if a child knows why he/she is being spanked then i see no problem with it. it is not about violence...it's about consequences for actions. some children respond to verbals, some do not. you have to know your child.
agreed.
i was hit maybe? 3 times as a child. i am not scarred from it. my older sisters were hit even more...they too, fine, unscarred...know my parents loved them. it's all how and why it's done...and yes, so individual. some parents hit out of frustration...others for good reason. unless a parent is truly abusive, i do not feel it is my place to say...nor to judge...whatever tactic they choose to discipline their children. given we have become a much more permissive society with children in general, i don't see that it has created any true positives...so yea...i leasve it to a parent's discretion. as i am not a parent, i don't have to worry about. back when i taught, it was an important issue as we were trained to recognize signs of abuse and legally responsible to report any...and luckily i never had any of those issues.
Where did I say there were no consequences? I hold my children accountable, and always have. I don't think they'd want it any other way. It's a psychological fact that when we discover something works for us with problem solving, we keep doing it. It usually takes some pretty serious fallout for us to decide to change our patterns. It's not surprising to me is those who believe in hitting cannot imagine more effective or more humane, respectful childrearing solutions and consequences.
The fact remains, when we teach our children to submit to authority, we teach them to submit to authority. When we teach them how to have freedom of speech out loud, and in their heads, and that by having that freedom they can trust themselves and life, and that they will find within themselves the ability make potent, life-affirming decisions in their best interest, that also is what it is. If you don't see how one governs a family, then I'll just let that go.
Said perfectly. There's no way of getting around the fact that hitting a child is resorting to physical violence to solve conflicts. It's saying 'If you don't mind us, you will be spanked.' So the child is taught if I don't want to suffer the feeling of being spanked then I better mind mommy or daddy. It is all about fear or else children wouldn't care if they got spanked or not. It's all about submitting to the authority of the parent for fear of pain. It teaches the child nothing of understanding why their action was wrong and what harm comes from them committing the act. It's about the easiest, less stressful way out for the parent. Children are smart and can be reasoned with unless they are too young...in that case they need constant adult supervision.
If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
between a spanking and a beating. common sense dictates the distance. we don't need more legislation to teach common sense. there are plenty of laws on the books that prohibit parents from abusing their children that a no spank law would probably be unnecessary. the assembly person in question was probably just trying to get press, because a blanket no spank law would never pass.
Said perfectly. There's no way of getting around the fact that hitting a child is resorting to physical violence to solve conflicts. It's saying 'If you don't mind us, you will be spanked.' So the child is taught if I don't want to suffer the feeling of being spanked then I better mind mommy or daddy. It is all about fear or else children wouldn't care if they got spanked or not. It's all about submitting to the authority of the parent for fear of pain. It teaches the child nothing of understanding why their action was wrong and what harm comes from them committing the act. It's about the easiest, less stressful way out for the parent. Children are smart and can be reasoned with unless they are too young...in that case they need constant adult supervision.
I agree, but I have to say I was hit as a kid, in the face. But when my parents did it, they said why I was being punished, they told me what I did wrong and made me promise not to do it again. I felt that they really didn't want to hit me but it was for my own good.
To be honest, I was more afraid that they'd take away my favourite toy, or would make me go to bed early...
I still think hitting or spanking your child is wrong. If it happens on a rare occasion, when the child does something very dangerous, like hippiemom's example, I do think it adds much more force and the child will understand he did something very wrong and he won't do it again. But when you spank a kid often it either loses its power or it fill the kid with fear, imo.
I agree, but I have to say I was hit as a kid, in the face. But when my parents did it, they said why I was being punished, they told me what I did wrong and made me promise not to do it again. I felt that they really didn't want to hit me but it was for my own good.
To be honest, I was more afraid that they'd take away my favourite toy, or would make me go to bed early...
I still think hitting or spanking your child is wrong. If it happens on a rare occasion, when the child does something very dangerous, like hippiemom's example, I do think it adds much more force and the child will understand he did something very wrong and he won't do it again. But when you spank a kid often it either loses its power or it fill the kid with fear, imo.
as stated above, i really think it depends on the child. i think aparent needs to decide what works. spanking/hitting is not something that should be done regularly...but i see so many parents with children running around restaurants, going wild in stores, etc...and then try talking them into behaving, and it just isn't working for them. it is a last resort, but sometimes, i think a parent may need to consider it. children do need to follow the authority of their parents while small....and honestly, as long as they live at home. hopefully as a child ages, the more and more dialogue works between parent and child, the more things get discussed....and thus it is entirely unnecessary. as someone mentioned earlier...'the look' was enough to let you know, enough. fall in line now. being your own person, growing up to be independent...still can happen, quite easily really.
i will say, i have 3 nephews. the oldest, from ym sister's first husband...the best behaved. he was smacked on occasion. rarely, but on occasion. as he got older, it happened less and less. he was a willfull child, and most things got talked about.....but if he truly went over the line, it happened. my second nephew, from her second husband...free reign...never slapped.....and he was a terror. they talked and talked, took away privileges, etc....nothing worked. it was horrific. not saying a spanking would 'solve' problems...but sometimes i think, hmmmm....
bottomline, it's a tough call, and an individual call. everyone has to decide for themselves what is appropriate, what works....and when we are talking just a splap/spank....not being abusive, i think society as a whole has to back off and respect others' choices on what is right within their family. like most things, it's all about finding the proper balance.
It's apparent by any time a kid hurts himself, he will only cry if he knows you are giving your sympathy to him. If you don't make a big deal out of it, neither will he. Kids don't learn best from physical pain, they learn best from emotional pain. If you isolate them they will want to get back on your good side. You don't have to hit them at all to get that effect. Unless you are a horrible parent and never give your children positive stimulation. Raise your child through supression and reinforcement. Reinforce behavior with praise and suppress behavior with discontent. You don't have to yell, you don't have to hit, as long as you provide both positive and negative stimulation.
This is just my personal opinion. But I think parents try to hard to stop their kids from doing wrong, and don't try hard enough to encourage their kids to do right. It's an imbalance, the child learns suppression/negative stimulus only and fails to react appropriately to any stimulus. A child will not miss the positive stimulus if it's not frequent enough to stick in his mind. Love is a chemical dependency, if you allow that dependency to foster through positive interaction, then the chemical withdrawl will be punishment enough. Even more unbearable for a child then the physical pain associated with a spanking. But it takes balance and it won't be easy to do.
I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
This is just my personal opinion. But I think parents try to hard to stop their kids from doing wrong, and don't try hard enough to encourage their kids to do right. It's an imbalance, the child learns suppression/negative stimulus only and fails to react appropriately to any stimulus. A child will not miss the positive stimulus if it's not frequent enough to stick in his mind.
This is a really good point, Ahnimus. I notice that a lot of people don't seem to respond to the positive. They are overly mindful of the negative. And from your point, it makes sense now. I'm kinda surprised I've overlooked that cause/effect until now. It's an especially good point for a spanking thread.
"The opposite of a fact is falsehood, but the opposite of one profound truth may very well be another profound truth." ~ Niels Bohr
This is a really good point, Ahnimus. I notice that a lot of people don't seem to respond to the positive. They are overly mindful of the negative. And from your point, it makes sense now. I'm kinda surprised I've overlooked that cause/effect until now. It's an especially good point for a spanking thread.
Thanks
My guess is this other child saying the slurs has some problems with home. Poor parenting it sounds like, too much negative attention. Perhaps his father is bigoted and that's where he's learned it from. Can't really blame the kid though. Kids are kids.
I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
My guess is this other child saying the slurs has some problems with home. Poor parenting it sounds like, too much negative attention. Perhaps his father is bigoted and that's where he's learned it from. Can't really blame the kid though. Kids are kids.
Wrong thread I guess eh, lol.
I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
I necessarily have the passion for writing this, and you have the passion for condemning me; both of us are equally fools, equally the toys of destiny. Your nature is to do harm, mine is to love truth, and to make it public in spite of you. - Voltaire
ok, i have no attention span right now, so i didn't get through all 4 pages of this, but you can always count on me to give my opinion so here it is
i was spanked once as a kid, and for damn good reason, i was about 5, my bro 6, some kid said that there was some lady who gave them cookies, we all went over there, i didn't even go in, but my dad spanked me (not hard) to let me know that i shouldn't go over to strangers houses.
now when i was a teenager my dad slapped the living shit out of me, on at least a weekly basis, if not more, chased me around the house, etc, etc. now that seriously fucked me up (i moved out about a year ago, and it took me about 9 months for my nerves to calm, and to stop jumping at every noise). my mom did too, she's 5'3, i'm 5'10 and pretty athletic, i could kick the shit out of her in a fair fight, but i had to stand there and let her slap me etc, my point is that it's also a mind fuck 'i control you, you can't do shit without me, so you're going to be the person that i tell you to be (or whatever the arguement is about), and take my slap and whatever else i dish out'. i don't know when they decided that hitting my face was ok. i don't remember the time that i decided to fight back either. so yeah, i'm against that
alright, i've been sitting here for 10 minutes deciding whether to post this because i can never tell how things will be taken in writting
No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it.
Albert Einstein
I know that there is. But when I watch kids at my bud's houses go out of control all weekend long. And I am getting sick of hearing, "stop that". There has to be another way and I agree that it may not be spanking. But then again, it could be.
hate to say it, but maybe it's the parenting. i'm not a parent, so maybe i don't know, but i've worked with kids since i was 13, and think that i may have some insight so here goes, kids are acting out because they want attention, plain and simple, and the parent shouldn't react by yelling at the kid to stop it, maybe they could explain to the kid why what they're doing is wrong, or play with the kid, show them that you love them, and wear them out so they'll calm down at the same time
No problem can be solved from the same consciousness that created it.
Albert Einstein
ok, i have no attention span right now, so i didn't get through all 4 pages of this, but you can always count on me to give my opinion so here it is
i was spanked once as a kid, and for damn good reason, i was about 5, my bro 6, some kid said that there was some lady who gave them cookies, we all went over there, i didn't even go in, but my dad spanked me (not hard) to let me know that i shouldn't go over to strangers houses.
now when i was a teenager my dad slapped the living shit out of me, on at least a weekly basis, if not more, chased me around the house, etc, etc. now that seriously fucked me up (i moved out about a year ago, and it took me about 9 months for my nerves to calm, and to stop jumping at every noise). my mom did too, she's 5'3, i'm 5'10 and pretty athletic, i could kick the shit out of her in a fair fight, but i had to stand there and let her slap me etc, my point is that it's also a mind fuck 'i control you, you can't do shit without me, so you're going to be the person that i tell you to be (or whatever the arguement is about), and take my slap and whatever else i dish out'. i don't know when they decided that hitting my face was ok. i don't remember the time that i decided to fight back either. so yeah, i'm against that
alright, i've been sitting here for 10 minutes deciding whether to post this because i can never tell how things will be taken in writting
You defined abuse. Not spanking.
"Sarcasm: intellect on the offensive"
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
i would say, depends on the kid and the circumstance... but i am definitely for spanking kids if they misbehave badly, especially if they are acting out in public. the spanking should not take place there, but kids need to learn to behave themselves in public and respect other people. personally, i find misbehaving/ crying/ whining kids at a restaurant more offensive than any amount of cigarette smoke. people with children who can't behave should have their own glassed-in section where they have to live in all the noise pollution they've created.
ok sorry i got on a tangent there. but you get my point. it's cool to spank if it works as discipline. it's also cool not to spank. whatever works.
it depends on the child, situation, etc im the eldest of a huge family, so ive seen plenty of kids grow up, smacked and not smacked.
i was hit as a kid. i think its just an adult temper tantrum. they cant deal with the situation so they whack the kid out of frustration, which probably makes the kid more angry and wound up, causing more prob for the parent.
I can understand the warning smack for young children doing silly things (going near a fire, running out in the road) because they remember the pain, but physically removing them from the situation quite briskly and with words would prob have same effect without the child developing an unhealthy fear of the parent.
For a tantruming child,Chuck em in a cold shower, shocks em, but you yourself arent hurting them. i try to ignore it and keep calm.
Also, i can agree with the people who see parents unable to control their children getting extremely frustrated and wishing they would smack the child. been there. I have seen a punishment that consisted of the child eating a ham sandwich and drinking a glass of milk.9this was after they spat and hit at their elder cousins) wtf? the same parents do that "reasoning" with a two year old thing..please. just walk away if its safe to do so, the one fear we are born with is that of being abandoned, the rest we learn.
the person who said we need to praise and enourage more than hit and curse makes me think its a good idea.
anyone watch supernanny? she gets a child behaving without hitting them...
i think its just an adult temper tantrum. they cant deal with the situation so they whack the kid out of frustration, which probably makes the kid more angry and wound up, causing more prob for the parent.
I agree. I have yet to see a calm and rational parent hit their child. I've seen children hit over and over in my life, and the parent was always upset and out of control.
anyone watch supernanny? she gets a child behaving without hitting them...
Again, I agree. It goes to show that children can be effectively taught without hitting. However when we give ourselves permission to hit, we stunt our own growth and our learning to find healthy and effective ways to discipline. It's those who believe in hitting that can't seem to imagine better ways.
"The opposite of a fact is falsehood, but the opposite of one profound truth may very well be another profound truth." ~ Niels Bohr
I agree. I have yet to see a calm and rational parent hit their child. I've seen children hit over and over in my life, and the parent was always upset and out of control.
Yes, its as if the parent has become a toddler and having a tantrum too.
R.i.p. Rigoberto Alpizar.
R.i.p. My Dad - May 28, 2007
R.i.p. Black Tail (cat) - Sept. 20, 2008
The issue isn't spanking. The issue is for parents to be clear and consistent. They need to set boundaries that are understandable for their children and enforce those boundaries consistently without exception.
Then, whether you spank or whatever, you only have to do it one or two times.
It's when the boundaries aren't understood that discipline is lost.
The only people we should try to get even with...
...are those who've helped us.
Right 'round the corner could be bigger than ourselves.
The issue isn't spanking. The issue is for parents to be clear and consistent. They need to set boundaries that are understandable for their children and enforce those boundaries consistently without exception.
Then, whether you spank or whatever, you only have to do it one or two times.
It's when the boundaries aren't understood that discipline is lost.
I agree that this is very much a key issue: firm boundaries and consistency. When we as parents understand how to effectively implement boundaries and are consistent, we have the basics down. If we understand our own child's development including what they are and are not capable at that age and create healthy boundaries that are enforced with consistency, we don't need to have adult temper tantrums displaying our own low frustration tolerance. Instead we'll have a healthy plan for teaching our children, based on understanding.
"The opposite of a fact is falsehood, but the opposite of one profound truth may very well be another profound truth." ~ Niels Bohr
Absolutely not. To the contrary I think she's one of the most reasonable people on the board. BUT you are using the present tense. When she smacked her kid (past tense) I do think she was being unreasonable. And if you notice, it sounds like it was a very rare event, indeed. Everyone has their moments.
You are correct. Not every kid who is spanked is going to become a sociopath. But every kid who is spanked will learn to fear the person who hit them. And every kid who is hit will see that authority figure validate hitting as a solution to a problem. I don't need my children to fear me.
i love sweeping generalizations based on isolated experience.
i love sweeping generalizations based on isolated experience.
That's what keeps this message board chugging along. And you're right, my experiences are definitely isolated to what I've experienced in my current life. I unfortunately don't have any recollection or knowlege of events in any past lives.
"I'll use the magic word - let's just shut the fuck up, please." EV, 04/13/08
That's what keeps this message board chugging along. And you're right, my experiences are definitely isolated to what I've experienced in my current life. I unfortunately don't have any recollection or knowlege of events in any past lives.
sometimes it's good to realize, our personal experience and perception, very different from others. doesn't make one better or worse, just different. i know i oftentimes fail at it, but i do try to keep that perspective...especially to avoid judging other's behaviors/choices. as long as we are not talking 'extrmes'...abuse...real harm, etc...i do prefer allowing the freedom, even from judgement, for others to live as they choose.
Comments
Spanking ain't no thang. I'm not talking about putting bruises on kids, for those cynical. It's more of a fear thing.
agreed.
i was hit maybe? 3 times as a child. i am not scarred from it. my older sisters were hit even more...they too, fine, unscarred...know my parents loved them. it's all how and why it's done...and yes, so individual. some parents hit out of frustration...others for good reason. unless a parent is truly abusive, i do not feel it is my place to say...nor to judge...whatever tactic they choose to discipline their children. given we have become a much more permissive society with children in general, i don't see that it has created any true positives...so yea...i leasve it to a parent's discretion. as i am not a parent, i don't have to worry about. back when i taught, it was an important issue as we were trained to recognize signs of abuse and legally responsible to report any...and luckily i never had any of those issues.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
Said perfectly. There's no way of getting around the fact that hitting a child is resorting to physical violence to solve conflicts. It's saying 'If you don't mind us, you will be spanked.' So the child is taught if I don't want to suffer the feeling of being spanked then I better mind mommy or daddy. It is all about fear or else children wouldn't care if they got spanked or not. It's all about submitting to the authority of the parent for fear of pain. It teaches the child nothing of understanding why their action was wrong and what harm comes from them committing the act. It's about the easiest, less stressful way out for the parent. Children are smart and can be reasoned with unless they are too young...in that case they need constant adult supervision.
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
-Oscar Wilde
masturbation threads are always deleted.
http://forums.pearljam.com/showthread.php?t=272825
I agree, but I have to say I was hit as a kid, in the face. But when my parents did it, they said why I was being punished, they told me what I did wrong and made me promise not to do it again. I felt that they really didn't want to hit me but it was for my own good.
To be honest, I was more afraid that they'd take away my favourite toy, or would make me go to bed early...
I still think hitting or spanking your child is wrong. If it happens on a rare occasion, when the child does something very dangerous, like hippiemom's example, I do think it adds much more force and the child will understand he did something very wrong and he won't do it again. But when you spank a kid often it either loses its power or it fill the kid with fear, imo.
naděje umírá poslední
as stated above, i really think it depends on the child. i think aparent needs to decide what works. spanking/hitting is not something that should be done regularly...but i see so many parents with children running around restaurants, going wild in stores, etc...and then try talking them into behaving, and it just isn't working for them. it is a last resort, but sometimes, i think a parent may need to consider it. children do need to follow the authority of their parents while small....and honestly, as long as they live at home. hopefully as a child ages, the more and more dialogue works between parent and child, the more things get discussed....and thus it is entirely unnecessary. as someone mentioned earlier...'the look' was enough to let you know, enough. fall in line now. being your own person, growing up to be independent...still can happen, quite easily really.
i will say, i have 3 nephews. the oldest, from ym sister's first husband...the best behaved. he was smacked on occasion. rarely, but on occasion. as he got older, it happened less and less. he was a willfull child, and most things got talked about.....but if he truly went over the line, it happened. my second nephew, from her second husband...free reign...never slapped.....and he was a terror. they talked and talked, took away privileges, etc....nothing worked. it was horrific. not saying a spanking would 'solve' problems...but sometimes i think, hmmmm....
bottomline, it's a tough call, and an individual call. everyone has to decide for themselves what is appropriate, what works....and when we are talking just a splap/spank....not being abusive, i think society as a whole has to back off and respect others' choices on what is right within their family. like most things, it's all about finding the proper balance.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
It's apparent by any time a kid hurts himself, he will only cry if he knows you are giving your sympathy to him. If you don't make a big deal out of it, neither will he. Kids don't learn best from physical pain, they learn best from emotional pain. If you isolate them they will want to get back on your good side. You don't have to hit them at all to get that effect. Unless you are a horrible parent and never give your children positive stimulation. Raise your child through supression and reinforcement. Reinforce behavior with praise and suppress behavior with discontent. You don't have to yell, you don't have to hit, as long as you provide both positive and negative stimulation.
This is just my personal opinion. But I think parents try to hard to stop their kids from doing wrong, and don't try hard enough to encourage their kids to do right. It's an imbalance, the child learns suppression/negative stimulus only and fails to react appropriately to any stimulus. A child will not miss the positive stimulus if it's not frequent enough to stick in his mind. Love is a chemical dependency, if you allow that dependency to foster through positive interaction, then the chemical withdrawl will be punishment enough. Even more unbearable for a child then the physical pain associated with a spanking. But it takes balance and it won't be easy to do.
http://www.myspace.com/illuminatta
Rhinocerous Surprise '08!!!
Thanks
My guess is this other child saying the slurs has some problems with home. Poor parenting it sounds like, too much negative attention. Perhaps his father is bigoted and that's where he's learned it from. Can't really blame the kid though. Kids are kids.
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
Wrong thread I guess eh, lol.
http://www.myspace.com/illuminatta
Rhinocerous Surprise '08!!!
lol Was hoping you would come back to that.
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
Hah, I haven't slept for like 3 days.
i was spanked once as a kid, and for damn good reason, i was about 5, my bro 6, some kid said that there was some lady who gave them cookies, we all went over there, i didn't even go in, but my dad spanked me (not hard) to let me know that i shouldn't go over to strangers houses.
now when i was a teenager my dad slapped the living shit out of me, on at least a weekly basis, if not more, chased me around the house, etc, etc. now that seriously fucked me up (i moved out about a year ago, and it took me about 9 months for my nerves to calm, and to stop jumping at every noise). my mom did too, she's 5'3, i'm 5'10 and pretty athletic, i could kick the shit out of her in a fair fight, but i had to stand there and let her slap me etc, my point is that it's also a mind fuck 'i control you, you can't do shit without me, so you're going to be the person that i tell you to be (or whatever the arguement is about), and take my slap and whatever else i dish out'. i don't know when they decided that hitting my face was ok. i don't remember the time that i decided to fight back either. so yeah, i'm against that
alright, i've been sitting here for 10 minutes deciding whether to post this because i can never tell how things will be taken in writting
Albert Einstein
hate to say it, but maybe it's the parenting. i'm not a parent, so maybe i don't know, but i've worked with kids since i was 13, and think that i may have some insight so here goes, kids are acting out because they want attention, plain and simple, and the parent shouldn't react by yelling at the kid to stop it, maybe they could explain to the kid why what they're doing is wrong, or play with the kid, show them that you love them, and wear them out so they'll calm down at the same time
Albert Einstein
You defined abuse. Not spanking.
"What I lack in decorum, I make up for with an absence of tact."
Camden 5-28-06
Washington, D.C. 6-22-08
yeah, see, that's why i didn't want to post it, i knew someone would say that, but it wasn't abuse
Albert Einstein
ok sorry i got on a tangent there. but you get my point. it's cool to spank if it works as discipline. it's also cool not to spank. whatever works.
i was hit as a kid. i think its just an adult temper tantrum. they cant deal with the situation so they whack the kid out of frustration, which probably makes the kid more angry and wound up, causing more prob for the parent.
I can understand the warning smack for young children doing silly things (going near a fire, running out in the road) because they remember the pain, but physically removing them from the situation quite briskly and with words would prob have same effect without the child developing an unhealthy fear of the parent.
For a tantruming child,Chuck em in a cold shower, shocks em, but you yourself arent hurting them. i try to ignore it and keep calm.
Also, i can agree with the people who see parents unable to control their children getting extremely frustrated and wishing they would smack the child. been there. I have seen a punishment that consisted of the child eating a ham sandwich and drinking a glass of milk.9this was after they spat and hit at their elder cousins) wtf? the same parents do that "reasoning" with a two year old thing..please. just walk away if its safe to do so, the one fear we are born with is that of being abandoned, the rest we learn.
the person who said we need to praise and enourage more than hit and curse makes me think its a good idea.
anyone watch supernanny? she gets a child behaving without hitting them...
Again, I agree. It goes to show that children can be effectively taught without hitting. However when we give ourselves permission to hit, we stunt our own growth and our learning to find healthy and effective ways to discipline. It's those who believe in hitting that can't seem to imagine better ways.
http://www.myspace.com/illuminatta
Rhinocerous Surprise '08!!!
Yes, its as if the parent has become a toddler and having a tantrum too.
R.i.p. My Dad - May 28, 2007
R.i.p. Black Tail (cat) - Sept. 20, 2008
Then, whether you spank or whatever, you only have to do it one or two times.
It's when the boundaries aren't understood that discipline is lost.
...are those who've helped us.
Right 'round the corner could be bigger than ourselves.
http://www.myspace.com/illuminatta
Rhinocerous Surprise '08!!!
i love sweeping generalizations based on isolated experience.
from my window to yours
That's what keeps this message board chugging along. And you're right, my experiences are definitely isolated to what I've experienced in my current life. I unfortunately don't have any recollection or knowlege of events in any past lives.
sometimes it's good to realize, our personal experience and perception, very different from others. doesn't make one better or worse, just different. i know i oftentimes fail at it, but i do try to keep that perspective...especially to avoid judging other's behaviors/choices. as long as we are not talking 'extrmes'...abuse...real harm, etc...i do prefer allowing the freedom, even from judgement, for others to live as they choose.
Let's just breathe...
I am myself like you somehow
http://www.myspace.com/illuminatta
Rhinocerous Surprise '08!!!