How the hell do you get out of the friend zone?

2

Comments

  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    Anyone else notice that the guys in this thread all seem to give the same bitter advice? ;)

    Don't listen to them, OP! Just because they don't know how to get out of the friend zone doesn't mean it's not possible. :)
  • missisles
    missisles Posts: 539
    scb wrote:
    Anyone else notice that the guys in this thread all seem to give the same bitter advice? ;)

    Don't listen to them, OP! :)


    suspected jaded males that got rejected?
    makes much more sense to live in the present tense
  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    missisles wrote:
    scb wrote:
    Anyone else notice that the guys in this thread all seem to give the same bitter advice? ;)

    Don't listen to them, OP! :)


    suspected jaded males that got rejected?

    Exactly! Then they just all convince themselves that this is just the way it is and poor guys like the OP, if he believes them, are doomed from the start. And us poor women are stuck with a bunch of guys who think they have to play games.
  • missisles
    missisles Posts: 539
    scb wrote:
    missisles wrote:
    scb wrote:
    Anyone else notice that the guys in this thread all seem to give the same bitter advice? ;)

    Don't listen to them, OP! :)


    suspected jaded males that got rejected?

    Exactly! Then they just all convince themselves that this is just the way it is and poor guys like the OP, if he believes them, are doomed from the start. And us poor women are stuck with a bunch of guys who think they have to play games.

    the only games i like to play are monopoly and such
    hahahah
    :lol:

    silly boys!
    makes much more sense to live in the present tense
  • Gary Carter
    Gary Carter Posts: 14,077
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    justam wrote:
    This is so easy, contrary to what people say.

    Just be brave and kiss her when the opportunity arises. She'll let you know at that point whether she's interested or not.

    The longer you go without attempting anything, the more she'll think you're not interested in her that way.

    but i mean will that destroy my relationship with her as a friend if she rejects me?

    i'm only 18 and i don't drink or whatever but it seems that everyone who has a girlfriend got her that way because of a drunk hook-up. love these days is just all unacquainted. i hate it.

    i just want some woopie without making all these sacrifices.
    if you value her as a friend than don't make a move and just be friends. but be prepared to get rejected cause chances are that will happen.

    stay single and fuck as many as girls while you are young. also its called fucking or sex not woopie.
    Ron: I just don't feel like going out tonight
    Sammi: Wanna just break up?

  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    missisles wrote:
    the only games i like to play are monopoly and such
    hahahah
    :lol:

    silly boys!

    Exactly! Whatever happened to just being honest with one another?
  • rhcpjam1029
    rhcpjam1029 Posts: 1,982
    scb wrote:
    I'm not entirely sure what you mean by this. But if you mean that all you really want is to fuck her and you're not really interested in friendship, then pull your head out of your ass and leave the poor girl alone. Go find a prostitute; don't disrespect your friend.


    haha. no i mean that all the guys i know who are getting action right now, the assholes who treat their girlfriends like complete shit; never giving them any attention, telling them what to do when they do give it to them, pretty much just being in a relationship for ass; got their girlfriend from a drunk hook-up. i don't want to get hammered and then just hook up with a girl. i think that is just a poor excuse in order to get laid. i don't care if people say "well i'm shy" or "i just feel more comfortable when i'm drunk." you don't go to a job interview drunk just so that you'll feel more comfortable. that's the type of sacrifice i do not want to take in order to get some. it's just unnecessary to me.

    one more thing...i'm trying to get more affiliated with this girl that i volunteer with at this mentoring program. i only see her once every other week but i think she's really attractive and would like to spur some type of conversation with her so that i could start something. she's a little older than i am...but would it be weird if i just went up to her and started talking to her? how should i approach someone who i've never talked to before in that kind of environment?

    btw...as i'm typing this there's a ladybug who keeps crawling up and down my laptop screen and keyboard. symbolic?
    Beavis: All my friends are brown and red? What does that mean?
    Butthead: It means that his friends are like turds and that they like suck.
    Beavis: Heh heh. Oh yeah. Yeah! Get those spoons out of my face before I shove them up your butt!
    Butthead: Huh huh.
  • norm
    norm Posts: 31,146
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    i just want some woopie without making all these sacrifices.


    whoopi-sized.jpg


    :shock: ;)
  • SPEEDY MCCREADY
    SPEEDY MCCREADY Posts: 26,946
    You are only 18....

    Have fun...
    Date lots of girls....
    Have fun
    Date hundreds of girls......
    Have fun..........
    Date thousands of girls...................
    Have fun...........


    Most of all......
    Have fun....

    As far as the sex???
    When it happens....It happens.....

    Dont drive yourself crazy over it....
    When it happens.....It happens.................
    Take me piece by piece.....
    Till there aint nothing left worth taking away from me.....
  • missisles
    missisles Posts: 539
    why is boys get to "be young and fuck"

    but if a girl does it shes a slut or a hoe?

    and its the boys that fuck anything that move that call these girls sluts n hoes
    makes much more sense to live in the present tense
  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    metsfan wrote:
    stay single and fuck as many as girls while you are young.

    So as not to derail this thread, I started another one about this statement.
  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    missisles wrote:
    why is boys get to "be young and fuck"

    but if a girl does it shes a slut or a hoe?

    and its the boys that fuck anything that move that call these girls sluts n hoes

    I would love to know the answer to this question as well.
  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    haha. no i mean that all the guys i know who are getting action right now, the assholes who treat their girlfriends like complete shit; never giving them any attention, telling them what to do when they do give it to them, pretty much just being in a relationship for ass; got their girlfriend from a drunk hook-up. i don't want to get hammered and then just hook up with a girl. i think that is just a poor excuse in order to get laid. i don't care if people say "well i'm shy" or "i just feel more comfortable when i'm drunk." you don't go to a job interview drunk just so that you'll feel more comfortable. that's the type of sacrifice i do not want to take in order to get some. it's just unnecessary to me.

    Oh, got it. Well then I'd say you're already ahead of the game! Immature drunk fuckers are a dime a dozen, but it sounds like you are neither.

    As for the girls who date those guys, try to cut them some slack (not that you weren't already). These things are just as confusing for young women as they are for men. It takes time, maturity, and sometimes a lot of effort to learn how to respect yourself and say no when you're 18 and always the object of some horny guy's advances - especially when society tells you that that's your role.

    Also, it can be easy to find comfort and relief in your guy friends who aren't out for a piece of ass like everyone else. A guy in the "friend zone" is much more valuable than a guy you hook up with when you're drunk. It's nice to feel like there are men who you can trust, who aren't just objectifying you for their own selfish gain. Ultimately, it's the men with whom you feel safe and respected who will win your heart.
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    one more thing...i'm trying to get more affiliated with this girl that i volunteer with at this mentoring program. i only see her once every other week but i think she's really attractive and would like to spur some type of conversation with her so that i could start something. she's a little older than i am...but would it be weird if i just went up to her and started talking to her? how should i approach someone who i've never talked to before in that kind of environment?

    Wait - so this is a different girl, right?

    I don't completely understand what the environment is like, so it's hard to say for sure. If you have some reason to talk to her or something to talk about that's not completely random, then that would be ideal, especially if you've never spoken with her. Can you strike up a conversation about the program or about the people you mentor?

    Personally, I don't like to go out with people who just walk up and ask me out without knowing anything about me. So I'd try to have some kind of ongoing conversation with her to get to know her a little better first. (That will give you a better idea of whether or not she's really someone you would like to go out with.) You're lucky that you see her regularly. Can you set things up so that you work more closely with and have to interact with her for the mentoring program?
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    btw...as i'm typing this there's a ladybug who keeps crawling up and down my laptop screen and keyboard. symbolic?

    Haha! :D
  • i_lov_it
    i_lov_it Perth, Western Australia Posts: 4,007
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    this is a more of a question for girls to answer...but how can guys get out of the friend zone?

    i don't even know how i manage to get there in the first place. i just like being really nice. girls always tell me that i'm "too nice." then i look at their jackass boyfriends that treat them like such garbage and i can't even imagine compelling myself to act like that.

    i don't understand! it's like i'm doing good things for the wrong reason.

    please help. thanks.

    Because Girls DON'T like *****~~~NICE GUYS~~~*****
  • missisles
    missisles Posts: 539
    i_lov_it wrote:
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    this is a more of a question for girls to answer...but how can guys get out of the friend zone?

    i don't even know how i manage to get there in the first place. i just like being really nice. girls always tell me that i'm "too nice." then i look at their jackass boyfriends that treat them like such garbage and i can't even imagine compelling myself to act like that.

    i don't understand! it's like i'm doing good things for the wrong reason.

    please help. thanks.

    Because Girls DON'T like *****~~~NICE GUYS~~~*****


    bullshit
    makes much more sense to live in the present tense
  • Gary Carter
    Gary Carter Posts: 14,077
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:

    one more thing...i'm trying to get more affiliated with this girl that i volunteer with at this mentoring program. i only see her once every other week but i think she's really attractive and would like to spur some type of conversation with her so that i could start something. she's a little older than i am...but would it be weird if i just went up to her and started talking to her? how should i approach someone who i've never talked to before in that kind of environment?

    btw...as i'm typing this there's a ladybug who keeps crawling up and down my laptop screen and keyboard. symbolic?
    tell her a joke. girls love to laugh. it's a great icebreaker for you and her.
    Ron: I just don't feel like going out tonight
    Sammi: Wanna just break up?

  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    i_lov_it wrote:
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    this is a more of a question for girls to answer...but how can guys get out of the friend zone?

    i don't even know how i manage to get there in the first place. i just like being really nice. girls always tell me that i'm "too nice." then i look at their jackass boyfriends that treat them like such garbage and i can't even imagine compelling myself to act like that.

    i don't understand! it's like i'm doing good things for the wrong reason.

    please help. thanks.

    Because Girls DON'T like *****~~~NICE GUYS~~~*****

    That's such bullshit. It's no wonder that guys are always saying they don't understand women when they insist on holding on to these bogus ideas instead of listening to women when they try to explain themselves. It's so frustrating and I'm so sick of hearing this!!
  • brother123
    brother123 Posts: 792
    I wish I knew buddy. This woman that I work with drives me insane no matter how much we flirt, she takes it as all in good fun. Which it is but damn. . .
    <a href="http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v44/brother123/?action=view&current=thewh0.png&quot; target="_blank"><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v44/brother123/thewh0.png&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>
  • _
    _ Posts: 6,657
    metsfan wrote:
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:

    one more thing...i'm trying to get more affiliated with this girl that i volunteer with at this mentoring program. i only see her once every other week but i think she's really attractive and would like to spur some type of conversation with her so that i could start something. she's a little older than i am...but would it be weird if i just went up to her and started talking to her? how should i approach someone who i've never talked to before in that kind of environment?

    btw...as i'm typing this there's a ladybug who keeps crawling up and down my laptop screen and keyboard. symbolic?
    tell her a joke. girls love to laugh. it's a great icebreaker for you and her.

    I'm not disagreeing, but I just want to add that too many guys rely too heavily on humor with women. Sure, everyone loves to laugh. But, if you ask me, guys tend to put too much pressure on themselves to be funny.

    They also try to turn everything into a joke, especially when they don't know what to say or don't feel comfortable having a conversation with any depth. Sometimes a joke says, "Hi, I'm rhcpjam1029 and I want to talk to you but have absolutely nothing of substance to say." As an opener, it can be like just another obvious pick-up line. And then what are you going to say after the joke's done?
  • Franny
    Franny Posts: 2,054
    i_lov_it wrote:
    rhcpjam1029 wrote:
    this is a more of a question for girls to answer...but how can guys get out of the friend zone?

    i don't even know how i manage to get there in the first place. i just like being really nice. girls always tell me that i'm "too nice." then i look at their jackass boyfriends that treat them like such garbage and i can't even imagine compelling myself to act like that.

    i don't understand! it's like i'm doing good things for the wrong reason.

    please help. thanks.

    Because Girls DON'T like *****~~~NICE GUYS~~~*****


    It's not that they don't like NICE guys, it's just at 18 or so you think the sun shines out the arses of the meatheads in the football teams, and that being with one these meatheads you get to know the rest of the meatheads, and that will make you very cool! ;) (not all guys who play football are meatheads either, some can be nice people!)

    Mate, if you don't tell, she won;t know and you'll constantly wonder what if?". Suck it up, courage that is, put yourself out there, if she says yay, the great, if you get the big NO, then move on. Don't hang around, there are plenty of fish in the ocean and you've got plenty of time to go fishing!

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