Dying alone

Thoughts_Arrive

The thing is at times I feel confident. The problem is girls avoid me.

F Me In The Brain

Do you have a third eye?
I'm sure somewhere out there are women who are intrigued by men with 3 eyes.

rgambs

Yeah I know some seriously fat and ugly dudes that do just fine, ladies don't avoid men just because they aren't studs.
Avoid is a weird choice of words.  It tells me that either you behave like a psychopathic lunatic with open sores and people run from you, or you feel like women want to avoid you and you use any scrap of evidence you can find to reinforce that notion.  
Seriously though, lotta ladies out there and they've all got something beautiful to offer a man who knows how to recognize it.  Be that man.
Set up a classy internet dating profile and get out there meeting people, hone your skills and try to relax and not look so hard for a girlfriend, just look for interesting interactions with lovely ladies.

Hi!

Fake it til you make it doesn't seem like good relationship advice. 
Try a dating website for sure.

Thirty Bills Unpaid

A decent looking young gal married an elederly Charles Manson when he was in prison for gawds sakes.

There's a woman for everyone. Especially if you treat them nicely.

amethgr8

Fake it till you make it is more like put n a smile and see how the day goes.  If you put on a smile  the day works out, you receive some positive reinforcements either in the way of compliments, or good to see you, or good job or just no problems then that build confidence for the next day.  It's like the first day on a job you have no idea, put your uniform on and at least look the part till you can learn it.

brianlux

Thoughts_Arrive said:

The thing is at times I feel confident. The problem is girls avoid me.

The right woman didn't come into my life until I was 51.  It was worth the wait.  Don't give up hope, Thoughts!

HesCalledDyer

Pretty sure at this point I’ll continue to live alone and I’ll die alone.

I'm 40, I’m not interested in women my age, and younger women (understandably) aren’t interested in men my age unless they have money, which I don’t.

Thoughts_Arrive

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Spiritual_Chaos said:

So this has turned into a "i cant find love" thread?

Sorry for derailing my own thread.
Back on topic.
I only have immediate family here, I don't get along with mum, I am estranged from one sister, other sister has her own worries, I am single and seem unable to form relationships with women, I only have one friend I actually speak to often and see regularly, the others I only hear from online here and there. Having said that, the way it looks I will be on my own when I finally move out of my parents' home. I'll be living alone in a house or unit or apartment, won't hear from family much. I don't know, I just fear this future for me. I will be like Obi Wan Kenobi, a strange old hermit that lives somewhere secluded.

I'm about to fly to Australia and wing-man you up into the air.  You get a little wind in your sails and you'll be off to the races.

Fake it till you make is good advice.  I prefer to think of it as "make it so in your mind until everyone else catches up and then you've made it", but there's no ring to that.

People have tried to wing-man me many times to no avail.

Thoughts_Arrive

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

Annafalk

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

It’s almost hard to read how tough you are towards yourself.  Maybe online dating can be worth a try, I know a friend who met a guy that way. But it took about 35 dates until she finally had a good match so it can take time. 

Thoughts_Arrive

Annafalk said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

It’s almost hard to read how tough you are towards yourself.  Maybe online dating can be worth a try, I know a friend who met a guy that way. But it took about 35 dates until she finally had a good match so it can take time. 

I don't know, if I had more friends I'd be more comfortable.
Any potential romantic partner would wonder why I don't have friends and would probably assume something is wrong with me and I should be avoided.

rgambs

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

You don't think there are women out there that have no friends?  There are.  In my experience, women have a harder time making and keeping friendships than guys do.  It's not the red flag you want it to be.
You can't just torpedo every chance you might have because you are afraid to be rejected.  No good photos?  Really?  That's no kind of excuse.  You like good music, that's where you start with your profile.

Finding your soul mate in a magical chance meeting is something that happens in the movies.  Women (not girls, you're an adult and so are they) are not a conquest, they are an exquisite blessing.  Online dating could expose you to dozens of exquisite blessings who are open to letting you get a peek into their life.  You can't pass that up because you are afraid they won't like you, most of them won't.  You won't like half of them either, that's natural and A-OK.  You don't have to search for Mrs. Right online, just search for nice and exciting experiences.

I married my first girlfriend, been together since we were 15 years old.  I got incredibly lucky to have a beautiful woman let me into her life and I wound my way around her like a damn rubber band and didn't let up.  Very lucky, yet if I'm truly honest, there are parts of me that envy folks like you.  You get to experience a whole plethora of beautiful women in that open and hopeful way that is so special, embrace it!

Annafalk

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Annafalk said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

It’s almost hard to read how tough you are towards yourself.  Maybe online dating can be worth a try, I know a friend who met a guy that way. But it took about 35 dates until she finally had a good match so it can take time. 

I don't know, if I had more friends I'd be more comfortable.
Any potential romantic partner would wonder why I don't have friends and would probably assume something is wrong with me and I should be avoided.

Loneliness is actually quite common I think and it isn’t about your friends, it’s about you and her. 

Thoughts_Arrive

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

You don't think there are women out there that have no friends?  There are.  In my experience, women have a harder time making and keeping friendships than guys do.  It's not the red flag you want it to be.
You can't just torpedo every chance you might have because you are afraid to be rejected.  No good photos?  Really?  That's no kind of excuse.  You like good music, that's where you start with your profile.

Finding your soul mate in a magical chance meeting is something that happens in the movies.  Women (not girls, you're an adult and so are they) are not a conquest, they are an exquisite blessing.  Online dating could expose you to dozens of exquisite blessings who are open to letting you get a peek into their life.  You can't pass that up because you are afraid they won't like you, most of them won't.  You won't like half of them either, that's natural and A-OK.  You don't have to search for Mrs. Right online, just search for nice and exciting experiences.

I married my first girlfriend, been together since we were 15 years old.  I got incredibly lucky to have a beautiful woman let me into her life and I wound my way around her like a damn rubber band and didn't let up.  Very lucky, yet if I'm truly honest, there are parts of me that envy folks like you.  You get to experience a whole plethora of beautiful women in that open and hopeful way that is so special, embrace it!

Not sure what to say. 
Recent events with the opposite sex have left me feeling shit.
I was adamant a fried from university liked me. She messaged me to say we should catch up (seeing she dropped out of university and we haven't seen each other for a while) so I said yes. She then cancelled on me the day before saying something has come up and then she rescheduled and again cancelled on me saying something has come up and she'll get back to me when she's free.
That was in June last year.
Another university friend used to always sit next to me in lectures and classes but then all of a sudden ditched me. I don't care as I didn't like her romantically and found her shallow. She was more following me around. Makes me wonder why females abandon me.

Thoughts_Arrive

Annafalk said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

Annafalk said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

It’s almost hard to read how tough you are towards yourself.  Maybe online dating can be worth a try, I know a friend who met a guy that way. But it took about 35 dates until she finally had a good match so it can take time. 

I don't know, if I had more friends I'd be more comfortable.
Any potential romantic partner would wonder why I don't have friends and would probably assume something is wrong with me and I should be avoided.

Loneliness is actually quite common I think and it isn’t about your friends, it’s about you and her. 

Even my mum mentions that I have no friends and no girlfriend and asks me "who will look after you when you're old?"
I just see my future as bleak.

rgambs

Thoughts_Arrive said:

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

You don't think there are women out there that have no friends?  There are.  In my experience, women have a harder time making and keeping friendships than guys do.  It's not the red flag you want it to be.
You can't just torpedo every chance you might have because you are afraid to be rejected.  No good photos?  Really?  That's no kind of excuse.  You like good music, that's where you start with your profile.

Finding your soul mate in a magical chance meeting is something that happens in the movies.  Women (not girls, you're an adult and so are they) are not a conquest, they are an exquisite blessing.  Online dating could expose you to dozens of exquisite blessings who are open to letting you get a peek into their life.  You can't pass that up because you are afraid they won't like you, most of them won't.  You won't like half of them either, that's natural and A-OK.  You don't have to search for Mrs. Right online, just search for nice and exciting experiences.

I married my first girlfriend, been together since we were 15 years old.  I got incredibly lucky to have a beautiful woman let me into her life and I wound my way around her like a damn rubber band and didn't let up.  Very lucky, yet if I'm truly honest, there are parts of me that envy folks like you.  You get to experience a whole plethora of beautiful women in that open and hopeful way that is so special, embrace it!

Not sure what to say. 
Recent events with the opposite sex have left me feeling shit.
I was adamant a fried from university liked me. She messaged me to say we should catch up (seeing she dropped out of university and we haven't seen each other for a while) so I said yes. She then cancelled on me the day before saying something has come up and then she rescheduled and again cancelled on me saying something has come up and she'll get back to me when she's free.
That was in June last year.
Another university friend used to always sit next to me in lectures and classes but then all of a sudden ditched me. I don't care as I didn't like her romantically and found her shallow. She was more following me around. Makes me wonder why females abandon me.

Abandon?  Avoid?  
Those vocabulary choices say more about your perspective than they do about the events that you describe.

Why do we fall master Wayne?

Thoughts_Arrive

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

You don't think there are women out there that have no friends?  There are.  In my experience, women have a harder time making and keeping friendships than guys do.  It's not the red flag you want it to be.
You can't just torpedo every chance you might have because you are afraid to be rejected.  No good photos?  Really?  That's no kind of excuse.  You like good music, that's where you start with your profile.

Finding your soul mate in a magical chance meeting is something that happens in the movies.  Women (not girls, you're an adult and so are they) are not a conquest, they are an exquisite blessing.  Online dating could expose you to dozens of exquisite blessings who are open to letting you get a peek into their life.  You can't pass that up because you are afraid they won't like you, most of them won't.  You won't like half of them either, that's natural and A-OK.  You don't have to search for Mrs. Right online, just search for nice and exciting experiences.

I married my first girlfriend, been together since we were 15 years old.  I got incredibly lucky to have a beautiful woman let me into her life and I wound my way around her like a damn rubber band and didn't let up.  Very lucky, yet if I'm truly honest, there are parts of me that envy folks like you.  You get to experience a whole plethora of beautiful women in that open and hopeful way that is so special, embrace it!

Not sure what to say. 
Recent events with the opposite sex have left me feeling shit.
I was adamant a fried from university liked me. She messaged me to say we should catch up (seeing she dropped out of university and we haven't seen each other for a while) so I said yes. She then cancelled on me the day before saying something has come up and then she rescheduled and again cancelled on me saying something has come up and she'll get back to me when she's free.
That was in June last year.
Another university friend used to always sit next to me in lectures and classes but then all of a sudden ditched me. I don't care as I didn't like her romantically and found her shallow. She was more following me around. Makes me wonder why females abandon me.

Abandon?  Avoid?  
Those vocabulary choices say more about your perspective than they do about the events that you describe.

Why do we fall master Wayne?

I can't understand how she went from wanting to see me in the city to never getting back to me again. Haven't heard from her since she cancelled on me. I guess she just had second thoughts and changed her mind.

rgambs

Thoughts_Arrive said:

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

You don't think there are women out there that have no friends?  There are.  In my experience, women have a harder time making and keeping friendships than guys do.  It's not the red flag you want it to be.
You can't just torpedo every chance you might have because you are afraid to be rejected.  No good photos?  Really?  That's no kind of excuse.  You like good music, that's where you start with your profile.

Finding your soul mate in a magical chance meeting is something that happens in the movies.  Women (not girls, you're an adult and so are they) are not a conquest, they are an exquisite blessing.  Online dating could expose you to dozens of exquisite blessings who are open to letting you get a peek into their life.  You can't pass that up because you are afraid they won't like you, most of them won't.  You won't like half of them either, that's natural and A-OK.  You don't have to search for Mrs. Right online, just search for nice and exciting experiences.

I married my first girlfriend, been together since we were 15 years old.  I got incredibly lucky to have a beautiful woman let me into her life and I wound my way around her like a damn rubber band and didn't let up.  Very lucky, yet if I'm truly honest, there are parts of me that envy folks like you.  You get to experience a whole plethora of beautiful women in that open and hopeful way that is so special, embrace it!

Not sure what to say. 
Recent events with the opposite sex have left me feeling shit.
I was adamant a fried from university liked me. She messaged me to say we should catch up (seeing she dropped out of university and we haven't seen each other for a while) so I said yes. She then cancelled on me the day before saying something has come up and then she rescheduled and again cancelled on me saying something has come up and she'll get back to me when she's free.
That was in June last year.
Another university friend used to always sit next to me in lectures and classes but then all of a sudden ditched me. I don't care as I didn't like her romantically and found her shallow. She was more following me around. Makes me wonder why females abandon me.

Abandon?  Avoid?  
Those vocabulary choices say more about your perspective than they do about the events that you describe.

Why do we fall master Wayne?

I can't understand how she went from wanting to see me in the city to never getting back to me again. Haven't heard from her since she cancelled on me. I guess she just had second thoughts and changed her mind.

That is just a projection, she's probably just busy.
I have a good friend lives 30 miles away, haven't seen him in a year and a half or so, neither of us abandoned the friendship.  We just haven't hooked up in a while.  Life gets in the way.

Thoughts_Arrive

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

rgambs said:

Thoughts_Arrive said:

I don't know about online dating.
Never tried it. I've always refused to go online as I like the magic of meeting in person by chance.
I don't have any good photos of myself, my friend offered to take photos of me.
Hell knows if I know what to write on my profile. I'm quite boring tbh.
What stops me from pursuing a relationship is the fact I don't have many friends.
Any woman that learns that about me will see a red flag.

You don't think there are women out there that have no friends?  There are.  In my experience, women have a harder time making and keeping friendships than guys do.  It's not the red flag you want it to be.
You can't just torpedo every chance you might have because you are afraid to be rejected.  No good photos?  Really?  That's no kind of excuse.  You like good music, that's where you start with your profile.

Finding your soul mate in a magical chance meeting is something that happens in the movies.  Women (not girls, you're an adult and so are they) are not a conquest, they are an exquisite blessing.  Online dating could expose you to dozens of exquisite blessings who are open to letting you get a peek into their life.  You can't pass that up because you are afraid they won't like you, most of them won't.  You won't like half of them either, that's natural and A-OK.  You don't have to search for Mrs. Right online, just search for nice and exciting experiences.

I married my first girlfriend, been together since we were 15 years old.  I got incredibly lucky to have a beautiful woman let me into her life and I wound my way around her like a damn rubber band and didn't let up.  Very lucky, yet if I'm truly honest, there are parts of me that envy folks like you.  You get to experience a whole plethora of beautiful women in that open and hopeful way that is so special, embrace it!

Not sure what to say. 
Recent events with the opposite sex have left me feeling shit.
I was adamant a fried from university liked me. She messaged me to say we should catch up (seeing she dropped out of university and we haven't seen each other for a while) so I said yes. She then cancelled on me the day before saying something has come up and then she rescheduled and again cancelled on me saying something has come up and she'll get back to me when she's free.
That was in June last year.
Another university friend used to always sit next to me in lectures and classes but then all of a sudden ditched me. I don't care as I didn't like her romantically and found her shallow. She was more following me around. Makes me wonder why females abandon me.

Abandon?  Avoid?  
Those vocabulary choices say more about your perspective than they do about the events that you describe.

Why do we fall master Wayne?

I can't understand how she went from wanting to see me in the city to never getting back to me again. Haven't heard from her since she cancelled on me. I guess she just had second thoughts and changed her mind.

That is just a projection, she's probably just busy.
I have a good friend lives 30 miles away, haven't seen him in a year and a half or so, neither of us abandoned the friendship.  We just haven't hooked up in a while.  Life gets in the way.

I understand people are busy but to go that long and no communication with this girl, I don't know.
To me it's not a friendship if you don't keep in touch often.
Me and my friend regularly chat online if we can't see each other.
I haven't heard from one of my old school friend's for a long time, he invited me to his 30th and that was 2 years ago now and haven't seen him since. It makes me feel like we are not even friends.