what's on your mind, right now?

markymark550 said:

lastexitlondon said:

markymark550 said:

Not to get too personal, but I just can't understand why things have to be so difficult for me and my wife, but come too easily for others. Just makes me sad.

I used to be in a marriage like  that.  Its very heartbreaking and makes you feel like you are inferior  and flawed. You are not

Oh gosh, I was drunk last night and should have put my phone away. I'm sorry about the cryptic post there, but my wife and I aren't having problems in our marriage. I meant that things were difficult with us trying to expand our family. We've been trying to have kids for more than a decade now, but have been unsuccessful. No luck the natural way, 2 failed IVF attempts, and now 2 adoptions that fell through. It's just tough seeing people who probably shouldn't be having kids get pregnant so easily. This last adoption attempt was particularly tough. We got to the hospital, met the baby, and fell in love with that sweet little girl. State law forces a birth mother to wait at least 24 hours before signing the adoption paperwork. The birth mom changed her mind about 3 hours before we were to sign papers. We're not sure, but we think she was just trying to use us to get money. Thankfully we had it set up so that she would receive money after the adoption was final.

markymark550 said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

markymark550 said:

lastexitlondon said:

markymark550 said:

Not to get too personal, but I just can't understand why things have to be so difficult for me and my wife, but come too easily for others. Just makes me sad.

I used to be in a marriage like  that.  Its very heartbreaking and makes you feel like you are inferior  and flawed. You are not

Oh gosh, I was drunk last night and should have put my phone away. I'm sorry about the cryptic post there, but my wife and I aren't having problems in our marriage. I meant that things were difficult with us trying to expand our family. We've been trying to have kids for more than a decade now, but have been unsuccessful. No luck the natural way, 2 failed IVF attempts, and now 2 adoptions that fell through. It's just tough seeing people who probably shouldn't be having kids get pregnant so easily. This last adoption attempt was particularly tough. We got to the hospital, met the baby, and fell in love with that sweet little girl. State law forces a birth mother to wait at least 24 hours before signing the adoption paperwork. The birth mom changed her mind about 3 hours before we were to sign papers. We're not sure, but we think she was just trying to use us to get money. Thankfully we had it set up so that she would receive money after the adoption was final.

I'm so sorry. My cousin and his wife went the adoption route about 15 years go as they had the same issues. eventually they got two brothers from an orphanage (I actually think it was still called that there) and everything seemed great. But it turned out, they both were so traumatized from their experience there, the older one started becoming violent towards them and his brother (they had to lock their bedroom doors at night-they once woke up to him standing over them with a butcher knife), and is now a drugged out prostitute they haven't heard from in a few years. 

Thanks man. It's tough, but we're not giving up hope. That's so sad for your cousin. How old were the kids when they adopted them? I've heard that kids as young as 3 can carry that kind of trauma with them. We've primarily been focused on getting a newborn, but we're thinking about expanding it to up to 2 years old. 

mfc2006 said:

We had to put our sweet pup down yesterday & it was absolutely heartbreaking.