Post your best "Dad" Joke

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Comments

  • JOEJOEJOE
    JOEJOEJOE Posts: 10,964
    A lawyer went to the dentist to pick up his retainer.........
  • mookieblalock
    mookieblalock Posts: 3,619
    When does a joke become a dad joke?

    when it’s apparent. 
  • Get_Right
    Get_Right Posts: 14,717
    What does a yellow light meant? Slow down. W h a t  d o e s  a  y e l l o w  l i g h t  m e a n? Infamous Taxi bit, but famous in my house as a dad joke.
  • Johnny Abruzzo
    Johnny Abruzzo Philly Posts: 12,739
    Get_Right said:
    What does a yellow light meant? Slow down. W h a t  d o e s  a  y e l l o w  l i g h t  m e a n? Infamous Taxi bit, but famous in my house as a dad joke.
    more like whatdoesayellowlightmean!!!

    Why did Taylor Swift send back her breakfast in Ireland? Bad Blood Sausage.
    Spectrum 10/27/09; New Orleans JazzFest 5/1/10; Made in America 9/2/12; Phila, PA 10/21/13; Phila,  PA 10/22/13; Baltimore Arena 10/27/13; Phila, PA 4/28/16; Phila, PA 4/29/16; Fenway Park 8/7/16; Fenway Park 9/2/18; Asbury Park 9/18/21; Camden 9/14/22; Las Vegas 5/16/24; Las Vegas 5/18/24; Phila, PA 9/7/24; Phila, PA 9/9/24; Baltimore Arena 9/12/24; Pittsburgh 5/16/25; Pittsburgh 5/18/25

    Tres Mtns - TLA 3/23/11; EV - Tower Theatre 6/25/11; Temple of the Dog - Tower Theatre 11/5/16
  • CarryTheZero
    CarryTheZero Posts: 3,767
    How do you know a bad drummer is at the door?

    The knock speeds up.
  • crookedcross
    crookedcross Posts: 1,562
    If my kids refuse to take naps...
    Can I turn 'em in for resisting arest?
  • Johnny Abruzzo
    Johnny Abruzzo Philly Posts: 12,739
    What does the mob do on Presidents Day?

    They go to the mattresses!  
    Spectrum 10/27/09; New Orleans JazzFest 5/1/10; Made in America 9/2/12; Phila, PA 10/21/13; Phila,  PA 10/22/13; Baltimore Arena 10/27/13; Phila, PA 4/28/16; Phila, PA 4/29/16; Fenway Park 8/7/16; Fenway Park 9/2/18; Asbury Park 9/18/21; Camden 9/14/22; Las Vegas 5/16/24; Las Vegas 5/18/24; Phila, PA 9/7/24; Phila, PA 9/9/24; Baltimore Arena 9/12/24; Pittsburgh 5/16/25; Pittsburgh 5/18/25

    Tres Mtns - TLA 3/23/11; EV - Tower Theatre 6/25/11; Temple of the Dog - Tower Theatre 11/5/16
  • Johnny Abruzzo
    Johnny Abruzzo Philly Posts: 12,739
    What did the square roots of -1 say to each other?

    It’s been imaginary. 
    Spectrum 10/27/09; New Orleans JazzFest 5/1/10; Made in America 9/2/12; Phila, PA 10/21/13; Phila,  PA 10/22/13; Baltimore Arena 10/27/13; Phila, PA 4/28/16; Phila, PA 4/29/16; Fenway Park 8/7/16; Fenway Park 9/2/18; Asbury Park 9/18/21; Camden 9/14/22; Las Vegas 5/16/24; Las Vegas 5/18/24; Phila, PA 9/7/24; Phila, PA 9/9/24; Baltimore Arena 9/12/24; Pittsburgh 5/16/25; Pittsburgh 5/18/25

    Tres Mtns - TLA 3/23/11; EV - Tower Theatre 6/25/11; Temple of the Dog - Tower Theatre 11/5/16
  • Velvet Jones
    Velvet Jones Posts: 160
    What did the drummer names his twin girls?

    Anna 1, Anna 2
  • Velvet Jones
    Velvet Jones Posts: 160
    What you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

    Elephino.... as in Hell-if-i-know  

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