I am curious as to just how long that is.............
yah... kindof an important detail... everyones saying shit like "follow your heart" but unless theyve been dating for months and plan to get married and start their own life together itd be wrong to interfer with the wishes of her family... especially if it puts her in harms way and even though hindu tradition is BS
what he's describing is pretty common among many ethnic groups in this country actually. there was a large south east asian population at my high school (cambodian, vietnamese, laosian,etc) and many, many, of these girls were married off in an arranged marriage the day they turned 18. In jr high this girl I knew would have people drop her off down the street if she got a ride home from white people because her grandmother would freak out. I had a friend when I was like college age who was syrian and her parents hated that she went to college (had to live at home and commute of course) rather than get married off at 18 like her sisters. She was not allowed to go near any guy who wasn't syrian. last time I saw her she had a nonsyrian boyfriend she hadn't told her parents about...I wonder how that turned out.
This statement is very true, that's way most of my relatives hate me, because I'm just too American. They're still pissed off that I forgot my own language for God sakes.
yah... kindof an important detail... everyones saying shit like "follow your heart" but unless theyve been dating for months and plan to get married and start their own life together itd be wrong to interfer with the wishes of her family... especially if it puts her in harms way and even though hindu tradition is BS
i have not thought abotu getting married yet. i can see us getting to that point but not anymore. i am trying to find a balance way to resolve this issue. i don't want her to be harmed but what happens if her family picks some loser for her, will that be harmful also?
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
sorry i don't really watch movies. for a second i thought that this was the moving train and we were going to get into a debate about american politics. sorry!
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
i have not thought abotu getting married yet. i can see us getting to that point but not anymore. i am trying to find a balance way to resolve this issue. i don't want her to be harmed but what happens if her family picks some loser for her, will that be harmful also?
it will certainly be harmful... i dont have beef with very many racial/religious groups... but indian/hindi is certainly one i have problems with... just dont care for their social heirarchy... i think it causes many abusive and/or loveless relationships... in addition to that i dont care for their fashion sense, food, country, how they tip at restaurants, conservative values, etc... thats my inner racist... ive tried in the past and ive known many indians... not something im proud of
they are very stubborn though... the best thing for both you and her is to just walk away from this and retain a friendship... maybe friends with benefits
that is very funny. but i don't consider myself white as my dad was from south america and my mom was from portugal and i was born in portugal. and usually i don't find asian women to be sexy. way to skinny for me. i like meat on a women.
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
it will certainly be harmful... i dont have beef with very many racial/religious groups... but indian/hindi is certainly one i have problems with... just dont care for their social heirarchy... i think it causes many abusive and/or loveless relationships... in addition to that i dont care for their fashion sense, food, country, how they tip at restaurants, conservative values, etc... thats my inner racist... ive tried in the past and ive known many indians... not something im proud of
they are very stubborn though... the best thing for both you and her is to just walk away from this and retain a friendship... maybe friends with benefits
sorry youre in this situation
Oh man. I went to an Indian restaurant a few weeks ago, and I was nice to the Indian gal who was my waitress/hostess (as I always am - I worked food service for six years - my best education ever). Her father (I presume) glared at me with death in his eyes. It was frightening. Hey man, all I did was say "thank you" with a genuine smile!
The food, however, was AWESOME.
My PC disclaimer - This is not directed at any race as a whole, just a response to the guy's post above.
that is very funny. but i don't consider myself white as my dad was from south america and my mom was from portugal and i was born in portugal.
Even worse! You are practically "black" to her family then, probably. As the blog states, you may give a heart attack to her Asian grandmother back home.
Oh man. I went to an Indian restaurant a few weeks ago, and I was nice to the Indian gal who was my waitress/hostess (as I always am - I worked food service for six years - my best education ever). Her father (I presume) glared at me with death in his eyes. It was frightening. Hey man, all I did was say "thank you" with a genuine smile!
The food, however, was AWESOME.
My PC disclaimer - This is not directed at any race as a whole, just a response to the guy's post above.
That Fanch, always going overboard with the PC disclaimers and invites to ACLU meetings...
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Do you really want to have him as a father in law anyways?
i know quiet abit abotu Hindu, when i talked to her about convertion she said that this is not accepted. what kind of religion does not allwo peopel to convert to them so that they can date a girl. i don't want him to be a father-in-law, but i want his daughter.(not in the object way)
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
Aah, fuck it, I’m just gonna go home, turn on the fuckin’ TV...
Watch the nightly news and drink a beer...
Like I could even change the world, yeah right...
************************************
unfortunately, my nephew and his girlfriend are going through the exact same thing. She is a lovely, very intelligent Chinese girl and he is about as caucasion as they come. They both go to a great college, are excellent students and have very bright futures ahead of them.
Unfortunately, if they are to marry, her family will disown her. There will be no exception.
Her father will never accept my nephew. She and her father already butt heads constantly because he is upset with how "Americanized" she has become. In the Chinese culture, daughters are to do what the father says and if not, it is considered a great disrespect.
i know quiet abit abotu Hindu, when i talked to her about convertion she said that this is not accepted. what kind of religion does not allwo peopel to convert to them so that they can date a girl. i don't want him to be a father-in-law, but i want his daughter.(not in the object way)
thats what im talking about! ive never met a group of people so cold and uninviting... not to mention so resistant to change and unforgiving to people different than them...
i should take back what i said before about it being a matter of race... if white people acted the way that the majority of hindu people do i would dislike them to... its entirely about behavior... though im sorry to generalize as i did
unfortunately, my nephew and his girlfriend are going through the exact same thing. She is a lovely, very intelligent Chinese girl and he is about as caucasion as they come. They both go to a great college, are excellent students and have very bright futures ahead of them.
Unfortunately, if they are to marry, her family will disown her. There will be no exception.
Her father will never accept my nephew. She and her father already butt heads constantly because he is upset with how "Americanized" she has become. In the Chinese culture, daughters are to do what the father says and if not, it is considered a great disrespect.
I think it's sad really.
Your nephew should call up her father and ask, "Is it still five dolla?"
i couldn't be with someone (for the long haul) if his family didn't accept me. it would hurt too much.
i understand that, but why would you care? i know i am not married but is it completely wrong that you marry the person you love and if the family doesn't like you then screw them. am i being to rational?
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
i understand that, but why would you care? i know i am not married but is it completely wrong that you marry the person you love and if the family doesn't like you then screw them. am i being to rational?
too rational no
but perhaps you underestimate the influence and emotional effects of family and culture on some people
but perhaps you underestimate the influence and emotional effects of family and culture on some people
i don't know if i will ever understand what people will accept. i love my family but i woudl not stop dating someone becuase they don't like that person background. if my family tells me that they saw my girlfriend kissing someother guy then i will listen to them.
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
i don't know if i will ever understand what people will accept. i love my family but i woudl not stop dating someone becuase they don't like that person background. if my family tells me that they saw my girlfriend kissing someother guy then i will listen to them.
well western cultures are much more flexible to varying backgrounds because the west is a giant melting pot of many cultures-except for some jewish grandmas that is
not as true in the east-deep rooted traditions and beliefs that go way way back-some have been more quick to adopt modern life and the intermingling of cultures, some, such as in your case, have resisted change.
well western cultures are much more flexible to varying backgrounds because the west is a giant melting pot of many cultures-except for some jewish grandmas that is
not as true in the east-deep rooted traditions and beliefs that go way way back-some have been more quick to adopt modern life and the intermingling of cultures, some, such as in your case, have resisted change.
No easy answers.
what i don't understand is that she works at an AIDS service organization like me. the people we work with are not very tradional but the family has no problem with her working there.
People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
what i don't understand is that she works at an AIDS service organization like me. the people we work with are not very tradional but the family has no problem with her working there.
that has absolutely nothing to do with it. thats work, not family.
that you share similar ideals, or enjoying helping others does not translate into " i am going to ignore my family's wishes"
and the otherside, although this may be harsh, is she is not willing to do it for you. at least now anyway. And to me 8 months is not a long time.
Comments
I am curious as to just how long that is.............
Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
8 months, is that considered awhile? for me it is since most of my relationships end after 2 months.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
http://seanbriceart.com/
I think that is a while..........
kinda got distracted here by a little earthquake!!
Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
Go watch The Big Lebowski
And Chinaman isn't the preferred nomenclature...
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EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
i have not thought abotu getting married yet. i can see us getting to that point but not anymore. i am trying to find a balance way to resolve this issue. i don't want her to be harmed but what happens if her family picks some loser for her, will that be harmful also?
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
sorry i don't really watch movies. for a second i thought that this was the moving train and we were going to get into a debate about american politics. sorry!
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
they are very stubborn though... the best thing for both you and her is to just walk away from this and retain a friendship... maybe friends with benefits
sorry youre in this situation
http://seanbriceart.com/
EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
that is very funny. but i don't consider myself white as my dad was from south america and my mom was from portugal and i was born in portugal. and usually i don't find asian women to be sexy. way to skinny for me. i like meat on a women.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
Oh man. I went to an Indian restaurant a few weeks ago, and I was nice to the Indian gal who was my waitress/hostess (as I always am - I worked food service for six years - my best education ever). Her father (I presume) glared at me with death in his eyes. It was frightening. Hey man, all I did was say "thank you" with a genuine smile!
The food, however, was AWESOME.
My PC disclaimer - This is not directed at any race as a whole, just a response to the guy's post above.
Even worse! You are practically "black" to her family then, probably. As the blog states, you may give a heart attack to her Asian grandmother back home.
I heard that, playa! :thumbs up:
That Fanch, always going overboard with the PC disclaimers and invites to ACLU meetings...
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i know quiet abit abotu Hindu, when i talked to her about convertion she said that this is not accepted. what kind of religion does not allwo peopel to convert to them so that they can date a girl. i don't want him to be a father-in-law, but i want his daughter.(not in the object way)
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
Watch the nightly news and drink a beer...
Like I could even change the world, yeah right...
************************************
Unfortunately, if they are to marry, her family will disown her. There will be no exception.
Her father will never accept my nephew. She and her father already butt heads constantly because he is upset with how "Americanized" she has become. In the Chinese culture, daughters are to do what the father says and if not, it is considered a great disrespect.
I think it's sad really.
i should take back what i said before about it being a matter of race... if white people acted the way that the majority of hindu people do i would dislike them to... its entirely about behavior... though im sorry to generalize as i did
http://seanbriceart.com/
Your nephew should call up her father and ask, "Is it still five dolla?"
that was funny.
A bit racist
but funny
i understand that, but why would you care? i know i am not married but is it completely wrong that you marry the person you love and if the family doesn't like you then screw them. am i being to rational?
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
but perhaps you underestimate the influence and emotional effects of family and culture on some people
i don't know if i will ever understand what people will accept. i love my family but i woudl not stop dating someone becuase they don't like that person background. if my family tells me that they saw my girlfriend kissing someother guy then i will listen to them.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
well western cultures are much more flexible to varying backgrounds because the west is a giant melting pot of many cultures-except for some jewish grandmas that is
not as true in the east-deep rooted traditions and beliefs that go way way back-some have been more quick to adopt modern life and the intermingling of cultures, some, such as in your case, have resisted change.
No easy answers.
what i don't understand is that she works at an AIDS service organization like me. the people we work with are not very tradional but the family has no problem with her working there.
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
that has absolutely nothing to do with it. thats work, not family.
that you share similar ideals, or enjoying helping others does not translate into " i am going to ignore my family's wishes"
and the otherside, although this may be harsh, is she is not willing to do it for you. at least now anyway. And to me 8 months is not a long time.