wedding rings

GraySaturday

My husband always wears his wedding ring...

I've never mentioned it. I never said he HAD TO, or commanded him to wear it.. He likes it I guess. He picked it out, its very original with metal and concrete and little itty bity screws. Its very "industrial" looking. He's an architect, so it fits him well.

RolandTD20Kdrummer

It's a subliminal yearning to be single again...

before the tentacles unleashed...

know1

I've done pretty good wearing mine in the short time I've been married, but I probably won't wear it a lot longer. I just can't stand jewelry and it bothers me on my hand. I'll probably wear it when we go out together, but probably not much other than that...but it's due to comfort.

panthergirl

my husband (of 21 years) doesn't wear his (it was silver and totally bent out of shape)
i'll probably get him a new one (white gold) at some point.
my dad (married to my mom for 49 years!) hasn't worn his since the first year they got married.

decides2dream

my husband hasn't worn his wedding band probably since our first year of marriage. it used to bother me, a lot....mostly b/c when we were getting married and i asked if he would wear a wedding ring he said yes, that he would never take it off, he'd be so happy to be my husband, etc. it was quite touching. i realize now, he DId mean it, just didn't realize how annoying he would find wearing a ring. he never wears jewelry, never had, never will. he wears a watch to work, that's it. if i ask, he'll put on his ring when we go out for a special occasion, but that's it.


funny thing, really, neither one of us EVEr wear our 'wedding bands'...not the ones we exchanged when we got married anyway. i designed our rings, and they are beautiful, but a bit too wide, and my ring too wide and thick, also yellow and white gold, not my thing anymore. bought hubby a very thin, plain silver band years later....maybe $20...and that's what he wears when he wears a ring. hahaha. me, hubby bought me a beautiful platinum and diamond band maybe 5 years ago, and that's what i wear alll the time. however, i like to wear jewelry, especially rings....and yes, i like to wear a symbol of his love. i no longer take the fact that he doesn't wear a ring as a 'bad' thing at all anymore, i realize he proves his love and dedication to me every day, no ring is necessary for that.

StateOfLoveBoatCptn.

I did when I was

saveuplife

suffragette wrote:

why don't men who are mrried wear rings?

Great great question. I wear mine all the time.

I noticed that at my old job, all these married men would not wear their wedding rings. It got me thinking about it.

I think we all know the answer why someone would not want to wear a ring.

decides2dream

saveuplife wrote:

Great great question. I wear mine all the time.

I noticed that at my old job, all these married men would not wear their wedding rings. It got me thinking about it.

I think we all know the answer why someone would not want to wear a ring.

HA!
i call bullshit.
one can cheat, or not, just as easily with or without a wedding band on. most who do not wear a wedding band are quite forthcoming of the fact that they ARE married. not wearing a ring is the least of concerns for that imho of course.

harmless_little_f***

urbanhippie wrote:

I think was kind of like his view of marriage....

He alway said marriage was pointless without commitment and that if you had commitment, what was the point of marriage....?

*shrug*

OHH I see.. kinda like 'Music is pointless without guitars, and if you have guitars, what's the point of music?'

:rolleyes:

saveuplife

decides2dream wrote:

HA!
i call bullshit.
one can cheat, or not, just as easily with or without a wedding band on. most who do not wear a wedding band are quite forthcoming of the fact that they ARE married. not wearing a ring is the least of concerns for that imho of course.

I disagree. I think it would be a lot easier for a girl to decide to hook up with a guy who does not have a wedding ring on (and guys know this). Going one step further, I think it would be a lot more likely for a girl to approach/flirt with a guy without a wedding ring (and guys know this). Does that mean the guy needs to respond? Absolutely not. However, it may be his intention to get hit on or to make it easier to flirt. It's a generalization. This does not mean your husband does this.

I know first hand that my wife's single girlfriends always look for a ring on guys that they think are attractive. Some of these girls will approach these guys too (if the guy has no ring and they have had a few too many and built up some liquid courage).

If I know this, other guys know this, including cheat-on-the-wife a-hole guys.

Sian-of-the-dead

If I were married, i'd wear a wedding ring and ideally i'd like my husband to wear one. That doesn't mean i'd make my husband wear one or have a little huff if he didn't. If he chose to or his job dictated or whatever, he could go without. Afterall, it'll be my bed he gets into at night, my face he kisses when he says "I do", our children and my hand he holds as we grow old together.... I don't need a ring of metal to know he's my husband and we're devoted to each other.

Marriage is much more than a piece of paper or a ring on your finger. It's love, friendship, respect and honour... things that no amount of money can buy

CityMouse

saveuplife wrote:

I disagree. I think it would be a lot easier for a girl to decide to hook up with a guy who does not have a wedding ring on (and guys know this). Going one step further, I think it would be a lot more likely for a girl to approach/flirt with a guy without a wedding ring (and guys know this). Does that mean the guy needs to respond? Absolutely not. However, it may be his intention to get hit on or to make it easier to flirt. It's a generalization. This does not mean your husband does this.

I know first hand that my wife's single girlfriends always look for a ring on guys that they think are attractive. Some of these girls will approach these guys too (if the guy has no ring and they have had a few too many and built up some liquid courage).

If I know this, other guys know this, including cheat-on-the-wife a-hole guys.

when they reach a certain age (probably the same age when someone being married is relevant concern), the chance that ANY woman is going to hook up with a guy she just met in a bar, ring or no, diminishes greatly. Hopefully if a guy isn't a wearing a ring, there's more time to investigate whether he's married or not.

the bottom line is that without a ring, you can't be sure if someone you don't know is in a relationship. I don't think that should bar people from ever "approaching" someone to say hi. if they're in a relationship, they'll tell you, and if they don't that's the only part where the problems arise. Besides I don't think there's anything different about approaching a guy who's married who's not wearing vs. a guy in a serious relationship who wouldn't be wearing a ring. either way they're off the market, so what's your point?

decides2dream

saveuplife wrote:

I disagree. I think it would be a lot easier for a girl to decide to hook up with a guy who does not have a wedding ring on (and guys know this). Going one step further, I think it would be a lot more likely for a girl to approach/flirt with a guy without a wedding ring (and guys know this). Does that mean the guy needs to respond? Absolutely not. However, it may be his intention to get hit on or to make it easier to flirt. It's a generalization. This does not mean your husband does this.

I know first hand that my wife's single girlfriends always look for a ring on guys that they think are attractive. Some of these girls will approach these guys too (if the guy has no ring and they have had a few too many and built up some liquid courage).

If I know this, other guys know this, including cheat-on-the-wife a-hole guys.

and i stand by my call.


my response was to this:

saveuplife wrote:

I think we all know the answer why someone would not want to wear a ring.

as if your foregone conclusion is the ONLY reason one would not wear a ring. and i say bullshit. is it A reason? sure, you bet. but i would say MORE don't wear a ring sinmply b/c they don't like to wear jewelry, feel no need for a symbol, etc...than b/c they are looking to flirt and/or cheat. that's all. men AND women both cheat, or don't...and both wear rings, or not. in fact, i know many, many women who do not wear wedding bands either. there are a multitude of reasons for this beyond simply the possibility of cheating. THAT is what i called BS. like most things, lots of reasons out there.

saveuplife

decides2dream wrote:

and i stand by my call.


my response was to this:




as if your foregone conclusion is the ONLY reason one would not wear a ring. and i say bullshit. is it A reason? sure, you bet. but i would say MORE don't wear a ring sinmply b/c they don't like to wear jewelry, feel no need for a symbol, etc...than b/c they are looking to flirt and/or cheat. that's all. men AND women both cheat, or don't...and both wear rings, or not. in fact, i know many, many women who do not wear wedding bands either. there are a multitude of reasons for this beyond simply the possibility of cheating. THAT is what i called BS. like most things, lots of reasons out there.

I understand that there may be allergies or someone may work in a factory... IMHO these are very very understable reasons. But, to say, I just don't like to wear it (when your wife is).... seems pretty weak to me. It takes a bit of time to get use to, but I don't even know I have it on anymore. I'm not advocating forcing your partner to do anything, either. I'm just saying it's not very "fair".

Anyway, I'm done my lenghthy rant. To each his (or her) own.

decides2dream

saveuplife wrote:

I understand that there may be allergies or someone may work in a factory... IMHO these are very very understable reasons. But, to say, I just don't like to wear it (when your wife is).... seems pretty weak to me. It takes a bit of time to get use to, but I don't even know I have it on anymore. I'm not advocating forcing your partner to do anything, either. I'm just saying it's not very "fair".

Anyway, I'm done my lenghthy rant. To each his (or her) own.

it's all cool.


my only 'issue' was the insinuation that there is really only 'one reason' not to wear a wedding band, and as you just pointed out yourself, there are many. whether they 'work' for you or not is another story entirely.


i'm all about personal choice.

riffrandall

Men of a certain era (although probably no one posting here) didn't wear rings- guys who were married in the 1950s generally didn't wear them.

I've known one guy who had an office job & never wore his but he had serious OCD issues & couldn't deal with a ring only on one finger.
There are hazardous occupations- fishermen can't really wear theirs out at sea. That's pretty legit. I'm sure there are others.

Other than that, sorry to say, with guys that work in cubicle farms who are still young enough to be skirt chasers, if they don't wear their ring, it's because they are cheaters.

decides2dream

riffrandall wrote:

Men of a certain era (although probably no one posting here) didn't wear rings- guys who were married in the 1950s generally didn't wear them.

I've known one guy who had an office job & never wore his but he had serious OCD issues & couldn't deal with a ring only on one finger.
There are hazardous occupations- fishermen can't really wear theirs out at sea. That's pretty legit. I'm sure there are others.

Other than that, sorry to say, with guys that work in cubicle farms who are still young enough to be skirt chasers, if they don't wear their ring, it's because they are cheaters.

my gawd, vast sweeping generalizations soooooooo annoy me. but hey, if you want to believe it...go ahead!


guess i am 'safe' then :rolleyes:, my husband is no cube-dweller.


i say, your marriage...wearing rings or not....is as secure as the two of you choose to make it. the day i start worrying about if my husband is wearing a wedding ring or not...is the day i realize i have no trust in my husband, our marriage, whatsoever.


what-evvvveeeerrrrrrrrrrrr..........:p

CityMouse

riffrandall wrote:

Other than that, sorry to say, with guys that work in cubicle farms who are still young enough to be skirt chasers, if they don't wear their ring, it's because they are cheaters.

skirt chasers? are YOU from the 50s?

I just don't agree with this. some people just do not like to wear rings, male or female, like your OCD friend. Some people don't like the look of it or they think it looks tacky. I always wear a watch, a bracelet and 2 rings, but I take them all off when I have do any serious typing.

riffrandall

decides2dream wrote:

my gawd, vast sweeping generalizations soooooooo annoy me. but hey, if you want to believe it...go ahead!


guess i am 'safe' then :rolleyes:, my husband is no cube-dweller.


i say, your marriage...wearing rings or not....is as secure as the two of you choose to make it. the day i start worrying about if my husband is wearing a wedding ring or not...is the day i realize i have no trust in my husband, our marriage, whatsoever.


what-evvvveeeerrrrrrrrrrrr..........:p

It's like a proof in Geometry.

Some men are married.
Not all men wear wedding rings.
Some men are cheaters.
All men who are cheaters don't wear wedding rings.
Not all men who don't wear wedding rings are cheaters.

decides2dream

riffrandall wrote:

It's like a proof in Geometry.

Some men are married.
Not all men wear wedding rings.
Some men are cheaters.
All men who are cheaters don't wear wedding rings.
Not all men who don't wear wedding rings are cheaters.

uhuh....keep telling yourself that. as i said, believe what you want to believe. i know otherwise, and i will leave it at that. life is not black and white. but hey, anyone wants to look at wearing, or not wearing, a wedding ring as some *proof*...go right ahead! i'll stick with my proof.



works for me.


*edit - sorry, i am an idiot. i missed the last line........:o hahahaha. mea culpa! although i STILL disagree, i fully believe there are plenty of cheaters who wear their wedding rings, male and female. and that's it.