Who likes bad jokes?

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Comments

  • EddiEEddiE Posts: 125
    I used to be a free lance journalist....

    ...but I was crap...



    .....Lance is still in prison....
    Paris 7/11/96
    Manchester 4/6/00
  • RygarRygar Posts: 8,685
    EddiE wrote:
    I used to be a free lance journalist....

    ...but I was crap...



    .....Lance is still in prison....
    Bahahahaha!
  • A Scottish fella is in his bedroom, getting himself off into one of his wife's boots.

    She bursts in and says, [thick Scottish accent]"Stop fuckin' aboot!"
  • RygarRygar Posts: 8,685
    A Scottish fella is in his bedroom, getting himself off into one of his wife's boots.

    She bursts in and says, [thick Scottish accent]"Stop fuckin' aboot!"
    I see you've been to Dunk's house.
  • LizardLizard Posts: 12,091
    did you hear about the cat that backed into a plane propeller?

    Yep

    Dis-assed-her!!!



    (what a CATastrophe!!!) :p
    So I'll just lie down and wait for the dream
    Where I'm not ugly and you're lookin' at me
  • SnakeSnake Posts: 2,605
    Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff... Ba-dum chhh!!!

    (imagine the sound of two drums and a cymbal for added effects)
    Pirates had democracy too.

    "Its a secret to everybody."
  • JD SalJD Sal Posts: 790
    Ponderous Notions

    If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

    What was the best thing before sliced bread?

    Do blind Eskimos have seeing-eye sled dogs?

    If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?

    Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

    Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

    What do they use to ship styrofoam?
    "If no one sees you, you're not here at all"
  • restlesssoulrestlesssoul Posts: 6,951
    Billy is in class and the teachers says, does anybody have anything interesting that happened to them lately?? Billy raises his hand and tells the story:

    "I was walking to school today and I saw a guy riding a bike with no seat, he hit a speed bump and the pole went right up his ASS!!!!"

    the teachers corrects him: "Rectum, Billy."


    "Rectum? Damn near killed him!!!!!""





    BEST PUNCHLINE EVER!
    Van '98, Sea I+II '00, Sea '01, Sea II '02, Van '03, Gorge, Van, Cal, Edm '05, Bos I+II, Phi I+II, DC, SF II+III, Port, Gorge I+II '06, DC, NY I+II '08, Sea I+II, Van, Ridge , LA III+IV' 09, Indy '10, Cal, Van '11, Lond, Van, Sea '13, Memphis '14, RRHOF '17, Sea I+II '18, Van I+II, Vegas I+II '24
  • Hitch-HikerHitch-Hiker Posts: 2,873
    Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

    Fo' drizzle!


    :D:D:D
    I'll Ride The Wave Where It Takes Me
  • pearljamjenpearljamjen Posts: 13,578
    Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

    Fo' drizzle!


    :D:D:D

    bahahahaa! That is cheesy and funny! :D

    Good one Neil :D
  • Hitch-HikerHitch-Hiker Posts: 2,873
    bahahahaa! That is cheesy and funny! :D

    Good one Neil :D
    thanks, lol :D

    Got a few more:

    Q: Why is milk so fast?
    A: Because it's pasteurised before you see it!!

    Q: Why do mice have small ballls?
    A: Cos not that many know how to dance.

    Two nuns riding down a cobbled street on their bikes. One turns to the other and says 'I've never come this way before'

    Q: What do you call a man with no arms & no legs sitting on a beach?
    A: Matt

    Did you hear about the nobel prize winning farmer?
    He was outstanding in his field

    Did you hear about the magic tractor?
    It turned into a field
    :D

    Thankyou! I'm here all week :p
    I'll Ride The Wave Where It Takes Me
  • brainofPJbrainofPJ Posts: 2,361
    an elderly asian woman goes for an eye exam...

    the doc comes out with the results...

    "well it looks like you have a cataract ma'am"


    elderly asian woman:

    "no no, i dwive a cutwas"


    Esther's here and she's sick?

    hi Esther, now we are all going to be sick, thanks
  • Billy is in class and the teachers says, does anybody have anything interesting that happened to them lately?? Billy raises his hand and tells the story:

    "I was walking to school today and I saw a guy riding a bike with no seat, he hit a speed bump and the pole went right up his ASS!!!!"

    the teachers corrects him: "Rectum, Billy."


    "Rectum? Damn near killed him!!!!!""





    BEST PUNCHLINE EVER!

    dont even need the joke......just the punchline
    If a man speaks in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
  • Do you have any pictures of your girlfriend naked?





    wanna buy some?
    If a man speaks in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
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