Mock a musician in First Person POV

2

Comments

  • DOSWDOSW Posts: 2,014
    Hello, my name's MC Hammer, I'll be your server this evening. Can I start you with something to drink?
    It's a town full of losers and I'm pulling out of here to win
  • Hi, im Dave A. You may have heard of me in this band Pearl.. ah, whatever.

    Anyway, this is our newest Camry, the 2009 model.... (continues sales pitch)
    2004 - 10/1, 10/11
    2005 - 9/15, 9/16, 9/30, 10/1, 10/3
    2006 - 5/5, 5/12, 5/13, 5/27, 5/28, 5/30, 6/1, 6/3, 6/23, 7/22, 7/23, 12/2
    2007 - 6/27, 8/3
    2008 - 6/14, 6/19, 6/20, 6/22, 6/24, 6/25, 6/27, 6/28, 6/30, 7/1
  • dunkmandunkman Posts: 19,646
    Hi i'm Britney Spears and i'm a bald bi-polar ex-singer

    no you're not.

    uh, yes... actually i am.

    prove it baldy

    no, you prove I isnt.

    no you prove it you fat hobo sniffer or i'll burn your house down

    what.. like that girl from TLC tried to do?

    yeah just like that

    isnt she like dead now or something

    i dont know... what am i .. E! News?

    bitch

    Aguilera

    *strikes match*

    I think we need help.
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • dunkmandunkman Posts: 19,646
    Hi i'm miley cyrus

    in 4 years i'll either be pregnant or a junkie

    thanks
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • dunkmandunkman Posts: 19,646
    see yo pussy ass fools!!!

    i oughtta wipe out all your asses and send you back to yo mammas looking like li'l kids crying about their lunch getting messed the fuck up. You mofo's need to be respectin the fuck outta me and my boyz... we smoke all yo asses and make you chumps seem like whiteys plain hoops n shit. But if y'all muthers can be cool wit me then I'll reciprocate that love and respect back to y'all

    peace out
    Tony Bennett
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • dunkmandunkman Posts: 19,646
    Hi I'm Marc Almond... anyone up for a nice thick creamy milkshake?
    oh scary... 40000 morbidly obese christians wearing fanny packs invading europe is probably the least scariest thing since I watched an edited version of The Care Bears movie in an extremely brightly lit cinema.
  • You mention me in this thread, and I'll fucking sue you for not paying me royalties. Motherfuckers.


    Lars Ulrich™
  • MattyJoeMattyJoe Posts: 1,424
    ^ Ha good one.

    Henry Rollins is off limits? What the fuck does that mean?
    I pledge to you a government that will not only work well, but wisely, its ability to act tempered by prudence, and its willingness to do good, balanced by the knowledge that government is never more dangerous than when our desire to have it help us blinds us to its great power to harm us.
    -Reagan
  • reeferchiefreeferchief Posts: 3,569
    MattyJoe wrote:
    ^ Ha good one.

    Henry Rollins is off limits? What the fuck does that mean?

    A nerve has been touched.
    Can not be arsed with life no more.
  • No, I just look like him. You want fries with that? Coke? Okay. And onions? To eat now? No, honestly, I just look a little like him. Yeah, yeah, might be these lights. Uh huh. That'll be five dollars and forty-eight cents. Thanguverymuch.



    Sales Assistant Evlis Raaon Persley
  • Official Gene Simmons Message Board Post

    $680
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • Gremmie95Gremmie95 Posts: 749
    hey there, I just want to thank you for buying our tickets this time around. Chances are you won't actually see us play, I'll be making my 397th trip to rehab about halfway through the tour. But hey, it's the thought that counts, right?

    Peace and love,

    Scott Weiland
  • eyedclaareyedclaar Posts: 6,980
    Hi! No, that's not the right way to start at all.

    Hey fuckers! Yeah, that's a little better, but still...

    Maybe I should go back to the drawing board for a couple of years and rethink this whole fuckin' thing...

    No, no, changed my mind. I WILL wrap up this email message if it kills me.

    Phew, where was I and where is everyone I used to recognize?

    Focus. People are depending on me and this message that will surely change their lives...

    But, I do have to word this just right; can't be too sure about anything...

    Fuck it, there's always next year.

    Yours truly,

    Axl
    Idaho's Premier Outdoor Writer

    Please Support My Writing Habit By Purchasing A Book:

    https://www.createspace.com/3437020

    http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000663025696

    http://earthtremors.blogspot.com/
  • MrMerkinballMrMerkinball Posts: 1,978
    Hello, My name is Thom Yorke,

    On this next song I will bash pots and pans together with screeching sirens in the background. I will also loop finger nails on a chalk board for 4 straight minutes, followed by a chant and a cowbell.

    You won't like it, and it will be hell to listen to, but trust me it is a great song - I think it's the best thing we have ever done.

    Playing a good song with Guitar's and Drums is sooooo 10 years ago

    Remember I am a genius
  • Hey, It's me, Chad Kroeger from Nickelback.

    Here's an original post.
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • Hey, It's me, Chad Kroeger from Nickelback.

    Here's an original post.
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • Hey, It's me, Chad Kroeger from Nickelback.

    Here's an original post.
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • Hey, It's me, Chad Kroeger from Nickelback.

    Here's an original post.
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • 12345AGNST112345AGNST1 Posts: 4,906
    Hey good to see you all in dis wonderful concert right here hows it goin people ive got a great show for u all in dis wonderful place right here tonight in the heart of NEW YORK CITY right here lets get this jammin for the Dave matthews band!!!
    5/28/06, 6/27/08, 10/28/09, 5/18/10, 5/21/10
    8/7/08, 6/9/09
  • I'm Britney Spears.

    I love Red Bull and Cheetos and Marlboros more than I love my kids.

    But I still love them more than I love my panties.

    Feel sorry for me and my "mental disorder."
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • gabersgabers Posts: 2,787
    No Morrissey bashing yet?! I'm actually disappointed!

    Hey y'all I'm Tim McGraw. I'm the most terrible male country artist and the most popular. What irony! I sing with other crappy musicians to form a supernova of crappiness. Oh yeah, and I dessicrated an timeless Ryan Adams song. My next album will be a series of duets with famous crooners of the past and my death will come at the bare hands of Frank Sinatra Jr. and a monkey wrench. I am the Scott Stapp of country music and I'm damn proud of it.
  • Hi, i'm Thom Yorke and i whine more than anyone else on the planet, and my singing voice actually enhances the whininess. Anyway i know everyone loves me because of the lazy eye.
  • mbangel10mbangel10 Posts: 548
    WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! *cough*
    bedebedebedebedebebeda
    AAAAAAAAAAACK

    SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
    *cough* *cough*
    *hack*
    *snort*

    SQUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    detetetetedeetetete ahhhhhhhhhhh.
    *cough*
    *hiccup*
    *spit*

    WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

    Thank you.

    Mike Patton
    Pitt 98, Pitt 00, Cleveland 03, Pitt 03, State College 03, Toledo 04, Toronto 05, Pitt 05, Cleveland 06, Pitt 06 & Chicago 07, Chicago 1&2 09, Philly 2,3,4 09, Cleveland 10, Columbus 10, Alpine Valley 1& 2 11
  • bahahahaha!

    the Mike Patton is genius. Kudos.
    You can't spell "dumb" without DMB
  • reeferchiefreeferchief Posts: 3,569
    MrSmith wrote:
    Hi, i'm Thom Yorke and i whine more than anyone else on the planet, and my singing voice actually enhances the whininess. Anyway i know everyone loves me because of the lazy eye.

    My mam hates that lazy eye and Thom Yorke.
    Can not be arsed with life no more.
  • South of SeattleSouth of Seattle Posts: 10,724
    Hey guys I'm Perry Farrell

    Sometimes the oceans and the trees speak to me

    I could really use a steak right now. But I cannot eat an animal that is free to roam the earth.

    Please enjoy my music festival so we can all hold hands and sing Kumbaya.

    BTW Dave Navarro is dead sexy.
    NERDS!
  • triangleman12triangleman12 Posts: 193
    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!

    Hey it's Chester Bennington from Linkin Park. All our songs sound the same!
  • Everyone's been so encouraging about the album, which has really made me feel like maybe I COULD write my own fuckin' songs for the next one. We'll see.

    Meanwhile, I spoke to Tom Waits the other day. He said that if I'm gonna do another one, I wasn't guttural enough last time and I need to be smoking 4 packs a day if I'm gonna sound as good as him. I think he's trying to smoke me into an early grave.

    Anyway, I don't mind taking advice but he wasn't very nice about it and he called me a thigh-slappin' hobo ho from a dirty Vegas picture show.

    Scarlett Johanson.
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • triple fuckin post
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • double post
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
Sign In or Register to comment.