8/28/98- Camden, NJ
10/31/09- Philly
5/21/10- NYC
9/2/12- Philly, PA
7/19/13- Wrigley
10/19/13- Brooklyn, NY
10/21/13- Philly, PA
10/22/13- Philly, PA
10/27/13- Baltimore, MD
Tres Mts.- 3/23/11- Philly
Eddie Vedder- 6/25/11- Philly
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hedonist
standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
pinot - agreed, very much so.
The bump is apropos given the timeline from the initial post to now. Seems most ARE about image, and "look at me!". Perhaps not their own image of themselves, but how others' opinions form it, influence it? How some want to be seen?
If, when looking in a mirror, all you can see is the physical...you might be missing out on the most valuable parts of yourself.
Comes down mostly to the eyes, ironically - they see, but also reflect. Looking into your own eyes (plus those of others) can be quite, well, eye-opening.
"To be yourself is all that you can do" - and be open to change, improvement, know the difference between the sincere and the sycophants.
We all fuck up, sometime royally. Just try to learn from that shit and be a decent person.
I've had this in my home since the time I bought my home - a gift from my father, and quite perfect. It keeps my sometimes-skewed views of myself in perspective.
I can honestly say, even the phrase "self image" is anathema to me. It seems so solipsistic. I'll have a bath and brush my teeth, and change my underpants and socks, but hygiene aside, I don't give a shite about stuff like image.
+1
Same here, although I do sometimes think about how other people are perceiving me. My self-image is just fine.... are other people fine with my image?? I dunno! It's not so much that I care if they aren't, but more like I wish I could see myself through other people's eyes to see if my view and theirs are similar or WAY off. I guess I find the idea that others' perceptions of me and my perception of myself being completely different a little bit unsettling. If they are very different, wouldn't that mean that nobody gets me? But yeah, if I'm just talking about how I feel when I look at myself in the mirror, I feel fine because I really don't give a crap. I am just me, and I'm not trying to create an image to make myself anything else; it's all superficial assuming hygiene is kept up and as long as I stay polite enough to fit my appearance to the appropriate occasions (i.e. don't show up to someone's wedding in sweat pants, lol).
With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy. ~ Desiderata
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brianlux
Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,725
I'm not all that worried about the image in the mirror. I do the best I can and then get on with they day. Since I hit my mid 60's though, sometimes I get up in the AM, go to pee, see myself walking by the mirror and think, good lord man, you look like shit.
I'm more self aware about how I present myself in terms of personality. I always feel like I could do better.
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
Variously credited to Mark Twain or Edward Abbey.
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curmudgeoness
Brigadoon, foodie capital Posts: 3,254
I'm also wondering what the OP meant by "self-image." I'm pretty happy with myself as a human being; there's always room to improve, but I make an effort to do the right thing. If we're talking about appearance, that's another matter.
I would like to be valued for my personality and whatever abilities I have, but, as a woman, I feel as if my value is more closely tied to my appearance. I've never been pretty. My husband disagrees on that point, but I've had enough men stop me on the street to tell me how ugly I am that I know I am, let's say, an acquired taste. I'd like to be able to not give a rat's ass about that; it's not my job to look pretty for you, after all. But it's an uphill battle.
All those who seek to destroy the liberties of a democratic nation ought to know that war is the surest and shortest means to accomplish it.
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brianlux
Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,725
I'm also wondering what the OP meant by "self-image." I'm pretty happy with myself as a human being; there's always room to improve, but I make an effort to do the right thing. If we're talking about appearance, that's another matter.
I would like to be valued for my personality and whatever abilities I have, but, as a woman, I feel as if my value is more closely tied to my appearance. I've never been pretty. My husband disagrees on that point, but I've had enough men stop me on the street to tell me how ugly I am that I know I am, let's say, an acquired taste. I'd like to be able to not give a rat's ass about that; it's not my job to look pretty for you, after all. But it's an uphill battle.
Any guy who would say something to you even remotely close to that is less than a piece of dirt. They are the ugly ones, by far.
My wife sometimes makes comments like, "You didn't marry me for my looks". She may not "qualify" for some stupid glam magazine cover but so what! I think she's beautiful and she has a beautiful soul and I'm a very lucky man. I'm glad your husband is the good guy he is to acknowledge you own beauty. Good man!
"Beauty" is so distorted by our culture and media any way. We're all better off not buying into that nonsense. Our culture says you have to be young and skinny to be beautiful. Well, that may be so in some cases, but what a ridiculous, narrow-minded gauge of beauty. There is beauty in all types of people, men and women of all shapes, ages, races, and colors.
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
I'm also wondering what the OP meant by "self-image." I'm pretty happy with myself as a human being; there's always room to improve, but I make an effort to do the right thing. If we're talking about appearance, that's another matter.
I would like to be valued for my personality and whatever abilities I have, but, as a woman, I feel as if my value is more closely tied to my appearance. I've never been pretty. My husband disagrees on that point, but I've had enough men stop me on the street to tell me how ugly I am that I know I am, let's say, an acquired taste. I'd like to be able to not give a rat's ass about that; it's not my job to look pretty for you, after all. But it's an uphill battle.
Any guy who would say something to you even remotely close to that is less than a piece of dirt. They are the ugly ones, by far.
My wife sometimes makes comments like, "You didn't marry me for my looks". She may not "qualify" for some stupid glam magazine cover but so what! I think she's beautiful and she has a beautiful soul and I'm a very lucky man. I'm glad your husband is the good guy he is to acknowledge you own beauty. Good man!
"Beauty" is so distorted by our culture and media any way. We're all better off not buying into that nonsense. Our culture says you have to be young and skinny to be beautiful. Well, that may be so in some cases, but what a ridiculous, narrow-minded gauge of beauty. There is beauty in all types of people, men and women of all shapes, ages, races, and colors.
Thank you, Brian. You sound like a pretty good man, yourself. [And, yes, I married well. :-) ]
All those who seek to destroy the liberties of a democratic nation ought to know that war is the surest and shortest means to accomplish it.
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brianlux
Moving through All Kinds of Terrain. Posts: 40,725
I'm also wondering what the OP meant by "self-image." I'm pretty happy with myself as a human being; there's always room to improve, but I make an effort to do the right thing. If we're talking about appearance, that's another matter.
I would like to be valued for my personality and whatever abilities I have, but, as a woman, I feel as if my value is more closely tied to my appearance. I've never been pretty. My husband disagrees on that point, but I've had enough men stop me on the street to tell me how ugly I am that I know I am, let's say, an acquired taste. I'd like to be able to not give a rat's ass about that; it's not my job to look pretty for you, after all. But it's an uphill battle.
Any guy who would say something to you even remotely close to that is less than a piece of dirt. They are the ugly ones, by far.
My wife sometimes makes comments like, "You didn't marry me for my looks". She may not "qualify" for some stupid glam magazine cover but so what! I think she's beautiful and she has a beautiful soul and I'm a very lucky man. I'm glad your husband is the good guy he is to acknowledge you own beauty. Good man!
"Beauty" is so distorted by our culture and media any way. We're all better off not buying into that nonsense. Our culture says you have to be young and skinny to be beautiful. Well, that may be so in some cases, but what a ridiculous, narrow-minded gauge of beauty. There is beauty in all types of people, men and women of all shapes, ages, races, and colors.
Thank you, Brian. You sound like a pretty good man, yourself. [And, yes, I married well. :-) ]
Excellent!
“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man [or woman] who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
Comments
Do you mean "Are you happy with the way you look?" or do you mean "Do you think you appear the way you feel?"
What question are you really asking? :geek:
i'd settle for 1 way!!
8/28/98- Camden, NJ
10/31/09- Philly
5/21/10- NYC
9/2/12- Philly, PA
7/19/13- Wrigley
10/19/13- Brooklyn, NY
10/21/13- Philly, PA
10/22/13- Philly, PA
10/27/13- Baltimore, MD
Tres Mts.- 3/23/11- Philly
Eddie Vedder- 6/25/11- Philly
The bump is apropos given the timeline from the initial post to now. Seems most ARE about image, and "look at me!". Perhaps not their own image of themselves, but how others' opinions form it, influence it? How some want to be seen?
If, when looking in a mirror, all you can see is the physical...you might be missing out on the most valuable parts of yourself.
Comes down mostly to the eyes, ironically - they see, but also reflect. Looking into your own eyes (plus those of others) can be quite, well, eye-opening.
"To be yourself is all that you can do" - and be open to change, improvement, know the difference between the sincere and the sycophants.
We all fuck up, sometime royally. Just try to learn from that shit and be a decent person.
I've had this in my home since the time I bought my home - a gift from my father, and quite perfect. It keeps my sometimes-skewed views of myself in perspective.
I'm more self aware about how I present myself in terms of personality. I always feel like I could do better.
I would like to be valued for my personality and whatever abilities I have, but, as a woman, I feel as if my value is more closely tied to my appearance. I've never been pretty. My husband disagrees on that point, but I've had enough men stop me on the street to tell me how ugly I am that I know I am, let's say, an acquired taste. I'd like to be able to not give a rat's ass about that; it's not my job to look pretty for you, after all. But it's an uphill battle.
My wife sometimes makes comments like, "You didn't marry me for my looks". She may not "qualify" for some stupid glam magazine cover but so what! I think she's beautiful and she has a beautiful soul and I'm a very lucky man. I'm glad your husband is the good guy he is to acknowledge you own beauty. Good man!
"Beauty" is so distorted by our culture and media any way. We're all better off not buying into that nonsense. Our culture says you have to be young and skinny to be beautiful. Well, that may be so in some cases, but what a ridiculous, narrow-minded gauge of beauty. There is beauty in all types of people, men and women of all shapes, ages, races, and colors.
Thank you, Brian. You sound like a pretty good man, yourself. [And, yes, I married well. :-) ]
*pats head*