Racial Slurrs .

angelica

josevolution wrote:

that is totally what i will try to do and he really is a beautyfull young man but that is how i see it he is my son and i know he is not an angel but i do know he would never call anybody racial slurrs...

Just from the way you say you never use racial slurs, and that your son would never do it, it's pretty clear you will all get past this and continue to rise above it. You sound like a wonderful, caring father and your son sounds like a good young man. Best of luck with the situation, friend.

RavennaSeattle1911

im sorry to hear he was called names -it can led to bad stuff for both sides

all parties should probably be called to some seminar or discussion group as soon as posible and find out why the kid said it

i think things in usa will just get worse racially -maybe not

lalalalaaaaaaaa

josevolution wrote:

i need some input on this people and please i need parents input ,my 13 yr old son today was called a few racial slurrs in school today. i'm spanish my wife american that makes him 1/2 chilean and he was born here he's in 6th grade, the names he was called were mexican nigger & spic and he reacted and 1 thing led to another he had to fight 1 of the kids and in turn got inschool suspension ,i'm livid this the second time he has complained to me about this kind of problem my ? what steps to take at this time if any, i did talk to the assistant principle today and i should say that the other kid who he fought with did get the same kind of inschool suspension .but not the kid who actually called him names since he wasn't the kid my son hit .........

I don't think anyone HAS to fight, but at his age, I don't think it's necessary to go over why violence doesn't solve problems and all that.

I guess I would just teach him how to deal with the racism as you do. It's always gonna be out there in some form. It doesn't mean we need to accept it and tolerate it, but we also don't have to let it bother us so much that we have to fight. There should be a process for him to report it to a teacher at school, and if there isn't, that might be something you could push for.

ThumbingMyWay32

RavennaSeattle1911 wrote:

i think things in usa will just get worse racially -maybe not

As oppossed to what? The '60s?

I believe the country has come a very, very, very long way racially.

tara

josevolution wrote:

i need some input on this people and please i need parents input ,my 13 yr old son today was called a few racial slurrs in school today. i'm spanish my wife american that makes him 1/2 chilean and he was born here he's in 6th grade, the names he was called were mexican nigger & spic and he reacted and 1 thing led to another he had to fight 1 of the kids and in turn got inschool suspension ,i'm livid this the second time he has complained to me about this kind of problem my ? what steps to take at this time if any, i did talk to the assistant principle today and i should say that the other kid who he fought with did get the same kind of inschool suspension .but not the kid who actually called him names since he wasn't the kid my son hit .........

i didn't read through the whole thread, so maybe this has been said, but by fighting, he's going to help create a sterotype, then the kids'll start saying stuff like, well you know how they are, he's just hot tempered, and gets into fights etc
i think that the kid that called your kid names definetly should be punished.
once upon a time my mom got a call at work, she was a teacher, it was lunchtime, she was in the break room with the other teachers, so they transfer the call to the break room, my mom's away in a corner on the phone, and finds out that my bro got a suspension (he was in gr 6), my mom walks back to the other teachers, all upset, and the other teachers say 'is everything ok, what happened?' my mom says "my son just got suspended' (which she was very embarassed about), the other teachers say 'why' my mom says 'he called someone an asshole' the other teachers laugh and say "well, was he an asshole?' (at that school my mom was told to fuck off, and had a kid pee out the window onto the superintendent b/c my mom told him that he would have to wait to go to the bathroom). my point is that although fighting isn't great, your kid wasn't wrong, he got backed into a corner and reacted, something seriously needs to be done about that racist kid, because that ain't right. my question is where he learned those words

josevolution

angelica wrote:

Just from the way you say you never use racial slurs, and that your son would never do it, it's pretty clear you will all get past this and continue to rise above it. You sound like a wonderful, caring father and your son sounds like a good young man. Best of luck with the situation, friend.

thanks for the kind words it really does make me feel better, i just wan't to be humble all the time i treat everyone the same and that is what i'm trying to instill in my children ........:)

josevolution

Saturnal wrote:

I don't think anyone HAS to fight, but at his age, I don't think it's necessary to go over why violence doesn't solve problems and all that.

I guess I would just teach him how to deal with the racism as you do. It's always gonna be out there in some form. It doesn't mean we need to accept it and tolerate it, but we also don't have to let it bother us so much that we have to fight. There should be a process for him to report it to a teacher at school, and if there isn't, that might be something you could push for.

i did just that i told him if this happens again to just walk away and head straight to the principle's office and have him call me immediatly and that is what i will convey to the asst principle .........

ThumbingMyWay32

Teachers used to do the same thing to me. The human intestines are something like 10 miles long. Yet I was always expected to be ready to use the bathroom promptly after eating lunch. Now maybe my grandfather can it, but me, I believe it to be virtually impossible.

Of course, knowing when someone has to use the bathroom and when they don't is a lot like reading minds. But reguardless, it really got under my skin!

josevolution

ThumbingMyWay32 wrote:

Teachers used to do the same thing to me. The human intestines are something like 10 miles long. Yet I was always expected to be ready to use the bathroom promptly after eating lunch. Now maybe my grandfather can it, but me, I believe it to be virtually impossible.

Of course, knowing when someone has to use the bathroom and when they don't is a lot like reading minds. But reguardless, it really got under my skin!

you kind of lost me on this ???

ThumbingMyWay32

josevolution wrote:

you kind of lost me on this ???

lol Sorry. I was responding to tara's story.

josevolution

ThumbingMyWay32 wrote:

lol Sorry. I was responding to tara's story.

i figured it did bring a smile to my face ha ha ha thanks...

CJMST3K

perhaps ask the school what their policy is on punishing people who use racial slurs against another student.

If they say "there is no policy", then I would tell them "then I will MAKE a policy for my son to protect himself, until YOU do".

Ahnimus

I personally think you should teach your son to ignore them. That doesn't just mean ignoring the slurs, but just ignore them all together. Don't make eye-contact, don't give them the time of day. Walk around them in the hallway at school, just don't even acknowledge the other kid. The kid is doing it to get a reaction, if he gets that reaction, he's going to keep doing it.

This applies to adults as well. Sometimes I forget that. It's unfortunate that kids pick up this habit of using racial slurs or other verbal attacks to get reactions out of people, and then you see it again as an adult. It's quite common on message boards like this one.

josevolution

CJMST3K wrote:

perhaps ask the school what their policy is on punishing people who use racial slurs against another student.

If they say "there is no policy", then I would tell them "then I will MAKE a policy for my son to protect himself, until YOU do".

good point i will bring that up on friday ........

josevolution

Ahnimus wrote:

I personally think you should teach your son to ignore them. That doesn't just mean ignoring the slurs, but just ignore them all together. Don't make eye-contact, don't give them the time of day. Walk around them in the hallway at school, just don't even acknowledge the other kid. The kid is doing it to get a reaction, if he gets that reaction, he's going to keep doing it.

This applies to adults as well. Sometimes I forget that. It's unfortunate that kids pick up this habit of using racial slurs or other verbal attacks to get reactions out of people, and then you see it again as an adult. It's quite common on message boards like this one.

i've been waitng for you to respond thanks and i did tell him just that no eye contact avoid them and if they pursue him to just head to his counselors office and have them call me immediatly .........

ThumbingMyWay32

CJMST3K wrote:

perhaps ask the school what their policy is on punishing people who use racial slurs against another student.

If they say "there is no policy", then I would tell them "then I will MAKE a policy for my son to protect himself, until YOU do".

That's beautiful.

Ahnimus

josevolution wrote:

i've been waitng for you to respond thanks and i did tell him just that no eye contact avoid them and if they pursue him to just head to his counselors office and have them call me immediatly .........

Cool, I would have responded earlier, but I was banned. :(

I had an ebook before on "The art of fighting without fighting" it was on how to avoid the escalation of confrontations. It was a pretty good read, it lead into some Aikido techniques as well. Sorry, I don't have it anymore though. :(

twisztad

I think the best thing to do is for your son just to try and avoid the kids, if that fails threaten to sue that seems to always work and it will get the principle to take action.

And I think Matias is a fucking cool name.

evenkat

josevolution wrote:

he did say that he believes it will happen again and if you saw him he looks totally american no sing of spanish except his name noW im hating my self for giving him the name wich i find to be beautifull , MATIAS .....

Don't hate yourself because you did nothing wrong. The kids calling your son names are the ones who are wrong. Be strong for your son because he must be hurting.

Just keep complaining to the school until something is done.

know1

josevolution wrote:

he did say that he believes it will happen again and if you saw him he looks totally american no sing of spanish except his name noW im hating my self for giving him the name wich i find to be beautifull , MATIAS .....

What does it mean to look totally American?