Ladies, would you do this to a guy?

eyedclaar wrote:

norm wrote:

marry your pillow

He could always just have dirty sex with the pillow and dump it the next day. That should get his self-esteem back on track.

it's worked for me in the past

LikeAnOcean wrote:

Go on 7 or 8 dates with him, really good dates, the last date make plans yourself for future dates, borrow his movies, but then barely communicate with him for over a month now?

Granted she took a two week vacation on the other side of the world and her job has been working her crazy hours, but a simple text, "hey, hows it going" or a response to a "hey, how's it going" text would suffice.. She texted me once since when she got back over two weeks ago saying she wanted to go as soon as work wasn't working her crazy. That's our communication for the month. :?

Does this mean I'm shit out of luck? Time to move to the next fish?

Sometimes I just don't understand human behavior.

Maybe she's ill? Suffers from depression? Just heard someone in her family is ill?

And just playing devil's advocate - you say 'really good dates'. Are you sure that's her impression too, or because they seemed good to you, you are assuming they were good to her too?

Why not call her?

redrock wrote:

Have YOU been in touch with her and is she just ignoring your texts/calls?

This is what I was wondering. I know you wanted to give her space while she was on vacation...but could be that she's wondering where you disappeared to as well. If you're interested then contact her. If she ignores you, move on. Generally speaking if a guy gives me space, I give it to him right back. +

pandora wrote:

She might be afraid of her feelings for you. That is best case scenario or perhaps she met someone else or an old flame reappeared.
Can you take a lesson from the old fashioned guys and send flowers with the invitation to do something you know she likes? A friendly nudge. This texting crap is terribly unromantic as are answering machines. Best put your friendly but not overpowering words on paper.

Yeah texting is lame...texting is for quick convos...call her...if she's still interested she'll take the call...don't get strung along

LikeAnOcean wrote:

comebackgirl wrote:

redrock wrote:

Have YOU been in touch with her and is she just ignoring your texts/calls?

This is what I was wondering. I know you wanted to give her space while she was on vacation...but could be that she's wondering where you disappeared to as well. If you're interested then contact her. If she ignores you, move on. Generally speaking if a guy gives me space, I give it to him right back. +

I've invited her out twice since she got back from vacation.. her last response was that she was working like crazy, but would let me know when she's free.

does she stay in touch (texts, calls, etc) - or do you only talk when you see her? I wouldn't pressure her to hang out - if she's busy, she's busy and there's nothing more annoying than someone not understanding that when you're already overwhelmed. BUT she could still probably find the time to keep in touch. I wouldn't close yourself off to other girls in the meantime.

LikeAnOcean wrote:

norm wrote:

pandora wrote:

She might be afraid of her feelings for you. That is best case scenario or perhaps she met someone else or an old flame reappeared.
Can you take a lesson from the old fashioned guys and send flowers with the invitation to do something you know she likes? A friendly nudge. This texting crap is terribly unromantic as are answering machines. Best put your friendly but not overpowering words on paper.

Yeah texting is lame...texting is for quick convos...call her...if she's still interested she'll take the call...don't get strung along

We both agreed texting is the best form of communication early on. She hates talking on the phone, even to her friends. She works weird hours too so you never know if she's asleep or not.

There's nothing wrong with texting.. I'm sure when they invented the phone people said the same thing about phone conversations. In person is the best way to socialize.

What can I say, I'm old

But at this point a Cal is in order it you want to continue seeing her...just check in with is all

norm wrote:

Yeah texting is lame...texting is for quick convos...call her...if she's still interested she'll take the call...don't get strung along

+1

Maybe her "two week vacation" was actually a boob-job, nose-job, liposuction trip and she doesn't want you to see her until the scars heal... Did you give her the impression you wanted her to change her personal appearance completely before seeing her again? I bet you did... Even if it was sub-conscious... Maybe you ordered two gigantic glasses of milk at dinner, stopped her from sniffing the wine in her glass, and trimmed all the fat off your steak before eating it? Good job. How could she not feel self conscious? (READ: She's f••king crazy.)

Or you might be overreacting and it's a test to see how well you deal with independence after a couple nice dates with a girl. (READ: She's still f••king crazy) Keep looking after yourself. Go out with your other friends, make sure you don't get stuck in a shame spiral, go on a bender or miss working out. Give it 2 weeks. Don't let it bother you, you might find it doesn't bother you as much as it does now, and if you still want to see her, ask her to join you and your friends for a group event. No pressure.

OR she's just not that into you, and you should be polite, but upfront and tell her it's not fair to string you along when its clear there's no way she's ever going to ask you out again, and make arrangements to get whatever it is she might still have of yours. If she fesses up and says you can stop by her place to pick it up, make sure you're naked when she answers the door. Or at least shirt-cock her. (READ: she's f••king crazy if she doesn't bone you right then and there.) The rest of my advice seemed appropriate…

Poncier wrote:

norm wrote:

But at this point a Cal is in order it you want to continue seeing her...just check in with is all

But which Cal??

this one