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help me decipher this e-mail

spongersponger Posts: 3,159
edited April 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
I went a friend's wedding a couple of years ago and it compelled me to e-mail my ex-g/f from my high school days and ask her to marry me. I had not seen or talked to her in years.

I did not respond to her response because I figured she was politely telling me to get lost. Also, she's devoutly catholic and I told her that I was still an atheist -hence her PS response.

Thank you for the nice email. Definitely made me
smile. It's nice to know that you think highly of me.
I consider my "teen years" to be a bit of an
emarassment. I wasn't the person I could have been, or
should have been. I too made some mistakes back then.
And was, at times, a royal pain in the ass. It's nice
to know that you could see a good person there,
despite the teen angst.

PS - There's nothing wrong with being an atheist

A polite "get lost", right?
reigning champion

http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • memememe Posts: 4,695
    So this exchange happened two years ago?
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    meme wrote:
    So this exchange happened two years ago?

    Yes and she was just recently married and it made me remember this e-mail.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • PearlJamaholicPearlJamaholic Posts: 2,019
    i would send it to the fbi i tried to decode it and all i got was

    "zombie plague"
    "new york"
    "kill all humans"
    "world peace"
    http://db.etree.org/PearlJamaholic
  • Lukin66Lukin66 Posts: 3,063
    uhhhhhhhh, okay...
    deep, deep blue of the morning
    gets to me every time
  • memememe Posts: 4,695
    sponger wrote:
    Yes and she was just recently married and it made me remember this e-mail.

    Well, this is kind of pointless now then, but I would have considered it a fairly reasonable response to a marriage proposal coming through email from someone I have not seen in years :p. I don't think she meant "leave me alone and don't contact me again". Perhaps you could have earned some face time to get reacquainted and marry her eventually :)
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    meme wrote:
    Well, this is kind of pointless now then, but I would have considered it a fairly reasonable response to a marriage proposal coming through email from someone I have not seen in years :p. I don't think she meant "leave me alone and don't contact me again". Perhaps you could have earned some face time to get reacquainted and marry her eventually :)

    Wow, that is not what I wanted to hear.

    I figured she was saying that I embarrass her because I remind her of mistakes that she's made. And I thought if she wanted to pursue further conversation, that she would've asked me a question to keep the conversation going...such as, "how have you been?"
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • OneLoveOneLove Posts: 563
    sponger wrote:
    Wow, that is not what I wanted to hear.

    I figured she was saying that I embarrass her because I remind her of mistakes that she's made. And I thought if she wanted to pursue further conversation, that she would've asked me a question to keep the conversation going...such as, "how have you been?"

    Aww, I'm sorry. I think she was trying to leave the door open.... Any idea if she was already with her husband at this time?
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    OneLove wrote:
    Aww, I'm sorry. I think she was trying to leave the door open.... Any idea if she was already with her husband at this time?


    have no idea. but thanks.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • OneLoveOneLove Posts: 563
    sponger wrote:
    have no idea. but thanks.

    Well, you can't live in regret. You spoke from your heart, you would be happy about that (seriuosly, how many people here have the stones to do that?...it took guts on your part). As for the result, just have faith that it is the way it should be. You may not know why right now..and I know thats a tough pill to swallow.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    OneLove wrote:
    Well, you can't live in regret. You spoke from your heart, you would be happy about that (seriuosly, how many people here have the stones to do that?...it took guts on your part). As for the result, just have faith that it is the way it should be. You may not know why right now..and I know thats a tough pill to swallow.


    That's the thing...it was extremely difficult to type out those words on my keyboard. I was almost trembling at the idea of what a fool I was making out of myself by proposing to a woman with whom I have not had a conversation since she was 17.

    So, even the slightest indication of her lack of interest was all I needed for me to drop the idea entirely and crawl back into my shell for awhile.

    Ah, well, such is life. Thanks again. Now I fight the urge to hit the reply button on that e-mail.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • memememe Posts: 4,695
    sponger wrote:
    Wow, that is not what I wanted to hear.

    I figured she was saying that I embarrass her because I remind her of mistakes that she's made. And I thought if she wanted to pursue further conversation, that she would've asked me a question to keep the conversation going...such as, "how have you been?"


    I'm sorry... I am not saying she was anxiously waiting for you to respond so she could come over and accept your proposal :). It doesn't do you any good to dwell in the past at this point.
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    meme wrote:
    I'm sorry... I am not saying she was anxiously waiting for you to respond so she could come over and accept your proposal :). It doesn't do you any good to dwell in the past at this point.


    She called it her "teen years." That sounds like minimalization to me.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • OneLoveOneLove Posts: 563
    sponger wrote:
    That's the thing...it was extremely difficult to type out those words on my keyboard. I was almost trembling at the idea of what a fool I was making out of myself by proposing to a woman with whom I have not had a conversation since she was 17.

    So, even the slightest indication of her lack of interest was all I needed for me to drop the idea entirely and crawl back into my shell for awhile.

    Ah, well, such is life. Thanks again. Now I fight the urge to hit the reply button on that e-mail.

    I am probably a bad influence, but I think you should email her again. You obviously feel very strongly about this. Make sure if you do it, it is for the right reasons (sorry, can't help you there).

    Truely, everything happens with relationships for a reason. If the two of you were ment to be together, you will, if everyone is more honest than scared.

    It couldn't hurt to email her, tell her congratulations...etc.

    Have you just never stopped thinking about her?

    I feel for you man.... chicks are complicated creatures (I know because I am one).
  • sweetpotatosweetpotato Posts: 1,278
    sponger wrote:
    I went a friend's wedding a couple of years ago and it compelled me to e-mail my ex-g/f from my high school days and ask her to marry me. I had not seen or talked to her in years.

    I did not respond to her response because I figured she was politely telling me to get lost. Also, she's devoutly catholic and I told her that I was still an atheist -hence her PS response.




    A polite "get lost", right?

    mmm, i'm thinking the email marriage proposal was a red flag to her that screamed, "LOSER". :rolleyes:
    "Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States, Barack Obama."

    "Obama's main opponent in this election on November 4th (was) not John McCain, it (was) ignorance."~Michael Moore

    "i'm feeling kinda righteous right now. with my badass motherfuckin' ukulele!"
    ~ed, 8/7
  • OneLoveOneLove Posts: 563
    meme wrote:
    I'm sorry... I am not saying she was anxiously waiting for you to respond so she could come over and accept your proposal :). It doesn't do you any good to dwell in the past at this point.

    No, don't dwell in the past....but do live genuinely in the present. If that means emailing her again, then do it.

    If this is an outside influence issue (i.e. you just broke up witha girl.. or whatever else made you think of her again)...then maybe its not a good idea.
  • OneLoveOneLove Posts: 563
    sweetpotato wrote:
    mmm, i'm thinking the email marriage proposal was a red flag to her that screamed, "LOSER". :rolleyes:

    Ok, maybe the email marriage purposal was a bit extreme.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    I don't have a phone number. Otherwise I would've called her.

    You guys think I should e-mail her even though she's married now? She had this huge wedding Savannah Georgia and her catholic faith would not approve of a divorce.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • memememe Posts: 4,695
    sponger wrote:
    She called it her "teen years." That sounds like minimalization to me.

    I think you were overreacting. Sounds like a statement of fact to me.
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • SENROCKSENROCK Posts: 10,736
    sponger wrote:
    I went a friend's wedding a couple of years ago and it compelled me to e-mail my ex-g/f from my high school days and ask her to marry me. I had not seen or talked to her in years.

    I did not respond to her response because I figured she was politely telling me to get lost. Also, she's devoutly catholic and I told her that I was still an atheist -hence her PS response.




    A polite "get lost", right?
    the chick sort of left the door open for you in a way. you snoozed huh?
    ~~~~~~ALWAYS HAVE A GOOD TIME~~~~~~
    Sir Mike McCready is....THE MASTER!!! WAHHH!!!
    EVENFLOW PSYCHOS H.N.I.C~FEEL THE FLOW!!!

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  • memememe Posts: 4,695
    sponger wrote:
    I don't have a phone number. Otherwise I would've called her.

    You guys think I should e-mail her even though she's married now? She had this huge wedding Savannah Georgia and her catholic faith would not approve of a divorce.

    Are you just taking us for a ride?

    No, I don't think you should email her, nor do I think it remotely likely that she would divorce the husband she just married to accept your second email marriage proposal.
    ... and the will to show I will always be better than before.
  • Drowned OutDrowned Out Posts: 6,056
    sponger wrote:
    I don't have a phone number. Otherwise I would've called her.

    You guys think I should e-mail her even though she's married now? She had this huge wedding Savannah Georgia and her catholic faith would not approve of a divorce.
    A marriage proposal should be done face to face...you should have found a way to see her before taking that step.
    It wouldn't hurt to contact her, but I would be WAY less direct with your advances....and I would def not get your hopes up for anything more than a brief convo or two.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    Yes I know marriage proposals should be done face to face. It's just that she lives 2 hrs away and whenever I dropped her an e-mail over the years she was always in a relationship.

    I had no doubt in my mind that I wanted to her marry, so I thought I'd just throw it out there so I could get it over and done with.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • Drowned OutDrowned Out Posts: 6,056
    sponger wrote:
    Yes I know marriage proposals should be done face to face. It's just that she lives 2 hrs away and whenever I dropped her an e-mail over the years she was always in a relationship.

    I had no doubt in my mind that I wanted to her marry, so I thought I'd just throw it out there so I could get it over and done with.
    :D
    ya, but man...we're talking marriage here. If you're trying to sweep a girl off her feet that you haven't seen in years, you better put a little effort into it! A two hour drive/bus ride shouldn't be a big deal for a marriage proposal...
  • Motown322Motown322 Posts: 465
    Is this thread for real????? :D "She was two hours away" and "always had a boyfriend" and wanted to "throw it out there so I could get it over and done with"... sounds pretty romantic... every young lady's dream proposal. :)

    Email marriage proposal = Wrong Call #1
    Emailing her again = Wrong Call #2

    She's married... the last email (IMO) was a blow-off... chalk this one up to live and learn.
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    Motown322 wrote:
    the last email (IMO) was a blow-off...

    I agree. Thank you for your opinion.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • brain of cbrain of c Posts: 5,213
    she wants you more than you want her.
    d'oh!!!!!!

    http://www.myspace.com/brain_of_c
  • spongersponger Posts: 3,159
    Drowned Out wrote:
    :D
    A two hour drive/bus ride shouldn't be a big deal.

    For the record, I do not ride the bus. But I don't think there's anything wrong with riding the bus. In fact, I think it's good for the environment.
    reigning champion

    http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
  • LONGRDLONGRD Posts: 6,036
    Dude, no offense but I think she's moved on in her life and I think you should to.
    PJ- 04/29/2003.06/24,25,27,28,30/2008.10/27,28,30,31/2009
    EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
  • LONGRDLONGRD Posts: 6,036
    Motown322 wrote:
    Is this thread for real????? :D "She was two hours away" and "always had a boyfriend" and wanted to "throw it out there so I could get it over and done with"... sounds pretty romantic... every young lady's dream proposal. :)

    Email marriage proposal = Wrong Call #1
    Emailing her again = Wrong Call #2

    She's married... the last email (IMO) was a blow-off... chalk this one up to live and learn.
    It's the new modern romance.
    emails, chats and webcams :p
    PJ- 04/29/2003.06/24,25,27,28,30/2008.10/27,28,30,31/2009
    EV- 08/09,10/2008.06/08,09/2009
  • GraySaturdayGraySaturday Posts: 2,878
    sponger wrote:
    For the record, I do not ride the bus. But I don't think there's anything wrong with riding the bus. In fact, I think it's good for the environment.

    She probably digs guys who take the bus..

    Just kidding.. but it seems like there was a reason it ended, and maybe a snap marriage proposal was taken as nothing more then a joking way to break the ice and reconnect via email. If I got a marriage proposal via email from an old boyfriend, I would write back, but I wouldn't take it seriously. That being said, once I wrote back and never heard from that person ever again, I would totally chalk it up to a joke, and be annoyed at myself that I wrote back in the first place, because I'd feel like you were mocking me.

    But that is just me. I say if she is married and its been that long, then its time to chalk it up to a loss, and move on.
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