Which person would you rather live with?

2

Comments

  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    <smiles>
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • EvilMerlinEvilMerlin Posts: 1,865
    Cat ladies are way hot! You two will both have some wonderful company, and the guys will just swoon for you. :p
  • CosmoCosmo Posts: 12,225
    Person 1 – mild OCD, chronic credit debt.
    Person 2 – mood swings once every two months. During which is verbally abusive
    ...
    For a girlfriend?
    I'd take person #2... Once every 2 month beats once a month and I can pretend I'm deaf.
    Allen Fieldhouse, home of the 2008 NCAA men's Basketball Champions! Go Jayhawks!
    Hail, Hail!!!
  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    EvilMerlin wrote:
    Cat ladies are way hot! You two will both have some wonderful company, and the guys will just swoon for you. :p

    ah...so ladies with glasses and lots of cats do it for ya, huh?

    how about cats with glasses...

    now that is hot!
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • EvilMerlinEvilMerlin Posts: 1,865
    libragirl wrote:
    ah...so ladies with glasses and lots of cats do it for ya, huh?

    how about cats with glasses...

    now that is hot!

    :eek:

    LOL!
  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    :d

    no?
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    well talk about hot this is a hot thread. lol. thanks for all the posts people!

    gonna try one more time

    :D

    : and big d
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • CosmoCosmo Posts: 12,225
    libragirl wrote:
    ah...so ladies with glasses and lots of cats do it for ya, huh?

    how about cats with glasses...

    now that is hot!
    ...
    You know how people put those little sticker of stick figure people that represent their family on the back window of their car?
    well, i'm thinking of putting one woman... and about 100 cats on the back of my car.
    ...
    Or maybe one man... about 7 women... 2 of them pregnant... and about 100 kids.
    Allen Fieldhouse, home of the 2008 NCAA men's Basketball Champions! Go Jayhawks!
    Hail, Hail!!!
  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    Cosmo wrote:
    ...
    You know how people put those little sticker of stick figure people that represent their family on the back window of their car?
    well, i'm thinking of putting one woman... and about 100 cats on the back of my car.
    ...
    Or maybe one man... about 7 women... 2 of them pregnant... and about 100 kids.

    lol...go for it!

    :D
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • FahkaFahka Posts: 3,187
    #2 ... people in credit debt are pretty flakey when it comes to the finances.. which is a major deal in a roommate situation
  • mdigenakismdigenakis Posts: 1,337
    Person 1 – mild OCD, chronic credit debt.
    Person 2 – mood swings once every two months. During which is verbally abusive
    I can handle choice B, Choice A might not pay rent.
    "Don't let the darkness eat you up..."

    -Greg Dulli

  • justamjustam Posts: 21,412
    Person 1 – mild OCD, chronic credit debt.
    Person 2 – mood swings once every two months. During which is verbally abusive


    Don't live with either one. Seriously.
    &&&&&&&&&&&&&&
  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    they buy whatever they want, when they want. rather if they can afford it or not. whenever i think it's stopped....they've got it under control...they buy buy buy again.
    do they know it's a problem? In which case they might be happy handing over the credit card to you :)

    OCD means a clean house without you having to do it :) I'd go with person 1
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • zenithzenith Posts: 3,191
    Person 1 – mild OCD, chronic credit debt.
    Person 2 – mood swings once every two months. During which is verbally abusive

    eerrr - i probably have all those things at one time or another, but my ocd is pretty mild - like i have to make the bed as soon as i get up, or i cant leave dishes in the sink, or if the lounge is crooked ill have to push it back, and my cc debt is small because i deliberately have a small limit, and my verbal abuse probably only consists of telling people to f off and stomp around a bit and be bossy

    :o

    so i guess that means no one would ever live with me, huh ....
    impatience is a gift ........
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    Ok now the weekend is over I’m going to give you insight to my problem.

    Person 1 – is my boyfriend….I hate that term, boyfriend.
    Person 2 – is my mom
    Here’s the kicker, I have Cerebral Palsy. It’s on the severe side. I have lived alone before. So I can do it. But during that year or so I came to the conclusion that a little stress here and there is better than being lonely. So living by myself with a cat is out. Lol.

    I’ve tried dating other guys. Not for me. Brian is really good to me and adores me. We’ve been together ten years. During four years we lived together. We’d still be living together if he hadn’t hit a rough patch. He lost his job and got depressed and ran up debt. That’s how he copes. Some people, smoke or drink, he buys crap.
    I know I have to stop being afraid it might happen again. I can’t live in the past. I think he’s learned his lesson by now. He’s had to roommate with his cousin who’s ten times worse with money.
    But whenever we talk about getting married again his damn OCD makes me have second thoughts.
    “I want my 56” tv in my room.” I think having a ‘man’ room is great, but the way I see it, the big tv should go in the living room. He doesn’t want anybody touching the tv because of his OCD. While this is pettly stuff, it adds up and I feel like exploding. He will only use one mailbox in the whole city. He puts his money in order according to the serial numbers. He won’t get out of the car unless the song is finished. Those things are about the worst of it.

    He needs a pill,
    Mom needs a better pill.
    lol

    My mom has done a great job raising my brother and I all by herself. I truly see why she’s had a hard time with men. no man will deal with the type of mood swings she has. They make no sense. I stopped trying to figure them out when I was in my late teens. When you have a disabled child, without any support, so much of your life is spent taking care of that kid. I just think at certain times this all comes to a boiling point. Though, still it’s no excuse for verbal abuse. We do have fun mother daughter time. but that time has dwindled the longer we live together. I do have aides come in six days a week, so in my opinion she has no reason to be worn out.

    Brian can’t wait for me forever. But we are at a standstill because I want him to get his money straight before we are married. Will that ever happen? I don’t know.

    I hate Mondays! lol

    WHAT SHOULD I DO???????
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    wow..now that those 2 thing are in context it takes on a completely different light. You are sure dealing with a lot but you seem to have a great attitude. As for Brian, it seems like you really care for him and it sounds like by what you said he is not planning on getting in debt again. As for the OCD, I could see how it could be annoying...Is he open to taking medication or discussing it at least? I don't remember what you said. I'm sorry about your mom. I don't have a lot of background to go by and I don't want to pry but sometime people who are like that have gone through some bad stuff in their childhood. I know someone like this and that is the case and they are basically a good person but I guess some people don't have a good coping mechanism. Have you tried having discussions with her? Is she receptive to that?

    Im sorry I don't know what advice to give you. I do hope things get better for you.
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    Yeah my mom knows she ain’t right. Lol. We’ve talked about her mood swings a few times when she’s in a good mood. I think they’ve gotten better with time or I’ve gotten better at dealing with them. I’m not sure which. I glad we talk about it, but it doesn’t help in my opinion. Her past has definitely damaged her. And in some ways, her past is damaging me. But I guess that’s the case with every parent and child. It’s so unfair thou!

    I have a strong feeling Brian doesn’t want help for his OCD.
    We’ve talked about his cycle, and he acknowledges it. Poor self esteem leads to feeling bad leads to spending beyond his means which brings him back full circle of feeling bad because he’s in debt.
    I try to cheer him up and get him to talk about it when I see the first stages of the cycle happening. But it does little to no good.

    I did ask him if he’s ever missed a rent payment this weekend. We both couldn’t think of a time where he did.
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    Yeah my mom knows she ain’t right. Lol. We’ve talked about her mood swings a few times when she’s in a good mood. I think they’ve gotten better with time or I’ve gotten better at dealing with them.quote]

    Well at least she's aware of it and she's getting better. As for Brian, I think he needs to want to get help and it doesn't look like he's ready or willing right now. Now this only my opinion, I don't live with him so I don't know how bad the ocd could be, but I think the credit card debt is worse. As long as he has that under control, it's not so bad.
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    you're fast! lol

    wrong, mom is aware but will not ever get better.
    more i think about it.......it's the 2nd. i've gotten better at dealing with it.

    brian has shown more progress than her.

    thanks for reading. :)
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • the wolfthe wolf Posts: 7,027
    ill take person # 2. i can yell back with the best of them!

    and the chronic debt would lead me to believe getting money for the bills out of person # 1 would just be too much a pain in the ass to go through every month.
    Peace, Love.


    "To question your government is not unpatriotic --
    to not question your government is unpatriotic."
    -- Sen. Chuck Hagel
  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    libragirl wrote:

    Well at least she's aware of it and she's getting better. As for Brian, I think he needs to want to get help and it doesn't look like he's ready or willing right now. Now this only my opinion, I don't live with him so I don't know how bad the ocd could be, but I think the credit card debt is worse. As long as he has that under control, it's not so bad.
    It sounds like Brian is really trying to make it work though... he's making an effort. You say he won't wait forever, how about making an ultimatum and suggesting once he gets help with his ocd you'll settle?

    And if not, I don't mean this in a bad way, but if he's going to cope with your disability and help you, perhaps you can cope with some of his imperfections? Give and take... and really, nobody IS perfect. Again I don't mean to offend.
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    That is a really good point. Glad you mentioned it.
    I do feel like a hypocrite at times when I have no patience for his OCD. And really I have no excuse for myself. The only thing I have come up with for me to cope is to leave the room when the OCD flares. I do wish I could get out of the car myself when he does ‘let the song finish’ thou! Hehehe. My fear is it will get worse with age. But then I can’t live in fear, gotta bite the bullet. Within the last 6 months, he’s developed this new thing. Which is why I’m worried about it getting worse. He watches the all credits before turning off the dvd.

    I’ll feel like a bitch if I were to add a second ultimatum at this point. First was to get out of debt. From what I can tell, he’s been doing that. But here’s the other thing….i don’t know for sure because he keeps me in the dark about his money. I told him if we live together that has to end.

    I’m leaning towards Brian.
    As pointed out, he’s made better progress than my mother.
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • Heineken HelenHeineken Helen Posts: 18,095
    That is a really good point. Glad you mentioned it.
    I do feel like a hypocrite at times when I have no patience for his OCD. And really I have no excuse for myself. The only thing I have come up with for me to cope is to leave the room when the OCD flares. I do wish I could get out of the car myself when he does ‘let the song finish’ thou! Hehehe. My fear is it will get worse with age. But then I can’t live in fear, gotta bite the bullet. Within the last 6 months, he’s developed this new thing. Which is why I’m worried about it getting worse. He watches the all credits before turning off the dvd.

    I’ll feel like a bitch if I were to add a second ultimatum at this point. First was to get out of debt. From what I can tell, he’s been doing that. But here’s the other thing….i don’t know for sure because he keeps me in the dark about his money. I told him if we live together that has to end.

    I’m leaning towards Brian.
    As pointed out, he’s made better progress than my mother.
    Ok, are you sure these things aren't simply symptoms of a bigger picture? If you REALLY love someone it probably wouldn't annoy you at all to just wait til the song's over or the credits are over. Do you think you could make yourself start thinking that it's something cute rather than something annoying? If not, I mean OCD's not just something that's gonna go away overnight... even if he gets help. Just imagine what it will be like to live with him. Are these things REALLY gonna drive you nuts?

    I think you were right to tell him that you want knowledge of his funds. Especially if he WANTS help with credit... he's gonna need to let somebody help him.

    Sooooooooooooooo... ARE you just making excuses? Be honest!
    The Astoria??? Orgazmic!
    Verona??? it's all surmountable
    Dublin 23.08.06 "The beauty of Ireland, right there!"
    Wembley? We all believe!
    Copenhagen?? your light made us stars
    Chicago 07? And love
    What a different life
    Had I not found this love with you
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    I come from the ‘Love isn’t enough’ mindset.

    And I thought it was the opposite…
    Things you find cute will become annoying over time.

    Yes, I’m not perfect. I get the point you’re trying to make.
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • AmentsChickAmentsChick Posts: 6,969
    Absolutely #1...in a heartbeat. I don't do well with verbal abuse.
    This is the greatest band in the world -- Ben Harper

  • libragirllibragirl Posts: 4,632
    Absolutely #1...in a heartbeat. I don't do well with verbal abuse.

    ah..see I went with #2...I can deal with sporadic verbal abuse..:p
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    :)
    you know, i'm my situation the OCD is better than verbal abuse.

    her verbal abuse makes me want to kill my self. it really hurts.
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

  • EvilMerlinEvilMerlin Posts: 1,865
    :)
    you know, i'm my situation the OCD is better than verbal abuse.

    her verbal abuse makes me want to kill my self. it really hurts.

    So does that make your answer then?

    If someone makes you feel that way, you should never willingly choose to put yourself into that situation, no matter how annoying the other option may be.

    I'd much rather be annoyed than hurt and having hurtful feelings toward myself and I'd hate to see anyone put into that position.
  • In My DreamsIn My Dreams Posts: 299
    Edit: Posted before reading the entire thread. :o
    A real possibility I may meet you in my dreams ~ I go to sleep
  • blondieblue227blondieblue227 Va, USA Posts: 4,509
    yes it does, EvilMerlin. thank you. :D

    now all i have to wait on is him paying his credit card. he says he wants to do that before we look at homes.

    this damn thing has come full circle.
    i'm pretty sure he has enough funds saved plus extra to pay it off now.
    which was the case when i asked him to pay it off in the first place. a few years ago. he had the money and didn't pay it off. i asked him to move out. well that.....and because he was jobless for 8 months.

    why can't he pay it off now?
    (that'll be the next talk we have)
    *~Pearl Jam will be blasted from speakers until morale improves~*

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