Do you fart at work?

i'm in a cube AND I let er rip if I'm confident it won't get detected. that being said, the cube configuration several years ago was such that one of my co workers was behind me, not beside, as they are now. I thought she was gone to lunch. I quietly lifted one cheek, let it go, made a sound, very quiet, I turned around and she was fucking standing there staring at me. she slowly sat down again, without so much as a blink. 

I had to google the TB12 method. what a kook. lol

Loving your threads, Chris. LOL

I have a private bathroom now so I can let them rip in there if needed.

Funny story going back to the office that made me ring a bell whenever I went to the bathroom....it was a CPA firm that was run by an extremely uptight freak.  Staff really did not socialize much at all in the office.  There was no small talk at all because the managing partner would break up any small talk by asking if we "needed something to do". 

There was a supply cabinet in my office where they kept the usual office supplies. Sometimes another staffer would come in there and stand looking into the cabinet and talk so that she could act like she was grabbing paper or something if the managing partner came around.

I was at my desk working and had to fart really bad so I just did it. Of course it smelled like nuclear death and of course she walked in and came to the cabinet about 30 seconds after the rip.

I was horribly embarrassed because there is no way she didn't notice that shit cloud. 

HughFreakingDillon said:

Gern Blansten said:

I have a private bathroom now so I can let them rip in there if needed.

Funny story going back to the office that made me ring a bell whenever I went to the bathroom....it was a CPA firm that was run by an extremely uptight freak.  Staff really did not socialize much at all in the office.  There was no small talk at all because the managing partner would break up any small talk by asking if we "needed something to do". 

There was a supply cabinet in my office where they kept the usual office supplies. Sometimes another staffer would come in there and stand looking into the cabinet and talk so that she could act like she was grabbing paper or something if the managing partner came around.

I was at my desk working and had to fart really bad so I just did it. Of course it smelled like nuclear death and of course she walked in and came to the cabinet about 30 seconds after the rip.

I was horribly embarrassed because there is no way she didn't notice that shit cloud. 

is this an accountant term for asshole bosses to use? my old boss used it all the time before she retired. yet, she and the VP spent countless hours in his office talking shit, pretending to work. 

yep...must be

I had another job where all the staff worked downstairs in the basement of the building.  In order to leave you had to go upstairs and walk right by the partner and manager's desks.  If you ever left earlier than they thought you would get the "Hey come here a second.....what all are you working on now? Do you need more stuff to do?".

It always blew my mind because I was used to working 8a-5p so I tended to leave around 5p and get the above treatment.  We called it "walking the gauntlet".  But....if you came in at 830a and left at 530p you were considered a go-getter who wasn't a clock watcher.  Made no fucking sense.

The partner used to come in around 9a and usually left around 6p.

dankind said:

I'm strategic with my farts. Elevators and revolving doors are always up for a good cropdusting.

Vestibules at restaurants are the best.  Give those people waiting for a table a nice cropdusting on your way out to enhance their olfactory senses.

Gern Blansten said:

I have a private bathroom now so I can let them rip in there if needed.

Funny story going back to the office that made me ring a bell whenever I went to the bathroom....it was a CPA firm that was run by an extremely uptight freak.  Staff really did not socialize much at all in the office.  There was no small talk at all because the managing partner would break up any small talk by asking if we "needed something to do". 

There was a supply cabinet in my office where they kept the usual office supplies. Sometimes another staffer would come in there and stand looking into the cabinet and talk so that she could act like she was grabbing paper or something if the managing partner came around.

I was at my desk working and had to fart really bad so I just did it. Of course it smelled like nuclear death and of course she walked in and came to the cabinet about 30 seconds after the rip.

I was horribly embarrassed because there is no way she didn't notice that shit cloud. 

That's the double edged sword of an office.  Great privacy, but you definitely let it rip.  And then someone pops in and there's no one to blame.. 

Hobbes said:

@Empty Glass