What is it like being an "only child"?

Gossard_Is_God

decides2dream wrote:

our moms have the same birthday.

and me and edvedder913 have the same birthday :P

decides2dream

Gossard_Is_God wrote:

and me and edvedder913 have the same birthday :P

i think you and edvedder913 have just a few more years between you.......;) whereas our moms have the EXACT same birthday...day and year.


and....are you an only child?
(trying to maintain topic integrity)

colorsblend

xavier mcdaniel wrote:

it would be nice to have a sibling a few years older or younger than me.

Agreed. I'm a only child and the daughter of a single mom. I would have loved to have an older brother. My mom and I have a fantastic relationship, we're more like friends, and I've very close to my maternal grandparents. I practically was raised by my grandma, while my mom worked.

While it was great growing up as an only child, and I do admit that I'm spoiled because of it, I look at my friends who have siblings and I'm jealous. As my family is very small, one of my worries is that I'll be alone when I'm elderly. I have a few cousins near my age, but unlike my mom's generation, we didn't grow up close to one another. I would love to marry someone who has a large(r) family that he's close with. Of course, he'll have to deal with the fact that I don't want kids.

edvedder913

Gossard_Is_God wrote:

and me and edvedder913 have the same birthday :P

hello fellow virgo! you must be great

catefrances

riffrandall wrote:

I am an only child & I have an only child. I'm all about the zero population growth. (Not really, it just worked out that way.)
....

if you were all for ZPG, you wouldnt have had any children at all. i have 4 children, so obviously i dont give a shit.

in_hiding79

Brain of J.Lo wrote:

Did anyone here grow up without siblings? What was it like? Do/did you ever wish it was different?

I have three older sisters and three older brothers!! I guess I wouldn't know what it is like being an only child!!

brainofme

i'm an only child and i hate it. maybe you get more attention/presents, but it's definitely not worth it. my parents divorced when i was 6 and it would have been much better if i had a sibling who i could have shared my situation/experiences with. my whole family isn't very close, so my family is actually just my mum and grandma. it has always been very difficult for me when my mum was sick/had to be in hospital. nobody to share your worries with etc.

i guess there's nothing better than having a good relationship with your siblings. i always wanted some.

upina2001

Brain of J.Lo wrote:

Do you ever worry that the burden of caring for elderly parents will fall solely on your shoulders? (I don't know your personal situation, of course...but this is one thing I'm very curious about. And yes, I know that's a random thought, but I'm trying to cover all the bases while I worry about this. )

some cultures it's an honor to take care of your parents when they are old.

redrock

My daughter is an only child and she loves it. She has a good social network, lots of friends, etc. When I compare with her friends with siblings, she has to 'get herself out there' a lot more as she cannot 'rely' on a sibling to alleviate boredom, etc. She is a lot more independent and can sort herself out a lot more than friends with siblings. Obviously, she always has us (her parents) to share things with/do things, etc. but as she gets older, her social network takes good care of those needs.

I have a sister and, whilst she IS my sister and I love her as such, we are just too different and we have never been 'friends', even if we are very close in age (18 months difference). It has always been like that and I think always will be. As we were uprooted a lot during our childhood (army brats), my parent thought we would sort of 'stick together'. We never did as we never had the same interests or same kind of friends.

So, all in all, being an only child doesn't automatically mean this child is lonely, has no one to share feelings/burdens with, etc. And having siblings doesn't automatically mean the contrary!

As for taking care of an older parent, if the child is not capable to do so for various reasons, there are networks in place to help.

brainofme

redrock wrote:

So, all in all, being an only child doesn't automatically mean this child is lonely, has no one to share feelings/burdens with, etc. And having siblings doesn't automatically mean the contrary!

right, but as i said if there are any family/health problems, a person who is basically in the same situation as you, can understand you better.

if you talk about these things with a friend, they can go home and live their life, but your sibling has the same home as you.

Brain of J.Lo

upina2001 wrote:

some cultures it's an honor to take care of your parents when they are old.

As well it should be. I plan to take great care of my mom, like she did her own.

As I already explained, I used the term "burden" as a replacement for the word "responsibility". I was trying to highlight the difference between being solely responsible for the care of aging parents vs. sharing that responsibility with siblings. As others have pointed out, those situations can be very different experiences.

Brain of J.Lo

Thanks for sharing your experiences. This thread is very interesting!

BetterManningNYG

i was an only child. if i ever have kids, it'll be more than one.