That's what I think too. She has no support from family, not even her parents or husband because they're Mormon and blame rape as the woman's fault. At least that's what they've taught her all her life. So, I'm seeking any resource I can find so that she can at least see a therapist immediately. Already took her to psychiatrist today. Of course she refused to disclose. My heart is just broken but I'll find her help somehow. And can I just add that the health care system and beaurocratic bullshit in this country suck!!!
Sorry for the heavy subject but I'm curious on people's opinions.... Here's the scenario: Woman spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two. He suggests stopping at a playground along the way. They lay down on the slide, continue kissing, as he tries to pull her pants off. She says no three times but then blacks out somewhat and the deed is done. Who considers that rape?
IT IS RAPE. non consensual sex no matter how wasted you are is RAPE. this guy had sex with an unconscious person, hes a slimebag.
hear my name
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
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hedonist
standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
And..."bite that"?
Please shelve the rudeness.
Venting about witnessing a rape? - report it other places that can help like the authorities.
Shelving the rudeness? Perhaps a poster can stop using the word bite in response to a post by me like I am a troll. This is serious.
And as for you saying this was rape, asked and answered you have a duty as well to bring this higher.
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hedonist
standing on the edge of forever Posts: 24,524
Venting about going through this, not witnessing. Pretty sure if it was seen it would've been stopped.
And you know damn well that "I'll bite" was in no way meant as "bite me" or "bite that".
Consider the source too. I tend to do that when weighing the sincerity (or lack thereof) in the posts of some.
How about leaving the sense of doody (ha, I kill myself sometimes) duty aside. Maybe some compassion for what the OP is trying to navigate?
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
And..."bite that"?
Please shelve the rudeness.
Venting about witnessing a rape? - report it other places that can help like the authorities.
Shelving the rudeness? Perhaps a poster can stop using the word bite in response to a post by me like I am a troll. This is serious.
And as for you saying this was rape, asked and answered you have a duty as well to bring this higher.
Would that be a moral or a legal duty? I'm not sure that you've made that point clear yet.
my small self... like a book amongst the many on a shelf
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
^^^ If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck. Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not. Bite that.
Damn, man...really?
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
And..."bite that"?
Please shelve the rudeness.
Venting about witnessing a rape? - report it other places that can help like the authorities.
Shelving the rudeness? Perhaps a poster can stop using the word bite in response to a post by me like I am a troll. This is serious.
And as for you saying this was rape, asked and answered you have a duty as well to bring this higher.
She/they did not witness the rape. She was told about it later. I don't know that it makes a difference for you. Just thought you might want to know that. The OP and her husband DID NOT see the rape in action and walk away.
That's what I think too. She has no support from family, not even her parents or husband because they're Mormon and blame rape as the woman's fault. At least that's what they've taught her all her life. So, I'm seeking any resource I can find so that she can at least see a therapist immediately. Already took her to psychiatrist today. Of course she refused to disclose. My heart is just broken but I'll find her help somehow. And can I just add that the health care system and beaurocratic bullshit in this country suck!!!
She's married?? Irrelevant in regards to being raped but im just trying to understand the story better.
That's what I think too. She has no support from family, not even her parents or husband because they're Mormon and blame rape as the woman's fault. At least that's what they've taught her all her life. So, I'm seeking any resource I can find so that she can at least see a therapist immediately. Already took her to psychiatrist today. Of course she refused to disclose. My heart is just broken but I'll find her help somehow. And can I just add that the health care system and beaurocratic bullshit in this country suck!!!
She's married?? Irrelevant in regards to being raped but im just trying to understand the story better.
It's relevant in that if her husband won't support her after being raped she needs to find a better one! But I guess that is a whole other issue, she is obviously very lucky to have OP as a friend!
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
Regardless of why she was out with the guy, rape is rape. The premise is strictly between her and her husband and warrants no excuse for the alleged crime.
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
And occasionally people have open marriages. Still doesn't defend rape.
Regardless of why she was out with the guy, rape is rape. The premise is strictly between her and her husband and warrants no excuse for the alleged crime.
I acknowledged the same. I'm just pointing out the fact that if I was the husband... I wouldn't be too pleased she was out smooching guys at the bar. Maybe I'm old fashioned? Maybe this is acceptable conduct for marriage these days? It isn't in our household.
I don't think it's a deal breaker, but it's a kick to the nuts for the husband- he's dealing with the rape and he's dealing with behaviour that isn't ideal (unless, as I said, that's cool in America).
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
And occasionally people have open marriages. Still doesn't defend rape.
Regardless of why she was out with the guy, rape is rape. The premise is strictly between her and her husband and warrants no excuse for the alleged crime.
I acknowledged the same. I'm just pointing out the fact that if I was the husband... I wouldn't be too pleased she was out smooching guys at the bar. Maybe I'm old fashioned? Maybe this is acceptable conduct for marriage these days? It isn't in our household.
I don't think it's a deal breaker, but it's a kick to the nuts for the husband- he's dealing with the rape and he's dealing with behaviour that isn't ideal (unless, as I said, that's cool in America).
The circumstances seem a bit confusing, I agree. I hope everything will solve for everyone in best way possible. And that the rapist get his punishment.
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
And occasionally people have open marriages. Still doesn't defend rape.
I never defended rape. Read more carefully.
I never said that you did. Didn't mean it that way. Apologies to you.
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
And occasionally people have open marriages. Still doesn't defend rape.
I never defended rape. Read more carefully.
I never said that you did. Didn't mean it that way. Apologies to you.
No worries, DEP. Everything's a fucking argument with those frequent AMT posters.
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
And occasionally people have open marriages. Still doesn't defend rape.
I never defended rape. Read more carefully.
I never said that you did. Didn't mean it that way. Apologies to you.
No worries, DEP. Everything's a fucking argument with those frequent AMT posters.
You saw this as an argument? I saw it as clarification. You know... people communicating in written language in the hopes of better understanding.
It's kind of relevant in that she was flirting and cozying up to some shitbird.
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
And occasionally people have open marriages. Still doesn't defend rape.
I never defended rape. Read more carefully.
I never said that you did. Didn't mean it that way. Apologies to you.
All good. No apology necessary. Just wanted to make sure you knew I wasn't condoning the act of rape given a possible minor indiscretion on the part of the victim prior to the event.
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http://www.reverbnation.com/brianzilm
So, I'm seeking any resource I can find so that she can at least see a therapist immediately. Already took her to psychiatrist today. Of course she refused to disclose.
My heart is just broken but I'll find her help somehow.
And can I just add that the health care system and beaurocratic bullshit in this country suck!!!
thought about going to the police?
www.cluthelee.com
www.cluthe.com
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
It is now your duty to report this.
take a good look
this could be the day
hold my hand
lie beside me
i just need to say
Are you arguing for legal or for moral duty? In either event, state your case. This is not the thread to troll in.
If the OP is suggesting they witnessed a duck they should report a duck.
Not the thread to troll in? It is a thread asking if what they know of is rape or not.
Bite that.
It's pretty clear this was rape. Asked, answered.
Not so much about what obligation the OP has - if any - though she's done (and is doing) much to try and help. Maybe venting here in the process. OK by me.
And..."bite that"?
Please shelve the rudeness.
Shelving the rudeness? Perhaps a poster can stop using the word bite in response to a post by me like I am a troll.
This is serious.
And as for you saying this was rape, asked and answered you have a duty as well to bring this higher.
Venting about going through this, not witnessing. Pretty sure if it was seen it would've been stopped.
And you know damn well that "I'll bite" was in no way meant as "bite me" or "bite that".
Consider the source too. I tend to do that when weighing the sincerity (or lack thereof) in the posts of some.
How about leaving the sense of
doody(ha, I kill myself sometimes) duty aside. Maybe some compassion for what the OP is trying to navigate?Fair enough and I hope the OP finds comfort from this thread.
Doodie, indeed.
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
It's still rape, but if I'm the husband... I don't think I'm pleased that she "spends a night at a bar with a guy having a good time. She says it's time to go home and he offers to walk her. She's being flirty and they share a kiss or two."
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
I don't think it's a deal breaker, but it's a kick to the nuts for the husband- he's dealing with the rape and he's dealing with behaviour that isn't ideal (unless, as I said, that's cool in America).
2016: Lexington and Wrigley 1
Nice judgement though.
I'm still up for slapping the guy.