.

    As prepubescent kids, we were literally down to our longjohns and sweating like bastards after the long hike and tree chopping task. But we rejoiced the moment we knocked the tree over and liberated the sled- hopping back on our skidoos and racing back to the cabin like idiots.

    Good, solid, confidence building experiences.
    "My brain's a good brain!"
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    Drowned Out said:

    lol....reminds me of NYE 1992.....trippin balls....thought it would be a good idea to watch the fireworks downtown from the roof of my friends house, during a big house party. We climbed out a window and up on to the roof of his two storey. Of course, being Edmonton, it was -30C and we were cool 18 year olds = all in tshirts....so after the fireworks, we were in a hurry to get back inside. Hard to describe the roof layout, but there was only a small path to descend back to the edge where the window was....the guy behind me put his hands on my back...didn't really push me, but just that distraction was enough to make me lose my footing on the snow/ice. Trying to grab shingles, then the gutter, as I slid down the roof with a beer in each hand didn't work so well. Fell from the second storey, through a tree, past the picture window in the dining room (must've looked hilarious from inside), missed the fence by a foot or two, and landed in a snow bank flat on my back. I was scared to move for a few seconds (and was recovering from the visuals ha)....finally realized I was ok, and stood up to a big crowd out on the deck. Held up both hands and yelled 'I didn't even spill my beer!' and everyone cheered. Like a scene out of a bad frat movie. Idiot.

    Classic.
    "My brain's a good brain!"
  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Oh, you boys! Your reminiscing is endearing, and brings to mind some of the shit my husband did in his teen years with friends.

    Among them, calling the police on themselves after doing well more than one hit of acid.
  • brianlux
    brianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 43,662
    hedonist said:

    Oh, you boys! Your reminiscing is endearing, and brings to mind some of the shit my husband did in his teen years with friends.

    Among them, calling the police on themselves after doing well more than one hit of acid.

    It is fun indeed to read this craziness, LOL! I'll bet you ladies have done some crazy stuff too... or is it really just a "guy thing"? haha!

    "It's a sad and beautiful world"
    -Roberto Benigni

  • brianlux
    brianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 43,662
    hedonist said:

    Oh, you boys! Your reminiscing is endearing, and brings to mind some of the shit my husband did in his teen years with friends.

    Among them, calling the police on themselves after doing well more than one hit of acid.

    Hedo, your story reminds me of the time waaaay back when I was 18 and living in a dorm room for a year. I had just met some new friends and we were smoking a few refers and one one my new friends came in and told me I was in big trouble.

    "Why!?" I asked.

    "Because I overheard your roommate [who was from Iran] talking to some of his Iranian buddies about how he was going to have you extradited to Iran for possession of marijuana," he said bluntly.

    "THEY CAN DO THAT???"

    I was starting to freak out.

    "Oh hell, yeah. And once they lock you up, man, that's it. You're gone."

    By now I'm totally starting to freaking out big time- almost in tears. But suddenly the other guys start cracking up and rolling around on the floor. Oh man, talk about gullible! hahah!



    "It's a sad and beautiful world"
    -Roberto Benigni

  • hedonist
    hedonist Posts: 24,524
    Ha! I can just see young D-Lux wigging out.

    Speaking of Iran and pot, the summer we spent in Tehran right before the revolution was my sister's introduction to Persian weed via our cousin. She told me it was AMAZING.
  • brianlux
    brianlux Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 43,662
    hedonist said:

    Ha! I can just see young D-Lux wigging out.

    Speaking of Iran and pot, the summer we spent in Tehran right before the revolution was my sister's introduction to Persian weed via our cousin. She told me it was AMAZING.

    Ooh! Sounds very exotic! :smiley:

    "It's a sad and beautiful world"
    -Roberto Benigni

  • rr165892
    rr165892 Posts: 5,697
    http://www.newstalkflorida.com/tampa-couple-discovered-garbage-truck-rough-night-casino/
    Classic idiots.
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    rr165892 said:

    http://www.newstalkflorida.com/tampa-couple-discovered-garbage-truck-rough-night-casino/
    Classic idiots.

    Sounds like Drowned Out and Jason at PJ20!

    You gotta love the 'classic' idiot. Harmless- except to themselves- they can sure make you feel intelligent.
    "My brain's a good brain!"
  • Jason P
    Jason P Posts: 19,305
    Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

    rr165892 said:

    http://www.newstalkflorida.com/tampa-couple-discovered-garbage-truck-rough-night-casino/
    Classic idiots.

    Sounds like Drowned Out and Jason at PJ20!

    You gotta love the 'classic' idiot. Harmless- except to themselves- they can sure make you feel intelligent.
    Speaking of PJ20, what about the idiot who almost burned down the pavilion with a Chinese lantern on day two during the TOTD reunion??? You had to be in the lawn to see it, but for about two minutes I was scared that the old wooden roof was gonna catch fire and start a stampede cause some moron couldn't get a chinese lantern to properly take flight. I think someone got burned in the crowd when it finally came down.

    Worst Chinese lantern ever ...
    Be Excellent To Each Other
    Party On, Dudes!
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    Jason P said:

    Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

    rr165892 said:

    http://www.newstalkflorida.com/tampa-couple-discovered-garbage-truck-rough-night-casino/
    Classic idiots.

    Sounds like Drowned Out and Jason at PJ20!

    You gotta love the 'classic' idiot. Harmless- except to themselves- they can sure make you feel intelligent.
    Speaking of PJ20, what about the idiot who almost burned down the pavilion with a Chinese lantern on day two during the TOTD reunion??? You had to be in the lawn to see it, but for about two minutes I was scared that the old wooden roof was gonna catch fire and start a stampede cause some moron couldn't get a chinese lantern to properly take flight. I think someone got burned in the crowd when it finally came down.

    Worst Chinese lantern ever ...
    I wasn't there, but I remember people speaking of this event.

    It would be nice to see people's thought bubbles: "This is gonna be waaay cool! Yup. Look at that. I'm so proud of myself right now. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. No. No. Please no."
    "My brain's a good brain!"
  • HughFreakingDillon
    HughFreakingDillon Winnipeg Posts: 39,473
    Drowned Out said:

    lol....reminds me of NYE 1992.....trippin balls....thought it would be a good idea to watch the fireworks downtown from the roof of my friends house, during a big house party. We climbed out a window and up on to the roof of his two storey. Of course, being Edmonton, it was -30C and we were cool 18 year olds = all in tshirts....so after the fireworks, we were in a hurry to get back inside. Hard to describe the roof layout, but there was only a small path to descend back to the edge where the window was....the guy behind me put his hands on my back...didn't really push me, but just that distraction was enough to make me lose my footing on the snow/ice. Trying to grab shingles, then the gutter, as I slid down the roof with a beer in each hand didn't work so well. Fell from the second storey, through a tree, past the picture window in the dining room (must've looked hilarious from inside), missed the fence by a foot or two, and landed in a snow bank flat on my back. I was scared to move for a few seconds (and was recovering from the visuals ha)....finally realized I was ok, and stood up to a big crowd out on the deck. Held up both hands and yelled 'I didn't even spill my beer!' and everyone cheered. Like a scene out of a bad frat movie. Idiot.

    like a scene out of Old School or Almost Famous or Dazed and Confused.

    most excellent, sir. most excellent. you just won the internet today.

    By The Time They Figure Out What Went Wrong, We'll Be Sitting On A Beach, Earning Twenty Percent.




  • rr165892
    rr165892 Posts: 5,697
    Picking the low hangin fruit this morning.
    http://newsfeed.gawker.com/idiot-walmart-customer-headbutts-trash-talking-employee-1685175142?utm_campaign=socialflow_gawker_twitter&utm_source=gawker_twitter&utm_medium=socialflow
  • rr165892
    rr165892 Posts: 5,697
    http://www.cbs12.com/news/top-stories/stories/vid_23343.shtml

    So this tool bag lawmaker wants to make Yoga Pants illegal.That would really diminish my happiness at spin class.
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    rr165892 said:

    http://www.cbs12.com/news/top-stories/stories/vid_23343.shtml

    So this tool bag lawmaker wants to make Yoga Pants illegal.That would really diminish my happiness at spin class.

    I have to admit, yoga pants are a rather awesome clothing innovation.

    Of all things to fight. Geez man... you want this to be your legacy?
    "My brain's a good brain!"
  • DarthMaeglin
    DarthMaeglin Toronto Posts: 2,994
    You guys have reminded me of one of my own moments of idiocy, lol. It was the summer of 2000 or 2001, I think, and my cousin and I went up to our cottage for the weekend (I do remember the New Jersey Devils won the Stanley Cup, we listened to it on the radio, lol). On Saturday, after a beer breakfast, we decided it would be a good idea to smoke a joint, munch some shrooms and hop in the canoe for a bit of a trip up the lake.
    Sure enough, 45 minutes or so in (shortly after sitting in the canoe and holding onto a sheer rock face and drinking another beer and having another smoke), while our arms were getting a work out of sorts, all of a sudden our legs needed to be in motion as well. We pulled the canoe up the shore and tore off up the hill (the west side of the lake is a pretty steep climb of 100-150 feet, heavily wooded). We made it to the top and found a beautiful, picturesque spot complete with a pond that had several beaver lodges in it.
    After admiring the view for a bit, we started back down the slope, but realized that we hadn't thought to mark a trail back to the canoe. As we were going down we figured we'd come up the slope on a bit of an angle and so worked our way in the direction we thought we should.
    At one point of the descent, we came across a sheer rock face that was about 15 feet across, and only 30 feet or so high. Having somewhat impaired judgement, I began working my way along it, literally gripping with my fingertips. My cousin decided he'd just go up and around and meet me on the other side. I did beat him across, but looking back at it I realized just how dumb I'd been. If I'd lost my grip I definitely would've gone crashing into the trees with some degree of harm sure to occur.
    Sure enough, we did make it to the shore, with no canoe in sight. Somehow we were smart enough to realize we should each head in opposite directions along the shore, and soon enough my cousin was calling out that he'd found our ride. I quickly scrambled over to where he was and after a quick beer we hopped in and started paddling for home. We got back just as the sun was setting behind the western slope (we hadn't brought a flashlight or anything of the sort, I can recall we were a bit nervous about not being visible on the water for other boats if we lost the daylight). And right back to the drinking and smoking, can't remember if that was the night of the Devils' Cup win (we both cheer for the Devils over our local team, lol).
    I did go back later and found the rock face I went across and confirmed that I truly had been an idiot to make the attempt, fortunately a lucky one in that instance (remembered not to lose the boat that time as well, lol).
    "The world is full of idiots and I am but one of them."

    10-30-1991 Toronto, Toronto 1 & 2 2016, Toronto 2022
  • Jason P
    Jason P Posts: 19,305
    Yoda has pants not, you idiots. Hmmmmmm.
    Be Excellent To Each Other
    Party On, Dudes!
  • Thirty Bills Unpaid
    Thirty Bills Unpaid Posts: 16,881
    Bill Walton thinks Michael Jordan was an average athlete:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/02/12/bill-walton-michael-jordan_n_6672370.html

    Go wear yoga pants ya idiot. Climb a rock face high on shrooms while you are at it!
    "My brain's a good brain!"

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