California mayor says bullied kids need to grow a pair.

backseatLover12

catefrances said:

Cosmo said:

I think that if people taught their kids to protect the weak and not to pick on them... the problem might get solved.
Everyone seems to tell the weaker kid he needs to be more like the asshole kid. How about teaching your asshole kids to stop being assholes?

much like rape cosmo.. how about we teach our boys to respect females instead of blaming the victim for wearing 'slutty' clothes or questioning her allowance of being out at all hours. the weak, the quiet, the 'different' need to be held alongside us, NOT trodden underfoot.

Great point. But because taking care of each other is seen as "Socialism" by many, society rather scoffs at the victim rather than help. And of course, nothing is done to the aggressor, the angry aggressor who tends to be accepted in this culture.

Thirty Bills Unpaid

Cosmo said:

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

Cosmo said:

I think that if people taught their kids to protect the weak and not to pick on them... the problem might get solved.
Everyone seems to tell the weaker kid he needs to be more like the asshole kid. How about teaching your asshole kids to stop being assholes?

This was an inherent part to the discussion.
The problem is the fact that there are countless useless parents that are incapable of- or indifferent to- spending time with their children and raising them correctly.
Kids that are assholes come by it honestly.

...
I can't understand the adult in the equation... the one that tells kids they need to resort to violence and 'fight Back'. Why not just tell the kid to brandish a gun? I mean, no one is going to fuck with a wimpy kid with a gun, right? Weren't the Columbine kids picked on by the kids at school? Is reacting like they did part of the process of growing some balls? I mean.. at the base of is... Eric and Dylan technically... did fight back.
Who is raising these kids that think it's okay to pick on other... weaker kids?

The parent of the bullied child is dealt a different hand than the parent of a bully. Kids need to be taught not to become a victim. Of course diplomacy is the first line of defence, but when words fail... what's a kid to do?

In those two kids' cases... if they had smacked someone in grade 5 or 6... they possibly wouldn't have been subjected to the abuse that continued to plague them throughout their years: resulting in them expressing their anger as they did as seniors.

Remember... bullies target 'victims'. They are cowards and they are not typically prone to picking on kids that are known to stand up for themselves.

Cosmo

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

The parent of the bullied child is dealt a different hand than the parent of a bully. Kids need to be taught not to become a victim. Of course diplomacy is the first line of defence, but when words fail... what's a kid to do?

In those two kids' cases... if they had smacked someone in grade 5 or 6... they possibly wouldn't have been subjected to the abuse that continued to plague them throughout their years: resulting in them expressing their anger as they did as seniors.

Remember... bullies target 'victims'. They are cowards and they are not typically prone to picking on kids that are known to stand up for themselves.

...
Some kids just can't help it. We all remember that scrawny kid in elementary school that couldn't catch a balloon, let alone a football or baseball. Or that odd kid that stuttered or the fat kid or whatever. In most, if not all cases, those kids are goiing to get their asses kicked if they decide one day to fight back. And if they fight back once... they can expect a daily ass kicking for the rest of the school year from the asshole kid that likes proving himself against the ones that are weaker. The weaker kids can't help being seen as victims by asshole kids. It's the asshole kids that need to stop seeing victims.
And i believe in the basic premise that if you follow an asshole kid home... you'll find an asshole parent there.

Thirty Bills Unpaid

Cosmo said:

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

The parent of the bullied child is dealt a different hand than the parent of a bully. Kids need to be taught not to become a victim. Of course diplomacy is the first line of defence, but when words fail... what's a kid to do?

In those two kids' cases... if they had smacked someone in grade 5 or 6... they possibly wouldn't have been subjected to the abuse that continued to plague them throughout their years: resulting in them expressing their anger as they did as seniors.

Remember... bullies target 'victims'. They are cowards and they are not typically prone to picking on kids that are known to stand up for themselves.

...
Some kids just can't help it. We all remember that scrawny kid in elementary school that couldn't catch a balloon, let alone a football or baseball. Or that odd kid that stuttered or the fat kid or whatever. In most, if not all cases, those kids are goiing to get their asses kicked if they decide one day to fight back. And if they fight back once... they can expect a daily ass kicking for the rest of the school year from the asshole kid that likes proving himself against the ones that are weaker. The weaker kids can't help being seen as victims by asshole kids. It's the asshole kids that need to stop seeing victims.
And i believe in the basic premise that if you follow an asshole kid home... you'll find an asshole parent there.

We're pretty closely aligned on this issue.

Trust me when I say that when the 'fat kid' punches his tormentor in the face... around here anyways... the tormenting stops. This has been my experience as a high school teacher for 20 years. For one, the bully doesn't have a defenceless victim to torture anymore. Secondly, the incident is always referred to the administration where the it is documented and the bully moves up the progressive discipline scale that becomes increasingly and dramatically heavy-handed.

gimmesometruth27

i was bullied up until i was in 9th grade. to this day i will swear that the way i was treated by my peers is a direct cause of the insecurity and anxiety and depression that i experienced throughout my entire life.

to simply tell bullied people that they need to grow a pair is insulting and it shows a clear lack of understanding of the dynamics that cause bullies to act the way they do.

sure, i "grew a pair" and fought and stood up for myself several times. as soon as i would win a fight, the bully would come back with friends. either way, if i won a fight, i would lose the war.

most of those guys are in jail now, so i guess i won in that respect. one of them 3 years ago looked me up on facebook and sent me a message apologizing to me for the time he ruptured my eardrum by clapping his hands on my ears. this happened 27 years ago and i had to have surgery. he said he has felt bad about it for years. turns out he was in a 12 step program and was at the step where he had to apologize to all of the people he had wronged. i am not sure if he actually meant it, or if it was some way of him trying to make it right inside his head.

turns out, he failed that program, got drunk, got in a bar fight, beat up a guy and was convicted of attempted murder.

mattsl1983

So from the comments I'm guessing most of you think that we should always go to someone else when we have problems? Let's just always rely on someone else to help? No need to stand up for yourself as a first course of action, but rather just go to someone else and they will take care of it?

dignin

mattsl1983 said:

So from the comments I'm guessing most of you think that we should always go to someone else when we have problems? Let's just always rely on someone else to help? No need to stand up for yourself as a first course of action, but rather just go to someone else and they will take care of it?

Yes, I'm sure that is exactly what most of us are saying.......

PJ_Soul

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

I don't even care about the wording. While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be), bullying is still fucking wrong and I think this mayor's message does more to excuse bullying and bullies than it does give any useful hints to potential victims of bullying, and that's not cool. Even though I think that most parents and children these days definitely do need to grow a pair. I mean, we all know how much the term bullying is thrown around these days - christ, you can't say anything negative to anyone without someone crying bully - and that applies to all kinds of different things, there should still be a zero-tolerance attitude towards actual bullying. In fact, I think the people who punish bullies also have to grow a pair.

dignin

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

PJ_Soul

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

jmuscatello

mattsl1983 said:

So from the comments I'm guessing most of you think that we should always go to someone else when we have problems? Let's just always rely on someone else to help? No need to stand up for yourself as a first course of action, but rather just go to someone else and they will take care of it?

not a very good guess, really. we are talking about kids here.

Halifax2TheMax

mattsl1983 said:

So from the comments I'm guessing most of you think that we should always go to someone else when we have problems? Let's just always rely on someone else to help? No need to stand up for yourself as a first course of action, but rather just go to someone else and they will take care of it?

So when my kid is threatened with or experiences physical violence by someone who has 100 or more pounds on them, you'd be okay with my kid shooting the bully with a legally, or otherwise, obtained gun and claiming self defense? At what point after sticking up for themselves should my kid "go to someone else to take care of it?"

Peace.

PJ_Soul

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

Cosmo said:

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

The parent of the bullied child is dealt a different hand than the parent of a bully. Kids need to be taught not to become a victim. Of course diplomacy is the first line of defence, but when words fail... what's a kid to do?

In those two kids' cases... if they had smacked someone in grade 5 or 6... they possibly wouldn't have been subjected to the abuse that continued to plague them throughout their years: resulting in them expressing their anger as they did as seniors.

Remember... bullies target 'victims'. They are cowards and they are not typically prone to picking on kids that are known to stand up for themselves.

...
Some kids just can't help it. We all remember that scrawny kid in elementary school that couldn't catch a balloon, let alone a football or baseball. Or that odd kid that stuttered or the fat kid or whatever. In most, if not all cases, those kids are goiing to get their asses kicked if they decide one day to fight back. And if they fight back once... they can expect a daily ass kicking for the rest of the school year from the asshole kid that likes proving himself against the ones that are weaker. The weaker kids can't help being seen as victims by asshole kids. It's the asshole kids that need to stop seeing victims.
And i believe in the basic premise that if you follow an asshole kid home... you'll find an asshole parent there.

We're pretty closely aligned on this issue.

Trust me when I say that when the 'fat kid' punches his tormentor in the face... around here anyways... the tormenting stops. This has been my experience as a high school teacher for 20 years. For one, the bully doesn't have a defenceless victim to torture anymore. Secondly, the incident is always referred to the administration where the it is documented and the bully moves up the progressive discipline scale that becomes increasingly and dramatically heavy-handed.

I have a friend who was terribly bullied when he was a kid because he was huge. Like, 6'4" in grade 6 and fat to boot, but gentle as can be. So he would simply try to defend himself from random physical attacks by bullies by just pushing them away or even just sitting on them to stop them from attacking him, and then HE was the one who got in shit, because the teachers figured the smaller viscous bullies couldn't defend themselves against this monstrously large kid. The tormenting went on and on. This was in the 90s. Moral of the story - teachers/admin don't always do a good job of stopping bullying.

dignin

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

I was in no way offended. Saying pussification, to me, implies feminization. If we are worried about a misogynist world wouldn't we strive for more pussification? A more gentle, kinder world?

PJ_Soul

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

I was in no way offended. Saying pussification, to me, implies feminization. If we are worried about a misogynist world wouldn't we strive for more pussification? A more gentle, kinder world?

Ohh, lol. I gotcha. I didn't equate the opposite of pussification to a less gentle world necessarily. When I think of this issue, I think about how kids aren't even being prepared for the real world at all. I.e. kids getting trophies for last place and shit like that. Or people in their 20s being their moms to their first day of work after university (yes, this happens!!!!), or simply not having the guts to take control of their own business or well-being. It didn't occur to me that it might mean marching around acting like some stupid tough guy, peeing on things to mark territory or whatever, lol. Also, pussification in NO way implies feminization to me, because that would suggest that females aren't tough, which is, of course, total nonsense. And alternately, you are suggesting that females are kinder than men, which I would also say is bullshit. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were women.

Thirty Bills Unpaid

PJ_Soul said:

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

Cosmo said:

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

The parent of the bullied child is dealt a different hand than the parent of a bully. Kids need to be taught not to become a victim. Of course diplomacy is the first line of defence, but when words fail... what's a kid to do?

In those two kids' cases... if they had smacked someone in grade 5 or 6... they possibly wouldn't have been subjected to the abuse that continued to plague them throughout their years: resulting in them expressing their anger as they did as seniors.

Remember... bullies target 'victims'. They are cowards and they are not typically prone to picking on kids that are known to stand up for themselves.

...
Some kids just can't help it. We all remember that scrawny kid in elementary school that couldn't catch a balloon, let alone a football or baseball. Or that odd kid that stuttered or the fat kid or whatever. In most, if not all cases, those kids are goiing to get their asses kicked if they decide one day to fight back. And if they fight back once... they can expect a daily ass kicking for the rest of the school year from the asshole kid that likes proving himself against the ones that are weaker. The weaker kids can't help being seen as victims by asshole kids. It's the asshole kids that need to stop seeing victims.
And i believe in the basic premise that if you follow an asshole kid home... you'll find an asshole parent there.

We're pretty closely aligned on this issue.

Trust me when I say that when the 'fat kid' punches his tormentor in the face... around here anyways... the tormenting stops. This has been my experience as a high school teacher for 20 years. For one, the bully doesn't have a defenceless victim to torture anymore. Secondly, the incident is always referred to the administration where the it is documented and the bully moves up the progressive discipline scale that becomes increasingly and dramatically heavy-handed.

I have a friend who was terribly bullied when he was a kid because he was huge. Like, 6'4" in grade 6 and fat to boot, but gentle as can be. So he would simply try to defend himself from random physical attacks by bullies by just pushing them away or even just sitting on them to stop them from attacking him, and then HE was the one who got in shit, because the teachers figured the smaller viscous bullies couldn't defend themselves against this monstrously large kid. The tormenting went on and on. This was in the 90s. Moral of the story - teachers/admin don't always do a good job of stopping bullying.

You'll love this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCbqklG3AZk

dignin

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

I was in no way offended. Saying pussification, to me, implies feminization. If we are worried about a misogynist world wouldn't we strive for more pussification? A more gentle, kinder world?

Ohh, lol. I gotcha. I didn't equate the opposite of pussification to a less gentle world necessarily. When I think of this issue, I think about how kids aren't even being prepared for the real world at all. I.e. kids getting trophies for last place and shit like that. Or people in their 20s being their moms to their first day of work after university (yes, this happens!!!!), or simply not having the guts to take control of their own business or well-being. It didn't occur to me that it might mean marching around acting like some stupid tough guy, peeing on things to mark territory or whatever, lol. Also, pussification in NO way implies feminization to me, because that would suggest that females aren't tough, which is, of course, total nonsense. And alternately, you are suggesting that females are kinder than men, which I would also say is bullshit. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were women.

I consider myself a feminist. I want equal rights for women. If I had a daughter I would want her to have all the same opportunities that a man would have and all that. Where I differ from some feminists is the belief that we are the same. We are not, we will never be.

I think that men are more aggressive and violent. We have different levels of chemicals floating around in our brains. I do not believe we were raised that way, I think we were born that way.

But there are always exception to the rule.

Thirty Bills Unpaid

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

I was in no way offended. Saying pussification, to me, implies feminization. If we are worried about a misogynist world wouldn't we strive for more pussification? A more gentle, kinder world?

Ohh, lol. I gotcha. I didn't equate the opposite of pussification to a less gentle world necessarily. When I think of this issue, I think about how kids aren't even being prepared for the real world at all. I.e. kids getting trophies for last place and shit like that. Or people in their 20s being their moms to their first day of work after university (yes, this happens!!!!), or simply not having the guts to take control of their own business or well-being. It didn't occur to me that it might mean marching around acting like some stupid tough guy, peeing on things to mark territory or whatever, lol. Also, pussification in NO way implies feminization to me, because that would suggest that females aren't tough, which is, of course, total nonsense. And alternately, you are suggesting that females are kinder than men, which I would also say is bullshit. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were women.

I think that men are more aggressive and violent. We have different levels of chemicals floating around in our brains. I do not believe we were raised that way, I think we were born that way.

But there are always exception to the rule.

I would argue that it is a bit of both. We are wired a certain way- and we are raised differently than girls.

Look at the toys bought for little boys compared to girls. Look at the activities we place boys in compared to girls. Look at the mentalities we forge in boys compared to girls.

PJ_Soul

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

I was in no way offended. Saying pussification, to me, implies feminization. If we are worried about a misogynist world wouldn't we strive for more pussification? A more gentle, kinder world?

Ohh, lol. I gotcha. I didn't equate the opposite of pussification to a less gentle world necessarily. When I think of this issue, I think about how kids aren't even being prepared for the real world at all. I.e. kids getting trophies for last place and shit like that. Or people in their 20s being their moms to their first day of work after university (yes, this happens!!!!), or simply not having the guts to take control of their own business or well-being. It didn't occur to me that it might mean marching around acting like some stupid tough guy, peeing on things to mark territory or whatever, lol. Also, pussification in NO way implies feminization to me, because that would suggest that females aren't tough, which is, of course, total nonsense. And alternately, you are suggesting that females are kinder than men, which I would also say is bullshit. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were women.

I consider myself a feminist. I want equal rights for women. If I had a daughter I would want her to have all the same opportunities that a man would have and all that. Where I differ from some feminists is the belief that we are the same. We are not, we will never be.

I think that men are more aggressive and violent. We have different levels of chemicals floating around in our brains. I do not believe we were raised that way, I think we were born that way.

But there are always exception to the rule.

I agree that men and women aren't the same.... Are there actually still feminists out there who think that? I thought that kind of thinking had become nearly obsolete by now... kind of an attitude that swept feminism in earlier days of the movement. That said, I think men have changed as well as women. I think certain sensitivities have crossed over in the past 40 years or so, and the lines are a lot more blurry than they used to be when you're talking aggressiveness and emotional sensibility, especially since humans are able to feed off of higher level thinking rather than just instinct. But yeah, of course testosterone still plays a role.

dignin

Thirty Bills Unpaid said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

dignin said:

PJ_Soul said:

mattsl1983 said:

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/oddnews/california-mayor-sparks-controversy-by-telling-bullying-victims-to-‘grow-a-pair’-172657192.html

I posted the yahoo link due to that we all know they are unbiased and conisitantly misspell words ect ect.

I like his message. Could he have used better wording? Of course. But I like it, let's stop the pussification of this country.

While I totally agree that North America is being severely pussified and something has to be done about that (but nothing will be)

So, let me get this right. In one thread you say there is a problem with misogyny in our society and then you make a statement like this. I am confused.

What are you confused about? That I used the term pussification? Don't be confused. I've just got a potty mouth and don't put any stock in a word like that having any impact on real shit. If the term "pussification" never existed or disappeared forever right now, that would have no impact either way on misogyny in our society. I generally only care about things that actually matter, not silly little things like how the term "pussy" might be related to women.... And btw, ever heard of scaredy cats? Pussy cats are wimps sometimes. Sometimes when my cat is sketching out as cats are wont to do, I tell her to stop being a pussy, and then chuckle.

If anything was going to offend you in that context, it should have been "grow a pair". As though testicles make people tough. Pfft. But again, stupid shit like that doesn't matter. We're talking about real stuff here.

I was in no way offended. Saying pussification, to me, implies feminization. If we are worried about a misogynist world wouldn't we strive for more pussification? A more gentle, kinder world?

Ohh, lol. I gotcha. I didn't equate the opposite of pussification to a less gentle world necessarily. When I think of this issue, I think about how kids aren't even being prepared for the real world at all. I.e. kids getting trophies for last place and shit like that. Or people in their 20s being their moms to their first day of work after university (yes, this happens!!!!), or simply not having the guts to take control of their own business or well-being. It didn't occur to me that it might mean marching around acting like some stupid tough guy, peeing on things to mark territory or whatever, lol. Also, pussification in NO way implies feminization to me, because that would suggest that females aren't tough, which is, of course, total nonsense. And alternately, you are suggesting that females are kinder than men, which I would also say is bullshit. Some of the nastiest people I have ever met were women.

I think that men are more aggressive and violent. We have different levels of chemicals floating around in our brains. I do not believe we were raised that way, I think we were born that way.

But there are always exception to the rule.

I would argue that it is a bit of both. We are wired a certain way- and we are raised differently than girls.

Look at the toys bought for little boys compared to girls. Look at the activities we place boys in compared to girls. Look at the mentalities we forge in boys compared to girls.

I would agree with most of this. In my experience seeing my friends kids and my nieces and nephews around me grow up though it does seem that the boys seem to gravitate toward the more stereotypical boys toys and the same goes for the girls. Without obvious bias from parents.

It's not always the case. Sometimes the girls pick up a gun and the boys pick up a doll.

This is all anecdotal though.