what's on your mind, right now?

HughFreakingDillon said:

that I wish our family could rewind about 6 years and stay there. 

HughFreakingDillon said:

kce8 said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

that I wish our family could rewind about 6 years and stay there. 

Are the kids growing up too fast?

yes, but it's a combination of things. I was looking at a picture of the two of them walking arm in arm at the lake, and remembering how they used to be best friends and rarely fought. now they are almost 12 and almost 9, and the age gap is showing. it saddens me. I watched as the same thing happened to my wife's sister's girls. same age gap, very simliar personalities (the youngest neice and our youngest daughter look and act creepily similar, despite being 12 years apart and only really see each other at holiday dinners and birthdays-but it also bugs me a bit, as I have a hard time dealing with that neice now), and when they hit this same age, they started to hate each other when they were previously best friends. that lasted years. now they are good, but it was a long time of ridiculous drama in that house. I know that's life with teenagers, but man, it's hard to accept that when they were previously INSEPARABLE. 

but that is also the time frame prior to my oldest being diagnosed with ulcerative colitis and I didn't have crippling anxiety/depression back then. were things perfect and rosey? no, but those times seem infinitely happier and joyful and less stressed. 

mind you, there are really awesome things about the present; my youngest loves playing guitar and going to shows with me, my oldest is developing her sense of humour and we laugh a lot, which is amazing, it's nice that it's less work because of their growing independence. but I'm just one of those parents that just misses having young kids. I love the cuddles and the hugs and the surrounding feelings of love in the house that comes with that age. 

HughFreakingDillon said:

kce8 said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

kce8 said:

HughFreakingDillon said:

that I wish our family could rewind about 6 years and stay there. 

Are the kids growing up too fast?

yes, but it's a combination of things. I was looking at a picture of the two of them walking arm in arm at the lake, and remembering how they used to be best friends and rarely fought. now they are almost 12 and almost 9, and the age gap is showing. it saddens me. I watched as the same thing happened to my wife's sister's girls. same age gap, very simliar personalities (the youngest neice and our youngest daughter look and act creepily similar, despite being 12 years apart and only really see each other at holiday dinners and birthdays-but it also bugs me a bit, as I have a hard time dealing with that neice now), and when they hit this same age, they started to hate each other when they were previously best friends. that lasted years. now they are good, but it was a long time of ridiculous drama in that house. I know that's life with teenagers, but man, it's hard to accept that when they were previously INSEPARABLE. 

but that is also the time frame prior to my oldest being diagnosed with ulcerative colitis and I didn't have crippling anxiety/depression back then. were things perfect and rosey? no, but those times seem infinitely happier and joyful and less stressed. 

mind you, there are really awesome things about the present; my youngest loves playing guitar and going to shows with me, my oldest is developing her sense of humour and we laugh a lot, which is amazing, it's nice that it's less work because of their growing independence. but I'm just one of those parents that just misses having young kids. I love the cuddles and the hugs and the surrounding feelings of love in the house that comes with that age. 

Yes I understand. It was nearly the same for me and my brother. But we never hated each other, we just got in trouble at that age and then lost interest in each other. Different friends and interests, that's a normal way of growing up. 
These fights might arise because one is already separating as long as the other one is still trying to keep this close relationship. Like a couple who's slowly separating and one isn't just ready to let go. It's just happening all the time. Even that your nieces were acting similar till now that still doesn't mean the same will happen to your kids. 

Looks like you are a great caring dad! I hope you can soak up these good times you still have with them and later then find out that your kids are not getting into these really bad times because you already showed them to not act like that. 
I'm sure it won't get that bad.

And times still can get better for you! I learned lately to not regret that much anymore or feel sad about past things. 
Looking forward to what's coming your way and enjoy and take the most out of every single day. I'm trying to do that. 
When the kids grow up you get time to focus on other things again, things which you had to push back for a long time. That's great! 
I'm actually thinking about my motorbike. I still have it but not used it since over 15 years... I just can not stand seeing others driving around longer, it's like getting homesick lately ...  

I often get second looks because it's apparently odd for a man who looks like an offensive lineman to love babies. not just-born babies, ones that are sitting up and smiling and playing with your ears and your glasses and such. I'm a sucker for a 9 month old. my wife took so many pictures of our girls that age cuddling on a cold sunday afternoon with me. I look at those often. 

I do know it's a natural part of them getting older, absolutely. I had siblings. I hated my sister from age 10 or so to, well....kinda now, actually. but we hung out all the time as younger kids (15 months apart). 

anyway, I don't sit around all day thinking about the good ol days. But I have the picture I described on my office wall; I happened to look at it, and it triggered those feelings. 

having kids these ages doesn't afford me a lot of time nor energy to focus on the past anyway. LOL

RogueStoner said:

I am so naive. The level to which some people stoop to hurt others, never ceases to amaze me. Even when I think I’m prepared for anything, I am still shocked by the evil hidden within some people. 

lolobugg said:

RogueStoner said:

I am so naive. The level to which some people stoop to hurt others, never ceases to amaze me. Even when I think I’m prepared for anything, I am still shocked by the evil hidden within some people. 

what did I do now?

PJ_Soul said:

I can't decide if I should fly down to Seattle for a conference or take the train. I like the romanticism of the train, but I'd have to wake up at 3am or something like that to catch it going down, and then get home really late at night coming back, and I have to work that next morning. Obviously flying is technically way faster, but after dealing with the whole international flight shit at the airport, I wouldn't be saving that much time anyhow. Hmmmm. Gotta book, but can't decide. Money is no object - work pays for the whole trip.