Better Man

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  • Jeanie
    Jeanie Posts: 9,446
    catefrances wrote:
    when she practises her speeches. that is the speech she will use to get away from him. when she decides she's really had enough. but in the end she can't get away she doesn't have the strength. she doesn't feel she is worthy of someone better. she just practices the speech but never says it to him.
    and no you don't change yourself so you 'don't set him off'. you get the fuck out of there. cause nothing you do will be good enough for him.

    Ah but women do cate. They make all kinds of excuses and rationales. And they stay. Some eventually do leave, but usually in secret and certainly not making their real thoughts known. Well I think in the majority of cases anyway.

    I understand what you are saying though. All the things you would say if you could. I don't know, I just reckon that if it really was a physically abusive relationship that the lyrics needed to be more angry, less controlled or considered. If it was about physical abuse Ed would go there too. Like in Why Go?
    The whole opening of the song kinda gives me the feeling of apathy, of being stuck in a rut, of regret. And of coming to accept that despite all that you still love him. Anyway, just my take. :)
    NOPE!!!

    *~You're IT Bert!~*

    Hold on to the thread
    The currents will shift
  • Jeanie
    Jeanie Posts: 9,446
    lucylespian wrote:
    Hey Jeans, you've woken up from your Nana Nap.
    Never mind, I've kept the pot boiling for you.
    I dunno, isn't it a principle of science, that "if the outcome is truly unknown, then only research is ethical". So, if you are not sure what will happen when you sing filthy songs at work, are you not obliged to do so in order to find out ???
    I'm starting to suspect that there is another joke going on between us that neither of us were aware of. I'll keep that to the PM's.

    No Nana nap!! :D I've been at the hairdressers and have come to visit my niece, who has just informed me that she's going to show me how to use the internet!! :D Too funny!! :D She's 3!!! Anyway, in order to get me away from Play School before I stick a knife in my eye, I thought I'd check in here briefly.

    And here we are discussing the intent of the abuser in Betterman again! :)
    And other assorted musical references!! :D:D

    hehe!! Ah luce!! I think the medical profession learned pretty quickly that I am not the staid, scientific type! We muddled along as best we could, but my clear and apparent lack of stuffiness really was an issue in the end. I just didn't have the personality for it. :) Anyway, I agree that my "research" was an obligation that I took very seriously!! ;)

    Not sure what the joke is, bit mystified, but I'm sure you'll enlighten me.

    Anyway, back to Betterman have been playing it quite a bit lately and listening with new ears. It really is a great song. And to hear so many different perspectives has been fantastic. :)
    NOPE!!!

    *~You're IT Bert!~*

    Hold on to the thread
    The currents will shift
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    Jeanie wrote:
    Ah but women do cate. They make all kinds of excuses and rationales. And they stay. Some eventually do leave, but usually in secret and certainly not making their real thoughts known. Well I think in the majority of cases anyway.

    I understand what you are saying though. All the things you would say if you could. I don't know, I just reckon that if it really was a physically abusive relationship that the lyrics needed to be more angry, less controlled or considered. If it was about physical abuse Ed would go there too. Like in Why Go?
    The whole opening of the song kinda gives me the feeling of apathy, of being stuck in a rut, of regret. And of coming to accept that despite all that you still love him. Anyway, just my take. :)

    i didn't say it was a physically abusive relationship. she's tired of his shit. the way he disrespects her.

    'she needs him/that's why she'll be back again'
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • olderman
    olderman Posts: 1,765
    this is a song that my daughter and i have enjoyed and discussed and i truly believe that 'better man' has been an influence in the relationship that she and i have with each other and the relationships that she has had with the men in her life.

    i didn't raise no fool.. she'll never 'dream in red' or dread 'his' coming home.
    Down the street you can hear her scream youre a disgrace
    As she slams the door in his drunken face
    And now he stands outside
    And all the neighbours start to gossip and drool
    He cries oh, girl you must be mad,
    What happened to the sweet love you and me had?
    Against the door he leans and starts a scene,
    And his tears fall and burn the garden green
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    olderman wrote:
    this is a song that my daughter and i have enjoyed and discussed and i truly believe that 'better man' has been an influence in the relationship that she and i have with each other and the relationships that she has had with the men in her life.

    i didn't raise no fool.. she'll never 'dream in red' or dread 'his' coming home.

    yeah!! for dads who actually pay attention. :)
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • Jeanie
    Jeanie Posts: 9,446
    olderman wrote:
    this is a song that my daughter and i have enjoyed and discussed and i truly believe that 'better man' has been an influence in the relationship that she and i have with each other and the relationships that she has had with the men in her life.

    i didn't raise no fool.. she'll never 'dream in red' or dread 'his' coming home.

    That's really cool olderman. That you have that special relationship with your daughter and you are able to communicate so well together. And sharing music and ideas is an excellent way of discussing things. :)

    Just one thing though, all kinds of really smart women, can end up in bad relationships. Just because you are being abused doesn't mean you are a fool.
    Even really smart, sexy, funny women have been on the receiving end of abuse. I just wanted to make that point. :)
    NOPE!!!

    *~You're IT Bert!~*

    Hold on to the thread
    The currents will shift
  • Nothingman54
    Nothingman54 Posts: 2,251
    http://download.yousendit.com/B1DF23DF3AFDC63E
    I'll be back
  • Jeanie
    Jeanie Posts: 9,446
    Nothingman54 wrote:
    http://download.yousendit.com/B1DF23DF3AFDC63E

    Nothingman do tell what the link is please? :)

    My dodgy dial up won't play. :(
    NOPE!!!

    *~You're IT Bert!~*

    Hold on to the thread
    The currents will shift
  • Nothingman54
    Nothingman54 Posts: 2,251
    Jeanie wrote:
    Nothingman do tell what the link is please? :)

    My dodgy dial up won't play. :(


    Its a live version of Betterman, one of my fav. Just thought I'd share.
    I'll be back
  • catefrances
    catefrances Posts: 29,003
    Nothingman54 wrote:
    Its a live version of Betterman, one of my fav. Just thought I'd share.

    i just have to say, the live versions of betterman are some of my favourite songs to hear. the way the crowd sings it always thrills me.
    hear my name
    take a good look
    this could be the day
    hold my hand
    lie beside me
    i just need to say
  • Jeanie
    Jeanie Posts: 9,446
    Nothingman54 wrote:
    Its a live version of Betterman, one of my fav. Just thought I'd share.

    Aw! Thanks nothingman! :) I guess I'll hunt this down when I finally get the broadband and have a listen then.
    Very kind of you though. :)
    NOPE!!!

    *~You're IT Bert!~*

    Hold on to the thread
    The currents will shift
  • Thorns2010
    Thorns2010 Posts: 2,201
    Haven't read all the responses in the thread, so who knows if a story like mine has been posted. But a little more then 2 years ago the song was basicaly ruined for me. My girlfriend at the time said to me in an argument 'sometimes I feel like the song Betterman'

    Now I know she didn't think of the song on the level that the guy was abusive to his mate, but still man.....cold. I can barely listen to the song anymore now.

    In fact the only time I ever do listen to it is when I'm at a concert. Which I will say it is a very moving piece of music then. A whole arena singing along to a song that means so much to so many people for so many different reasons. That is just plain awsome.

    Maybe someday I'll be able to listen to the song again,, but for now if it comes up on random on my playlist....skip, or if its on the radio, yup I switch the station.

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