it's funny watching worlds collide on facebook...old flames especially. i agree it can get a bit weird, but again if you parted as friends and have connected since, then facebook can be a cool way to reconnect. but if things were left ugly, then it's a stalker scene.
I closed my facebook account because one of my ex girls was being really creepy and writing weird comments of my photos and reading into everything. She would friend girls I was friends with just to check out their profiles; like girls I knew for a fact she never met before. So I would get my friends that are girls asking me "hey do you know _____ _____ she just friended me" then I would have to explain.
I also closed it because the one ex that I still have something for, I got tired of seeing pictures of her pop up. I haven't talked to her in a couple years but I always used to look at her profile trying to figure out what she was up to. When she first got on it I wouldn't friend her because I didn't want to see her because it would bother me- she friended me and it just got annoying seeing pictures of her pop up. I would look at her profile to try and figure out where she was living or who she was dating, and it really just brought me down knowing how creepy I was being- so I closed my account and haven't been back on.
So 2 cases of creepiness caused me to close the thing
I closed my facebook account because one of my ex girls was being really creepy and writing weird comments of my photos and reading into everything. She would friend girls I was friends with just to check out their profiles; like girls I knew for a fact she never met before. So I would get my friends that are girls asking me "hey do you know _____ _____ she just friended me" then I would have to explain.
I also closed it because the one ex that I still have something for, I got tired of seeing pictures of her pop up. I haven't talked to her in a couple years but I always used to look at her profile trying to figure out what she was up to. When she first got on it I wouldn't friend her because I didn't want to see her because it would bother me- she friended me and it just got annoying seeing pictures of her pop up. I would look at her profile to try and figure out where she was living or who she was dating, and it really just brought me down knowing how creepy I was being- so I closed my account and haven't been back on.
So 2 cases of creepiness caused me to close the thing
Maybe I ought to consider the same. The ex I still have something for unfriended me because I was being an asshole and couldn't get over her. Even so, every now and again I go into nosey stalker mode and scope out her profile and pictures. She's still with the guy she left me for and seeing pictures of them traveling the world together and totally happy 2-3 years later always fucks with my head. It can't be healthy.
oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
By the way, im not phased by this chick, I am rather amused by it all
Yeah right. I don't buy this idea that she's trying to friend you as well as your husband (why would she do that unless she's just socially regarded). You're green with jealousy and you probably check your husband's email & text messages without his knowledge.
Um, okay :? think what you want but im telling the truth - she is the one that seached and requested the friendship...
Can I just repeat that I had NO WORRIES at all that she asked to be his friend, but when she got shitty and started accusing me of not being able to move on (wtf???) thats when I thought she had issues with it.
I know in alot of cases people are "friends" with ex's whether it be on FB or day to day life - and thats cool as, but for myself and my partner we didnt feel it was neccassary...and the fact that she went all shitty at us afterwards shows me she is the one who cant move on.
AND she has been adding our friends (or trying to) on FB, so we all have mutual friends, but she hasnt seen or spoken to these people in about 15 years and they hardly know her :?
"....and was very surprised to see that he didnt actually have a recipe for anus-ankle soup." - Big Ed
My wife was getting a "do you want to be friends" prompt for my ex gilfriend. I guess since she's in my yahoo contact list and we all went to the same college she's been asked. So have I but I wouldn't dare add her as a friend. That would just be too weird. But my wife was asking me why she would have been requested to be this person's "friend"? Would I have to delete this ex from my yahoo contact list to stop these prompts?
My wife was getting a "do you want to be friends" prompt for my ex gilfriend. I guess since she's in my yahoo contact list and we all went to the same college she's been asked. So have I but I wouldn't dare add her as a friend. That would just be too weird. But my wife was asking me why she would have been requested to be this person's "friend"? Would I have to delete this ex from my yahoo contact list to stop these prompts?
Not sure? Would your wife get upset knowing your ex was on your contact list?
My hubby doesnt feel comfortable with me having male friends on my MSN chat window contacts list, so there's only female friends on there. I used to try and fight it, because I knew I would never do anything...but he still felt weird about it and I had to respect him and delete my male friends....
All good. Everyones different and I think it has alot to do with personal experiences...both my hubby and I have been cheated on in the past, and this chick that is trying to be "friends" with him was the one who cheated.
"....and was very surprised to see that he didnt actually have a recipe for anus-ankle soup." - Big Ed
My wife was getting a "do you want to be friends" prompt for my ex gilfriend. I guess since she's in my yahoo contact list and we all went to the same college she's been asked. So have I but I wouldn't dare add her as a friend. That would just be too weird. But my wife was asking me why she would have been requested to be this person's "friend"? Would I have to delete this ex from my yahoo contact list to stop these prompts?
Not sure? Would your wife get upset knowing your ex was on your contact list?
My hubby doesnt feel comfortable with me having male friends on my MSN chat window contacts list, so there's only female friends on there. I used to try and fight it, because I knew I would never do anything...but he still felt weird about it and I had to respect him and delete my male friends....
All good. Everyones different and I think it has alot to do with personal experiences...both my hubby and I have been cheated on in the past, and this chick that is trying to be "friends" with him was the one who cheated.
:shock: woah, you can't have male friends? :oops: Now I understand why you don't want his ex contacting him. I met TWO of my bf's ex's in a chip shop one night... at the same time. He got quite uncomfortable and embarrassed but I thought it was funny and quite cute. BUT I know I'd certainly find it embarrassing bumping into two of my ex's at the same time when I'm with my boyfriend... even if I'm NOT with him
The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
:shock: woah, you can't have male friends? :oops: Now I understand why you don't want his ex contacting him. I met TWO of my bf's ex's in a chip shop one night... at the same time. He got quite uncomfortable and embarrassed but I thought it was funny and quite cute. BUT I know I'd certainly find it embarrassing bumping into two of my ex's at the same time when I'm with my boyfriend... even if I'm NOT with him
I can have male friends! Just not on MSN chat windows etc....and its more out of respect for him, because I know how uncomfortable it makes him feel Trust me! We've had some MASSIVE fights about this subject, and it was only after I saw how much he was affected by his Mums infedelity, that I kinda took a step back and looked at the situation
I wouldnt feel comfortablw with him in an instant chat message room thingy with girls I hadnt met or didnt know when I wasnt home - so it kinda goes both ways
We are both quite similar like that - but I do have male friends, although, come to think of it - none of my OWN from my life before I met my hubby, prolly coz I dated all my male friends in the past
That wouldve been amusing at that Fish and Chip shop Helen Was your boyf red in the face?
"....and was very surprised to see that he didnt actually have a recipe for anus-ankle soup." - Big Ed
:shock: woah, you can't have male friends? :oops: Now I understand why you don't want his ex contacting him. I met TWO of my bf's ex's in a chip shop one night... at the same time. He got quite uncomfortable and embarrassed but I thought it was funny and quite cute. BUT I know I'd certainly find it embarrassing bumping into two of my ex's at the same time when I'm with my boyfriend... even if I'm NOT with him
I can have male friends! Just not on MSN chat windows etc....and its more out of respect for him, because I know how uncomfortable it makes him feel Trust me! We've had some MASSIVE fights about this subject, and it was only after I saw how much he was affected by his Mums infedelity, that I kinda took a step back and looked at the situation
I wouldnt feel comfortablw with him in an instant chat message room thingy with girls I hadnt met or didnt know when I wasnt home - so it kinda goes both ways
We are both quite similar like that - but I do have male friends, although, come to think of it - none of my OWN from my life before I met my hubby, prolly coz I dated all my male friends in the past
That wouldve been amusing at that Fish and Chip shop Helen Was your boyf red in the face?
well he introduced them to me... cos they came up to him and a minute later he said 'cmon let's go out for a cigarette' so I figured he didn't like them and then he told me, it was pretty funny.
I can certainly see where you're coming from about him talking to girls you don't know on msn. I've had friends who had problems with that before so I know what it's like... he's seen me chatting to guys before and just asks 'who's that?' and I tell him and he gets back to watching tv or whatever... but I've never sensed he has any kinda problem with it. He's plenty of female friends who he often chats to but I've made male friends since I got here and if I'm chatting to them he may chat to us for a minute or may not the only time he took over was when I was kinda in trouble and cornered by some guy who was drunk and getting quite agressive, I was trying to calm him down but then he came over and one of my male friends took me away. So I just left him to deal with it but he's quite a pacifist so was explaining to the guy why this may not be a topic I want to be discussing... but the guy was too drunk.
Anyway, that's kinda verged off topic :oops: and I'm not sure what it has to do with anything
The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
My god! The amount of stalker stories! It makes me tremble with the thought of having a facebook... But I just dig it too much I love social networking sites and find them a great way to interact with people, but the ex factor can be quite a creepy one. Luckily I have only one ex as a friend and he's treated me decently. I like the private features so not just anyone can look at your profile, but then there's the fact that people can read you comments to mutual friends and so forth... It's just best not to think about these things! It can make your mind spin!
So no crazy ex stories from me yet... But crazy psychos have unfortunately stalked me like crazy on my social networking sites. I suppose it comes with the territory :( What is with people?
So no crazy ex stories from me yet... But crazy psychos have unfortunately stalked me like crazy on my social networking sites. I suppose it comes with the territory :( What is with people?
Broken hearts make people kinda crazy. I could write 2 albums saying my ex is a worthless cunt and people would call me a sensitive, tortured artist... I pop onto facebook every now and again to see how a woman I once loved is doing these days and I'm a dangerous psychotic stalker.
I think you're probably reading too much into this. People "friend" mere acquaintances on facebook, it's not like it requires any sort of close personal bond of friendship. I have 200 friends or something on there... I actually speak to maybe a dozen. So she probably thinks you're rejecting her because you're jealous or scared. She'd probably be surprised to hear you take so seriously the commitment of facebook friendship.
Nah, im not reading too much into it, because im not one of those people who have 200 friends on FB, I have maybe 50?
I need to be pretty ontop of my friends list, because my hubby and I have two kids and I like to know that only my good friends can access info about me and the kids etc...plus, ive always been alot more about quality or quantity...
And the whole way she went about it was in poor taste...it was absolutely fine the first time, but then she kept sending my hubby friend requests and we would ignore them and she would keep on trying....then today - she commented on my friends status after I had, when she has NEVER done that in the past, and mad a big hoo haa about how shes expecting another baby and shes so damn happy with her perfect life that she could just pinch herself...and even the mutual friend messaged me and said "Whats the deal? Is she doing this to piss you off?"
I'm a pretty social person but I would have to agree with you, (hell, look at my sig). MySpace is not nearly as invasive as Facebook is, where people can find you via your friends even if you keep your alma mater and other info unlisted.
I friended a few ex'es and my friend's ex'es and she started getting harassed by the wife of the ex that made a comment on her profile. Drama! It's like high school again sometimes on here.
Children being involved... I 100% agree with you. I hate the idea of some freaky strangers having access to my kid/family, so I try to keep it on the downlow as much as possible. I've been thinking about weeding out my FB friends for awhile... thanks for reminding me the good reasons why I should
My god! The amount of stalker stories! It makes me tremble with the thought of having a facebook... But I just dig it too much I love social networking sites and find them a great way to interact with people, but the ex factor can be quite a creepy one. Luckily I have only one ex as a friend and he's treated me decently. I like the private features so not just anyone can look at your profile, but then there's the fact that people can read you comments to mutual friends and so forth... It's just best not to think about these things! It can make your mind spin!
So no crazy ex stories from me yet... But crazy psychos have unfortunately stalked me like crazy on my social networking sites. I suppose it comes with the territory :( What is with people?
Remember the crazy pizza delivery boy stalker from the old Pit? I hope he didn't make it on to this board :evil: :(
I could write 2 albums saying my ex is a worthless cunt and people would call me a sensitive, tortured artist...
What would Buckcherry do?
Probably bust into her bf's place, kick his ass, do lines of coke off his unconscious body, then run a train on each of her best friends while she watched.
But they don't have to worry about passing the character and fitness portion of the bar exam
\
Remember the crazy pizza delivery boy stalker from the old Pit? I hope he didn't make it on to this board :evil: :(
Dude, I hope not. Talk about creeeeeeeeeepy! Imagine if he showed up on your "People you may know" facebook feed. Now THAT would be scary!
Or worse, showing up at your door delivering pizza... Eek! The internet is full of a lot of creepos, but luckily a lot of us have good heads on our shoulders
\
Remember the crazy pizza delivery boy stalker from the old Pit? I hope he didn't make it on to this board :evil: :(
Dude, I hope not. Talk about creeeeeeeeeepy! Imagine if he showed up on your "People you may know" facebook feed. Now THAT would be scary!
Or worse, showing up at your door delivering pizza... Eek! The internet is full of a lot of creepos, but luckily a lot of us have good heads on our shoulders
update me on this pizza man!!??
"....and was very surprised to see that he didnt actually have a recipe for anus-ankle soup." - Big Ed
Funny thread. I recently ran Facebook's email tool, where it imports your mail contacts from gmail, yahoo ect...and I got a wicked surprise. One of my exes, who has an email address I set up for her a few years ago, popped up with a new last name (of the jerk she cheated on me with). The weird thing is though, that it was pretty much what I call a 'stalker profile'... where someone sets up a profile with only basic information and no headshot for the sole purpose of stalking other people. The only thing that stood out was the fact that she had joined MY GEOGRAPHICAL NETWORK, which, as I found out in my settings, would give her unblocked access to my profile. :shock:
Granted she could be stalking one of the other 300,000 people in the Columbus Network. Perhaps it would be best to just block her.
But since we're on the topic of stalking... I found my first girlfriend's profile the other day. We split on good terms and I haven't heard from her in 19 years or so. I'm not looking to rekindle anything, but I really do wonder what she's been doing with her life and how things turned out. The problem is, if I shoot her a message, she'll obviously know that I 'searched' her name at some point, as we have no mutual friends and live in different states. I just worry that I'll give her that creepy-stalker vibe..which wouldn't be good.
Make your life a mission - not an intermission. - Arnold Gasglow
this is a good thread...i don't find anything wrong with catching back up with someone. you can always just send a message with the friend request that says something like you were reminiscent and genuinely wondered what was up. If she doesn't like it then she won't answer if she does then you're fine. I've talked to a bunch of old friends like that on facebook just to find out where people ended up.
\
Remember the crazy pizza delivery boy stalker from the old Pit? I hope he didn't make it on to this board :evil: :(
Dude, I hope not. Talk about creeeeeeeeeepy! Imagine if he showed up on your "People you may know" facebook feed. Now THAT would be scary!
Or worse, showing up at your door delivering pizza... Eek! The internet is full of a lot of creepos, but luckily a lot of us have good heads on our shoulders
\
Remember the crazy pizza delivery boy stalker from the old Pit? I hope he didn't make it on to this board :evil: :(
Dude, I hope not. Talk about creeeeeeeeeepy! Imagine if he showed up on your "People you may know" facebook feed. Now THAT would be scary!
Or worse, showing up at your door delivering pizza... Eek! The internet is full of a lot of creepos, but luckily a lot of us have good heads on our shoulders
update me on this pizza man!!??
Here I am ladies!!!!
Just kidding, I have no idea who this pizza guy is, but he sounds like a CREEP!!! My girlfriend and I met on the net...I was suprised to find out that she was actually a truly good hearted and beautiful person...until we moved in together... did I say that? j/k.
Back on topic....ahem, FUCK FACEBOOK!
7/2/06 - Denver, CO
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
Facebook is something that upsets me at times.
For example, people you went to school with and never talked to in school adding you.
If you never talked to me in school why now, morons.
And worse is work colleagues tracking you down.
I'm only on it to chat to my cousin overseas!
Yeah man I couldnt agree with you more. Im like dude... :? I didnt even like you when we went to school togeather. The one that really took the cake was when this guy sent me a friend request and he was the same ass hole that stole my Al Merrick. I was like you gotta be freakin kidding me. :shock:
Recently while I was on Facebook, the man who date-raped me in college showed up as "people you might know." Apparently a mutual friend has him as a Friend, at least virtually. I never filed charges, never told people for years afterward, and didn't even think of it as rape until five years ago. But now that I think about it, it infuriates me that he was able to victimize me without consequences. I don't want to bring legal action, or shame him publicly, but I do want him to understand what he did was wrong. I'd like an apology. I think I could easily forgive him if an apology was offered. We were both young. Mistakes are made. That doesn't make it OK.
Should I attempt to contact him, or just let bygones be bygones? Honestly, I could take it or leave it. My only worry is that he will think date rape is OK. (I was extremely drunk, and threw up for hours, and went in and out of consciousness while he had sex with me. He watched me throw up, and then still tried to have sex with me.) I've had a long path recovering from this incident and prior childhood abuse, and I'd hate to think he was still doing the same thing to other women.
All I want to know is that he knows what he did was wrong, and is sorry for it. But is it worth contacting him, if the answer may be "no" or "I don't know what you're talking about"? I worry the attempt of getting a response will be more trouble, emotionally speaking, than the satisfaction of closure from the right answer.
Comments
I also closed it because the one ex that I still have something for, I got tired of seeing pictures of her pop up. I haven't talked to her in a couple years but I always used to look at her profile trying to figure out what she was up to. When she first got on it I wouldn't friend her because I didn't want to see her because it would bother me- she friended me and it just got annoying seeing pictures of her pop up. I would look at her profile to try and figure out where she was living or who she was dating, and it really just brought me down knowing how creepy I was being- so I closed my account and haven't been back on.
So 2 cases of creepiness caused me to close the thing
Maybe I ought to consider the same. The ex I still have something for unfriended me because I was being an asshole and couldn't get over her. Even so, every now and again I go into nosey stalker mode and scope out her profile and pictures. She's still with the guy she left me for and seeing pictures of them traveling the world together and totally happy 2-3 years later always fucks with my head. It can't be healthy.
:shock:
Can I just repeat that I had NO WORRIES at all that she asked to be his friend, but when she got shitty and started accusing me of not being able to move on (wtf???) thats when I thought she had issues with it.
I know in alot of cases people are "friends" with ex's whether it be on FB or day to day life - and thats cool as, but for myself and my partner we didnt feel it was neccassary...and the fact that she went all shitty at us afterwards shows me she is the one who cant move on.
AND she has been adding our friends (or trying to) on FB, so we all have mutual friends, but she hasnt seen or spoken to these people in about 15 years and they hardly know her :?
My hubby doesnt feel comfortable with me having male friends on my MSN chat window contacts list, so there's only female friends on there. I used to try and fight it, because I knew I would never do anything...but he still felt weird about it and I had to respect him and delete my male friends....
All good. Everyones different
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
I wouldnt feel comfortablw with him in an instant chat message room thingy with girls I hadnt met or didnt know when I wasnt home - so it kinda goes both ways
We are both quite similar like that - but I do have male friends, although, come to think of it - none of my OWN from my life before I met my hubby, prolly coz I dated all my male friends in the past
That wouldve been amusing at that Fish and Chip shop Helen
well he introduced them to me... cos they came up to him and a minute later he said 'cmon let's go out for a cigarette' so I figured he didn't like them
I can certainly see where you're coming from about him talking to girls you don't know on msn. I've had friends who had problems with that before so I know what it's like... he's seen me chatting to guys before and just asks 'who's that?' and I tell him and he gets back to watching tv or whatever... but I've never sensed he has any kinda problem with it. He's plenty of female friends who he often chats to but I've made male friends since I got here and if I'm chatting to them he may chat to us for a minute or may not
Anyway, that's kinda verged off topic :oops: and I'm not sure what it has to do with anything
Verona??? it's all surmountable
Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
Wembley? We all believe!
Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
Chicago 07? And love
What a different life
Had I not found this love with you
So no crazy ex stories from me yet... But crazy psychos have unfortunately stalked me like crazy on my social networking sites. I suppose it comes with the territory :( What is with people?
http://thriftstorenightmares.blogspot.com/
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=599947572
~Wild is my love~
Broken hearts make people kinda crazy. I could write 2 albums saying my ex is a worthless cunt and people would call me a sensitive, tortured artist... I pop onto facebook every now and again to see how a woman I once loved is doing these days and I'm a dangerous psychotic stalker.
I'm a pretty social person but I would have to agree with you, (hell, look at my sig). MySpace is not nearly as invasive as Facebook is, where people can find you via your friends even if you keep your alma mater and other info unlisted.
I friended a few ex'es and my friend's ex'es and she started getting harassed by the wife of the ex that made a comment on her profile. Drama! It's like high school again sometimes on here.
Children being involved... I 100% agree with you. I hate the idea of some freaky strangers having access to my kid/family, so I try to keep it on the downlow as much as possible. I've been thinking about weeding out my FB friends for awhile... thanks for reminding me the good reasons why I should
Remember the crazy pizza delivery boy stalker from the old Pit? I hope he didn't make it on to this board
What would Buckcherry do?
woah. Fanch...is it really you?!!!
Probably bust into her bf's place, kick his ass, do lines of coke off his unconscious body, then run a train on each of her best friends while she watched.
But they don't have to worry about passing the character and fitness portion of the bar exam
Typo Man: "Thanks kidz, but remembir, stay in skool!"
Thats funny
Dude, I hope not. Talk about creeeeeeeeeepy!
Or worse, showing up at your door delivering pizza... Eek! The internet is full of a lot of creepos, but luckily a lot of us have good heads on our shoulders
http://thriftstorenightmares.blogspot.com/
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=599947572
~Wild is my love~
Although I do have an ex who I have blocked on Facebook. I don't want that girl any where near me.
Ft Worth 9-15-23
Hartford 5-13-06, 6-27-08, 10-25-13
Mansfield, MA 6-30-08, 6-28-08, 7-2-03, 7-3-03, 7-11-03, 8-29-00, 8-30-00, 9-15-98, 9-16-98
Worcester 10-15-13, 10-16-13
CLEAR!!
Funny thread. I recently ran Facebook's email tool, where it imports your mail contacts from gmail, yahoo ect...and I got a wicked surprise. One of my exes, who has an email address I set up for her a few years ago, popped up with a new last name (of the jerk she cheated on me with). The weird thing is though, that it was pretty much what I call a 'stalker profile'... where someone sets up a profile with only basic information and no headshot for the sole purpose of stalking other people. The only thing that stood out was the fact that she had joined MY GEOGRAPHICAL NETWORK, which, as I found out in my settings, would give her unblocked access to my profile. :shock:
Granted she could be stalking one of the other 300,000 people in the Columbus Network. Perhaps it would be best to just block her.
But since we're on the topic of stalking... I found my first girlfriend's profile the other day. We split on good terms and I haven't heard from her in 19 years or so. I'm not looking to rekindle anything, but I really do wonder what she's been doing with her life and how things turned out. The problem is, if I shoot her a message, she'll obviously know that I 'searched' her name at some point, as we have no mutual friends and live in different states. I just worry that I'll give her that creepy-stalker vibe..which wouldn't be good.
Make your life a mission - not an intermission. - Arnold Gasglow
Who is this guy?
Here I am ladies!!!!
Just kidding, I have no idea who this pizza guy is, but he sounds like a CREEP!!! My girlfriend and I met on the net...I was suprised to find out that she was actually a truly good hearted and beautiful person...until we moved in together...
Back on topic....ahem, FUCK FACEBOOK!
6/12/08 - Tampa, FL
8/23/09 - Chicago, IL
9/28/09 - Salt Lake City, UT (11 years too long!!!)
9/03/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 1
9/04/11 - East Troy, WI - PJ20 - Night 2
Yeah man I couldnt agree with you more. Im like dude... :? I didnt even like you when we went to school togeather. The one that really took the cake was when this guy sent me a friend request and he was the same ass hole that stole my Al Merrick. I was like you gotta be freakin kidding me. :shock:
Someone worse could show up on your people you may know-
http://www.salon.com/mwt/col/tenn/2009/ ... t/col/tenn
March 26, 2009 | Dear Cary,
Recently while I was on Facebook, the man who date-raped me in college showed up as "people you might know." Apparently a mutual friend has him as a Friend, at least virtually. I never filed charges, never told people for years afterward, and didn't even think of it as rape until five years ago. But now that I think about it, it infuriates me that he was able to victimize me without consequences. I don't want to bring legal action, or shame him publicly, but I do want him to understand what he did was wrong. I'd like an apology. I think I could easily forgive him if an apology was offered. We were both young. Mistakes are made. That doesn't make it OK.
Should I attempt to contact him, or just let bygones be bygones? Honestly, I could take it or leave it. My only worry is that he will think date rape is OK. (I was extremely drunk, and threw up for hours, and went in and out of consciousness while he had sex with me. He watched me throw up, and then still tried to have sex with me.) I've had a long path recovering from this incident and prior childhood abuse, and I'd hate to think he was still doing the same thing to other women.
All I want to know is that he knows what he did was wrong, and is sorry for it. But is it worth contacting him, if the answer may be "no" or "I don't know what you're talking about"? I worry the attempt of getting a response will be more trouble, emotionally speaking, than the satisfaction of closure from the right answer.
Want Him to Know