9 Words Women Use

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Phantom Pain
Phantom Pain Posts: 9,876
edited June 2008 in All Encompassing Trip
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.


(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if

you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.



(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes.

Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.



(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!



(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud

sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and

arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)



(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay

means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.



(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question or Faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add

in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not

thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' ... that will bring on a 'whatever').



(8) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying F*** YOU!



(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman

has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking

'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.
My drinking team has a hockey problem

The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
Post edited by Unknown User on
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Comments

  • HailHailVitalogy
    HailHailVitalogy Posts: 6,012
    sooo fucking true...between my own mother and other girls i know, 100% accurate
    2003: Uniondale, MSG x2 | 2004: Reading | 2005: Gorge, Vancouver, Philly | 2006: East Rutherford x2, Gorge x2, Camden 1, Hartford | 2008: MSG x2, VA Beach | 2009: Philly x3 | 2010: MSG x2, Bristow | 2011: Alpine Valley x2 | 2012: MIA Philly | 2013: Wrigley, Charlottesville, Brooklyn 2 | 2014: Milan, Amsterdam 1 | 2016: MSG x2, Fenway x2, Wrigley 2 | 2018: Rome, Krakow, Berlin, Wrigley 2 | 2021: Sea Hear Now | 2022: San Diego, LA x2, MSG, Camden, Nashville, St. Louis, Denver | 2023: St. Paul 1, Chicago x2, Fort Worth x2, Austin 2 | 2024: Las Vegas 1, Seattle x2, Indy, MSG x2, Philly x2, Baltimore, Ohana 2 | 2025: Florida x2, Atlanta x2, Pittsburgh x2
  • Sian-of-the-dead
    Sian-of-the-dead Posts: 8,963
    Haha! this should be all men's BIBLE!!

    I read this and laughed so hard!

    I'm guilty of all 9 at times :o
    Been to this many PJ shows: Reading 2006 London 2007 Manchester & London 2009 Dublin, Belfast, London, Nijmegen & Berlin 2010 Manchester 1 & Manchester 2 2012...

    ... and I still think Drive-By Truckers are better.
  • Phantom Pain
    Phantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    HailHailVitalogy wrote:
    sooo fucking true...between my own mother and other girls i know, 100% accurate

    Scary ain't it ??

    Every woman I know it fits !
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • Phantom Pain
    Phantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    chiefojibwa wrote:
    ha ha! sweeping generalizations based on gender!!! soooo funny!!!!!!!!!!

    thanks a lot for the list, btw.

    I've noticed these words a lot more since I've been married

    :o
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • harmless_little_f***
    harmless_little_f*** Posts: 8,005
    When I got my latest tattoo my mum said 'Well done'. You can add that to the list.
    'We're learning songs for baby Jesus' birthday. His mum and dad were Merry and Joseph. He had a bed made of clay and the three kings bought him Gold, Frankenstein and Merv as presents.'

    - the great Sir Leo Harrison
  • dirt
    dirt Posts: 398
    Phantom Pain wrote:
    (2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

    Wait a second, if you're granted 'five more minutes' to watch the game, that's actually TWO.

    That one's a powder keg all the way...
    drive less - RIDE MORE!
  • westsidepie
    westsidepie Posts: 627
    dirt wrote:
    Wait a second, if you're granted 'five more minutes' to watch the game, that's actually TWO.

    That one's a powder keg all the way...

    That one is also the all purpose phrase, because you can only determine how much time you have or don't have based on the situation. This one frustrates me the most, since it always turns into a vicious loop.
    To pie I will reply
    But mr. justam
    is who I am

    "That's a repulsive combination of horrible information and bad breath."-Pickles

    "Remember, death is a natural part of the workplace. So, when you see a dead body at work, don't freak out, just ring your death bell." "ting"-Toki Wartooth
  • AmentsChick
    AmentsChick Posts: 6,969
    As a woman...I'd like to say...


    All of this is true.
    This is the greatest band in the world -- Ben Harper

  • dirt
    dirt Posts: 398
    westsidepie wrote:
    That one is also the all purpose phrase, because you can only determine how much time you have or don't have based on the situation. This one frustrates me the most, since it always turns into a vicious loop.

    Indeed. This two word phrase takes years for a guy to master and comprehend.
    drive less - RIDE MORE!
  • libragirl
    libragirl Posts: 4,632
    Yeah, I would say this is accurate :)
    These cuts are leaving creases. Trace the scars to fit the pieces, to tell the story, you don't need to say a word.
  • urbanhippie
    urbanhippie Posts: 3,007
    Erm......I think I've used every single one of em :o

    Read and learn boys, read and learn....
    A human being that was given to fly.

    Wembley 18/06/07

    If there was a reason, it was you.

    O2 Arena 18/09/09
  • Lukin66
    Lukin66 Posts: 3,063
    AmentsChick wrote:
    As a woman...I'd like to say...


    All of this is true.
    lol....I say all of these things
    deep, deep blue of the morning
    gets to me every time
  • Phantom Pain
    Phantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    Just doing my part to help my fellow man

    Gents print this out and make copies !
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • AmentsChick
    AmentsChick Posts: 6,969
    Lukin66 wrote:
    lol....I say all of these things

    See, it's not just me then! :D
    This is the greatest band in the world -- Ben Harper

  • Phantom Pain
    Phantom Pain Posts: 9,876
    AmentsChick wrote:
    See, it's not just me then! :D

    It's all women !

    You're all out to freak guys out with your hidden meanings

    :p
    My drinking team has a hockey problem

    The ONLY thing better than a glass of beer is tea with Miss McGill



    A protuberance of flesh above the waistband of a tight pair of trousers
  • westsidepie
    westsidepie Posts: 627
    dirt wrote:
    Indeed. This two word phrase takes years for a guy to master and comprehend.

    This is so true, and why commitment is a good thing. Not only does this phrase change with every situation, the meanings can be flipped from woman to woman. It take years to learn the intricacies and subtleties of meaning with one woman. Now imagine you break up with her, and your new girlfriend has a completely new set of meanings. It is a life long learning process.
    To pie I will reply
    But mr. justam
    is who I am

    "That's a repulsive combination of horrible information and bad breath."-Pickles

    "Remember, death is a natural part of the workplace. So, when you see a dead body at work, don't freak out, just ring your death bell." "ting"-Toki Wartooth
  • MattCameronKicksButt
    MattCameronKicksButt Posts: 4,317
    I use no. 1 A LOT!

    no. 8 I always use jokingly. It means 'you may be right but I don't care' in my language.

    I never say any of the others.
  • comebackwoman
    comebackwoman Posts: 7,271
    I'm guilty of 8 of these :o I don't do the "5 more minutes" thing though - I know exactly how long it will take me to get ready...I hate being late and I don't want him bugging me while I'm getting ready...so I've usually got it well timed...but the rest are all me :o
    There's a light when my baby's in my arms :)
  • AmentsChick
    AmentsChick Posts: 6,969
    comebackgirl wrote:
    I'm guilty of 8 of these :o I don't do the "5 more minutes" thing though - I know exactly how long it will take me to get ready...I hate being late and I don't want him bugging me while I'm getting ready...so I've usually got it well timed...but the rest are all me :o

    HAHAHA. Agreed. I *HATE* being late.
    This is the greatest band in the world -- Ben Harper

  • edvedder913
    edvedder913 Posts: 1,810
    Hilarious! and true...

    I am guilty of all but #2 and #3. I am almost always on time and if I am pissed I say so (most of the time), but I never say NOTHING.

    :)

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