Kramer

24

Comments

  • gnr+pj=2bestever
    gnr+pj=2bestever Posts: 358
    harrymanback wrote:
    speaking of ballons, this little one was brought to us by Kamerica Industries:

    "You know, Darren, if you had told me twenty-five years ago that some day I'd be standing here about to solve the world's energy problems, I would've said you were crazy. Now let's push this giant ball of oil out this window."


    haha, one of my favorites.


    "You raise the head, you get blood to the feet."
    Whats got the whole world faking?
  • gnr+pj=2bestever
    gnr+pj=2bestever Posts: 358
    myhook wrote:
    HA, that was on last night.

    HOOCHIE MAMMA!!!!

    lol, i know. That's what inspired this thread.

    "I don't even really work here..."
    Whats got the whole world faking?
  • SilverSeed
    SilverSeed Posts: 336
    gnr+pj=2bestever wrote:
    lol, i know. That's what inspired this thread.

    "I don't even really work here..."

    That's what makes this so hard...
    When Jesus said "Love your enemies" he probably didn't mean kill them...

    "Sometimes I think I'd be better off dead. No, wait, not me, you." -Deep Toughts, Jack Handy
  • myhook
    myhook Posts: 284
    Who Wants To Have Some Fun??
    Hey, you wouldn't hire a clown to fix a leak in the jon so why do you let these hooligans tear down the biz? YEEAAHHH. I don't care if he is Mr. Notorious BIG, can he croon?
  • jackrabbit slim
    jackrabbit slim Posts: 565
    [Kramer wants to use George's car to rescue the pig-man from the hospital]
    Kramer: You got room for the pig-man?
    George: The pig-man can take the bus.
    Kramer: You know, if the pig-man had a car, he'd give you a ride.
    George: How do you know? What if Pigman had a two-seater?
    Kramer: Come on George, be realistic.
  • vedderfan10
    vedderfan10 Posts: 2,497
    c-c-c-c-catfight!!! catfight!!

    (the Scarsdale Surprise episode with Raquel Welsh)
    be philanthropic
  • xavier mcdaniel
    xavier mcdaniel Somewhere in NYC Posts: 9,450
    from the fantasy camp episode:

    Jerry: What happened?
    Cosmo Kramer: Well, you know, we were playing a game and I was pitching, and I was really, you know, throwing some smoke! And Joe Pepitone, he was up, and man, that guy you know, he was crowding the plate.
    Jerry: Wow, Joe Pepitone.
    Cosmo Kramer: Well, Joe Pepitone or not, I own the inside of that plate! So I throw one inside, you know, a little chin music, put him right on his pants. Cause I gotta intimidate when I'm on the mound. Well, the next pitch, he's right back on the same place, so... I had to plunk him.
    Jerry: You plunked him?
    Cosmo Kramer: Oh yeah! Well, he throws down his bat, he comes racing up to the mound. Next thing, both benches are cleared, you know. A brouhaha breaks out between the guys in the camp and the old Yankee players. And as I'm trying to get Moose Skowron off of one of my teammates, somebody pulls me from behind, you know, and I turned around and I popped him. I looked down and, whoa man, it's Mickey. I punched his lights out.
    Reading 2004
    Albany 2006 Camden 2006 E. Rutherford 2, 2006 Inglewood 2006,
    Chicago 2007
    Camden 2008 MSG 2008 MSG 2008 Hartford 2008.
    Seattle 2009 Seattle 2009 Philadelphia 2009,Philadelphia 2009 Philadelphia 2009
    Hartford 2010 MSG 2010 MSG 2010
    Toronto 2011,Toronto 2011
    Wrigley Field 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Philadelphia 2, 2013
    Philadelphia 1, 2016 Philadelphia 2 2016 New York 2016 New York 2016 Fenway 1, 2016
    Fenway 2, 2018
    MSG 2022
    St. Paul, 1, St. Paul 2 2023
    MSG 2024, MSG 2024
    Philadelphia 2024
    "I play good, hard-nosed basketball.
    Things happen in the game. Nothing you
    can do. I don't go and say,
    "I'm gonna beat this guy up."
  • gobrowns19
    gobrowns19 Posts: 1,447
    "I've faked"
    "You've faked kramer!?"
    "Well I was tired and wanted to get some sleep and not hurt her feelings!'
    Happiness is only real when shared
  • gnr+pj=2bestever
    gnr+pj=2bestever Posts: 358
    jackrabbit slim wrote:
    [Kramer wants to use George's car to rescue the pig-man from the hospital]
    Kramer: You got room for the pig-man?
    George: The pig-man can take the bus.
    Kramer: You know, if the pig-man had a car, he'd give you a ride.
    George: How do you know? What if Pigman had a two-seater?
    Kramer: Come on George, be realistic.


    hahhahaha!
    Whats got the whole world faking?
  • NOCODE#1
    NOCODE#1 Posts: 1,477
    mookie9999 wrote:
    "You'd be hanging from..." oh, nevermind.
    kramer never said that. You do understand the concept of a FICTIONAL CHARACTER. FICTIONAL CHARACTER
    Let's not be negative now. Thumper has spoken
  • restlesssoul
    restlesssoul Posts: 6,952
    Kramer: what are you thinking about Jerry? Marriage? Family?

    Jerry: well…..

    Kramer: They’re Prisons! Man Made prisons! You’re doing time. You get up in the morning, shes there. You go to sleep at night, shes there. Its like you gotta ask permission to, to use the bathroom; “Is it alright if I use the bathroom now?”

    Jerry: Really?....

    Kramer: Yeah, Yeah and you can forget about watching TV while your eating. Because its dinnertime. You know what you do at dinner?

    Jerry: What?

    Kramer: You talk about your day. “How was your day today? Did you have a good day today or a bad day today? Well what kind of day was it? Well I don’t know, how bout you how was your day today?”

    Jerry: Im glad we had this talk.

    Kramer: Oh you have no idea.
    Van '98, Sea I+II '00, Sea '01, Sea II '02, Van '03, Gorge, Van, Cal, Edm '05, Bos I+II, Phi I+II, DC, SF II+III, Port, Gorge I+II '06, DC, NY I+II '08, Sea I+II, Van, Ridge , LA III+IV' 09, Indy '10, Cal, Van '11, Lond, Van, Sea '13, Memphis '14, RRHOF '17, Sea I+II '18, Van I+II, Vegas I+II, Sea I+II '24
  • restlesssoul
    restlesssoul Posts: 6,952
    kramer planning his millennium party:



    do you think we will still be using napkins in the year 2000 or is this whole mouth vacuum thing for real?
    Van '98, Sea I+II '00, Sea '01, Sea II '02, Van '03, Gorge, Van, Cal, Edm '05, Bos I+II, Phi I+II, DC, SF II+III, Port, Gorge I+II '06, DC, NY I+II '08, Sea I+II, Van, Ridge , LA III+IV' 09, Indy '10, Cal, Van '11, Lond, Van, Sea '13, Memphis '14, RRHOF '17, Sea I+II '18, Van I+II, Vegas I+II, Sea I+II '24
  • gobrowns19
    gobrowns19 Posts: 1,447
    restlesssoul wrote:
    kramer planning his millennium party:



    do you think we will still be using napkins in the year 2000 or is this whole mouth vacuum thing for real?

    Lol, that's a great one too.

    The post before is all in Kramer's delivery while he's talking all high pitched, haha.
    Happiness is only real when shared
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    "that bird was weak and stupid, he should never have eaten that key."
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    Barry: Excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom.

    Kramer: I'm hip.

    Barry: Hip to the what?

    Kramer: To the whole scene. *sniff*

    Barry: What scene?

    Kramer: The bathroom scene. *sniff, sniff*
  • GreenTeaDisease
    GreenTeaDisease Posts: 3,359
    restlesssoul wrote:
    kramer planning his millennium party:



    do you think we will still be using napkins in the year 2000 or is this whole mouth vacuum thing for real?

    these are my everyday balloons.
  • restlesssoul
    restlesssoul Posts: 6,952
    GreenTeaDisease wrote:
    "that bird was weak and stupid, he should never have eaten that key."


    such a great episode....love when jerry is at the end,he gets caught digging his neighbours bird up, all he says is : " Hey Neighbour"
    hahahahah
    fuck seinfeld rules.
    Van '98, Sea I+II '00, Sea '01, Sea II '02, Van '03, Gorge, Van, Cal, Edm '05, Bos I+II, Phi I+II, DC, SF II+III, Port, Gorge I+II '06, DC, NY I+II '08, Sea I+II, Van, Ridge , LA III+IV' 09, Indy '10, Cal, Van '11, Lond, Van, Sea '13, Memphis '14, RRHOF '17, Sea I+II '18, Van I+II, Vegas I+II, Sea I+II '24
  • gnr+pj=2bestever
    gnr+pj=2bestever Posts: 358
    "it hurts when he drinks orange juice..i mean dog food..juice"
    Whats got the whole world faking?
  • gnr+pj=2bestever
    gnr+pj=2bestever Posts: 358
    hahah man i love kramer


    "Quone! To Quone something"
    Whats got the whole world faking?
  • xavier mcdaniel
    xavier mcdaniel Somewhere in NYC Posts: 9,450
    i forgot what he said exactly, but i love the episode when newman is trying to pick up jerry's girlfriend at the bookstore and kramer is feeding him the lines from behind one of the bookcases.
    Reading 2004
    Albany 2006 Camden 2006 E. Rutherford 2, 2006 Inglewood 2006,
    Chicago 2007
    Camden 2008 MSG 2008 MSG 2008 Hartford 2008.
    Seattle 2009 Seattle 2009 Philadelphia 2009,Philadelphia 2009 Philadelphia 2009
    Hartford 2010 MSG 2010 MSG 2010
    Toronto 2011,Toronto 2011
    Wrigley Field 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Brooklyn 2013 Philadelphia 2, 2013
    Philadelphia 1, 2016 Philadelphia 2 2016 New York 2016 New York 2016 Fenway 1, 2016
    Fenway 2, 2018
    MSG 2022
    St. Paul, 1, St. Paul 2 2023
    MSG 2024, MSG 2024
    Philadelphia 2024
    "I play good, hard-nosed basketball.
    Things happen in the game. Nothing you
    can do. I don't go and say,
    "I'm gonna beat this guy up."

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