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Wife sexually assaulted in Barcelona tonight. WE WERE THROWN OUT!

Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
Very crazy situation tonight in Barcelona. I went to get beers for my wife and I before show. We were 2 rows deep. I came back and she was in tears. She was shaking and said she was just sexually assaulted by someone who seemed like they were just passing. Guy felt her up and down pressed his hard penis into her and wouldn’t leave for several long seconds. My wife complained to security and we were thrown out. Said she was drunk. Meanwhile we had one beer in the venue. Everyone accused her of being disorderly simply for reporting an assault. A second guy behind her said she deserved it. When we pointed that out that came and took us away.  Ended up outside bc arena by a bunch of wimpy wannabe cops. Sad. Need help!!!
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    nicknyr15nicknyr15 Posts: 8,005
    Wow that’s awful if all true. 
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    AmyMooreAmyMoore Posts: 140
    Sorry to hear this. Sad that this is still tolerated in 2024. I was threatened with being ejected many times after punching a guy that thought my breasts were his own personal rail in the pit or poking me with his hard dick. Unfortunately, complaining about it makes you the problem. 
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    pjl44pjl44 Posts: 8,643
    That's awful. I don't know how things work over there but if I was in the US I'd say hopefully you gathered as many names and pictures as possible, get to a police station immediately, and when you get yourself together look for a lawyer.
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    Gern BlanstenGern Blansten Your Mom's Posts: 18,467
    pjl44 said:
    That's awful. I don't know how things work over there but if I was in the US I'd say hopefully you gathered as many names and pictures as possible, get to a police station immediately, and when you get yourself together look for a lawyer.
    lost cause...unless you have video of the assault
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    Johnny AbruzzoJohnny Abruzzo Philly Posts: 10,836
    Awful. Well look at what happened to the country's own soccer team after they won the Women's World Cup.
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    bootlegbootleg Posts: 640
    pjl44 said:
    That's awful. I don't know how things work over there but if I was in the US I'd say hopefully you gathered as many names and pictures as possible, get to a police station immediately, and when you get yourself together look for a lawyer.
    lost cause...unless you have video of the assault
    If before show, then assuming lights were up.  Could be some video or pics from crowd?  Not sure how you ended up getting thrown out though?  What was the escalation that caused that?
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    Kidney DonorKidney Donor Posts: 81
    If you were the tall guy in a green shirt who got tossed, a bunch of us saw it and it looked pretty clear that the guy and girl who got tossed were shitfaced. Everyone recognized them from the pre show thing. 
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    Was before show. After opener. Had been camped out a while before opener looking for a couple friends. I went to get beer.  Came back to wife shaking and crying. Told me some dude wouldn’t leave her alone and kept pressing into her aggressively. That was bad. Worse was when we reported to security who was right there. They immediately blamed my wife saying she was drunk and disorderly. Which she most definitely was not.  Worse still was fellow male fans in area witnessed it and did nothing. Even a guy from a Dublin there with his 3 kids. Apparently sexual assault is still kind of an okay thing for these a holes. I wouldn’t stand for it. This was our 43rd PJ show so it’s not like we don’t know what it’s like in the pit. Once a guy behind us said my wife deserved it I called it out to security. The next action was me and my wife being aggressively escorted out of the concert by the same security staff who was dealing with the incident.  Worse yet was we get back into security and PJ has some kind of fan handler there. Basically said we had two options. Stay in a designated area way behind pit area and not report incident,or report what happened to police but be forced to leave. Kind of a quid pro quo moment if I’ve ever seen one. We said, no, we’d like to stay since we didn’t do anything wrong and we’d like to report what happened so we could get security footage. Ended up being physically thrown out of the arena by same goon squad. We eventually went to 2 different police stations but have yet to have anyone take our report. It feels like North Korean police. Will try again tomorrow morning. But gutted by people of Barcelona, security, police, pretty much all. Love for traveling to see PJ took critical blow. 
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    RatherStarvedRatherStarved Posts: 4,590
    Sounds shitty.  See if you can get a local lawyer.  
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    edited July 8
    And luckily I was able to video tape the security guys who harassed us. Even hitting me in the head on way out. Almost broke my glasses. Of course they were trying to snatch my phone. But I got it. 
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    edited July 8
    If you were the tall guy in a green shirt who got tossed, a bunch of us saw it and it looked pretty clear that the guy and girl who got tossed were shitfaced. Everyone recognized them from the pre show thing. 

    Yes. That was us. Not shit faced. But wife was very upset. Can be confused for drunk I guess. But she wasn’t. Had maybe 2-3 beers in her from 5-8:30pm. Not nearly enough to be wasted or even that buzzed. As for me, I was very calm. Never touched a soul. And was simply asking to make a complaint and request they look at video. That seemed to tick them off for some reason. I guess that’s Spain?  We should expect that?

    Post edited by Whipping_Boy on
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    Kidney DonorKidney Donor Posts: 81
    Good luck, but if you’re the couple by the Dublin kids to Mikes side of the stage, it didn’t look to good for you as you were going out. 
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    Good luck, but if you’re the couple by the Dublin kids to Mikes side of the stage, it didn’t look to good for you as you were going out. 
    No. It wasn’t. Was pretty crazy to us. Never experienced anything like it across hundreds of different shows. And our crime was trying to report an assault. That’s it. We weren’t fighting or bothering anyone around us. Did not expect this outcome at all. 
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    rocking horserocking horse Posts: 21
    edited July 8
    I guess when you’re having some guy press himself into you constantly it can make you cry and look drunk. And even if you are drunk should someone be able to do that to you - at a concert in public with no consequences?. Spain is having a problem with their people hating tourist. Read the news. It is starting to boil over to all aspects of tourism. 
    Post edited by rocking horse on
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    Simon BaumannSimon Baumann Switzerland Posts: 68
    Sad to hear!😳
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    Micheyb21Micheyb21 UK Posts: 264
    Im so sorry this happened and hope your wife is doing ok. It makes my blood boil that we are in 2024 and still having to put up with this shit as women. And who cares if your wife was drunk or not it doesnt give a man the license to touch/assault her. Im so sorry this ruined your show and its disgusting you were kicked out. I just dont know what the answer is anymore - its sending the worst possible message that women shouldnt complain or speak up. 
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    lastexitlondonlastexitlondon Posts: 12,998
    Yeah it's alright for men to be so drunk they can't stand up and piss everyone off. Should be same rules for both and nobody should touch anyone 
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    Micheyb21 said:
    Im so sorry this happened and hope your wife is doing ok. It makes my blood boil that we are in 2024 and still having to put up with this shit as women. And who cares if your wife was drunk or not it doesnt give a man the license to touch/assault her. Im so sorry this ruined your show and its disgusting you were kicked out. I just dont know what the answer is anymore - it’s sending the worst possible message that women shouldnt complain or speak up. 

    Thanks. And for the record wife was not drunk. Angry, feeling violated and assaulted?  Yes. Appalled at response of security?  Yes. Scared when other Pearl Jam fans piled on?  Definitely. Felt like a Trump rally. PJ fans used to be way better than this. Special shout out to A hole family from
    Dublin who turned backs on whole situation. Can’t believe they are PJ fans. Several wearing Dublin shirts. And not impressed by lack of help from PJs team. Never even asked us what happened. Just said drop complaint or leave. Ridiculous. Still having hard time digesting it all. 

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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    Worst part of whole thing is wife is still crying. Devastated. Says she can’t imagine ever going to a PJ show again. Our lives were built around this band. Got married and joined fan club in 1996. And suddenly this happens and it feels like it’s all gone. Hopefully time will heal but this was one of the worst things we’ve ever been a part of. 
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    LiftedLifted Posts: 1,762
    Worst part of whole thing is wife is still crying. Devastated. Says she can’t imagine ever going to a PJ show again. Our lives were built around this band. Got married and joined fan club in 1996. And suddenly this happens and it feels like it’s all gone. Hopefully time will heal but this was one of the worst things we’ve ever been a part of. 
    This is an awful story to read, and I’m sorry it happened to your wife and you. Regarding the band, I’d try and keep things in perspective. You can’t really expect them to be able to police an entire audience, though it does seem like this was handled rather poorly by security. If it happened as you say, it is pretty ridiculous that you were forced to leave the concert.

    Unfortunately the nature of the situation is a difficult one to sort out in general. It’s hearsay, and without any direct evidence or enough witnesses to speak up, what can be done? It’s a shame that there are a lot of shitty people out there that will do this sort of thing, and also that there are people who will look the other way if it’s not happening to them. You certainly wouldn’t expect this kind of behavior at a Pearl Jam show, but there are shitty people everywhere.

    Maybe someone in the band will see this and reach out to you. I wouldn’t let this terrible experience impact your perception of them, as it’s the antithesis of what they stand for, and not at all their fault. Hopefully this incident is addressed for you both in a way that feels just.
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    Gern BlanstenGern Blansten Your Mom's Posts: 18,467
    edited July 9
    Lifted said:
    Worst part of whole thing is wife is still crying. Devastated. Says she can’t imagine ever going to a PJ show again. Our lives were built around this band. Got married and joined fan club in 1996. And suddenly this happens and it feels like it’s all gone. Hopefully time will heal but this was one of the worst things we’ve ever been a part of. 
    This is an awful story to read, and I’m sorry it happened to your wife and you. Regarding the band, I’d try and keep things in perspective. You can’t really expect them to be able to police an entire audience, though it does seem like this was handled rather poorly by security. If it happened as you say, it is pretty ridiculous that you were forced to leave the concert.

    Unfortunately the nature of the situation is a difficult one to sort out in general. It’s hearsay, and without any direct evidence or enough witnesses to speak up, what can be done? It’s a shame that there are a lot of shitty people out there that will do this sort of thing, and also that there are people who will look the other way if it’s not happening to them. You certainly wouldn’t expect this kind of behavior at a Pearl Jam show, but there are shitty people everywhere.

    Maybe someone in the band will see this and reach out to you. I wouldn’t let this terrible experience impact your perception of them, as it’s the antithesis of what they stand for, and not at all their fault. Hopefully this incident is addressed for you both in a way that feels just.
    yeah it's a shitty person that does such a thing. They knew they could get away with it because of the crowd. 

    my wife got felt up at a Toadies concert. We were just walking back through the crowd (all GA) to hit the bar or something and some guy groped her. Really nothing either of us could do because of how tight we were packed in. I was far enough behind her that I didn't see anything and by the time it happened she couldn't say for sure who did it. SOme people are just pieces of shit.
    Post edited by Gern Blansten on
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    edited July 9
    Lifted said:
    Worst part of whole thing is wife is still crying. Devastated. Says she can’t imagine ever going to a PJ show again. Our lives were built around this band. Got married and joined fan club in 1996. And suddenly this happens and it feels like it’s all gone. Hopefully time will heal but this was one of the worst things we’ve ever been a part of. 
    This is an awful story to read, and I’m sorry it happened to your wife and you. Regarding the band, I’d try and keep things in perspective. You can’t really expect them to be able to police an entire audience, though it does seem like this was handled rather poorly by security. If it happened as you say, it is pretty ridiculous that you were forced to leave the concert.

    Unfortunately the nature of the situation is a difficult one to sort out in general. It’s hearsay, and without any direct evidence or enough witnesses to speak up, what can be done? It’s a shame that there are a lot of shitty people out there that will do this sort of thing, and also that there are people who will look the other way if it’s not happening to them. You certainly wouldn’t expect this kind of behavior at a Pearl Jam show, but there are shitty people everywhere.

    Maybe someone in the band will see this and reach out to you. I wouldn’t let this terrible experience impact your perception of them, as it’s the antithesis of what they stand for, and not at all their fault. Hopefully this incident is addressed for you both in a way that feels just.
    Thanks. Totally agree with what you said. And it’s not our perception of the band that has changed.  That never will. It’s her feeling of not being safe there anymore or enjoying the feeling we usually get from the PJ family. That’s what was shattered.  Hopefully time and a new album will settle emotions. 
    Post edited by Whipping_Boy on
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    Daner90Daner90 Posts: 77
    So sorry this happened. Hopefully the guy who did it falls down a long flight of stairs
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    lastexitlondonlastexitlondon Posts: 12,998
    And becomes impotent 
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    ComeToTXComeToTX Austin Posts: 7,673
    I hate reading this.  People can be the worst!
    This show, another show, a show here and a show there.
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    teddysgirlteddysgirl Posts: 83
    Wishing you both all the best
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    Whipping_BoyWhipping_Boy Plantation, FL Posts: 161
    Wishing you both all the best
    Thanks. It means a lot. We’re kind of feeling all alone right now, so to see these posts, it helps more than you know. Much appreciated. 
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    yosiyosi NYC Posts: 2,796
    Wishing you both all the best
    Thanks. It means a lot. We’re kind of feeling all alone right now, so to see these posts, it helps more than you know. Much appreciated. 
    Sorry that on top of everything you're feeling alone. So many layers of terrible - first and foremost the vulgar, awful and illegal treatment of your wife. It sucks so much that it also affected something you cherish, your experience of Pearl Jam shows, but honestly, I totally get why. Wishing you both strength and comfort. 
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    Johnny AbruzzoJohnny Abruzzo Philly Posts: 10,836
    Really hope she can start some sort of healing process. Just awful. 
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    Get_RightGet_Right Posts: 12,591
    Sorry this happened to you and your wife. Fucking assholes. I will never understand what makes men treat women poorly and I am sorry you encountered more than one of them at a show. Truthfully there is probably very little that can be done about it. I hope your wife feels better over time. If we talk it up enough, it might reach the band. Makes no sense that you got thrown out.
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