Pearl Jam Parenting Thread

HeyWayne

Any room for a Brit father here?

My little boy's just 7 months old and is indeed the apple of my eye.

When people say that babies are life-changing, they don't even go halfway to explaining just what impact they have on your life. Of course there are some times when things aren't so good, but in the main - life is fantastic. In economic times such as those we have right now, having a baby makes you realise that when all's said and done, money isn't everything.

Congratulations, and welcome to the club of empty wallets, and full hearts.

Now, enough of that mushy stuff - you wait until you change your first nappy.....

Cateeto

Oh I would love to keep this thread going and welcome it to all parents! It will be nice to have a place to gather, share stories/concerns, and just get to know each other in general

Brain of J.Lo

Cateeto wrote:

Oh I definitely know that an epidural can be a realistic option for me. I'm not so good with pain and know that it's going to be a whole lot of it, so I'm reading up on it as much as possible! Today I actually watched some videos on aiding a baby with sleep, so I'm hoping that I can get a nice routine with my child sooner rather than later. I will definitely try to check that book that was suggested out too. Thanks! Tons of good suggestions and advice already!

Well, I have an interesting thing to say about my pregnancy so far. My husband and I have always wanted to be parents. Over the last year or so, we've been trying to have kids, but unsuccessfully. You see, my body has been doing some strange things for the last couple of years and basically I did not have a regular menstrual cycle and the ability to ovulate, I guess, just wasn't there. We decided to just try and see how things would go though... After a series of negative pregnancy tests, we realized that we'd have to wait and see what the doctor said was up with me and faced the fact that we'd have to probably wait a little longer to start our family. At that point we were just waiting for my husband's better insurance to kick in (he just started a new job that had Union benefits).

So anyway, we went a couple of months and waited for the insurance. Literally, the waiting drove us mad, as you can imagine... And during that time my body started to do crazier things. I started to have random spells of dizziness. That was scary. We had no idea what was wrong with me... And my tolerance of alcohol vanished entirely. I was unable to even SMELL any trace of alcohol without getting physically sick. We took that as my stomach having issues, since I've always had stomach problems. But when I started to see and feel movement in my stomach, we immediately realized that maybe this was not just my body playing tricks on me... We took a pregnancy test and I discovered I was pregnant. So in a sense, it was a planned pregnancy, but more of a planned surprise pregnancy. We were ecstatic! And lucky enough, we got our insurance just in time...

Our first doctor visit was shocking... to say the least. Not only was I feeling guilty about not knowing I was pregnant for so long, but finding out from your FIRST doctor visit that you are 28 weeks pregnant is QUITE the shocker. I nearly passed out during the ultrasound from the news... But after settling down and taking the time to realize that we had planned this from the start and that this was truly a miracle and what we've wanted, I came to and felt lucky more than anything. I have a healthy baby in me and the doctor says things couldn't be better. It was just a lot of news at once... But my husband and I have always had strange scenarios like this in life. We never really play by the rules or do the expected things... Things with us are just always entirely random, so our baby is no exception

Anyway, now you wonder, aside from my weird history with strange issues with my body, how did I NOT know I was pregnant? Well, I literally had no symptoms. The dizziness used to come to me a lot when I was a teenanger, so I never thought that could be linked to pregnancy. The inability to drink? My stomach has always rejected foods and drinks over the years... Those were literally the only signs. Nothing else. Feeling movement in my stomach was my first pregnancy sign, and actually, I didn't start showing until I was 28 weeks along. Throughout the pregnancy I actually lose weight in most of my body... Most people thought we were joking when we told them I was pregnant actually because they noticed my weight loss! But despite all of that, the baby has managed to gain the proper amount of weight and is at the ideal place she needs to be. I'm very happy about that.

Now I'm starting to get a baby belly and I'm documenting each day since I found out with photographs which I display on my facebook and in a livejournal for my friends. I also took up journaling a bit of a journal for my baby addressed entirely to her about everything I experience through pregnancy. I plan to give it to her when she's a teenager.

I haven't gone through labor yet, but I definitely have quite the tale to tell her about her beginning. You always hear about those women on those shows who never knew they were pregnant until the last minute... I was almost one of them! It's very crazy... But apparently more common than you'd think. I have another friend who found out she was pregnant at 6 months due to the same reasons as me. It's a small world, huh?

Anyway, just thought I'd share my tale with a few random strangers

Wow!!! That is a crazy story! A friend of my family's experienced the same thing, but didn't know she was pregnant until she was in labor!

That's really cool that you are documenting the pregnancy so much. I regret that I didn't do that for my daughter. She loves looking at pictures of me while I was pregnant with her, and hearing about how she "lived in my belly", so I know your daughter will appreciate this. She will especially love it when she's about to become a mom herself.

Brain of J.Lo

Cateeto wrote:

Brain of J.Lo wrote:

Congratulations!!

I have a 3 year old girl and we're gonna start working on baby #2 pretty soon...probably around Christmas! I can't wait!

Don't worry too much about labor. By the time the baby arrives, you'll be so excited to meet your kiddo, and so DONE with being pregnant, you will welcome those contractions!

As weird as it is, I think I'm really going to miss being pregnant a lot. As I wrote above, I haven't really had much time to soak in this pregnancy and pregnancy has always fascinated me the most. I love having the baby so close and feeling every little movement... Even the mean movements like squishing my ribs and bladder Pregnancy has done my body all sorts of good too... It's cured virtually all of my stomach problems I've ever had and gives me the best skin! I just feel more alive this way. I have so much energy than I'm used to. It's just so refreshing to wake up each day and know that there is a little being growing inside of me.

I have a feeling that those feelings will continue on after she's born though. I'll just miss being pregnant. It feels nice.

I had a few problems with blood pressure during pregnancy which caused me to worry a little, but other than that I felt pretty good the whole time, so I really enjoyed being pregnant. I would sit there and watch her wiggle around all day. I truly missed that right after she was born, and I can't wait to go through it all again! It really is amazing to know that there is a little person growing in there.

he still stands

I have a 12 week old boy who is still going through the colicky thing... we went from two incomes to one a few months ago... and I'm getting hardly any sleep. Our baby boy makes me so happy... but when does it get easier??? :?

Brain of J.Lo

he still stands wrote:

I have a 12 week old boy who is still going through the colicky thing... we went from two incomes to one a few months ago... and I'm getting hardly any sleep. Our baby boy makes me so happy... but when does it get easier??? :?

I had a very colicky baby and she pretty much got over that by 16 weeks. It will get MUCH easier once he's about 4 months old, I promise.

Do you have a swing? That made a huge difference in my life. My daughter took her naps in it for about the first 8 or 9 months. That can be very soothing for a colicky baby.

blackredyellow

Congrats!

We have a 20 month old son that amazes me everyday... We're starting to think about #2 now.

It's amazing how every step of their development seems like the best ever... I remember when he was a few months old not really doing anything how special it seemed... Looking back on those times now, he seemed so boring lol.

Enjoy every step and every stage, they are gone before you know it.

blackredyellow

he still stands wrote:

I have a 12 week old boy who is still going through the colicky thing... we went from two incomes to one a few months ago... and I'm getting hardly any sleep. Our baby boy makes me so happy... but when does it get easier??? :?

We did the colicky thing... after giving up on breast milk, and a couple different formulas, we eventually changed to nutramigen formula. Within a few days it was like we had a whole different baby.

It probably cost twice as much as regular formula, but it was well worth it for us... Plus our pediatrician loaded us up with any free sample cans she got.

elle elle

ALL HAIL THE BABY SWING!!!

A friend lent me her's when Jack was about 6 weeks old. It was the best thing to happen to my life I think I let him nap in there a little too long, but boy did he ever sleep. Any new parents out there...INVEST!!!

Brain of J.Lo

elle elle wrote:

ALL HAIL THE BABY SWING!!!

A friend lent me her's when Jack was about 6 weeks old. It was the best thing to happen to my life I think I let him nap in there a little too long, but boy did he ever sleep. Any new parents out there...INVEST!!!

My husband and I tell everyone we know that's even THINKING about having a baby to get a swing before you even buy anything else! It seriously changed my life. Up until we got it, I was holding the baby nonstop...could hardly put her down to go to the bathroom or take a drink. There were seriously days where I would realize at 3 pm that I hadn't had a drink or any food...

Phantom Pain

My wife and I are expecting baby number 1 in February

I'm sure this thread will come in handy !!

Brain of J.Lo

This swing rules:

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product. ... gMethod=rr

There are several different versions of it, but this is basically just like the one we had.

tacet

Under no circumstances should you ever take your child into a Wal-mart if they are screaming
uncontrollably because there are crusty old men about who will first issue you a warning to either
make your child stop or he will do it himself.

Claireack

We have a son, Hal, who is 12.

Colic was a nightmare, and unfortunately I had post natal depression which was tough. But having a child is the most fantastic thing in the world. I've loved everything about him growing up, every new phase has been as exciting for me as for him. I know the teens are coming up and it's going to be pretty tough at times, but he'll still be my boy and I'll just try and remind myself of what I was like back then.

Birth Story;

He came along a couple of weeks early, so it was a bit of a surprise. My first sign of impending birth, was waking up at 5 in the morning starving. So I got up and ate a lot. Then at about 10.30, started getting the odd twinge, so I sent my husband out to buy bread and milk (not sure why seemed sensible at the time, it was Christmas eve). By about three, was really getting uncomfortable so I phoned the midwife, she told me I wasn't in labour, it was too early, it was probably practice contractions and to take a bath. Took a bath and decided that if this was a practice run the baby could stay in there. At about 5 decided I better get checked out. Yes, I was in labour. Strapped on the tens machine and went home for a bit. Tried between contractions to eat a bit of tea, my friend arrived, as my husband said he wasn't going to stay til the very end.

About 8 decided I probably better get back to the hospital and it was getting quite painful. My waters still hadn't broken and no show of any description. About 9 o'clock the midwife said would I like to try gas & air to help with the pain. Tried it and didn't like it much so said no thank you. Watched a bit of tv. About 10.30 decided the gas and air wasn't too bad after all and would give it another go. After this wouldn't let anybody remove it from my face and my tens machine was permanently on boost. 11ish went into the delivery room, managed to get on all fours and press the gas and air mask against the head of the bed so I didn't have to hold it. Obviously wasn't such a good move as I then thought I was alternatively in a space invader game or at work. Had given up on the tens machine as it now wasn't having any effect on the pain. At about 12 changed my mind and decided I wasn't going to have the baby and wanted to go home - they wouldn't let me. The next couple of hours were really tough, I think I yelled quite a lot and unfortunately bit my friends hand. At some point my husband nipped out for a smoke of something to calm him down. After much pushing at 2.07 on Christmas morning out popped my baby boy, with my friend and my husband present.

When my husband held him for the first time, looked at him and said how handsome was was probably one of the most wonderful moments of my life.

The thing is with the labour/birth is that yes, it is bloody painful, but it's just one day and as soon as the baby pops out the pain stops. It was only the last 20 minutes that I really wanted something more for the pain and by then it was too late. Keep your options for pain relief open, don't commit to anything that needs to be set in stone. I felt like my body went into autopilot and just went along with what ever it was doing. I am not a calm person, I don't like pain, but I got through it and got the best christmas present ever!!!

Good luck with it all - not long now!!

Cateeto

Okay parents... I have a baby shower that my family has planned to throw me on October 3rd. I'm no good at making registries at all... I have quite a few items on there, but I'm lost in terms of the essentials. Also, I don't know how much is too much to put on the registry or the way that works. There are so many rules to follow as far as showers go, I'm discovering, and I'm really lost!

What products have improved your life with your baby?

I'm going to be a stay at home mother and try to exclusively breastfeed, so I'm putting a manual breast pump on my registry and I plan to use the Moby wrap a lot. I hear nothing but good reviews on that one. Also, I'm thinking about buying a kit to make my own baby food. I hear you can save tons of money on that.

We should totally share pictures of our kids on here or our pregnant bellies too. Are we able to post photos directly to the board now? I'm afraid there is a lot of catching up to do as far as this board goes for me :?

Cateeto

Brain of J.Lo wrote:

elle elle wrote:

ALL HAIL THE BABY SWING!!!

A friend lent me her's when Jack was about 6 weeks old. It was the best thing to happen to my life I think I let him nap in there a little too long, but boy did he ever sleep. Any new parents out there...INVEST!!!

My husband and I tell everyone we know that's even THINKING about having a baby to get a swing before you even buy anything else! It seriously changed my life. Up until we got it, I was holding the baby nonstop...could hardly put her down to go to the bathroom or take a drink. There were seriously days where I would realize at 3 pm that I hadn't had a drink or any food...

Funny you mention the swing... That was the FIRST baby item I insisted on getting when we found out I was pregnant. I have a handful of nieces and nephews that I've helped take care over the years and my god is that thing a godsend! It will hush the baby nearly every time! I was so ecstatic when we got the swing. I just knew it would probably help me with so many things in the near future.

Cateeto

Phantom Pain wrote:

My wife and I are expecting baby number 1 in February

I'm sure this thread will come in handy !!

Oooooh congrats to you! Make sure you give you wife all sorts of pampering! It's crazy expecting your first, isn't it? Literally, the day you find out you're going to be a parent, you look at EVERYTHING differently. And I don't know about you, but my mind doesn't stop with the thoughts of my infant.

Drowned Out

Cateeto wrote:

Thanks for all of the congrats guys! I'm quite excited about being a mom

Dads are welcome too for sure! It's nice to hear from both parents. Seems as though we have quite a few of you in the crowd...

Any interesting birth stories out there? I'm going to be 8 months pregnant on Wednesday so my child's arrival is very soon. Needless to say, I'm quite freaked out about the labor and birth, but also fascinated by the story is may provide. Maybe I'll have a Thanksgiving baby or something

Congrats Cateeto
I have two kids - a 6 year old girl and a boy that will be 4 in a couple weeks.

My daughters' birth was quite the dramatic event....she was way overdue so my ex was induced...after 14 hrs and very little change, they decided it was becoming too stressful on the baby so they tried the forceps...this did nothing but give my girl brutal cuts/friction burns on her face ( :( )....so, emergency c-section it was....
When they began the incision, my ex screamed that she could feel them cutting....so the anesthesiologist (is that the title? ) pulls out this big-ass syringe...I ask what it is and he tells me Ketamine....I say, "like...K? the street drug?" which made the whole OR start laughing....they gave it to her and she was instantly 100% out of it....her eyes rolled back and her jaw locked in an open position.....at that point, they made me leave the room. But they basically pushed me out the door by myself without explanation....so I stood there panicking for about 10 minutes (seemed like a lifetime) before I heard a baby cry and they came to get me.
Everything turned out alright...the marks from the forceps healed fully, mom recovered nicely, and our girl was healthy and happy Mom missed out on the first feeding and bath since she was stoned out of her mind, but other than that, it was all good.
Hope yours goes much more smoothly ....and sorry if I freaked you out

blackredyellow

Cateeto wrote:

Okay parents... I have a baby shower that my family has planned to throw me on October 3rd. I'm no good at making registries at all... I have quite a few items on there, but I'm lost in terms of the essentials. Also, I don't know how much is too much to put on the registry or the way that works. There are so many rules to follow as far as showers go, I'm discovering, and I'm really lost!

What products have improved your life with your baby?

I'm going to be a stay at home mother and try to exclusively breastfeed, so I'm putting a manual breast pump on my registry and I plan to use the Moby wrap a lot. I hear nothing but good reviews on that one. Also, I'm thinking about buying a kit to make my own baby food. I hear you can save tons of money on that.

We should totally share pictures of our kids on here or our pregnant bellies too. Are we able to post photos directly to the board now? I'm afraid there is a lot of catching up to do as far as this board goes for me :?

I can only speak from our experience with our one child, so chances are you will get some conflicting info, but...

The biggest waste of money that we got as a present (which we registered for) was a big stroller... I forget the brand, but it was one of those sets where you get the car seat carrier thing that snaps into the base and comes with a stroller that it snaps in to. We used the carrier/base all of the time, but probably used that stroller 10 times. We usually just carried the carrier thing, and when he was a little older we got a cheap $20 umbrella stroller which we used a lot. That big one took up most of the trunk when folded, so we hardly took it anywhere.

And I don't know about a manual breast pump, maybe some women had luck with it, but I can tell you after being sleep deprived and everything else, the last think that my wife would have wanted to do was to manually pump... we splurged on a power one and that was probably the one thing that kept my wife from quitting breastfeeding.

Drowned Out

blackredyellow wrote:

I can only speak from our experience with our one child, so chances are you will get some conflicting info, but...

The biggest waste of money that we got as a present (which we registered for) was a big stroller... I forget the brand, but it was one of those sets where you get the car seat carrier thing that snaps into the base and comes with a stroller that it snaps in to. We used the carrier/base all of the time, but probably used that stroller 10 times. We usually just carried the carrier thing, and when he was a little older we got a cheap $20 umbrella stroller which we used a lot. That big one took up most of the trunk when folded, so we hardly took it anywhere.

And I don't know about a manual breast pump, maybe some women had luck with it, but I can tell you after being sleep deprived and everything else, the last think that my wife would have wanted to do was to manually pump... we splurged on a power one and that was probably the one thing that kept my wife from quitting breastfeeding.

Totally agree on the big stroller....
As for the electric pump....not sure where you are Cateeto....and this sounds kinda weird... but Shopper's Drug Mart (in Canada) rents them out... if you don't plan to breast feed for years, might be worth looking into renting...
Just hold on tight the first time you use it. The first time my ex turned it on while attached to her breast was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.