Why do men feel women are so disposable?

Dylan Stone

Sian-of-the-dead wrote:

I know a hell of a lot of good, honest men who would never in a million years even consider 'disposing' of a woman.

And...if you treat someone like shit.... maybe you are "disposing" of them...

But I think a lot of people walk away from relationships because simply...they change. And sometimes when one party decides to open their eyes that the relationship has changed... because they have both changed and grown as idividuals... and therefore... may not be very well suited for each other anymore... well once the eyes are opened... they are opened WIDE... and one or both parties move one... often quickly... and sometimes without much notice...

But the notice is usually there. The writing is usually on the wall written in 17 foot high red block letters.

So goes life.

nuffingman

Jacqueline and her husband Marc went for counselling after 25 years of marriage.
When asked what the problem was, Jacqueline went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking Jacqueline to stand, unbuttoned her blouse, embraced her, put his hands on her breasts, and kissed her passionately as her husband Marc watched with a raised eyebrow.

Jacqueline shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down as though in a daze..
The therapist turned to Marc and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?'
Marc thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf.'

SomethingCreative

I don't feel that way at all

but women seem to be attracted to assholes so maybe I should start thinking this way.

harmless_little_f***

GTFLYGIRL wrote:

And...if you treat someone like shit.... maybe you are "disposing" of them...

But I think a lot of people walk away from relationships because simply...they change. And sometimes when one party decides to open their eyes that the relationship has changed... because they have both changed and grown as idividuals... and therefore... may not be very well suited for each other anymore... well once the eyes are opened... they are opened WIDE... and one or both parties move one... often quickly... and sometimes without much notice....

That's what my ex told herself to releave the guilt of leaving me. 'Opened her eyes wide'? Yawn.

'People just change'. What a disgustingly lazy excuse.

Sian-of-the-dead

harmless_little_f*** wrote:

That's what my ex told herself to releave the guilt of leaving me. 'Opened her eyes wide'? Yawn.

'People just change'. What a disgustingly lazy excuse.

I don't believe it's an excuse for most people.

My ex and me really did change, have our eyes opened and grew apart. We'd been together for over 6 years since I was 16 and we'd become different types of adult. We get on better now, as friends, than we did in the last 2 and half years of our relationship.

I understand that this isn't always the case but most of the time, I believe it is. Although most people don't see it with clarity until sometime after the event.

Dylan Stone

harmless_little_f*** wrote:

'People just change'

But they do. Without a doubt people grow and change and often the changes they each undergo over a period of years take very divergent courses.

Sad (?) but true.

eyedclaar

Sian-of-the-dead wrote:

I don't believe it's an excuse for most people.

My ex and me really did change, have our eyes opened and grew apart. We'd been together for over 6 years since I was 16 and we'd become different types of adult. We get on better now, as friends, than we did in the last 2 and half years of our relationship.

I understand that this isn't always the case but most of the time, I believe it is. Although most people don't see it with clarity until sometime after the event.

Agreed. It happens. I was married at age 21 and by the age of 25 we were two totally different people. I don't feel bad about leaving that marriage, quite the opposite actually.

Sian-of-the-dead

eyedclaar wrote:

Agreed. It happens. I was married at age 21 and by the age of 25 we were two totally different people. I don't feel bad about leaving that marriage, quite the opposite actually.

I'm the same about my relationship. I'm happy that it happened, even happy about how it happened. It made me realise we'd changed so much and that something had to be done.

Heineken Helen

ah yahamita... sorry you're going through this... and I understand you're just venting right now :( it's good to go through phases of staying away from the opposite sex too and clearing your head. Although there really are some GREAT men out there... some of my very very best friends are men and I can talk to them even better than my female friends. Don't let this one prick destroy your view of all men! :(

Sian-of-the-dead

Heineken Helen wrote:

Don't let this one prick destroy your view of all men! :(

What she said

eyedclaar

Heineken Helen wrote:

Although there really are some GREAT men out there... :(

Ah schucks, please go on...

Sian-of-the-dead

eyedclaar wrote:

Ah schucks, please go on...

Grinch's don't count :mad:

Heineken Helen

eyedclaar wrote:

Ah schucks, please go on...

Don't worry, I wasn't talking about you

eyedclaar

Heineken Helen wrote:

Don't worry, I wasn't talking about you

C'mon now, I might be the sweetest guy I know.

Heineken Helen

eyedclaar wrote:

C'mon now, I might be the sweetest guy I know.

don't get out much?

just kidding with ya... I think underneath that hard exterior... lies a man!

Trailer

SomethingCreative wrote:

I don't feel that way at all

but women seem to be attracted to assholes so maybe I should start thinking this way.

Depends how old you are. When I was younger, I was kind of an asshole because that's what seemed to get me laid.:o Asshole is not really the best word... it had more to do with being a confident, alpha male type that believed he was a better choice than all the other males around him. It was good for attracting them for sex, but if you wanted a relationship then you'd have to change or else you would be an asshole. As I got older I matured, and luckily women seemed to change with me. Or maybe I just changed because they did. All I know is that the older a woman gets, the less likely she is going to want to be with an asshole. That's just my opinion though...

eyedclaar

Heineken Helen wrote:

don't get out much?

just kidding with ya... I think underneath that hard exterior... lies a man!

It's true, I don't get out much and the only person I really know is my roommate who happens to be the grand master dragon of the KKK. So, by comparison... Obviously, we don't see eye to eye on most issues, but I'll be goddamned if that mofo doesn't whip up the world's best waffles.

Sian-of-the-dead

eyedclaar wrote:

It's true, I don't get out much and the only person I really know is my roommate who happens to be the grand master dragon of the KKK. So, by comparison... Obviously, we don't see eye to eye on most issues, but I'll be goddamned if that mofo doesn't whip up the world's best waffles.

This post made me laugh Lilt zero outta my nose

Milestone

yahamita wrote:

When will our men return to being a man of honor to his woman

Which time period would you like to return to?

Perhaps back when women did not have the right to vote?

Perhaps when women had to sit on the opposite side of the church than the men?

Perhaps back to when it was laughable to hire a woman in the business world?

Perhaps back to a day when a woman didn't have a chance to run for public office?

Yeah, the good old days.....when men respected women.

Dylan Stone

Milestone wrote:

Which time period would you like to return to?

Perhaps back when women did not have the right to vote?

Perhaps when women had to sit on the opposite side of the church than the men?

Perhaps back to when it was laughable to hire a woman in the business world?

Perhaps back to a day when a woman didn't have a chance to run for public office?

Yeah, the good old days.....when men respected women.

Where have all the cowboys gone?

BinGnarly

yahamita wrote:

the society we live in today, where everything seems to be so easily disposed of and replaceable, what has this done to our men? The way they use and treat woman like a used car, trade her in for something that looks better! I would love to see a study done on how many marriages or relationships were destroyed because of sleeze internet dating sites.
When will our men return to being a man of honor to his woman, thinking the grass is always greener on the other side, however, that beautiful green grass you once had is gone, and all you have left is dead hay!

You must be looking in all the wrong places lady.

Lizard

Lisa--sorry this shit happened to you.

I think you picked a crappy guy--there are crappy people in both genders.

Take care~~hope things get brighter soon!

yahamita

nuffingman wrote:

Jacqueline and her husband Marc went for counselling after 25 years of marriage.
When asked what the problem was, Jacqueline went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 25 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking Jacqueline to stand, unbuttoned her blouse, embraced her, put his hands on her breasts, and kissed her passionately as her husband Marc watched with a raised eyebrow.

Jacqueline shut up, buttoned up her blouse, and quietly sat down as though in a daze..
The therapist turned to Marc and said, 'This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?'
Marc thought for a moment and replied, 'Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I play golf.'

I sooooooooooo needed this laugh today, thank you soooooooooooo much!

AnnaMelinda

yahamita wrote:

I would love to see a study done on how many marriages or relationships were destroyed because of sleeze internet dating sites.

Or even just this site. :rolleyes:



Sorry to hear you're having a rough time of things.

Remember: No matter how cold the winter.... there's a spring time ahead

yahamita

Heineken Helen wrote:

ah yahamita... sorry you're going through this... and I understand you're just venting right now :( it's good to go through phases of staying away from the opposite sex too and clearing your head. Although there really are some GREAT men out there... some of my very very best friends are men and I can talk to them even better than my female friends. Don't let this one prick destroy your view of all men! :(

Thanks Helen! All of my friends are guys except for 3..Its easier that way. I see how my guy friends treat their women, and I do know there are decent ones out there, but yes, I am venting at the moment.

Lizardjam

the wolf wrote:

i just read this statistic last night, and it blew me away. i hate to say it, but it was on some website that is affilated with Oprah. i feel dirty.

anyway, 75% of marriages that end are ended by the woman.

just saying. sounds to me like the women are doing there share of "going through" men.


anyway, men suck, get over it. i thought all you gals were pulled aside at like the age of 13 and told that !?!?!?

Someone may have already said this, I am quoting the first page and all...but I would attribute some of this to men's ability to ignore things that make them unhappy. Women tend to not put up with it or live with it(not all, mind you). The men just go on with their lives, cheating or being unhappy, or just plain living without any regard to their wife until she finally ends it. Doesn't mean it's the women discarding the men....sometimes the men don't have the balls to end it when they want to.

yahamita

Lizardjam wrote:

Someone may have already said this, I am quoting the first page and all...but I would attribute some of this to men's ability to ignore things that make them unhappy. Women tend to not put up with it or live with it(not all, mind you). The men just go on with their lives, cheating or being unhappy, or just plain living without any regard to their wife until she finally ends it. Doesn't mean it's the women discarding the men....sometimes the men don't have the balls to end it when they want to.

Very well said, my thoughts exactly! Has anyone on here divorced over a cheating bf/spouse who couldn't stay off of those dating sites? don't they realize people post their BEST pic they have of themselves for you to fantasize over, you build this image/person up in your head, and once you meet them, they are never their pic! If you are lucky, you could get 20 dates off of the site, but reality is, you will spend alot of time and money weeding them out. They are just a picture on a page! One out of the 20 just might be a connection. Then you have to start all over again, searching, looking, hoping you will find the right one on a different site...CRAZY!

Heineken Helen

yahamita wrote:

Thanks Helen! All of my friends are guys except for 3..Its easier that way. I see how my guy friends treat their women, and I do know there are decent ones out there, but yes, I am venting at the moment.

well then vent! Every man who has ever lived anywhere has been a piece of shit

I know when you're going through shit like this that you don't REALLY wanna hear how there ARE actually good men everywhere... you just wanna grab him by the balls and twist... slowly!

Hmm... drink brings out the evil in me

yahamita

Heineken Helen wrote:

well then vent! Every man who has ever lived anywhere has been a piece of shit

I know when you're going through shit like this that you don't REALLY wanna hear how there ARE actually good men everywhere... you just wanna grab him by the balls and twist... slowly!

Hmm... drink brings out the evil in me

Just had a few myself. Now the asshole is texting me telling me how much he loves and misses me..I need to go smoke a bowl..Life as a grownup sucks!

writersu

chadwick wrote:

and i thought i was the only nutty one in the group
nope i am not
our Jeanie here was all up in this badass waterfall that i always climb around on
she was not afraid to get wet
Rock dude was all taking pictures like a madman
Chadwick with a gallon of water in his left boot
slippery mossy rock
me all stepping into a deep hole for my left leg to swim in
funny shit i'll never forget
me sitting on a log, dumping water out of boot
ringing out my sock
and Jeanie like a chipmunk scurrying from rock to rock
big tall waterfall crashing sounds
good fucking times

what are you in a "Survivor" series I know nothing of?