Pot and Teens
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Found out my 16 year old sister tried pot for the 1st time recently. I'm older then her and am expecting my 1st child shortly, but not sure how to handle this. I told her to keep her priorities in order and that we would talk more later, but its later now and I don't know what to say. Anybody have siblings/children in a similar situation have any advice on how to respond?
. . . the in between is mine.
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Son, now 21, loved pot. When I first found out about his first time smoking, I was non judgemental, "did you like it, how did it make you feel", I did not so any emotion when he said he loved it. We talked about brain development and the effects of drugs on a still developing brain, how that could effect personal long term goals. Moved on to my feelings (which are really on the fence about it all), not to ever be in the house because I make the rules under this roof. Closed with what the laws state, and the fact that if he got caught he would have to pay for his consequences. BUT the key is to not be preachy. Listen to why they liked it or did it.
He is now a junior at ASU in Criminal Justice, Dean's list, just got hired full-time by ASU parking enforcement (tuition now paid in full ). He knows he needs to be clean 5 years to get hired as a cop, and used those personal goals to drive his actions through college.
They do grow up
Now his dad had different feelings as he was a dealer. Spent time locked up for selling (turned rat to get out early, which disgusts me even more).
I lived with my "God" sister, and she mainly looked after me. When I was that age she caught me smoking pot. She also had a talk with me. She said , "Hey girl, you can't smoke that. You can't hang out with your friends until after you do your chores. As long as you keep your straight A's, and don't be stupid about it... I don't have a problem with you doing that. You know that I'm always here for you, but I'll kick your ass if start doing anything else."
I have a younger brother. He had his first POT when he was 28, and he didn't like it.
16 years old, it that special age, when you suddenly know everything, right?
Think of all the other stuff out there, like bath salts and that spice crap. She is going to experiment. As the older sibling, it would be a good thing if she could always feels like she can talk to you. Like you had said, she keeps her priorities in order.
I hope this helps.
Good Luck
as you said, it is a good idea for folks to keep their priorities in order... fact.
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
Just continue to be there for her and be honest with her.
I'm not sure what your experience with it is, if any...but you have many good sources of information here, for sure - both on the positive and negative.
(and, I don't mean to belittle your worries, but as Staysea mentioned, holy hell at the plethora of really dangerous shit out there. Smoking weed - at 16 yet - IS par for the course)
I over heard an alcoholic say, "If drinking and driving is illegal? Why do bars have parking spaces?"
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
So here's my response...
A friend of mine asked me this morning for some advice on how to talk to her 19 yr old college freshman son about his marijuana use.
Just to be clear I don't smoke pot but did as a teenager.
We live in Colorado where under 1 ounce is legal for people over 21.
I am all for the legalization of marijuana purely for the tax income to fix the school sytem in Colorado.
Her big concern was for him it is still illegal and he doesn't have a job so he is essentially using her money to buy his pot.
Oh yeah....his dad is a cop!!
I told her to come up with her talking points in order of importance to her.
To meet him on neutral ground when he has been awake for awhile.
To explain to him that she knows about his use and that she is willing to cut him off financially.
That he need to be careful to not let it become a "problem" from both a health and financial perspective.
That he needs to be responsible for his actions.
That if he wants to continue smoking pot he needs to get a job because she will not pay for it.
For your sister be clear with her how you feel about it. be clear about the ramifications of drug use.
Don't attack her and be honest.
Good luck
Mental illness, paranoia, psychosis, and schizophrenia have all been linked to marijuana use. Not everyone exhibits these diagnoses, but some do. Pot use quadruples teens chances for developing schizophrenia. A fairly high price for a recreational high.
Pot is not harmless. The dope kids get today is way more potent than the dope we smoked as teens.
http://www.cbc.ca/player/Shows/Shows/Th ... 398511775/
What is the answer? Not sure. Educating the kid about the 'downside of high' would be a good idea.
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
where did you grow up? do you have siblings?
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
Maybe... but this doesn't refute the point. The kid with the underlying dormant mental illness is at risk when smoking marijuana. And it is inconclusive exactly how much extended use destroys typical brain regulatory channels.
I'm not deliberately trying to be the 'square' on the pot thread. I used to argue that pot did nothing and for many... it doesn't. The sad truth is though that regular or heavy usage does have an effect and for some... a major effect. Whether that be lung disease, memory loss, apathy, or something I mentioned before such as a mental illness... it must be acknowledged that pot does affect people.
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
It's a little more than a 'simple flowering plant'.
Whiskey and alcohol can become problematic too and kids need to be educated about alcohol as well.
Hey... I'm not saying we lock up our children and ground them when we discover them smoking dope. I'm saying as a minimum, let's do our jobs as adults: educate them about the things they likely haven't heard from their friends or by doing their own research and let them make the decisions they feel they must once they understand the product they are interested in.
It's not always a bad thing, right? Exercise responsibility, be smart in your decisions.
Experimentation is part of life too - lessons. Have to fuck up now and then, and then learn from it.
I have definitely seen it reduce people's quality of life though, and I've seen it lower people's potential severely (hey, maybe it lowered mine... I'm doing fine, but for all I know, if I'd never smoked dope I would be a rich doctor or something! Who knows! And that statement right there is a good reason to dissuade young people from touching the stuff). I think that how individuals handle pot use is determined by their natural disposition, actually. Some dispositions are just better suited to responsible use than others. Those others tend to burn out hard.
You don't believe in drug induced paranoia?
riding passager in a cramped truck. four of us in a two seater. the driver not tripping says to us, 'the cops are following us' holy fucking shit i about had a heart attack & was scared shitless.
there was no cop. it was new years eve about 1 or 2 a.m. & he thought he was funny. also... the best weed to smoke/consume is the strongest stuff they got. why fuck w/ anything less than balls out kill?
if you're gonna be a doper or a little drug addict you want the best/strongest shit around..right? or am i frickin wrong here?
no one wants bunk ass mexican commercial compressed brick ass seedy frickin stemy trash bud do they?
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
I'm pretty sure you are looking for our province's 'cash crop'. From what I know, BC is reputed to have some excellent horticulturists.
But it's part in parcel. As small any risk might be, our youth needs to be aware of all of the risks associated with anything so they might make informed decisions.
I'm not necessarily hearing a condemnation for teens smoking pot. Do we want our youth smoking dope?
now go do your algebra and report back to me
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
In this particular case, I would suggest to carry on. For some such as yourselves... no harm no foul and this is why I will not judge those that choose to use.
But let's be honest... not everyone gets the same positive experience after getting high. I know of people who struggle greatly once high: they feel a dramatic rush of anxiety, they cannot relax, they wrestle with their greatest insecurities, they misread people's intentions (paranoia), and they become introverted and tense. This experience is in contrast to those experiences they met in their early stages of drug use. These new experiences have been developed over time and very accurately represent some of the negative side effects that have been promoted by experts.
"Hear me, my chiefs!
I am tired; my heart is
sick and sad. From where
the sun stands I will fight
no more forever."
Chief Joseph - Nez Perce
or, they shouldn't smoke pot