Bring them, don't bring them, whatever. Trust me, it doesn't make you "cool mom" or "cool dad" to bring a toddler to a concert where people are behaving like- well- debauched adults.
I love how people assume that because they are Pearl Jam fans, then by right their kids will be, like somehow they might be able to bypass all of the crap that society throws at them electonically these days.
Got news for ya. Your kids will decide what THEY like, and it will have nothing to do with any memory (or lack thereof) of a concert they were too young to attend back in the day.
"If you're looking for someone to pull you out of that ditch, you're out of luck."
I can only speak for myself:
are we talking about toddlers? my daughter is 3 1/2 and she is usually in bed by 730, so its a non-starter. Not to mention the fact that the noise would frighten her and the environment isnt appropriate, IMO, for a toddler. Besides, she is more of a Grateful Dead fan (She likes Franklins Tour and Sugaree and seems to be fond of any shows from May '77). As far as live events go, we will stick with Dora the Explorer or Thomas the Train.
Sorry, but Pearl Jam shows are a family bonding time for us. My daughter's been going with me since she was 8. She is now days away from being 16, and well understood and valued the opportunity we got last night - being front row on the rail with the lottery! She's been to 22 shows with me over the years. Our show trips have provided us with many happy memories, and even if she hates me some of the time (normal for teenage years), this gets suspended on PJ show weekends and we have a blast. There are many small moments of significance from our years at PJ shows, many shared memories. Going to Pearl Jam shows with one of my daughters is something of huge significance in both our lives.
As to words, alcohol and weed, she's learned what not to do, based on seeing silly behavior from those on substance, but she's seen it with her friends too, and knows of people at her school who do those things. Its a tough world out there - you can't shield your kids from everything but you can educate them how to navigate it and make smart choices.
Each family, each child, each situation is different. There are parents who are neglectful, and inattentive, maybe unwise; there are also parents who pay attention to their childrens' needs. Taking your child to a PJ show is no different than taking them fishing, to a baseball game, ice hockey, a movie. It is natural for parents to include children in activities they love, and its natural for children to want to be there. They may grow to love what you love, or they may not - either result is okay. When I see Springsteen I go alone, because the kids aren't into it. But when PJ is coming through, they fight over my 2nd 10 club seat. (I've also got a 20 year old)
I should add that music/art is in our lives. My almost 16 year is a budding opera singer, has sung professional level chorus, as well as playing several instruments herself (guitar, viola, a little piano), and has demonstrated a love for music since before she could walk - my background is dance, and my older daughter is in visual/digital art. Music is a major part of our lives and always has been. I could no more have excluded my children from musical events even early on, than I could deny them food.
Very good post. I do not bring my children to the shows 'cuz I want to have a good time and no responsibilities but that's just me.... plus I don't want them to see me... yes, I do admit being hypocrite because I don't want them to see me drinking and behaving funny. But I do agree with your post.
Especially the bold statements.
JA: Why do I get the Ticketmaster question?
EV: It's your band.
~Q Magazine
"Kisses for the glow...kisses for the lease." - BDRII
I am granny age now and I say don't rush them growing up. Thats all I see now, elementary kids trying to be teens. They have plenty of time for rock concerts once they hit their real teens. Give them time to be a kid before they see all the negatives of the adult world. And give the parents time to be young again, like before children, reconnect with their young love and enjoy a concert just like that, hand in hand. Treat the kids to Disneyworld, thats an awesome family trip!
Bring them, don't bring them, whatever. Trust me, it doesn't make you "cool mom" or "cool dad" to bring a toddler to a concert where people are behaving like- well- debauched adults.
I love how people assume that because they are Pearl Jam fans, then by right their kids will be, like somehow they might be able to bypass all of the crap that society throws at them electonically these days.
Got news for ya. Your kids will decide what THEY like, and it will have nothing to do with any memory (or lack thereof) of a concert they were too young to attend back in the day.
It has nothing to do with my likes... I have taken them to Jonas Brothers concert too... My oldest one loves rap music... they have always loved music because we play it all the time... If they did not like it, they would not go... Both of them fight over which songs the others have heard... Who has heard more from which album, etc. etc. We also make big trips out of it... I know how much I loved the fact that my dad wanted to take me to opera when I was a kid and I learned to love and appreciate it, but he also took me to a Kiss concert because he knew I loved it...
Holding up your five year old to EV, is the new holding up your BREATH sign.
It's worse... with the Breath signs people collectively wanted to hear a song. People that run their young children to the stage are looking for personal attention and picks/tambourines/etc... its selfish because its for them and not the kids.
I am granny age now and I say don't rush them growing up. Thats all I see now, elementary kids trying to be teens. They have plenty of time for rock concerts once they hit their real teens. Give them time to be a kid before they see all the negatives of the adult world. And give the parents time to be young again, like before children, reconnect with their young love and enjoy a concert just like that, hand in hand. Treat the kids to Disneyworld, thats an awesome family trip!
How about combining a trip to Disneyland and Sea World with shows in LA and SD?
I am granny age now and I say don't rush them growing up. Thats all I see now, elementary kids trying to be teens. They have plenty of time for rock concerts once they hit their real teens. Give them time to be a kid before they see all the negatives of the adult world. And give the parents time to be young again, like before children, reconnect with their young love and enjoy a concert just like that, hand in hand. Treat the kids to Disneyworld, thats an awesome family trip!
How about combining a trip to Disneyland and Sea World with shows in LA and SD?
I am granny age now and I say don't rush them growing up. Thats all I see now, elementary kids trying to be teens. They have plenty of time for rock concerts once they hit their real teens. Give them time to be a kid before they see all the negatives of the adult world. And give the parents time to be young again, like before children, reconnect with their young love and enjoy a concert just like that, hand in hand. Treat the kids to Disneyworld, thats an awesome family trip!
How about combining a trip to Disneyland and Sea World with shows in LA and SD?
Sounds like a dynamite vacation!
October 2009... Best time ever... Kids first shows and they are hooked...
How about combining a trip to Disneyland and Sea World with shows in LA and SD?
Sounds like a dynamite vacation!
October 2009... Best time ever... Kids first shows and they are hooked...
I bet!! I know they are elementary age beautiful boys. Being a great father, you are finding this an opportunity to discuss smoking legal and otherwise, excessive drinking, super bad language(that can get them in deep _ _ _ _ at school) and other adult type stuff that goes with a concert while focusing on the great music and family bonding.
My kids took us through some rocky teen young adult times. Lots of challenges. I think hindsight I might have wished I was a bit stricter, maybe shielded them a bit more. The example you set makes all the difference. Oh and peer pressure thats a toughy to come up against. We made it to the other side though and they are great adults.
Enjoy these young years.
Bring them, don't bring them, whatever. Trust me, it doesn't make you "cool mom" or "cool dad" to bring a toddler to a concert where people are behaving like- well- debauched adults.
I love how people assume that because they are Pearl Jam fans, then by right their kids will be, like somehow they might be able to bypass all of the crap that society throws at them electonically these days.
Got news for ya. Your kids will decide what THEY like, and it will have nothing to do with any memory (or lack thereof) of a concert they were too young to attend back in the day.
It has nothing to do with my likes... I have taken them to Jonas Brothers concert too... My oldest one loves rap music... they have always loved music because we play it all the time... If they did not like it, they would not go... Both of them fight over which songs the others have heard... Who has heard more from which album, etc. etc. We also make big trips out of it... I know how much I loved the fact that my dad wanted to take me to opera when I was a kid and I learned to love and appreciate it, but he also took me to a Kiss concert because he knew I loved it...
I'm not saying don't do it- it's definitely good bonding to have the parent/ kid concert thing. I'm just saying when they are toddlers and/or too young to really get what's going on, it doesn't necessarily mean that by osmosis they will automatically love Pearl Jam just because they've been to a concert when they were like 1 or 2.
"If you're looking for someone to pull you out of that ditch, you're out of luck."
I guess I can see the point with toddler age children, more because I think the noise and crowd would scare them. Like I said in an earlier post, I turned down my son when he begged to go at age four, but I decided that he was turning six and I thought he could handle the crowd and have fun at the concert (with close supervision from me, of course). I don't like the idea of him being around adults behaving badly, but I do agree with others that it is a good teaching point. He see's his dad and I abstaining from such behavior, as well as other adults at the show (for every person behaving badly, there are probably 100 being "good"). It kind of drives home that "not everybody is doing it" point. I think if I would have been exposed to such rather than sheltered so much, maybe I would have made some different choices in my life. Also, this is on a side-note, while talking to the mothers of some of my son's friends, the subject of a Hannah Montana/ MIley Cyrus concert came up. Here they were, at what they thought was a child-friendly show, with their 5-6 year-old girls only to be shocked when Miley preceded to do a pole dance routine in skimpy clothes. Now, I haven't been to a ton of PJ shows, but I feel safe in saying that all the shows I have been to and all the dvds/youtube videos I've watched, other than a few stray curse words there has never been anything close to being that bad take place on stage at a PJ show.
So I have a big issue with the premise of this "no kids at shows" argument. I brought my freshly turned 2 year old daughter to two shows earlier this month--St louis and Indy. Indy was planned, since it was outdoors and I figured that the sound wouldn't be as loud. St louis was more of a last minute thing, as my friend that was going with ended up having surgery in the ER and my wife decided it was "ok" to bring her with. I was pretty nervous, from how she'd react to the situation(she enjoys all music, but always dances and claps to PJ), to how others would react to us bringing her. To my great surprise, noone around us--row 8, dead center, seemed to bat an eye at it. Once the show started, people started watching her on and off with the show, because she was so into it. Proper ear protection, of course--but she clapped along, danced, and had the best time. A sampling of comments from the St l fanviews follows--
The show was fantastic....the crowd around us was into it all night - some great fans in the area. One couple brought the cutest little girl who was an angel all night - gave me hopes of bringing my little guy some day.
My wife and I were 2 seats in from you. Your daughter did great and kept the ear muffs on quite nicely. Can never get my daughter to keep them on!
Also hope the little girl with the headphones did well. She looked like she was ready to rock before the show.
Indy? A bit of a different story only due to the weather. She was still perfectly behaved and between songs was either high fiving or fist pumping those around us. At 2, she seemed more into the show than a couple Ten Clubbers around us! When we left Chicago, weather only was calling for a 30% chance of rain with temps pretty warm. My wife and I weren't thrilled with how the weather and all the ticketing/parking fiascos turned out, but such is life. The show was fun, and our seats kept us covered from the weather pretty well. Was there smoke around us? Sure. But walking on the streets here, or even getting in/out of Cubs games there'll be more WITH a higher level of drunken douchebags.
And that's my point. As a parent, the best you can do is make decisions that best fit YOUR child and YOUR situation. If others around you want to get annoyed by a perfectly well behaved kid, fuck em. We had a backup plan for both shows--my wife was going to take her up to the concourse level and let her walk around, etc., so noone around us was bothered. Nor were we going to put her on our shoulders, or use her as a prop to get something from Eddie. Sure he saw us and waved to my daughter, but she was in my arms and was pretty visable. We didn't bring her to get anything special, or to annoy others. We brought her because we thought she'd enjoy it, and she did. Like I said, living here--she's been to hockey, baseball, and basketball games, and she's never been the reason anyone around us hasn't enjoyed any of those events. If you want to hate on bad parents who bring their misbehaving kids out to events like that, and not doing anything about it--fine. Just stop lumping parents of well behaved kids in with them.
"...Dimitri...He talks to me...'.."The Ghost of Greece..".
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”
I took my seven year old to the noblesville show and it was awesome! we got lawn seats (because of the sound) and went to the top of the hill so there was room for him to dance. They played everyone of his favorite songs and he sang along at the top of his lungs! Everyone we encountered hi-fived him and told him it was awesome he was there and at the end when he was wearing my extra sweatshirt he said he wanted to go again because it was the best night of his life he especialy liked mike playing star spangled banner. I wouldn't take my son to probably any other concert but to a pearl jam concert i had no fear or doubt that it would be fine....the majority of pearl jam fans are amazing and i knew they would be respectful. We arrived at 830 and it was a tad chilly but it wasn't dangerous at all... do you really think the band would come on stage if the weather was serious? What is wrong with wanting to share an amazing experience with your child......as long as the parent isn't smoking and passing out drunk then i say hell yeah everyone should be allowed to rock regardless of age!
Comments
I love how people assume that because they are Pearl Jam fans, then by right their kids will be, like somehow they might be able to bypass all of the crap that society throws at them electonically these days.
Got news for ya. Your kids will decide what THEY like, and it will have nothing to do with any memory (or lack thereof) of a concert they were too young to attend back in the day.
are we talking about toddlers? my daughter is 3 1/2 and she is usually in bed by 730, so its a non-starter. Not to mention the fact that the noise would frighten her and the environment isnt appropriate, IMO, for a toddler. Besides, she is more of a Grateful Dead fan (She likes Franklins Tour and Sugaree and seems to be fond of any shows from May '77). As far as live events go, we will stick with Dora the Explorer or Thomas the Train.
6/24/08 (MSG1)
6/25/08 (MSG2)
7/1/08 (Beacon Theater -NYC)
10/30/09 (Philly3)
5/18/10 (Newark, NJ)
5/20/10 (MSG1)
5/21/10 (MSG2)
10/18/13 (Brooklyn 1)
10/19/13 (Brooklyn 2)
5/1/16 (MSG 1)
5/2/16 (MSG 2)
3/30/20 (MSG)
9/3/24 I(MSG1)
9/4/24 (MSG 2)
Very good post. I do not bring my children to the shows 'cuz I want to have a good time and no responsibilities but that's just me.... plus I don't want them to see me... yes, I do admit being hypocrite because I don't want them to see me drinking and behaving funny.
Especially the bold statements.
EV: It's your band.
~Q Magazine
"Kisses for the glow...kisses for the lease." - BDRII
My kids took us through some rocky teen young adult times. Lots of challenges. I think hindsight I might have wished I was a bit stricter, maybe shielded them a bit more. The example you set makes all the difference. Oh and peer pressure thats a toughy to come up against. We made it to the other side though and they are great adults.
Enjoy these young years.
I'm not saying don't do it- it's definitely good bonding to have the parent/ kid concert thing. I'm just saying when they are toddlers and/or too young to really get what's going on, it doesn't necessarily mean that by osmosis they will automatically love Pearl Jam just because they've been to a concert when they were like 1 or 2.
fade away...
I am at peace with my lust.....for Eddie.
The show was fantastic....the crowd around us was into it all night - some great fans in the area. One couple brought the cutest little girl who was an angel all night - gave me hopes of bringing my little guy some day.
My wife and I were 2 seats in from you. Your daughter did great and kept the ear muffs on quite nicely. Can never get my daughter to keep them on!
Also hope the little girl with the headphones did well. She looked like she was ready to rock before the show.
Indy? A bit of a different story only due to the weather. She was still perfectly behaved and between songs was either high fiving or fist pumping those around us. At 2, she seemed more into the show than a couple Ten Clubbers around us! When we left Chicago, weather only was calling for a 30% chance of rain with temps pretty warm. My wife and I weren't thrilled with how the weather and all the ticketing/parking fiascos turned out, but such is life. The show was fun, and our seats kept us covered from the weather pretty well. Was there smoke around us? Sure. But walking on the streets here, or even getting in/out of Cubs games there'll be more WITH a higher level of drunken douchebags.
And that's my point. As a parent, the best you can do is make decisions that best fit YOUR child and YOUR situation. If others around you want to get annoyed by a perfectly well behaved kid, fuck em. We had a backup plan for both shows--my wife was going to take her up to the concourse level and let her walk around, etc., so noone around us was bothered. Nor were we going to put her on our shoulders, or use her as a prop to get something from Eddie. Sure he saw us and waved to my daughter, but she was in my arms and was pretty visable. We didn't bring her to get anything special, or to annoy others. We brought her because we thought she'd enjoy it, and she did. Like I said, living here--she's been to hockey, baseball, and basketball games, and she's never been the reason anyone around us hasn't enjoyed any of those events. If you want to hate on bad parents who bring their misbehaving kids out to events like that, and not doing anything about it--fine. Just stop lumping parents of well behaved kids in with them.
"..That's One Happy Fuckin Ghost.."
“..That came up on the Pillow Case...This is for the Greek, With Our Apologies.....”