The plague of neighborhood solicitors and other neighborhood observations.
deadendp
Northeast Ohio Posts: 10,434
We have people canvass our little dead end street on a fairly frequent basis. Years ago, we were hailed (as in golf balls from the sky) and roofers were flying up and down the one block road and beating on every door. I put up a "No soliciting, please" sign on my front door. That took care of the storm chasers, but I find that the Baptists, Jehovah's Witnesses, lawn care chemical companies and phone companies think that the sign does not apply to them. They'll even approach me in the yard.
A few weeks ago, I saw a troupe of old folks canvassing the neighborhood. They would be the JWs. Now, I watched the woman catch sight of me in my kitchen window. I was cooking dinner and doing dishes. Okay. She eagerly walks down my drive. She stops. She sees the sign on the front door. She turned and went to the side door. The side door has the EXACT same sign. :knock, knock, knock: I wait a few. She's still there. I opened the door a few inches and said, "No soliciting!" I closed it back up quickly. I did catch the look on her face. She was shocked. The sign was right at eye level and isn't in 10 point font. She saw it. She knew.
Fast forward to today. We had a group of young ladies knock on the door. We continued with what we were doing. Our house policy is that if we don't know you, answering the door is optional. We chose not to answer. They left us a bible tract. I was standing, prepared to meet them on the other side and to tell them that I noticed that they had accidentally left their literature on my door. I decided to e-mail their church instead.
"Please know that your young ladies were canvassing the neighborhood and though my door has a sign that said no soliciting, they knocked anyway. That sign did apply to them. We have a church. We believe in God. We treated their visit just as we do JWs, lawn companies and phone company peddlers-- we didn't answer."
Last summer, a church stopped by asking if we "got any kids." No, creeper dude, we DON'T have any kids. We do, but not for you to creep on. He gave us an invitation for children to come to his house for Backyard Bible Club. No thank you. I don't know you. I e-mailed his church. His church basically treated me as if I were a bothered heathen. I could have responded back, but it was falling on deaf ears.
I'd really love to put a sign on my door that says:
1. Jesus is our man. We have religion covered.
2. We have the cookies. We don't need more. If we do, we have a dealer.
3. We like our phone service.
4. We don't need your cable.
5. We don't want your chemicals on our yard, even if you insist that we're "the only ones in the neighborhood without" because, well, that's a flat lie. Organic is the new green, after all.
6. Our child may not come to your house for Backyard Bible Club. We don't know you.
7. We have a child in school and have fundraisers. I'm not being cheap, but understand that we have to buy from her first even if you don't agree. (I had a child argue with me.)
Why is it that people think that it is their right to stop by my house, knock on my door and expect me to answer it? How do you handle solicitors?
We're not crabby people, but we just don't like strangers coming to our home.
Do you have other observations about your neighborhood? Share them. It's not off topic. This is the kind of stuff that makes us laugh!
A few weeks ago, I saw a troupe of old folks canvassing the neighborhood. They would be the JWs. Now, I watched the woman catch sight of me in my kitchen window. I was cooking dinner and doing dishes. Okay. She eagerly walks down my drive. She stops. She sees the sign on the front door. She turned and went to the side door. The side door has the EXACT same sign. :knock, knock, knock: I wait a few. She's still there. I opened the door a few inches and said, "No soliciting!" I closed it back up quickly. I did catch the look on her face. She was shocked. The sign was right at eye level and isn't in 10 point font. She saw it. She knew.
Fast forward to today. We had a group of young ladies knock on the door. We continued with what we were doing. Our house policy is that if we don't know you, answering the door is optional. We chose not to answer. They left us a bible tract. I was standing, prepared to meet them on the other side and to tell them that I noticed that they had accidentally left their literature on my door. I decided to e-mail their church instead.
"Please know that your young ladies were canvassing the neighborhood and though my door has a sign that said no soliciting, they knocked anyway. That sign did apply to them. We have a church. We believe in God. We treated their visit just as we do JWs, lawn companies and phone company peddlers-- we didn't answer."
Last summer, a church stopped by asking if we "got any kids." No, creeper dude, we DON'T have any kids. We do, but not for you to creep on. He gave us an invitation for children to come to his house for Backyard Bible Club. No thank you. I don't know you. I e-mailed his church. His church basically treated me as if I were a bothered heathen. I could have responded back, but it was falling on deaf ears.
I'd really love to put a sign on my door that says:
1. Jesus is our man. We have religion covered.
2. We have the cookies. We don't need more. If we do, we have a dealer.
3. We like our phone service.
4. We don't need your cable.
5. We don't want your chemicals on our yard, even if you insist that we're "the only ones in the neighborhood without" because, well, that's a flat lie. Organic is the new green, after all.
6. Our child may not come to your house for Backyard Bible Club. We don't know you.
7. We have a child in school and have fundraisers. I'm not being cheap, but understand that we have to buy from her first even if you don't agree. (I had a child argue with me.)
Why is it that people think that it is their right to stop by my house, knock on my door and expect me to answer it? How do you handle solicitors?
We're not crabby people, but we just don't like strangers coming to our home.
Do you have other observations about your neighborhood? Share them. It's not off topic. This is the kind of stuff that makes us laugh!
2014: Cincinnati
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
Post edited by deadendp on
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I get the Con Ed people. They are pretending to be from Con Ed to get you to give them your bill so they can make a note of some numbers on your account so they can try to sign you up for some third party billing bullshit. They flat out lie to you about a rebate just so they can sign you up to their scam. Gave me the same "you're the last apartment in the building" bullshit. It's awful when they come to your door cuz they've basically got you cornered. Especially if you have a doorbell from hell like mine.
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I refuse to answer the door, even if they see me sitting in my living room. Fuck 'em. Although I feel a little bad for the high school senior hippy dippy chick, full of idealism, trying to save some furry creature in some country I've never heard of and trying really hard to get me to pledge $25 a month to an organization I've never heard of and when I fill out my name address email I never get anything anyway. You're young, I get it, you'll be wise someday. Now get off my porch and go to college and wisen up.
Libtardaplorable©. And proud of it.
Brilliantati©
Our next-door neighbor is Mormon. When he moved in, he came by to introduce himself. Fine. Somehow religion came up, I said we were Episcopalian and went to a certain church. He said he was Mormon. Fine. Then he started coming by, calling, emailing, inviting us to Mormon events like "Learn About the Real Joseph Smith." No, thanks. We're Episcopalian. Progressive Episcopalian. This went on and on and we tried to stay polite (because he lives next door). It took a couple years and the invitations finally stopped.
Years ago when my son was little we had a nanny/babysitter from Belize and she was a fabulous nanny/babysitter and a BEAST when it came to solicitors. She'd fling open the door and yell at them, "Get out of here and never come back!" I wish I could do that.
On the other hand, I recently WANTED the yard aerator guys to come do my yard. They were roaming the neighbourhood trying to drum up business. I have a long, steep set of stairs down to my back yard and basically wanted someone else to have the hassle of carrying the aerator down to the yard and back up again, so I was willing to pay. I had to chase them down in the street, then call them when they didn't show up at the time we had agreed on, then call again when they were another 30 minutes late. My stalking eventually paid off, though, and my lawn got aerated.
Another time some carpet cleaners were trying to get in my house to demonstrate their product. Like a little too intrusive. Kept looking around me to see what I had. Felt like they were scoping my house out and were going to come back and rob the place. I had to be an asshole with them. Basically, right before they left my next words were going to be if you don't leave I'm calling the cops. Maybe I should have, but nobody on my street got robbed or their carpets cleaned.
Since I live in the city, there are people who knock on doors to check and see if people are home so they can come back and break-in, and of course the neighborhood is dense so people like to solicit. You're damned to answer the door or not.
We recently got a strange envelope in the mail, I check the return address, "who the he'll do we know that lives in the U-district?"...open the envelope, in shaky chickenscratch, "we invite you to celebrate the death of our beloved..." there is a flyer that mentions 'the watchtower', so I start thinking of Jimi...or PJ, freaking JW's! I learned long ago to not be nice to the religious recruiters, if you're nice and accept anything you'll go on their 'list', and they will never leave you alone. Makes me wonder if I can get the Mormons, JWs, Christians and B'hai people to all show up at my door at the same time.
I'm just glad I have a little dog that barks up a shit storm when someone knocks on the door...never thought I'd be saying that, but it's great. Most people don't want to hear her constantly bark at them, so when I say, "no thanks" they usually don't push any further.
- Christopher McCandless
2009 - Toronto
2010 - Buffalo
2011 - Toronto 1&2
2013 - London, Pittsburgh, Buffalo
2014 - Cincinnati, St. Louis, Detroit
2016 - Ft. Lauderdale, Miami, Ottawa, Toronto 1
2018 - Fenway 1&2
2022 - Hamilton, Toronto
2023 - Chicago 1&2
2024 - Las Vegas 1&2
The one time I took the Watchtower stuff to just make the woman go away. My mom told me that they would continue to return. I knew when she said she was coming back. I left her information and information from my church for her. She left me a note and my info and said that she could see that we looked at religion differently. She never returned again.
It's getting on to election season again. The one guy scared my daughter. She thought he was a scary homeless guy on the porch. (He was running to be our Senate rep.) She thought he came to "take her dinner." She was maybe 3 1/2. I've had politicians follow me on walks down the street with my daughter. Once, K- fell, split her lip and I was running her back home to tend to her wounds. The politician was running with me, and not pausing, all the while wearing heels. Wow. She didn't care that my child was bleeding profusely. She just wanted me to vote for her. I did not vote for her.
It also bugs me when these people approach my daughter. She likes to hang outside. She now knows that if she sees a stranger on the street (again, a dead end street and we know everyone) that she is to come inside until they go away.
I don't come to your house peddling my religion or 5 gallon buckets of cookie dough. (That is hilarious!) Don't come to mine!
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
I try not to answer the door... The problem is I have a 2 year old who naps... as well as 2 Jack Russells who go BONKERS when the doorbell rings. So that pisses me off.
I do remember the Hare Krishna folks at LAX though, looking for donations and potential new members (not sure if that's the right term).
My mom always advised me to "stay away from them", but I was enamored of the their music, happiness, and those odd cool little ponytails.
Entertaining and interesting thread!
Fuckus rules all
Rob
Seattle
For the young Mormons missionaries my wife used to laugh as when they would catch me in the right mood I would invite them in and talk with them to try and convert them. Challenge their belief structure and they won't know how to answer. Ask them if they are a good person and when they reply of course ask why then they need a god to tell them to not hurt others. Ask them if god gave you a hand, gave you your private parts and made masturbating feel so good why then god would be against them doing it. They will give you some crap about leading to the devil. Keep going back to saying I am a very good person who helps others and I don't need a god to make me one. Ask them why they believe Gandhi is burning in hell when he did spend his whole existence pushing for peace for mankind. Ask how they can believe Mother Theresa is burning in hell when all she did her whole life was help the sick. Keep pushing philosophical questions on them. They were taught to reply with certain answers and that is all they know. At one point you will see them start thinking and that is when you push that their religion is crap. I think over they years I may have pushed one or two closer to a non believer. All those missionary kids grew up in Mormonism but are still teenagers with teenage thoughts.
Fuckus rules all
Rob
Seattle
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Tattooed Dissident!
Tattooed Dissident!
He does listen to death metal, so perhaps I should keep some at the ready in the living room.
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
Up
Date the music.. Lol
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
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Fuckus rules all
Rob
Seattle
We walk in the evenings through the one housing development that connects to our neighborhood. It was around graduation time and there was a huge banner hanging on a house. "Excepted to Duke with full honors."
Excepted? Okay then.
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
Fuckus rules all
Rob
Seattle